Sacred Therapy, Book 2 · Chapter 23
CHAP. XXIII.
Wherein is solved the doubt of a true converts regeneration, arising from some false rule applyed without reason to himself.
SOme true converts, judging their state by some false rule, do not only torment themselves, but also (so far as in them lyeth) by pronouncing false sentences of their own state, go about to extinguish the spunk of piety which is in them. The false rule whereby they do judge themselves, is strengthened by a groundlesse perswasion, that it is a true and sure rule, and ordinarily when they think or speak of it, they prefix no reason for it, but some confident asseveration, such as without doubt, it is most certain, and I am perswaded of it, and such like. If I were regenerat and truly converted, without doubt, I should be in a better disposition then I am, I should love the Lord more fervently, I should understand the mysteries of Gods Word more clearly, I should not be so little affected with the sense of Gods benefits bestowed on me, I should not go so lightly under the conviction of so many sins against God as I feel in me, I should be more diligent in the work of the Lord, in my calling I should walk more humbly and circumspectly in all my conversation, and such like many expressions. The same course doth the afflicted follow in his examination of the operations of the holy Spirit, and of every Christian vertue in himself: without doubt, saith he, if this were truly as a Christian vertue in me, there would not be such a disposition as I find in me, my condition should be such and such as became a new creature, which because I do not find in me, I have just reason to call in question my conversion. And here is a port opened for Sathan to enter at, and to throw all his fiery darts at the miserable soul of the weak convert, whence many complaints do break forth, and thanksgiving for mercies received and for the time injoyed, is broken off and ceaseth: And partly through diffidence, partly through murmuring, the Spirit of the Lord is provoked to wrath.
2. We grant, that this is a dangerous evil not only to the person afflicted, but also to such as are familiarly acquainted with his condition, because this disease readily doth infect others, as it came to passe in the camp of Israel, where the murmuring of some, set the body of the army on a mutiny against God: for, one that is weak in the faith, when he heareth such complaints in the mouth of one whom he judgeth to be holier then himself, incontinent he falleth on complaining of his own state, saying, that he hath more weighty reason to suspect the soundnesse of his conversion, then the person hath whom he hath heard suspecting his being in the state of grace.
3. Wherefore let the afflicted before he shall vent his suspicion of his state, examine the rule whereby he hath passed sentence on himself, whether he can make it good from the Scripture: for, it is not sufficient to say, without doubt, and I am perswaded it is true, except it can be confirmed by the infallible warrant of Gods Word; and let his friend who shall hear his complaint, expresly require a reason of his confidence, that such a rule is clear from Scripture, and that the application thereof is made righteously. Which if he cannot prove otherwayes then Sathan doth enforce his tentations, that is, either without Scripture, or by abusing Scripture contrary to the intent thereof, let him acknowledge his readinesse to misbelieve and disobey the Word of the Lord, and to hearken to Sathans tentations to the weakening of his own faith, and hindering of his cheerfull obedience to the Lords commands: and because such question-making of being in the state of grace, is oft-times very inconsideratly uttered, even before them who do not allow the complainers misconstruction of his state, or if they should allow it, and say to the complainer, that they believed that suspicion of his state were very just, it should grieve the complainer more then the doubt it self: Therefore let the afflicted neither hearken to the suspicion, nor vent it when it is strongly suggested; but let him humble himself before Christ, because of these defects and wants of such evidences of saving grace as he would have; and in the sense of these wants, let him cleave close to Christ for covering his nakednesse, and earnestly endeavour by faith in Christ to be made more and more conform to the examplar of holinesse holden forth in the Scripture.