The Fathers Tears over his Daughters Remains, Letter 10 – Letter 14
My Dear and only Siſter,
THough we are abſent, I hope we are not forgetful of each other. I am ſure my Tho'ts are often employ'd about you, and I am daily concern'd for you. You have now juſt paſt your Childhood, and are arriv'd to that Stage of Life which is moſt expos'd to Snares and Temptations; and according as you behave in it, your Reflections will be uneaſy or comfortable afterwards. Think not the Counſels of a Siſter, who loves you as her ſelf, unſeaſonable; or the Effect of melancholy Vapours. No, It is from the beſt Love to you, and my great Deſire to ſee you vertuous and happy.
Let me warn you then of the Vanity and Deceit there is in all Worldly Things, and urge you to imploy your Time in working out your Soul's Salvation; and therefore in learning thoſe things that will help you Heavenward; and not ſpend it in thoſe Pleaſures that will not profit, or in thoſe Follies and Sins which will in the End bite like a Serpent and ſting like an Adder. — You have a precious Opportunity for Inſtruction and Improvement under the beſt of earthly Fathers. O then improve it to the beſt Purpoſes, leſt you provoke God to deprive you of your Advantages, and take away your Father from your Head —O remember your Creator now, even now in the Days of your Youth: Let him have your firſt Love and Service: Keep in Mind what Chriſt the Wiſdom of God ſays, I love them that love me, and thoſe that ſeek me early ſhall find me. Fly to that great Shepard who takes the Lambs in his Boſom. He greatly delights in the Virtue and Piety of Young Perſons.—When the Young Man in the Goſpel came to Him with his ſerious Enquiries about Eternal Life, Jeſus beheld him and loved him. Joſeph was beloved of his God for his early Piety, and becauſe he fear'd to Sin againſt him in Private. Moſes was honoured of God, and was taken into the neareſt and moſt intimate Acquaintance with him becauſe he deſpis'd the Pleaſures of Egypt, and choſe to ſuffer Affliction with the People of God God reveal'd himſelf to pious Samuel while he was yet a Child. Becauſe young Joſiah's Heart was tender, therefore God bro't not the Evils in his Days. Timothy was remarkable alſo for his early Piety, and he was ordain'd young a Biſhop at Epheſus.
Theſe and many more ſhining Examples might be produc'd. Look into your Bible and read them; and O that you might profit by reading them! But I cannot leave you without offering you one more, and that is the Incomparable Pattern and Example which our Lord Jeſus Chriſt has left unto Young People to Copy after: O read his Life over and over, as it is given you by the Evangeliſts, and conform your's to it as far as poſſible. Beg of him his Holy Spirit, and gracious Aſſiſtances; and he will own your Endeavours and accept you. O how does God delight in the Bloſſoms of his Gardens! Their Scent is fragrant in his Noſtrils!
O My Dear, let me beg of you not to ſpend any part of your precious Time in reading Romances or idle Poems, which tend only to raiſe falſe Ideas and impure Images in the Mind, and leave a vile Tincture upon it.
Flee Youthful Luſts; and follow after Holineſs without which no Man ſhall ſee the Lord. Let it be your conſtant Care to begin and end every Day with ſecret Prayer to God; and reading a Portion of the Holy Scriptures. Be deligent at Work, eat not the Bread of Idleneſs. Have reſpect to all God's Commandments. Never dare to profane God's Name, or Sabbath. Be dutiful and ſhew all Reverence to your Parents. O remember the Fifth Commandment; ſtudy the Promiſes and Threatnings of it. Put away all Childiſh things. Behave your ſelf Womanly, and like a Chriſtian to all with whom you converſe. Indulge not a paſſionate or fretful Temper; much leſs a haughty or inſulting Carriage towards the meaneſt Servant in the Family. Be obliging, and modeſt, and humble, ſo ſhall you deſerve and have the Eſteem of every Body. Hearken to Inſtruction, and let your Ears be open to Reproof. Be thankful to and pray for them that are ſo kind as to admoniſh you. Be contented with your Lot; wiſh not your ſelf in another's Place, or that you had another's Liberty. There are but Few in Town favour'd on all Accounts as you are: think ſo, and bleſs God for diſtinguiſhing you.—I have many more things to ſay when I ſee you. So earneſtly beſeeching you to turn to the Lord, in and thro' Jeſus Chriſt; to the keeping of whoſe Grace I commend both your Soul and mine.
I am your loving Siſter.
This Letter was too good to be overlook'd by her Father; I find him preſently making the following moſt juſt, and yet moſt obliging Return for it.
Decemb. 21. 1727. My Dear Child,
NAbby has your dear Letter, ſhe thanks you for it; your Mother and I do ſo more. We love you more than ever. We prize it beyond an Ingot of Gold. It is more precious than Rubies, an Ornament of Grace, and better than Chains for the Neck. Your Siſter can't read it for Tears: may it enter deep into her Heart. You have done a Siſter's part, and acted like One converted to God, deſiring to carry your only & younger Siſter with you. You have amaſs'd the moſt excellent Rules for her, with the ſtrongeſt Motives, and put them in the beſt order. Your Letter is worthy to be printed in Types of Gold. Such is your Father's Eſteem of it! What then think you is his Joy in you for writing of it? —Go on, my Deareſt, in your Care for your own Soul, and the Souls of your dear Relatives. Continue your tender Solicitude for your dear Siſter. God make her a Bleſſing to you and your Crown; as You are to us.— When God gives you Children, as I hope he will, take ſuch Care of them, more and better than We have of you; and may the Bleſſing of Abraham be on them.— And now my Dear, live joyfully with him thou loveſt, the tendereſt of Husbands; and go gladly with him toward Heaven; be help'd by him along and be helpful to him. Your Mother is melted with your Letter, and ſends you a thouſand Loves.
Your loving Father.
I have ſeveral more Letters to ſhow, which ſhe wrote me from Boſton in the Year 1729, in equal Strains of Piety. A Paragraph or two ſhall be offered.
— I commit my Self and my Caſe into the Hands of a wiſe and gracious God, who knows what is beſt for me; and who will order all things for the beſt. O may I continue in this Faith and Prayer, and ſo be prepar'd for the great Deliverances I ſtand in need of, both for Soul and Body.
Again,
I thank you for your good Advice and Counſels, and pray I may have Grace given me to practice agreably. I have had large Experience of the Goodneſs of God in my former Travails, as well as thro' my whole Life, He is the ſame God, and the ſame to me: His Arm is not ſhortned, and I daily experience his Power and Goodneſs in preſerving both the Tree and Fruit; I therefore will truſt in Him. Let me always have your Prayers and Counſels. I take leave commending you to the Care and Keeping of God's Grace and Providence, praying him to watch over us while we are apart, to cauſe us to rejoyce together in this World, but eſpecially in a better.
Your loving dutiful Wife.
Here follows a remarkable One ſhe wrote me from her Chamber.
My Dear,
YOU muſt forgive my Infirmity in not uttering my Griefs to day. I tho't you might have gueſs'd the State of my Mind by my Countenance. I am under great Fears and Doubts, about my Eternal Welfare, and my Soul is exceeding heavy. My Sins ſtare me in the Face, my Guilt confounds me. I have ſinned againſt ſuch clear Light and ſo many Mercies, that I am aſham'd and bluſh to lift up my Face to God.— One particular that grieves me to Day is my being over merry in Company the laſt Night.— Another, that I can't p…ay without the utmoſt Confuſedneſs. When I riſe from my Knees I tremble for fear I have enhanced my Guilt; and that Scripture d…eſſes me,— The Prayers of the Wicked are an Abomination to the Lord: Yet I follow after God in the Dark, and hope he will be found of me, and be better to me than my Fears. What ſhall I do? tell me freely, and reſolve me quickly.
Your diſtreſs'd Wife.
Upon the Receipt of this Script I obſerved unto her, that it was truly an Infirmity, and a very faulty one, to hide her Griefs; it being no other than a piece of Cruelty upon her ſelf, and aggravated, in as much as ſhe had many a time found Relief by laying them open to her Friends. — That God only knows the Hearts of all the Children of Men, and that the C…untenance is a moſt uncertain Rule for any to gueſs the State of a Perſon by.— As to her Fears and Doubts about her Eternal Welfare founded on the Greatneſs of her Sins, I told her ſhe well knew it was as eaſy for infinite Power and Mercy and Grace to ſave from many Sins as from few, from great as from ſmall; that the Promiſe of Pardon was made to true Penitents let the Degree of their Guilt be what it would. — That the particular ſhe mention'd, of being over merry in Company, prov'd nothing againſt her. Her Heart's troubling her for it was like David's Heart's ſmiting him for cutting off Saul's skirt, which for any thing that appears in Scripture, proceeded from meer Tenderneſs of Conſcience, a Fear leaſt ſomething might be amiſs.—That her not being able to pray with deſir'd Compoſure and Affection muſt not be tho't to affect her State. Her preſent unhappy Frame might proceed from bodily Indiſpoſition, natural & not moral Cauſes, which is oftner the Occaſion of ſuch Frames in God's People than moſt are ſenſible of; and that ſhe ought not to draw up C…ncluſions about her State either from the Ebb or Flow of her Affections, but from the Bent and Sincerity of her Heart, and Courſe of her Life. — That her Fears about her Prayers being an Abomination were ill-grounded; for more was intended by Wicked in that Scripture then ſhe imagin'd; and I hardly thought ſhe would own her Self the reſolved Sinner, delighting in Sin and committing it with Greedineſs: Nay that ſhe prov'd the contrary by what ſhe added of her following God in the Dark, and hoping in him —Upon the whole, I led her to Chriſt the true Light, and told her, tho' Grief endureth for a Night, yet Joy would come in the Morning: For they that ſow in ſuch Tears of Humiliation and Repentance, will anon reap the Joys of Aſſurance.
I now repair to her Diary, which filled much faſter after Marriage than before: wherein ſhe takes notice of God's Providences to her Self, her Friends, and the Land in general.
There is in it the Covenant, in Mr. Alleine's Form, ſolemnly Subſcrib'd with her Hand, and often Renew'd on Sacramental and other Occaſions.
It is not very eaſy to methodize a Chriſtian's Diary, and place every thing under diſtinct and proper Heads. In her Books there is notice taken of Theſe among other Things.