The Drunkards Character, Section 27
§ 27
ANd what is their discourse? First,Drunkennesse discovers all secre…s. they discover all secrets. For like as when the wine purgeth, (saith Plutarch) that which is in the bottome, commeth up to the brimme, and swimmeth aloft; or else it breaketh the vessels, and runneth all abroad: even so drunkennes discovers the secrets of the heart. Yea, if discretion and moderation bee as hoops to a vessell, how should these hogsheads keepe their liquor, if you take away those hoops?
It is the property of a dru…kard to disgorge his bosome, with his stomack; to emty his mind, with his maw; he can ill rule his hands, but worse his tongue; fat cups oyle that so much, that it cannot sticke; and makes it so laskitive, that it cannot hold from bewraying hoth himselfe and others: and whatsoever is in the heart of a sober man, is found in the tongue of a drunkard.
Drink disapparells the soule, and is the betrayer of the mind; it turnes the key of the tongue, and makes it unlocke that counsell, which before wisdome had in keeping; even the thoughts of the heart, which God hath secluded from the very Divell, by this do suffer a search. He that would anatomize the soule, may doe it best when wine hath benummed the senses; no such rack for confession as wine, nor could the Divel ever finde a cunninger baite to angle with: even the most benighted cogitations of the soule, in this flood doe tumble from the swelling tongue. For as steele is the glasse of beauty: so wine is the glasse of the minde, saith Euripides. And experience shewes, that when a man is drunke, you may thrust your hand into him, like an Ele-skin, and strip his inside outwards. And nothing more common with States-men and Politians, then to make drinke their Dalilah; to draw out of their enemies those secrets which nothing else will doe.
When any Embassadors came unto Bonosus the Emperor, his manner was to make them drunk, that so he might heare all their secrets. And Iosephus speakes of another politick Prince, who used when any Embassador was sent unto him from his enemies, to ply him with drink; and thereby he wrested all his secrets out of him. Yea, this was the onelyonly sauce that Bacchus gave Ceres, when hee fell in love with Venus. And did not Noah being drunke reveale those secrets, which lay hid above six hundred yeares before.
I confesse, there is no generall rule but admits of some exceptions; and this rule is not alwayes infallible: for wine makes some quick spirited, others dull; this man talkative, another dumb; according to the disposition and constitution of the party. Yea, I confesse the complot and purpose to kill Casar, was as faithfully committed unto Cimber, who would daily bee drunk with quaffing of wine; as unto Cassius, that drank nothing but water: neither had Augustus any cause to bee discontented with Lucius Piso that conquered Thrace, for all he trusted him with the secretest affaires he had in hand: nor Ti…erius with Cossus, to whom hee imparted all his seriousest counsells; although both so gave themselves to drinking, that they were often faine to bee carried from the Senate, and both reputed notable drunkards: but it is rarely seene, that the contrary holds not.
Wherefore I will not tell a bibber what I would not heare againe, lest I heare of it againe from those, to whom I dare not avouch it againe. Yea, for this cause (were there no other reason) I will beware of wine, I will not doe God so great a dishonour as to demideifie man, in making him privie to my heart and thoughts. Yea, seeing God hath given me two eyes, two eares, and but one tongue; I wil heare and see double to what I speak. And so much to shew how well the drunkard can keepe counsell, if any be so mad as to trust him with a secret, I passe on to
his
Vaine babling,
Surrilous jesting,
Wicked talking,
&c.