A Scripture-Map of the Wilderness of Sin, Treatise · Part 2 · Chapter 20
CHAP. XX. Contains the ſecond kind of bewildring darkeneſſe in converſion. viz. relating to God in foure particulars removed.
BUt ſecondly,2d. Kind, ſuch as relate unto God. There are attending upon converſion bewildring darkneſſes, as relating to God, Dark thoughts concerning the Purpoſes, the Thoughts, the Providences, the Juſtice and mercy of God towards us.
1.1. Darkneſſe as to Gods purpoſes. Such a day many times bewildes poore ſoules in dark thoughts concerning Gods purpoſes about themſelves. Oh! ſaith many a ſoule, I ſhould be glad to pray, to repent, to believe, to do any thing for God; but I am a Reprobate, I know God hath from all eternity caſt me away, and therefore it is in vaine for me to doe any thing, but (as my deſerved portion is) everlaſtingly to deſpair.
Here is the blackneſſe of darkneſs indeed; but who told thee that thou are a Reprobate? Why? I am ſure I am a Reprobate. But why doſt thou think that Gods eternall purpoſe was to paſs thee by? Why? I am ſure I am a Reprobate.
My Brethren, I know it is the great duty of every Saint, to give all diligence to make their calling and election ſure, and ſo ſaith the Apoſtle, 2 Pet. 1.16. We ought to make ſure, (that is, be aſſured of) our election, ſo that we might conclude it, and comfortably aſſert from our Calling; that is, becauſe we find that we are converted, to reſt aſſured that we were elected, becauſe called, therefore that we were choſen of God. But ther's no Scripture, that either bids or warrants us, to make our Reprobation ſure; that is, to ſtand aſſured that we are reprobated, no not becauſe we are unconverted. You'l ſay, the Apoſtle bids us to examine our ſelves upon ſuch terms, 2 Cor. 13.5. Know ye not your ſelves, how that Jeſus Chriſt is in you, except you be Reprobates? the word i… foreign. Why? Jeſus Chriſt is not in me, therefore I am a Reprobate. Is this thine argument? truly then thou muſt alſo ſay, that there was a time when Paul was a Reprobate (that ſpake it) for there was a time when Chriſt was not in Paul: Yea, that the Saints that are in heaven were once Reprobates; for certaine it is, that they were once Chriſtleſs: and if this be ſo, then to be Reprobate is no more then to unconverted; and if this be thy meaning, why ſhould'ſt thou deſpaire upon the thoughts that thou art a Reprobate? for though thou be Chriſtleſs, and by ſuch reaſoning a Reprobate to day, as Paul before Converſion, yet maiſt thou bee ſaved as well as he, and ſo reprobation ſhall no more hinder thy ſalvation, then unconverſion. But it is evident from the dark deſpaire, that reſts upon their ſpirits unto whom I ſpeake, that conclude they cannot be ſaved, becauſe (as they thinke) they are Reprobates, that they are not ſo criticall as to diſtinguiſh betwixt Reprobate as oppoſed to Elect, and oppoſite to Gods preſent approbation, which an Elect (but unconverted) perſon may not have: but take Reprobate in the ſaddeſt ſence, in which I cannot apprehend how any with reaſon, can make unconverſion an aſſuring token of it: onelyonly glad they are (poor ſouls) to take up any ſtaffe wherewith to beat themſelves. I ſhall therefore in a word, tell you what I think from theſe two Scriptures that I have mentioned.
1. That ſouls that have Chriſt and are converted, may from thence be ſure that they are elected: but yet that it doth not hence follow, that ſouls that are yet Chriſtleſs, and unconverted as yet, are reprobated. But yet
Againe, (ſo much I preſume the ſecond Scripture ſpeaks) that no ſoul can come to ſay, I am not reprobate, I know I am not, but by being able to ſay, Chriſt is in me: although another ſoule may not ſay, becauſe Chriſt is not in me, therefore I am a Reprobate: Chriſt is in me, therefore I am no Reprobate, that Scripture concludes undoubtedly true Chriſt is not in me, therefore I am a Reprobate, that Scripture concludes not, neither can it ſo conclude, for it is a lie: ſinners in hell may ſay, we are all Reprobates, therefore Chriſt is not in us: ſinners upon Earth may not ſay, Chriſt is not in us, therefore we are all Reprobates; for though Chriſt be not in you to day, who can, or dare ſay, but that God may convert you to morrow?
I ſhall illuſtrate the whole of this,2. Simile. by a ſimilitude obvious to you. You have in your Town an hundred ſhifts by a Benefactors will, to be dealt forth to an hundred poor men and women, whom the Truſtees ſhall chooſe out of all the poor. They are choſen before the Dole, which is to be at twice, and in two ſeverall places, ſome to be diſtributed in the fore-noon, at one place of concourſe; ſome in the after-noon at another: the man or woman that receives in the forenoon, may reſt aſſured, that he or ſhe was elected or choſen, becauſe they have received; but he that ſtands by and receives not, cannot reſt aſſured, or be ſure, that he is not elected, becauſe although he receives not then, yet he may in the afternoon. Sinners that are timouſly converted, may be ſure they were elected, becauſe they have received the gift of God: But ſinners that are yet unconverted, I grant, they have abundant reaſon to queſtion, whether they be elected or no, and a great deal of reaon to fear, leſt God ſhould call them Reprobate ſilver, but they cannot be ſure, they may not conclude that they are Reprobate, becauſe God may at the eleventh hour ſend them into the Vineyard. Though hee that receives not in the forenoon, may fear he is not choſen; yet he may not conclude, ſo as to neglect to wait in the afternoon, it may be he may then receive. Unconverted ones have reaſon to fear, that they are unelected ones: and let this to purpoſe humble them, but let them not ſo wretchedly conclude as to deſpair, and ſo as to neglect the afternoones dole: yea, ſurely they ſhould be the more humbly ſolicitous, becauſe there is but one part of the day to deal in, and if that be over, and Chriſt the gift of God not received, they may then conclude they were reprobated; but whilſt they are yet on this ſide Hell, let them return to God, for who knows, but God may return to them, and leave a bleſſing behind him, Jon. 3.9: So then my concluſion is, that whatever thy Converſation hath been, it is not for thee to conclude (if now thine heart be in any meaſure inclined towards God) that thou art a Reprobate, onelyonly let prophane and impenitent ones know, that I ſpeak to poor diſtracted Conſciences this day. Your arguments are ſuch as theſe.
Object. 1 1. The greatneſs of your ſins in themſelves. Oh ſai'ſt thou, Never were ſuch great ſins committed by any elect, therefore I am a Reprobate
Anſ. I do ſeriouſly believe, that if Davids murther with Adultery, and Peters deniall had been committed by thee, thou wouldſt have thought (as I believe they did) that they were the greateſt ſins in the world; yea, greater than thoſe very ſins that thou argueſt thy reprobation from. But this is no argument, for they were the elect of God.
Object. 2 2. Oh! but my ſin hath been againſt light of Conſcience, againſt profeſſion of God, againſt vowes, and Covenants &c. my ſins admit of all manner of aggravations, therefore I am a reprobate.
Anſ. Read the entire ſtories of David, and Peter, and if thou maiſt not unfeignedly judge, that if thou hadſt been the aggravator of their ſins, as thou art of thine own, thou wouldeſt have ſpoken as bitter things of their ſins, as thou now doſt of thine own, and found as ſad circumſtances whereby to heighten them, ſuppoſing them thine: then (I had almoſt ſaid) be diſconſolate ſtill.
Thirdly, Oh but mine whole Converſation hath been a very Object. 3 trade of ſinning, I have done evills over and over, again and again, even as I could, with both hands greedily, even unto this end of my dayes; and now I am juſt agoing out of the world, and therefore I am a Reprobate.
Anſ. I confeſſe this is very ſad indeed, but yet I muſt ſay, Here is not enough in the premiſes whence to infer the concluſion. For the Thiefe, Luk. 23. was a Thiefe to his dying day, whoſe whole trade was to ſin, he lived upon it, and no queſtion uſed both hands in it, delighted in it, and which is ſad; 'tis ſaid, that both the Thieves (at firſt) reviled Chriſt, and caſt the blaſphemous reproaches of the wicked multitude into Chriſts teeth, Mat. 27.44. And this was the very day that the Thiefe (that was ſaved) went to be hanged, ſo Mark 15.32. And yet this Thiefe preſently falls a reproving the other, condemning himſelfe, juſtifying Chriſt, praying unto Chriſt, believing in Chriſt, and ſaith Chriſt unto him, Verily this day thou ſhalt be with me in Paradice, Luk. 23.39, 40, 41, 42, 43. Therefore he was Elected, and therefore thou canſt not hence conclude, that thou art a Reprobate, as oppoſite to Elect; for foreign is ſometimes to be taken for one that is as yet unſound, though he may be elect.
But to cloſe this: I pray you, who are the reprobates that I am now ſpeaking to? even ſuch as I could wiſh the moſt of you that hear me this day were, if they be not already ſuch, even ſuch as Job was, Chap. 27.2. The almighty hath taken away my judgement, ſaith he, that is, God hath rejected me, he will have nothing at all to doe with me, and yet ver. 3.4, 5. he ſaith againe, All the while my breath is in me, my tongue ſhall not utter deceit, nor my lips ſpeake wickedly: I will hold mine integrity until I die. My brethren, they are ſuch among you, that fear the Lord, and obey the voyce of his ſervants, that walk in this darkneſſe and ſee no light, Iſa. 50.10. I remember once I was in diſcourſe with a poore woman, whoſe whole complaint againſt her ſelfe was in concluſion this; that ſhe was a Reprobate: I perceived much good in the womans ſpirit, yet this was at the end of all: I asked her why ſhe concluded ſo hardly againſt God, and her ſelfe, that whatever God had done as to others (whoſe mercy to others ſhe was wrapt up in the admiration of) God had caſt her away? I asked her if ſhe were reſolved to harbour ſin, and to hold her iniquity till ſhe ſhould die, that ſhe did ſo determine, that ſhe was a Reprobate? The poor heart brake out into a paſſion of tears, and ſaid, Oh! no, I had rather be damned with holineſſe, then carry ſin to heaven with me; for, God knows, I hate it with a perfect hatred: Theſe are the ſouls I ſpeake unto, that are under this bewildring temptation, becauſe of their darkneſs in reſpect of the purpoſes of God, of whom I am bold to conclude, that though they bee their own Reprobates, yet are they none of Gods.
2ly, Darkneſs as to Gods thoughts.2ly, They are bewildred in exceeding much darkneſſe, as to the thoughts of Gods heart toward them. You know in generall, we are very apt to meaſure every ones thoughts by our own. The proud Spirit wonders that every one doth not think him worthy of that reſpect, that he thinks himſelfe worthy of: and again the lowly Spirit that thinkes meanly of himſelfe, wonders that any one ſhould think better of him, then he doth of himſelfe; that any Godly Miniſter or Chriſtian ſhould think well, or ſpeak well of him, when he cannot beſtow a good thought upon himſelfe; and indeed whatever it be that we have taken up a ſtrong perſwaſion of, we admire that every one thinks not as we thinke. Now when once poore ſoules come to harbour thoſe ſad thoughts, that I have ſpoken of againſt themſelves, they are much in the dark concerning Gods thoughts, being wholly diſpoſed to meaſure Gods thoughts by their own. When a Miniſter brings them a comfortable word, they cannot be perſwaded that God is of that mind, becauſe they are not of that mind. When David brings lame creeple Mephiboſheth to eat bread at his own table, 2 Sam. 9.7. He can't be perſwaded that he means as he ſaith, that he ſhould eat bread alwaies there, ver. 8. What is thy ſervant, that thou ſhouldeſt looke on ſuch a dead Dog as I am. What? would you make me believe, that God hath any thoughts of ſaving ſuch a dead ſoule as I am? ſuch a ſinner? how can it be? I know mine owne thoughts, that I would never find in mine heart to do ſuch a thing for ſuch an Enemy of mine, and of my good, as I have been unto God, and unto his glory: therefore I can never thinke it. I thinke if I were as judge, I ſhould undoubtedly damne ſuch an one as my ſelfe is, and therefore let me alone: God can have no thoughts of good concerning me.
Now hold a little, whileſt we read Iſai. 55.7. 8…. Let the wicked forſake his waies. Why? what ſhall he get by that, is there any hope of good for a wicked man? Yes, God will have mercy upon him. Yea, but ſaith thy ſoule, not upon ſuch a grievous ſinner as I am: yes, God will abundantly pardon. Do you ſay ſo? O but I can never think that. Yea, but friend, that's an unrighteous thought, and you muſt forſake it: Let the unrighteous forſake his thoughts. Forſake it, why? ver. 8. For (ſaith God) My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your waies my waies: but as the heavens are higher then the earth, ſo are my waies then your waies, and my thoughts higher then your thoughts, ver. 9. So that it is a bewildring darkneſs for thy poor heart to conclude, that God thinks no thoughts of peace towards thee, becauſe thou canſt not think thy ſoul worthy of that peace, &c. For ſaith God, I know the thoughts that I think towards you, thoughts of peace, Jer. 29.11.
3ly, Poor ſouls in ſuch a day,3ly, Darkneſs as to Gods providence. are much in the dark as to Gods providential diſpenſations. Oh! ſaith the ſoul, if God intended to pardon me in the end, he would never thus long keep me upon the rack: if God intended to ſave me in the Concluſion, he would never ſuffer Satan thus to buffet me, unbeliefe to have ſo much power over me, temptations to blaſphemous thoughts, and deſpairing words thus far to prevaile againſt me, &c. Therefore doth Eliphaz ſinfully and uncharitably, conclude concerning good Job, Jo. 22.5. &c. That his wickedneſſe was great, and his iniquities infinite, &c. becauſe ver. 20.11. That ſnares were round about him, and darkneſs that he could not ſee, &c. And thus think poor ſouls of themſelves, that becauſe they are under darker diſpenſations (as they think) then any others, that therefore their ſins are greater, and their conditions more deſperate then any others. Now this is darkneſs: for this is to judge according to the appearance, and not with righteous judgement. Thus though God had brought comforts to Zion, and tels her, that he will have mercy upon his afflicted, Iſa. 49.13. Yet (becauſe ſhe was afflicted) verſe 14. Sion ſaid, the Lord hath forſaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten me. He would never have ſtaid ſo long, ſaith the ſoul but that he hath quite forgotten me, he would …ever have ſerved me ſo and ſo, but that he hath quite forſaken me. Now how much darkneſſe there is in this kind of arguing, you may eaſily ſee in the next verſes: though a Mother forget her Child (and can that be?) yet I will not forget thee, ſaith the Lord) for thou art graven upon the palms of mine hands, verſes 15.16.
4ly, Darkneſs as to Gods juſtice and mercy.4ly, They have exceeding darkneſs upon their thoughts, as to the juſtice and mercy of God, and hereby they are alſo bewildred. They (poor Creatures) can not think but that God is more inclined to juſtice, then to mercy towards them; and here ſtill they judge according to fleſh & blood. Indeed fleſh and blood ſaith, it is the glory of a man to revenge himſelfe upon them that have wronged him; but the Spirit ſaith, It is the glorie of a man to paſs by an infirmitie. Now this they cannot but judge, that God will have more glory in damning them, then in ſaving them; therefore they conclude that they ſhall be damned: juſtice muſt paſſe upon them.
Now ſuch thoughts are very darkneſſe, for verily neither is Gods delight ſo much in, nor his glory ſo much advanced, by taking of revenge upon his Enemies (though vengeance be his, and he will repay) as in ſhewing mercy unto poore ſouls.
1. God delights moſt in mercy.1. Scripture ſeems to hold forth, that there is nothing ſo much of Gods heart in puniſhing, as in pardoning, as is cleare in thoſe two known Scriptures, Iſa. 28.21. Where judgement is called his work, but his ſtrange work: his act, but his ſtrange act, as if he did not know how to goe about it. How ſhall I give thee up Ephraim? &c. but Mich. 7.18. God pardoneth iniquity, and paſſeth by tranſgreſſion, becauſe he delighteth in mercy: he delighteth in mercy, in the worke of pardoning ſin, in the act of paſſing by tranſgreſſion, as if hee knew not how to go about any other work: how dark then are thy thoughts that perſwade thee, that it will pleaſe God better to damn thee, then to ſave thee.
2ly, The exerting of pardoning grace, 2ly, Gods glory is moſt in mercy.ſets the brighteſt crown of glory upon the head of the Almighty, Exo. 33.18. Moſes begs of God, I beſeech thee ſhew me thy glory: and how doth God anſwer his prayer herein? why ver. 19. I will make all my goodneſs paſs before thee, and I will proclaime … name of the Lord before thee, and will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will ſhew mercy to whom I will ſhew mercy; this is Gods name, and his glory. If this then be the darkneſs wherein thou haſt walked, that God will have moſt glory in damning thee, take hold upon this name of the Lord, and ſtay thy ſelfe upon him as thy God.