Six Sermons, Sermon 4
SERMON II. OF THE Education of Children.
PROV. XXII. 6.
Train up a child in the way he ſhould go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.
V. THE good Education of Children conſiſts in giving them good Example. This courſe David took in his Family, as appears by that ſolemn Reſolution of his, Pſal. 101. 2. I will behave my ſelf wiſely in a perfect way… I will walk within my houſe with a perfect heart. Let Parents and Maſters of Fa…ilies give good Example to their Children and Servants, in a conſtant ſerving of God in their Families, which will nouriſh Religion in thoſe that are under their care: And let them alſo be Exemplary in a ſober and holy Converſ…t…on before thoſe that belong to them.
And let not your Children, as far as is poſſible, have any bad Examples to converſe with, either among your Servants, or their own Companions; leſt by walking with them they learn their way and get a blot to their Souls. There is a contagion in Example, and nothing doth more ſlily inſinuate it ſelf and gain upon us than a living and familiar Pattern; therefore, as much as in you lies, let Children always have good Examples before them.
Eſpecially, let Parents themſelves be exemplary to them in the beſt things, becauſe their Example is of all other the moſt powerful and carries greateſt Authority with it. And without this, Inſtruction will ſignify very little, and the great force and effica…y of it will be loſt. We ſhall find it very hard to perſuade our Children to do that which they ſee we do not practiſe our ſelves. For even Children have ſo much ſenſe and ſagacity as to underſtand that actions are more real …han words, and a more certain indication of what a man doth truly and inwardly believe. Example is the moſt lively way of teaching, and becauſe Children are much given to imitation, it is likewiſe a very delightful way of inſtruction, and that of which Children are moſt capable; both becauſe it is beſt underſtood, and is apt to make the deepeſt impreſſion upon them.
So that Parents, above all others, have one Argument to be Religious and good themſelves, for the ſake of their Children. If you deſire to have them good, the beſt way to make them ſo is to give them the Example of it in being good your ſelves. For this reaſon Parents ſhould take great care to do nothing but what is worthy of imitation. Your Children will follow you in what you do, therefore do not go before them in any thing that is evil. The evil Example of Parents is both a temptation and encouragement to Children to Sin, becauſe it is a kind of Authority for what they do, and looks like a juſtification of their wickedneſs.
With what reaſon canſt thou expect that thy Children ſhould follow thy good Inſtructions, when thou thy ſelf giveſt them an ill Example? Thou doſt but as it were be…kon to them with thy head and ſhew them the way to Heaven by thy good Cou…ſel, but thou takeſt them by the …and and leadeſt them in the way to Hell by thy contrary Ex…mple. When ever you ſwear, or tell a lye, or are paſſionate and furious, or come dr…nk into your Family, you weaken the Authority of your Commands, and loſe all reverence and obedience to them by contradicting your own Precepts.
The Precepts of a good man are apt to raiſe and inflame others to the imitation of them, but when they come from one who is faulty and vicious in that kind himſelf they are languid and faint, and give us no heart and encouragement to the exerciſe of thoſe Virtues which we plainly ſee they do not practiſe themſelves. It is the Apoſtle's Argument, Thou therefore that teacheſt another, teacheſt thou not thy ſelf? Thou that teacheſt thy Children to ſpeak truth, doſt thou tell a lye? Thou that ſayeſt they muſt not ſwear, doſt thou profane the Name of God by cuſtomary Oaths and Curſes? Thou art unfit to be a guide of the blind, a light to them that are in darkneſs, an inſtructer of the fooliſh, and a teacher of Ba…es; becauſe thou thy ſelf …aſt only a form of Knowledge and of …ruth in the Law, but art deſtitute of the life and practice of it. In a word, if you be not careful to give good Example to your Children you defeat your own counſels and undermine the beſt inſtructions you can give them; and they will all be ſpilt like water upon the barren Sands, they will have no effect, they will bring forth no fruit.
VI. Good Education conſiſts in wiſe and early Reſtraints from that which is evil, by …eaſonable Reproof and Correction. And this alſo is one way of Inſtruction: So Solomon t…ll… us, Prov. 29. 15. The Rod and Re…roof giveth wiſdom: And though both theſe do ſuppoſe a Fault that is paſt, yet the great end of them is to prevent the like for the fu…ure, and to …e an admonition to them for the time to come. And therefore whatever will probably be effectual for future Caution and Ame…dment ought to be ſufficient in this kind, becauſe the End is always to give meaſure to the Means: And where a mild and gentle Rebuke will do the buſineſs, Reproof may ſtop there without proceeding further: Or when that will not do, if a ſharp word and a ſevere admonition will be effectual, the Rod may be ſpared.
Provided always, that our Lenity give no encouragement to Sin, and be ſo managed that Children may perceive that you are in good earneſt, and reſolved that if they will not reform they ſhall certainly be puniſh'd. And provided likewiſe, that your Lenity bear a due proportion to the nature and quality of the Fault. We muſt not uſe mildneſs in the caſe of a wilful and heinous Sin, eſpecially if it be exemplary and of publick influence. To rebuke gently upon ſuch on Occaſion is rather to countenance the Fault, and ſeems to argue that we are not ſenſible enough of the Enormity of it, and that we have not a due diſlike and deteſtation for it: Such cold Reproofs as thoſe which old Eli gave his Sons, 1 Sam… 2. 23, 24. Why do you ſuch things? For I hear of your evil dealing by all this People, that is, their carriage was ſuch as gave publick Scandal: Nay, my Sons; for it is not a good Report that I hear, you make the Lord's People to tranſgreſs.
Such a cold Reproof as this, where the Crime was ſo great and notorious, was a kind of allowance of it, and a partaking with them in their Sin; and ſo God interprets it, and therefore calls it a kicking at his Sacrifice, and a deſpiſing of his Offering, Chap. 2. 19. And he threatens Eli with moſt terrible Judgments upon this very account, becauſe his Sons made themſelves vile, and he reſtrained them not.
So that our Severity muſt be proportioned to the Crime. Where the Fault is great, there greater Severity muſt be uſed; ſo much at leaſt as may be an effectual Reſtraint for the future. Here was Eli's miſcarriage, that in the caſe of ſo great a Fault as his Sons were guilty of, his proceeding was neither proportioned to the Crime, nor to the End of Reproof and Correction, which is Amendment for the future: But he uſed ſuch a mildneſs in his Reproof of them, as was more apt to encourage than reſtrain them in their vile courſes: For ſo the Text ſays, that his Sons made themſelves vile, and he reſtrained them not.
There are indeed ſome Diſpoſitions ſo very tender and tractable, that a gentle Reproof will ſuffice. But moſt Children are of that temper that Correction muſt be ſometimes uſed, and a fond Indulgence in this Caſe is many times their utter ruin and undoing; and in truth not Love but hatred. So the Wiſe-man tells us, Prov. 13. 24. He that ſpareth the Rod hateth his Son, but he that loveth him chaſteneth him betimes. Chap. 19. 18. Chaſten thy Son while there is hope, and let not thy Soul ſpare for his Crying. And again, Chap. 22. 15. Fooliſhneſs is bound up in the heart of a Child, and the Rod of correction ſhall drive it far from him. Chap. 23. 13, 14. Withhold not correction from the child, for if thou beateſt him with the rod he ſhall not dye: Thou ſhalt beat him with the Rod, and ſhalt deliver his Soul from Hell. Again, Chap. 29. 15. The Rod and Reproof giveth wiſdom, but a Child left to himſelf bringeth his Mother to ſhame: He mentions the Mother emphatically, becauſe She many times is moſt faulty in this fond indulgence; and therefore the ſhame and grief of it doth juſtly fall upon Her.
So that Correction is of great uſe, and often neceſſary; and Parents that forbear it are not only cruel to their Children, but to Themſelves: For God many times puniſheth thoſe Parents very ſeverely who have neglected this neceſſary piece of Di…cipline… There is hardly to be found in the whole Bible a more terrible temporal Threatning than that concerning Eli and his Houſe, for his ſond indulgence to his Sons, who when they came to be Men proved ſuch horrible Scandals not only to their Fathe…, but to the Prieſt's Office; and to that degree as to make the Sacrifices of the Lord to be abhorred by all the P…ople. I will recite the Threatning at large, for an Admonition to Parents that they be not guilty in this kind, 1 Sam. 3. 11, 12, 13, 14. The Lord ſaid to Samuel, Behold I will do a thing in Iſrael at which both the ears of every one that beareth it ſhall tingle: In that day I will perform againſt Eli all things which I have ſpoken concerning his Houſe; when I begin I will alſo make an end. For I have told him that I will judge his Houſe for ever for the Iniquity which he knoweth, becauſe his Sons made themſelves vile and he reſtrained them not: And therefore I have ſworn unto the Houſe of Eli, that the Iniquity of Eli's Houſe ſhall not be purged with Sacrifice nor Offering for ever. I know very well that this enormous wickedneſs of Eli's Sons was committed by them after they were grown to be Men, but this Inſtance is nevertheleſs to my preſent purpoſe, there being hardly any doubt to be made but that it was the natural effect of a remiſs and too indulgent an Education.
Yea very often God doth correct and remarkably puniſh fond Parents by thoſe very Children who have wanted due Reproof and Correction: Of which the Scripture gives us a remarkable Inſtance in Adonijah, upon the mention of whoſe Rebellion againſt David his Father the Text takes particular notice of his Father's extreme fondneſs of him, as both the procuring and meritorious cauſe of it, For his Fath…r had not diſpleaſed him at any time in ſaying why haſt thou done ſo? And on the contrary, the wiſe Son of Sirach tells us, that he that chaſtiſeth his Son ſhall have joy of him.
VII. The next thing I ſhall mention as a part of good Education is, the bringing of Children to be publickly Catechiſed by the Miniſter, to prepare them for ſolemn Confirmation.
It was with a particular reſpect to this work of publick Catechiſing, and by way of introduction to it, that I at firſt propoſed to treat thus largely of the good Education of Children, hoping it might be of good uſe to handle this Subject more fully than it hath uſually been done, at leaſt to my knowledge, from the Pulpit.
And therefore I ſhall ſay ſomething, and that very briefly concerning the nature, and concerning the neceſſity and great uſefulneſs of Catechiſing Children.
Firſt, For the nature of it, it is a particular way of teaching by Queſtion and Anſwer, accommodated and fitted for the inſtruction of Children in the Principles of Religion. I do not indeed find, that this particular method is any where enjoined in Scripture; but Inſtruction in general is: And I doubt not but that upon this general warrant Parents and Miniſters may uſe that way of Inſtruction of Children which is moſt fit and proper to inſtill into them the Principles of Religion. It is true, that the word foreign, from whence our word Catechiſm doth come, is uſed in Scripture to ſignify teaching in general: But it hath ſince by Eccleſiaſtical Writers been appropriated to that particular way of Inſtruction which hath been long in uſe in the Chriſtian Church, and is commonly called Catechiſing.
Secondly, As to the neceſſity and great uſefulneſs of it; Catechiſing hath a particular advantage as to Children: Becauſe they are ſubject to forgetfulneſs, and want of attention. Now Catechiſing is a good Remedy againſt both theſe; becauſe by Queſtions put to them Children are forced to take notice of what is taught, and muſt give ſome Anſwer to the Queſtion that is ask'd: And a Catechiſm being ſhort, and containing in a little compaſs the moſt neceſſary Principles of Religion, it is the more eaſily remembred.
The great uſefulneſs and indeed the neceſſity of it plainly appears by experience. For it very ſeldom happens, that Children which have not been catechiſed have any clear and competent knowledge of the Principles of Religion; and for want of this are incapable of receiving any great benefit by Sermons, which ſuppoſe perſons to be in ſome meaſure inſtructed before-hand in the main Principles of Religion.
Beſides, that if they have no Principles of Religion fix'd in them, they become an eaſy Prey to Seducers. And we have had ſad experience of this in our Age; and among many other diſmal effects of our late Civil Confuſions this is none of the leaſt, that publick Catechiſing was almoſt wholly diſuſed, and private too in moſt Families: For had Catechiſing of Children been continued, it is very probable that this Age would have been infeſted with fewer Errors and with fewer Schiſms; and that there would not have been ſo much Apoſtaſy from the Fundamentals of Religion. For it is, I think, a true Obſervation, that Catechiſing, and the Hiſtory of the Martyrs have been the two great Pillars of the Proteſtant Religion.
There being then ſo great a neceſſity and uſefulneſs of this Way of Inſtruction, I would earneſtly recommend the practiſe of it to Parents and Maſters of Families with reſpect to their Children and Servants. For I do not think that this Work ſhould lie wholly upon Miniſters. You muſt do your part at home, who by your conſtant reſidence in your Families have better and more eaſy opportunities of inculcating the Principles of Religion upon your Children and Servants. There you muſt prepare them for publick Catechiſing, that the Work of the Miniſter may not be too heavy upon him.
As to the part which concerns Miniſters, I intend by God's aſſiſtance, ſo ſoon as the buſineſs can be put into a good method, to begin this Exerciſe. And I do earneſtly intreat all that have young Children and Servants, to bring ſuch of them as are fit to be publickly Catechiſed and inſtructed in the Principles of Religion: And I ſhall as often as ſhall be thought expedient ſpend ſome time in this Work, between afternoon Prayers and Sermon.
The Catechiſm to be uſed ſhall be that appointed in our Liturgy, which is ſhort, and contains in it the chief Principles of the Chriſtian Religion. And I ſhall make a ſhort and plain explication of the Heads of it, ſuitable to the capacity of Children. And becauſe this may not probably be of ſo great advantage to thoſe who are of riper Years and Underſtandings, yet becauſe Children are to be inſtructed as well as men, I muſt intreat thoſe who are like to carry away the leaſt profit to bring with them the more patience: Eſpecially ſince I ſhall for their ſakes, in the conſtant courſe of my Afternoon S…rmons, more largely and fully explain the chief Principles of the Chriſtian Belief: A Work which you know I have ſome time ago entred upon.
VIII. The laſt thing I ſhall mention, and with which the State of Childhood ends, is the bringing of Children to the Biſhop, to be ſolemnly Confirm'd, by their taking upon themſelves the Vow which by their Sureties they entred into at their Baptiſm.
This is acknowledged by almoſt all Sects and Parties of Chriſtians to be of Primitive Antiquity, and of very great uſe when it is performed with that due preparation of perſons for it, by the Miniſters to whoſe charge they belong, and with that ſeriouſneſs and Solemnity which the nature of the thing doth require.
And to that end it were very deſirable that Confirmations ſhould be more frequent, and in ſmaller Numbers at a time; that ſo the Biſhop may apply himſelf more particularly to every Perſon that is to be Confirmed, that by this means the thing may make the deeper impreſſion and lay the ſtronger obligation upon them.
One thing more I could wiſh, both to prevent confuſion, and for the eaſe alſo of the Biſhop that his work may not be endleſs, that Miniſters would take care that none may preſent themſelves to the Biſhop or be preſented by the Miniſters, to be Confirmed a ſecond time: Becauſe a great many are wont to offer themſelves every time there is a Confirmation; which is both very diſorderly and unreaſonable, there being every whit as little reaſon for a ſecond Confirmation, as there is for a ſecond Baptiſm: And if any perſons need ſo often to be Confirmed, it is a ſign that Confirmation hath very little effect upon them.
II. I proceed to the Second general Head, which was to give ſome more particular Directions for the management of this Work of the good Education of Children in ſuch a way as may be moſt effectual to its End.
Firſt, Endeavour, as well as you can, to diſcover the particular temper and diſpoſition of Children, that you may ſuit and apply your ſelves to it, and by ſtriking in with Nature may ſteer and govern them in the ſweeteſt and eaſieſt way. This is like knowledge of the nature of the ground to be planted, which Husbandmen are wont very carefully to enquire into, that they may apply the Seed to the Soil, and plant in it that which is moſt proper for it:
Quid quae que ferat regio, quid quae que recuſet.
Hic ſegetes, illic veniunt fo…liciùs uvae.
Every Soil is not proper for all ſorts of Grain or Fruit; one ground is fit for Corn, another for Vin…s: And ſo is it in the tempers and diſpoſitions of Children: Some are more capable of one Excellency and Virtue than another, and ſome more ſtrongly inclined to one Vice than another: Which is a great Se…ret of Nature and Providence, and it is very hard to give a juſt and ſatisfactory account of it.
It is good therefore to know the particular Tempers of Children, that we may accordingly apply our care to them and manage them to the beſt advantage: That where we diſcern in them any forward inclinations to good, we may caſt in ſuch Seeds and Principles, as, by their ſuitableneſs to their particular Tempers, we judge moſt likely to take ſooneſt and deepeſt root: And when theſe are grown up, and have taken poſſeſſion of the Soil, they will prepare it for the Seeds of other Virtues.
And ſo likewiſe when we diſcover in their Nature a more particular diſpoſition and leaning towards any thing which is bad, we muſt with great diligence and care apply ſuch Inſtructions and plant ſuch Principles in them, as may be moſt effectual, to alter this evil diſpoſition of their Minds; that whilſt Nature is tender and flexible we may gently bend it the other way: And it is almoſt incredible what ſtrange things by Prudence and Patience may be done towards the rectifying of a very perverſe and crooked Diſpoſition.
So that it is of very great uſe to obſerve and diſcover the particular Tempers of Children, that in all our inſtruction and management of them, we may apply our ſelves to their Nature and hit their peculiar Diſpoſition: By this means we may lead and draw them to their Duty in human ways, and ſuch as are much more agreeable to their Temper than conſtraint and neceſſity, which are harſh and churliſh, and againſt the grain. Whatever is done with delight goes on cheerfully, but when Nature is compell'd and forc'd, things proceed heavily: Therefore, when we are forming and faſhioning Children to Religion and Virtue, we ſhould make all the advantage we can of their particular Tempers. This will be a good direction and help to us to conduct Nature in the way it will moſt eaſily go. Every Temper gives ſome particular advantage and handle whereby we may take hold of them and ſteer them more eaſily: But if we take a contrary courſe we muſt expect to meet with great difficulty and reluctancy.
Such ways of Education as are prudently fitted to the particular diſpoſitions of Children are like Wind and Tide together, which will make the Work go on amain: But thoſe ways and methods which are applied croſs to Nature are like Wind againſt Tide, which make a great ſtir and conflict, but a very ſlow progreſs. Not that I do, or can expect that all Parents ſhould be Philoſophers, but that they ſhould uſe the beſt wiſdom they have in a matter of ſo great concernment.
Secondly, In your inſtruction of Children endeavour to plant in them thoſe Principles of Religion and Virtue which are moſt ſubſtantial, and are like to have the beſt influence upon the future government of their Lives, and to be of continual and laſting uſe to them. Look to the Seed you ſow, that it be ſound and good, and for the benefit and uſe of mankind: This is to be regarded, as well as the G…ound into which the Seed is caſt.
Labour to beget in Children a right apprehenſion of thoſe things which are moſt fundamental and neceſſary to the knowledge of God and our Duty; and to make them ſenſible of the great evil and danger of Sin; and to work in …hem a firm belief of the next Life and of the eternal Rewards and Recompences of it. And if theſe Principles once take root they will ſpread far and wide, and have a vaſt influence upon all their actions; and unleſs ſome …owerful Luſt, or temptation to Vice …urry them away, they will probably accompany them, and ſtick by them as …ong as they live.
Many Parents, according to their …eſt knowledge and apprehenſions of Religion in which they themſelves …ave been educated, and too often according to their Zeal without knowledge, do take great care to plant little and ill-grounded Opinions in the minds of their Children, and to faſhion them to a Party, by infuſing into them the particular Notions and Phraſes of a Sect, which when they come to be examin'd have no ſubſtance, nor perhaps ſenſe in them: And by this means, inſtead of bringing them up in the true and ſolid Principles of Chriſtianity, they take a great deal of pains to inſtruct them in ſome doubtful Doctrines of no great moment in Religion, and perhaps falſe at the bottom; whereby inſtead of teaching them to hate Sin they fix them in Schiſm, and teach them to hate and damn all thoſe who differ from them and are oppoſite to them; who yet are perhaps much more in the right, and far better Chriſtians than themſelves.
And indeed nothing is more common and more to be pitied, than to ſee with what a confident contempt and ſcornful pity ſome ill-inſtructed and ignorant people will lament the blindneſs and ignorance of thoſe who have a thouſand times more true knowledge and skill than themſelves, not only in all other things, but even in the practiſe as well as knowledge of the Chriſtian Religion; believing thoſe who do not reliſh their affected Phraſes and uncouth Forms of ſpeech to be ignorant of the Myſtery of the Goſpel, and utter ſtrangers to the Life and Power of Godlineſs.
But now what is the effect of this miſtaken way of Education? The Harveſt is juſt anſwerable to the Huſbandry,
Infoelix lolium & ſteriles dominantur avenae;
As they have ſown, ſo they muſt expect to reap; and inſtead of good Grain to have Cockle and Tares: They have ſown the Wind, and they ſhall reap the Whirlwind; as the expreſſion is in the Prophet; inſtead of true Religion, and of a ſober and peaceable Converſation, there will come up new and wild Opinions, a factious and uncharitable ſpirit, a furious and boiſterous zeal, which will neither ſuffer themſelves to be quiet, nor any body that is about them.
But if you deſire to reap the effects of true Piety and Religion, you muſt take care to plant in Children the main and ſubſtantial Principles of Chriſtianity, which may give them a general byaſs to holineſs and goodneſs, and not to little particular Opinions, which being once fix'd in them by the ſtrong prejudice of Education will hardly ever be rooted out.
Thirdly, Do all that in you lies to check and diſcourage in them the firſt beginnings of Sin and Vice: So ſoon as ever they appear pluck them up by the Roots. This is like the weeding of Corn, which is a neceſſary piece of good Husbandry. Vices like ill weeds grow apace, and if they once take to the Soil it will be hard to extirpate and kill them: But if we watch them and cut them up aſſoon as they appear, this will diſcourage the Root and make it dye.
Therefore take great heed that your Children be not habituated and accuſtomed to any evil courſe. A Vice that is of any conſiderable growth and continuance will ſoon grow obſtinate, and having once ſpread its roots it will be a very difficult matter to clear the ground of it. A Child may be ſo long neglected till he be overgrown with Vice to that degree, that it may be out of the power of Parents ever to bring him to good fruit. If it once gain upon the depraved diſpoſition of Children it will be one of the hardeſt things in the World to give a ſtop to it. It is the Apoſtle's caution to take heed of being harden'd by the deceitfulneſs of Sin, which they who go on in an evil courſe will moſt certainly be. We ſhould obſerve the firſt appearances of evil in Children, and kill thoſe young Serpents aſſoon as they ſtir leſt they bite them to death.
Fourthly. Bring them, aſſoon as they are capable of it, to the publick Worſhip of God, where He hath promiſed his more eſpecial preſence and bleſſing. It is in Zion, the place of God's publick Worſhip, where the Lord hath commanded the bleſſing even Life for evermore: There are the means which God hath appointed for the begetting and increaſing of Grace in us: This is the Pool where the Angel uſeth to come and to move the Waters: Bring your Children hither, where if they diligently attend they may meet with an Opportunity of being healed.
And when they come from the Church, call them frequently to an account of what they have heard and learn'd there: This will make them both to attend more diligently to what they hear, and to lay it up in their Memories with greater care, and will fix it there ſo as to make a deeper and more laſting impreſſion upon their Minds.
Fifthly, Be careful more eſpecially to put them upon the exerciſe and practice of Religion and Virtue, in ſuch Inſtances as their underſtanding and age are capable of. Teach them ſome ſhort and proper Forms of Prayer to God, to be ſaid by them devoutly upon their knees in private, at leaſt every Morning and Even…ng. A great many Children neglect this, not from any ill diſpoſition of mind, but becauſe no body takes care to teach them how to do it. And if they were taught and put upon doing it, the habit and cuſtom of any thing will after a little while make that eaſy and delightful enough, which they cannot afterwards be brought to without great difficulty and reluctancy.
Knowledge and Practice do mutually… promote and help forward one another… Knowledge prepares and diſpoſeth for Practice, and Practice is the beſt way to perfect Knowledge in any kind. Mere Speculation is a very raw and rude thing in compariſon of that true and diſtinct knowledge which is gotten by Practice and Experience. The moſt exact skill in Geography is nothing compared with the knowledge of that Man who beſides the Speculative part hath travell'd over and carefully view'd the Countries he hath read of. The moſt knowing man in the Art and Rules of Navigation is no body in compariſon of an experienced Pilot and Seaman. Becauſe knowledge perfected by practice is as much dif…erent from mere Speculation as the skill of doing a thing is from being told how a thing is to be done. For men may eaſily miſtake Rules, but frequent Practiſe and Experience are ſeldom deceived. Give me a man that conſtantly does a thing well, and that ſhall ſatisfy me that he knows how to do it. That Saying of our B. Saviour, If any man will do my will, he ſhall know of the Doctrine whether it be of God, or whether I ſpeak of my ſelf, is a clear determination of this matter, namely, That they underſtand the Will of God beſt who are moſt careful to do it. And ſo likewiſe the beſt way to know what God is, is to tranſcribe his Perfections in our Lives and Actions; to be holy, and juſt, and good, and merciful as He is.
Therefore when the minds of Children are once thoroughly poſſeſt with the true Principles of Religion, we ſhould bend all our endeavours to put them upon the practice of what they know: Let them rather be taught to do well than to talk well; rather to avoid what is evil, in all its ſhapes and appearances, and to practiſe their Duty in the ſeveral Inſtances of it, than to ſpeak with the Tongues of Men and Angels: Unto Man He ſaid, Behold! the fear of the Lord, that is wiſdom, and to depart from evil is underſtanding, Job 28. 28. Hereby, …aith St. John, we know that we know him, if we keep his Commandments: He that ſaith I know him and keepeth not his Commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, 1 Joh. 2. 3, 4.
Xenophon tells us, that the Perſians inſtead of making their Children learned, taught them to be virtuous; and inſtead of filling their heads with fine Speculations, taught them honeſty, and ſincerity, and reſolution; and endeavoured to make them wiſe and valiant, juſt and temperate. Lycurgus alſo in the inſtitution of the Lacedemonian Commonwealth took no care about Learning, but only about the Lives and Manners of their Children: Though I ſhould think that the care of both is beſt, and that Learning would very much help to form the Manners of Children, and to make them both wiſer and better Men: And therefore, with the leave of ſo great and wiſe a Lawgiver, I cannot but think that this was a defect in his Inſtitution… Becauſe Learning, if it be under the conduct of true wiſdom and goodneſs is not only an ornament but a great advantage to the better Government of any Kingdom or Commonwealth.
Sixthly, There muſt be great care and diligence uſed in this whole buſineſs of Education, and more particularly in the Inſtruction of Children. There muſt be line upon line, and precept upon precept, here a little and there a little, as the Prophet expreſſeth it, Iſa. 28. 10. The Principles of Religion and Virtue muſt be inſtill'd and dropt into them by ſuch degrees and in ſuch a meaſure as they are capable of receiving them: For Children are narrow-mouth'd Veſſels, and a great deal cannot be poured into them at once.
And they muſt alſo be accuſtomed to the practice and exerciſe of Religion and goodneſs by degrees, till Holineſs and Virtue have taken root, and they be well ſettled and confirm'd in a good courſe. Now this requires conſtant attendance and even the patience of the Husbandman to wait for the fruit of our labours.
In ſome Children the Seeds that are ſown fall into a greater depth of earth and therefore are of a …low diſcloſure, and it may be a conſiderable time before they appear above ground; it is long before they ſhoot and grow up to any heighth, and yet they may afterwards be very conſiderable: Which, as an ingenious Author obſerves, Sir H. W.ſhould excite the care and prevent the deſpair of Parents: For if their Children be not ſuch ſpeedy Spreaders and Branchers as the vine, they may perhaps prove
—proles tardè creſcentis Olivae.
It is a work of great pains and difficulty to rectify a perverſe Diſpoſition. It is more eaſy to palliate the corruption of Nature, but the cure of it requires time and careful looking to. An evil temper and inclination may be covered and conceal'd, but it is a great work to conquer and ſubdue it. It muſt firſt be check'd and ſtopp'd in its courſe, and then weaken'd and the force of it be broken by degrees, and at laſt, if it be poſſible, de…troyed and rooted out.
Seventhly and Laſtly, To all theſe means we muſt add our conſtant and earneſt Prayers to God for our Children, that his Grace may take an early poſſeſſion of them; that he would give them virtuous inclinations and towardly diſpoſitions for goodneſs: And that he would be pleaſed to accompany all our endeavours to that end with his powerful Aſſiſtance and Bleſſing; without which all that we can do will prove ineffectual. Parents may plant, and Miniſters may water, but it is God that muſt give the increaſe.
Be often then upon your knees for your Children. Do not only teach them to pray for themſelves, but do you likewiſe with great fervour and earneſtneſs commend them to God and to the power of his Grace which alone is able to ſanctify them. Apply your ſelves to the Father of lights; from whom comes every good and perfect gift: Beg his H. Spirit, and ask Divine knowledge and wiſdom for them of Him, who giveth to all liberally and upbraideth no man: Beſeech Him to ſeaſon their tender years with his Fear, which is the beginning of Wiſdom: Pray for them as Abraham did for Iſhmael, Oh that Iſhmael may live in thy ſight.
Many Parents, having …ound all their endeavours for a long time together ineffectual, have at length betook themſelves to Prayer, earneſt and importunate Prayer to God, as their laſt Refuge. Monica, the Mother of St. Auſtin, by the conſtancy and importunity of her Prayers, obtained of God the converſion of her Son, who proved afterwards ſo great and glorious an Inſtrument of good to the Church of God: According to what St. Ambroſe Biſhop of Milain, to encourage her to perſevere in her fervent Prayers for her Son, had ſaid to her, Fieri non poteſt ut filius tot lachrymarum pereat, It cannot be, ſays he, that a Son of ſo many Prayers and Tears ſhould miſcarry. God's Grace is free, but it is not likely but that God will at laſt give in this Bleſſing to our earneſt Prayers and faithful Endeavours.
Therefore pray for them without ceaſing, pray and faint not. Great importunity in Prayer ſeldom fails of a gracious anſwer: Our B. Saviour ſpake two Parables on purpoſe to encourage us herein: Not becauſe God is moved, much leſs becauſe he is tired out with our Importunity; but becauſe it is an Argument of our firm belief and confidence in his great Goodneſs: And to them that believe all things are poſſible, ſays our B. Lord, To whom &c.