Advice to Parents and Children, Part 2
Children exhorted to their Duties unto their Parents. General Duties, and Particular. Motives to both.
In Priſons and upon the Gallows, poor Miſcreants do often exclaim, that their ruin began in diſobedience unto Parents. Nor can it be doubted, but Hell rings with the ſame complaint. Hear the words of your Life, dear Children! Read ye theſe Lines, as though they had been written with the finger of God before your eyes. And you were called to by name in every Paragraph. As ſure as they are any words they are Gods word. And his word unto you; to all and every one of you. And his word deſigned and qualified to help you keep all his whole word. The fifth Command is a directory for keeping all, of both Tables.
1. Love your Parents most dearly. Honour imports Love. When Husbands are bid to give Honour to Wives as weaker Veſſels, they are bid to be tenderly affectionate towards them. All do ſo conſtrue it, 1 Pet. 3.7. And when you are bid to Honour your Parents, you are bid to Love them. And ſo Love them, as thoſe to whom you are moſt engaged next to God himſelf. You muſt love God, much more. If they put you upon any thing diſpleaſing to God, you muſt then ſhew, that in compariſon of God, you do hate them. Luke 14.26. That for Gods ſake you can forget your Fathers Houſe, leave it and be glad to be out of it. Pſal. 45.10. That in God's Cauſe, you have Levi's courage; read it, Deut. 33.9. You muſt equally Love your Mothers and Fathers. Fathers are put firſt, Exod. 19. Mothers are put firſt, Lev. 19.2. Ye ſhall fear every Man his Mother and his Father. Both muſt be Loved beſt. The Mother, is the Fathers Inferior, ſome ways; but ſhe is his equal as to their Children. She is a Parent as well as he; and much more painfully ſo. God commands that ſhe ſhould have the ſame Love as he. And the ſelf-ſame Reward is promiſed to the Love of Mothers as of Fathers, and all Duty towards them. You muſt Love your Parents conſtantly, ſincerely, and eminently. Your Father muſt not be deſpiſed when poor, nor your Mother when ſhe is old, Prov. 23.22. Nor either of them, when they rebuke you for ſin. Pro. 29. Your Love muſt be pure, and not mercenary for gain from them. As Abſolom's was, for all his Flattery, 2 Sam. 14. And it muſt be eminent. 'Tis unnatural to Love a Father or Mother no more than we Love the moſt beneficial of our Friends in the World. Nature and Juſtice give Parents the Preheminence.
2. Honour your Parents moſt highly. Next unto God, moſt highly. In your Thoughts, Words, and Behaviours, Honour them. Fear to think an ill thought of them. Their faults forget and cover, this is praiſeworthy. Shem and Japheth, are Bleſſed, and Cain's poſterity Curſed. Gen. 9.22. to 28. Let every Speech unto your Parents be expreſly Reverent. Rachel's to Laban was ſo, Let not my Lord be diſpleaſed. Gen 31.35. 'Tis unnatural when it is not ſo. Mal. 1.6. A Son honoureth his Father: that is, naturally Sons do. Break a bone as ſoon as omit to bow it to your Parents. Irreverent geſtures of body are wicked, moſt ſcandalouſly. Solomon bowed to his Mother. 1 Kings 2.19. Joſeph bowed himſelf with his Face to the Earth, unto his Father; Gen. 41.12. Where I ſee not this threefold Reverence in you to your Parents, I cannot think you other than ignorant deſpiſers of God and your Parents.
3. Obey your Parents moſt abſolutely. I mean, in the Lord, as the Scripture ſpeaks. Where God forbids not, do what they bid you, and becauſe they bid you: though it be againſt your own minds and wills. For this is God's moſt Wiſe and Holy Will. Col. 3.10. Children obey your Parents in all things, for this is well-pleaſing unto the Lord. Where is the honour required in the Fifth Commandment without this? Read Prov. 13.1. Prov. 1.8, 9. Prov. 30.17. Children, Rebecca and Rachel kept Sheep at their Parents command. Gen. 24. Gen. 29. Jeſus. Chriſt himſelf was ſubject to Joſeph and Mary in their mean employment. Luke 2.57. Matt. 13.15. How wonderoufly yielded Iſaac to Abraham, ſee Gen. 22.9.10. And the Rechabites to their Father, Jer. 35.5, 6, 7, to v. 11. He that ſays, I will not do what my Parents would have me, he therein ſaith alſo, I will not do what God would have me. Unleſs he can ſay, therefore do I diſobey my Parents becauſe I ſhould otherwiſe ſin againſt God. A good Childs heart ſpeaks thus: Whatever I can do without ſin, let my Parents command, and ſpare not.
4. Requite your Parents moſt Zealouſly. 1. Tim. 5.4. Let them learn with Piety at home, to requite their Parents: for that is good and acceptable toward God. The Honour in the Fifth Commandment includes Recompence; which is called Honour, Numb 22.37. 1 Tim. 5.17. Children, had you Kingdoms to give your Parents, they would not pay your Debt unto them. You muſt all your lives long be paying of it; you will never have paid the ſum total. Never come out of your Parents debt. Therefore, always, according to their needs and your abilities, you muſt be paying your Thank-Offerings. A Child is a ſervant. Mal. 3.17. As thee his ſon that ſerveth him. Phil. 2.22. As a ſon with the Father hath he ſerved with me. You muſt ever promptly ſerve them to your power, in every innocent matter. And if they fall into want, you muſt ſupply them readily as ever they ſupplied you; and as liberally; and more richly too, if you are able. You muſt in many caſes, ſpare from your ſelves to give them. Yea you muſt lay out the leſs upon the Worſhip of God too, to beſtow on them. To withdraw from Parents, even for God's Worſhip, was an abominable fault of the Phariſees, condemned by our Saviour, Mark 7.9, 10, 11, 12, 13. In a word; 'tis not enough if you do nothing to grieve your Parents. You ſin, if you omit any thing in the power of your hands to comfort them; and to make their Loyns bleſs you. Bleſſed are the Joſephs that nouriſh their Parents and Brethren! Gen. 47.12.
5. Behave your ſelves ſo, that you may be high Honours unto your Parents. I mean, ſo Holily toward God, ſo Righteouſly toward Men, ſo Temperately toward your ſelves. So as may make for the Honour of your Parents. The Honour of their granted prayers and their bleſſed pains took for you. So as may make both Town and Countrey have your Parents in more Notice and Reputation for you. This Counſel comprehends all. O what a World ſhould we have, if it were followed? Children come on and begin and ſet to mend this World. You cannot doubt but this my Counſel is certainly commanded in the Fifth Commandment. You muſt needs know, he cannot Honour his Father and Mother, that is a reproach and ſhame to them. Whoſe whole life caſts diſgrace on their Perſons, Families, and Names. Yet ſo do theirs do, that obſerve not this Counſel. See Prov. 17.25. A Fooliſh ſon is a grief to his Father, and bitterneſs to her that bare him. Come, unleſs you will ſay plainly, ye will be Atheiſts; that your Converſion ſhall never make joy in Heaven; take this day my advice. Say juſt now, If prayers and pains will prevail, I will make glad my Father and Mother that ever they had me given unto them. I will learn diligently every Truth they teach me, I will pray hard for every Grace they commend. I will perform ſeriouſly every Duty they ſet me. I will reſiſt every Lust and Temptation they warn me of. I will imitate all the good I ſee in them. God, I will know. His Goſpel-Covenant, I will enter, and live by. My Holy Baptiſm I will know and keep. The Lords Table I will prepare for and haſten to. Holineſs I will induſtriouſly perfect, in the fear of God. No Man living, ſhall ſay henceforth, that I wrong him wilfully; or do him right unwillingly. And neither of my Parents ſhall be able with truth to ſay, that I do ſo much as ſeem to forget my debt to them and its depth. When this is truly ſaid, and with full purpoſe of heart, you then firſt begin to be good Children, and dutiful. Then you may be called, the Crown and Honour of your Fathers, as Prov. 17.6. and their very Glory, as it is Hoſ. 9.11. Such as make them not aſhamed (but honoured) in the Gate, or in all company; as Pſal. 127.4, 5. And until you thus reſolve and declare, you are the clean contrary. For you are Fools. And he that begeteth a Fool, doth it to his ſorrow, the Father of a Fool hath no joy. 'Tis no joy, ſave to a Fool, to beget and breed up Slaves for the Devil and Fuel for Hell. And this Holy Parents do know, if you not, ſc. That "A wicked Child of Godly Parents is one of Earths uglyeſt burthens; and (without wonderful Grace intervening) one of Hells certaineſt Fire-brands.