A Treatise of Family Instruction, Chapter 3 · Section 19
SECT. 19. The neceſſity of joyning Prayer with Family-Inſtruction: The Caſe of ſuch as have prayed long for their Childrens Converſion, and ſee no anſwer of their prayers, conſidered.
Direct. 19 IF you would carry on the work of Family-Inſtruction ſucceſsfully, ſo as to convert, edifie, and ſave their Souls which are under your Charge, you muſt pray with, and pray for your Families: you muſt pray often, and earneſtly to God in the Name of Jeſus Chriſt, for guidance, aſſiſtance, and ſucceſs, in the management of this work. When the Apoſtles gave themſelves to prayer, and the miniſtry of the Word, great multitudes were converted to the Faith, Act. 6.4, 7. We will give our ſelves continually to prayer, and to the Miniſtry of the Word: And what followed hereupon? The Word of God increaſed, and the number of the Diſciples multiplied in Jeruſalem greatly, and a great company of the Prieſts were obedient to the faith.
To ſtir you up to give your ſelves unto prayer for aſſiſtance and ſucceſs in this work: Conſider,
1. All your ſufficiency for the right performing of this work, is of God: 2 Cor. 2.16. Who is ſufficient for theſe things? 2 Cor. 3.5. Not that we are ſufficient of our ſelves to think any thing as of our ſelves, but our ſufficiency is of God. And as our ſufficiency for this work, ſo our ſucceſs in it is from God, 1 Cor. 3.6. I have planted, Apollo watered, but God gave the increaſe. Paul was an able Miniſter of the New Teſtament, 2 Cor. 3.6. and Apollo was an eloquent man mighty in the Scriptures, Act. 18.24. yet neither Paul's Abilities, nor Apollo's Eloquence could convert or edifie any, but where God gave a bleſſing to their Labours.
2. Conſider how the Servants of Chriſt who have been Teachers of others, have longed and laboured with God in prayer night and day, for the converſion, edification and ſalvation of thoſe that have been committed to their Care and Charge: Phil. 1.8. God is my record, how greatly I long after you all in the bowels of Jeſus Chriſt. The Apoſtle had a longing deſire after the ſanctification and ſalvation of the Philippians; He did not only long, but longed greatly, not after ſome, or moſt of them, but after them all, and that in the bowels of Chriſt; that is, with ſuch earneſt and ardent deſires as Jeſus Chriſt hath towards the converſion of Sinners, and their eternal ſalvation; or, In the Bowels of Chriſt Jeſus, may ſignifie thoſe bowels, that tender and ardent affection which Jeſus Chriſt had implanted in his ſoul: And what was it that the Apoſtle did thus long for on their behalf? It was, that their love might abound more and more, in knowledge, and in all judgment, that they might approve the things that are excellent, that they might be ſincere and without offence till the day of Chriſt, that they might be filled with the fruits of Righteouſneſs which are by Jeſus Chriſt, unto the glory and praiſe of God, ver. 9.10, 11. How earneſtly did the Apoſtle thirſt after the converſion of the Galatians, Gal. 4.9. My little Children, of whom I travail in birth again, until Chriſt be formed in you: As it is with a travailing woman, ſhe is full of ſorrow and heavineſs, and cries out, and is pained, till ſhe be delivered: John 16.21. A woman when ſhe is in travail hath ſorrow: Rev. 12.2. She being with Child cried, travelling in Birth, and pained to be delivered. So it was with the Apoſtle, he wept, he cried out, he was pained, he could not be at eaſe untill Chriſt was formed in their hearts. This is a good pattern for Parents to follow, as ſoon as God hath given them Children, they ſhould travel in birth again, till Chriſt be formed in their Childrens hearts. The Apoſtle was ſo affectionately deſirous of the Theſſalonians welfare, that he could have imparted his own Soul to them: 1 Theſ. 2.7, 8. We were gentle among you, even as a Nurſe cheriſheth her Children, ſo being affectionately deſirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you not the Goſpel of God only, but alſo our own Souls, becauſe ye were dear unto us. And as the Apoſtle did earneſtly long after their welfare whom he inſtructed, ſo he prayed exceedingly for them night and day; 1 Theſ. 3.10. Night and day praying exceedingly that we might ſee your face, and perfect that which is lacking in your Faith: Phil. 1.4. Always in every prayer of mine making requeſt for you all with Joy: He put up no prayer at any time, but he remembred them all; and it was not irkſome to him ſo to do, but he did it with Joy.
And as the Apoſtle Paul, ſo alſo others of the Servants of Chriſt have been wont to labour and ſtrive mightily with God in Prayer for thoſe whom they have taught and inſtructed in the ways of God, Col. 4.12. Epaphras, who is one of you, a Servant of Chriſt, ſaluteth you, always labouring fervently for you in prayers, that ye may ſtand perfect and compleat in the whole Will of God. He did not only pray, but laboured in prayer, and that fervently, not ſometimes, but always; and that not for his own concernments, but for you: beſides, it is not ſaid in prayer, but in prayers; intimating that he put up a multitude of prayers for them; and it was no ſmall meaſure of grace that he laboured thus earneſtly for on their behalf, but that they might ſtand perfect and compleat in the will, in all the will of God.
3. Prayer will do great things with God for others, as well as our own Souls; Jam. 5.16. Pray one for another that ye may be healed; the effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. By praying in faith, and with fervency, we may obtain converting grace, remiſſion of ſins, and eternal life, for our Children and Servants, and others, as well as thoſe of our own Families, 1 John 5.16. If any man ſee his Brother ſin a ſin which is not unto death, he ſhall ask, and he ſhall give him life for them that ſin not unto death. This promiſe may give us great encouragement to pray in faith for the converſion and ſalvation of ſuch as are viſible and open ſinners. If any ſee his Brother ſin, &c. If we conſider,
1. The perſons to whom this promiſe is made, and they are every one that believeth in the Name of Jeſus Chriſt: It is not a priviledge that did belong only to the Apoſtles, or extraordinary men of God; but it is ſaid, If any man—that is, any man that believeth in Chriſt, as appeareth from the thirteenth verſe.
2. The perſons for whom Believers may obtain Life and Salvation upon praving to God for them, and they are his Brethren, ſinning Brethren, If any man ſee his Brother ſin,—he ſhall give him life for them— He firſt ſpeaks of a Brother in the ſingular number, and then ſaith, Life for them, in the plural, which ſhews that the word Brother is to be taken collectively (as Beza obſerves) for all or any Brother for whom a Believer ſhall pray to God. If you ask, Who is meant by a Brother? I anſwer: The Apoſtle ſeemeth to uſe the word Brother in this Epiſtle in the ſame latitude with Neighbour, which may be proved from ſeveral paſſages in his Epiſtle, as Chap. iii. 14, 15, 16. Chap. iv. 20.21. And Piſcator expounds the word Brother, Fratris nomine intelligit proximum, qui eandem nobiſcum fidem ac proinde eundem in coelis patrem profitetur.
3. He excepts no ſins but the ſin unto death; that is, as moſt expound the place, the ſin againſt the Holy Gaoſt, which is a ſin that ſhall never have forgiveneſſ: As for any other ſins, if Believers ask of God Repentance and Forgiveneſs of ſins for them that have ſinned, that ſo they may have Life and Salvation, God will grant them their deſire.
Another Scripture that ſheweth the efficacy of prayer, in order to the obtaining for others forgiveneſs of ſins, and Grace whereby they may be qualified to receive forgiveneſs of ſins, we have Jam. 5.15. The prayer of faith ſhall ſave the Sick, and the Lord ſhall raiſe him up; and if he have committed ſins they ſhall be forgiven him. Iſhmael was a wild Child, Gen. 16.11, 12. yet when Abraham prayed, Gen. 17.10. O that Iſhmael might live before thee! God anſwers him, verſe 20. As for Iſhmael I have heard thee: And though the Lord adds afterward, But my Covenant will I eſtabliſh with Iſaac; Yet this, as Rivet obſerves, ſeems rather to be an excluding of Iſhmael's Poſterity, than his Perſon, from the Covenant; unto whom, the ſame day that God gave him this anſwer, Abraham adminiſters Circumciſion, the Seal of the Covenant. When the woman of Canaans Daughter was grievouſly vexed with a Devil, her prayer prevailed with Chriſt to deliver her Daughter from the power of the Devil, Matth. 15.22, 28.
Objection.
I have prayed often to God to give my Children Grace, and to convert and turn them from their ſins; but I do not ſee that my Prayers avail any thing with God for my Children, they abide ſtill in a graceleſs condition.
Anſwer.
1. Do you inſtruct them diligently, as well as pray for them? Do you watch over them? Do you ſhew them a good example? Do you reprove them? Do you give them due correction? If you do not uſe other means as well as prayer, poſſibly that is the reaſon why your prayers avail not for their converſion. The Apoſtle Paul who earneſtly deſired and prayed for the ſalvation of the Jews, Rom. 10.1. Brethren, my hearts deſire and prayer to God for Iſrael is, that they might be ſaved; joyned with his prayers the uſe of all means to effect their ſalvation; Rom. 11.14. If by any means I might provoke to emulation them which are my fleſh, and might ſave ſome of them. So muſt we joyn the uſe of all other means with prayer, if we would have our prayers become effectual for the converſion and ſalvation of our Children.
2. Though we ſee no preſent return of our prayers, yet we ſhould continue praying, and not faint or be diſcouraged, until we have obtained what we pray for: Luke 18.1. He ſpake a Parable unto them, to this end, that men ought always to pray, and not to faint. Though the Lord may be ſilent for a ſeaſon, and ſeem not to regard our Prayers, to try our Faith and Patience, yet he may purpoſe to give us all that we pray for. He dealt thus with the Woman of Canaan, when ſhe came to him with a Requeſt on the behalf of her Daughter; at the firſt he anſwered her not a word, Matth. 15.23. And when the Diſciples intercede for her, he ſeems to diſcourage them from making any farther requeſt for her, by ſaying to them, ver. 24. I am not ſent but to the loſt ſheep of the Houſe of Iſrael; and afterward, when ſhe continued to cry after him, he ſeemeth to beat her off, and reject her prayer, by telling her, Verſe 26. It is not meet to take the Childrens Bread, and caſt it to Dogs: Yet ſhe ſtill holding on her ſuit, at length Chriſt yields her the whole deſire of her heart, Verſe 28. Then Jeſus anſwered and ſaid unto her, O Woman, great is thy Faith; Be it unto thee even as thou wilt: And her Daughter was made whole from that very hour.
3. If God ſhould not anſwer our Prayers for our Children whilſt we live, yet he may anſwer thoſe Prayers after we are dead, which we did offer up to him whilſt we lived with them. Our Lord JESUS CHRIST prayed for the Jews, that were ſo vile and wicked as to put him to death, Luke 23.34. Then ſaid Jeſus, Father forgive them, for they know not what they do. And as an anſwer of Chriſts Prayer, thouſands of thoſe Jews that were not wrought upon either by Chriſts Doctrine, or Miracles, or Godly Life, but continued in an impenitent condition till after his death; yea, were ſo hardened as to have an hand in the crucifying of the Lord Jeſus Chriſt, the Lord of Life and Glory, were notwithſtanding converted by the preaching of the Apoſtle Peter, Acts 2, 23.37, 41. Suppoſe neither your Inſtructions, nor godly Example, nor Prayers ſhould prevail for the converſion of your Children whilſt you live, but they ſhould be vile, and ſtubborn, and diſobedient to God and to you, unto your dying day; yet ceaſe not praying for them: It may be the Lord will anſwer your prayers by making uſe of others to convert them, when you are laid in your Graves.
4. We ſhould ſin againſt God, if we ſhould ceaſe praying for our Children, becauſe we ſee no effect of our Prayers, but do behold much ſtubborneſs and perverſneſs in them. The people of Iſrael were a perverſe people, Samuel ſaw little fruit of his Inſtructions or Prayers on their behalf, they were ſet upon their own way, and he could not diſſwade them from deſiring a change of Government, although therein they did not only reject Samuel, but God himſelf, from raigning over them, 1 Sam. 8.5, 6, 7, 8. yet he would not ceaſe from praying for them, leſt he ſhould ſin againſt the Lord, 1 Sam. 12.23. Moreover as for me, God forbid that I ſhould ſin againſt the Lord, in ceaſing to pray for you. If Samuel was afraid to ceaſe praying for a ſtubborn perverſe people, leſt he ſhould ſin againſt the Lord, ought not Parents to continue praying for their graceleſs and diſobedient Children, for fear if they ſhould ceaſe to pray for them, they alſo ſhould ſin againſt the Lord?
5. If you have prayed for your Childrens Converſion, and cannot prevail, joyn faſting with prayer: Sometimes mercies cannot be obtained from God, unleſs we faſt as well as pray, Mark 9.29. This kind can come forth by nothing but by Prayer and Faſting. If we have a Child that is ſick unto death, we do not ſtick at ſeeking God by Faſting and Prayer for its Recovery: 2 Sam. 12.15, 16. The Lord ſtruck the Child that Ʋriah's wife bare unto David, and it was very ſick; David therefore beſought God for the Child, and David faſted.— And ſhall we not much more ſeek to God by faſting and prayer, to recover our Children and Servants from the power of ſin and Satan, and to deliver them from everlaſting Burnings? This duty of Faſting, rightly performed, is of great uſe, both for the obtaining direction from God in the management of our undertakings, Ezra 8.21, 23. I proclaimed a Faſt—that we might afflict our ſelves before our God, to ſeek of him a right way for us, and for our little ones, and for our ſubſtance, ſo we faſted, and beſought our God for this, and he was intreated of us. And alſo for procuring of ſucceſs in what we take in hand, as we may ſee in the caſe of Eſther, Nehemiah, and ſeveral others, who ſetting upon their undertakings with faſting and prayer, proſperouſly effected what they took in hand, though their work was very great, and attended with very great difficulties. God ſeldom lets any Faſt, that is performed in a right manner, go without a remarkable Reward, Matth. 6.17, 18. And therefore it will be very much for our own and our Families advantage, to ſet apart ſome days of humiliation, with our Families, to ſeek God by faſting and prayer to bleſs and ſucceed us in this Work of Family-Inſtruction.