The Mischiefs of Self-Ignorance, Part 27
Hind. 4. ANother impediment to ſelf-acquaintance, is, that men obſerve not their hearts in a time of trial, but take them always at the beſt, when no great temptation puts them to it. A man that never had any opportunity to riſe in the world, perhaps doth think he is not ambitious, and deſireth not much to be higher then he is: becauſe the coal was never blown: when a little affront doth ferment their Pride into diſquietneſs and deſires of revenge; or applauſe doth ferment it into tumor or ſelf-exaltation, they obſerve not then the diſtemper when it is up and moſt obſervable; becauſe the nature of ſin is to pleaſe and blind, and cheat the mind into a conſent: And when the ſin ſeems paſt, and they find themſelves in a ſeeming humility and meekneſs, they judge of themſelves as then they find themſelves, as thinking that diſtemper is paſt and cured, and they are not to judge of themſelves by what they were, but what they are. And by that Rule every drunkard or whoremonger ſhould judge themſelves temperate, and chaſte, as ſoon as they forbear the act of ſin: And what if poverty, age or ſickneſs hinder them from ever commiting either of them again? For all this the perſon is a drunkard or fornicator ſtill; becauſe the Act is not pardoned, nor the heart ſanctified, and the habit or corrupt inclination mortified. And thus paſſionate perſons do judge of themſelves by their milder temper, when no temptation kindleth the flame. But little doth many a one know himſelf, what corruption is latent in his heart, till tryal ſhall diſcloſe it, and draw it into ſight. Jam diu Diabolus (inq. Auguſt.) ſopitum ignem ſine ullis flammis occultat, donec duas faculas jungens ambas ſimul accendat, &c.] If theſe perſons be not always ſinning, they will not take themſelves for ſinners: But he that hath once ſinned knowingly, in Gods account continueth in the ſin, till his heart be changed by true repentance.
Yet, on the other ſide, I would not wrong any upright ſoul, by perſwading them to judge of themſelves, as they are at the worſt, in the hour of temptation; for ſo they will be miſtaken as certainly, though not as dangerouſly as the other.
You will aske then, What is to be done in ſuch a difficult caſe? If we muſt neither judge of our ſelves as we are at the beſt out of temptation, not yet as we are at the worſt in the hour of temptation, when and how then ſhall we judge of our ſelves?
I anſwer, It is one thing to know our particular ſins, and their Degrees, and another thing to know our ſtate in general, whether we are juſtified and ſanctified or not. To diſcern what particular ſin is in us, and how apt it is to break forth into act, we muſt watch all the ſtirrings and appearings of it, in the time of the temptation: But to diſcern whether it be unmortified and have dominion, we muſt obſerve theſe Rules.
1. There is no man on earth that is perfectly free from ſin: and therefore it is no good conſequence, that ſin reigneth unto death, becauſe it is not perfectly extinguiſhed, or becauſe it is ſometime committed, unleſs in the caſes after expreſſed.
2. No ſin that is truly Mortified and Repented of, ſhall condemn the ſinner: For pardon is promiſed to the truly penitent.
3. Whatever ſin the Will, accordingly to its Habitual inclination, had rather leave then keep, is truly Repented of and mortified. For the Will is the principal ſeat of ſin; and there is no mere ſinfulneſs, then there is Wilfulneſs, Rom. 7.15, 16, 19, 20, 21, 22.
4. There are ſome ſins which cannot be frequently commited in conſiſtency with true grace, or ſincere repentance: and ſome which may be frequently commited in conſiſtency with theſe. As where ſins are known and great, or ſuch as are eaſily ſubject to the power of a ſanctified will, ſo that he that will reject them, may: As one ſuch ſin muſt have actual Repentance, if actually known; ſo the frequent committing of ſuch will not conſiſt with Habitual Repentance. Whereas thoſe ſins, that are ſo ſmall as upright perſons perhaps may not be ſufficiently excited to reſiſtance; or ſuch as upon the ſincere uſe of means are ſtill unknown, or ſuch as a truly ſanctified Will may not ſubdue, are all of them conſiſtent with repentance and a juſtified ſtate; And in this ſenſe we reject not that diſtinction betwixt Mortal and Venial ſin; that is, between ſin inconſiſtent with a ſtate of spiritual life, and ſin conſiſtent with it, and conſequently pardoned. He that had rather leave the former ſort (the mortal ſins) will leave them; and he that truly repents of them, will forſake them: But of the other (conſiſtent with Life) we muſt ſay, that a may may poſſibly retain them, that yet had rather leave them, and doth truly repent of them.
5. A ſin of carnal Intereſt (eſteemed good in order to ſome thing which the fleſh deſireth; and ſo loved and deliberately kept) hath more of the Will, and is more inconſiſtent with Repentance, then a ſin of meer paſſion or ſurprize, which is not ſo valued upon the account of ſuch an intereſt.
6. They that have grace enough to avoid Temptations to Mortal or Reigning ſin, and conſequently that way to avoid the ſin, ſhall not be condemned for it, whatever a ſtronger temptation might have done.
7. Where bodily diſeaſes neceſſitate to an act, or the omiſſion of an act, the Will is not to be charged with that which it cannot overcome, notwithſtanding an unfeigned willingneſs: As if a man in a frenzie or diſtraction ſhould ſwear or curſe, or blaſphem; or one in a Lethargie, or potent Melancholy cannot read or pray, or meditate; &c.
8. As frequent Commſſions of venial ſins (or ſuch as are conſiſtent with true grace) will not prove the ſoul unſanctified; ſo the once committing of a groſs ſin by ſurprize, which is afterward truly repented of, will not prove the abſence of habitual repentance, or ſpiritual life, ſo as the frequent committing of ſuch ſins will.
So that I conclude, in order to the detection of the ſin itſelf, we muſt all take notice of our ſelves as at the worſt, and ſee what it is that Temptations can do: but in order to the diſcovery of our ſtate, and whether our ſins are pardoned or no, we muſt eſpecially obſerve whether their eruptions are ſuch as will conſiſt with true habitual Repentance, and to note what Temptations do with us; to this end,