A Care Cloth, Treatise · Chapter 5
CHAP. V. Containing the firſt vſe of the point.
Ʋſe. 1 NOw from this point, we hauehave ſomething to inferre for the vſe of the vnmarried,To the vnmarried. and alſo of the married. To the vnmarried wee hauehave a double inſtruction: the firſt is this; that he preferre not a ſinfull ſingle life, before a finleſſe marriage, as ſome hauehave (fooliſhly and filthily) done, either our of a couetous mind, or of a licentious mind, or both. Many a man looking with an ouer-carnall eye, vponupon the troubles that attend matrimony, & conſidering the many aduerſities which doe commonly tread vponupon the heeles of this eſtate (wherof alſo we ſhal ſpeak at large anon) do chuſe rather to poiſon their ſoules with the deadly poyſon of whoredome, then to be a little incumbred in this preſent life. But I pray you my brethren, be not ſo ouer-warie for your carnall eaſe: Take not leaue to your ſelues to liue in frequent pollutions and impurities, rather then in honeſt matrimonie, for ſcare forſooth, of thoſe diuers inconueniences, with which marriage, becauſe of ſinne, is vſually accompanied. Marriage is no ſinne, whoredome is. He that takes a wife, offends not God, endangers not himſelfe to hardneſſe of heart, and eternall damnation: but he which takes an harlot, or defileth himſelfe with other pollutions, both prouokes Gods wrath againſt himſelfe, and alſo caſts himſelfe into the very pit of hell, ſo much as in him lyeth. Wherefore if any mans neceſſity be ſuch, that he cannot reſtraine his deſires, nor keepe his wiſhes within compaſſe, but that in ſpight of all his earneſt endeauours to the contrary, they worke and boyle within him, let him pray vntounto God, to make conuenient prouiſion for him, and imbrace marriage with ſome miſerie, rather then ſweete ſinne, that is to ſay, deadly poyſon, becauſe it pleaſeth in the taſte. None inconueniences, none incumbrances, are anſwerable to the grieuouſneſſe of ſinne. It is Gods wonderfull goodneſſe, that (knowing the temper and diſpoſition of men in this kind) hee hath debarred no man from this ordinance, but hath allowed them a remedie againſt ſinne, which it ſelfe is no ſinne. Remember the Apoſtles ſaying in this place, He that marries, ſinneth not; and compare it with other diſorders, which men fal into for want of marriage. He that commits fornication, ſinneth; he that commits adulterie, ſinneth; hee that defileth himſelfe with other more vnnaturall commixtures, ſinneth; yea, he that burneth (that is to ſay, liues in perpetuall ſtrong and maſterfull deſires, preuailing againſt all his reſolutions, and carrying away his will, though not his body, he alſo) ſinneth: but he that marrieth, doth not ſinne, Therefore it is better to marry, then commit fornication; it is better to marry, then to commit adultery; it is better to marrie, then to commit vncleaneſſe; it is better to marrie, then to burne; it is better to aduenture vponupon trouble without ſinne, then vponupon ſinne without trouble. I ſpeake not this, to make any man leſſe carefll, in ſtriuing againſt his owne deſires, and in vſing all vertuous and holy meanes of beating downe his luſts, neither would abate any whit of a mans earneſt endeauours, to liue chaſtly in ſingle life, and ſo to continue ſingle: but I ſpeake it, to ſhew, that if any man find his paſſions too ſtrong for him, and perceiue that he cannot, but either marry or ſin, he ſhould rather marry without ſinne, then ſinne without marriage. It is no wiſe courſe to ruſh vponupon hell hereafter, to auoyde trouble for the preſent. But, if the feare of trouble, ſhould not make a man forbeare matrimony (that cannot otherwiſe continue chaſte,) how much leſſe ſhould the vnwillingneſſe to be confined to one perſon, make a man continue vnyoked, that he might more freely giuegive ouer himſelfe to his wandring and vnſatiable appetite? This were a notable cntempt of Gods ordinance, and a ſelling of ones ſelfe ouer to worke vncleanneſſe with greedineſſe. He that of purpoſe forbeares the medicine, becauſe hee would not hauehave his diſeaſe cured, muſt needes periſh by the diſeaſe, when God alloweth all men to marrie, that cannot containe; he that refuſeth marriage, becauſe he would nor containe, doth yeeld himſelfe ſo farre at length, to the power of incontinencie, that euen marriage it ſelfe will bee vnable to repreſſe his vnruly deſires; and thus he brings vponupon himſelfe extreme hard-hearredneſſe, euen ſo, that hee is without feeling, as the Apoſtle ſpeaketh, and by ſelling himſelfe vp to ſinne, cauſeth God in inſtice to giuegive him wholly ouer to the luſts of his owne heart, and to the effectuall working of Satans temptations, till at the end, his luſt be beyond remedie, becauſe at firſt hee refuſed the remedie, for the louelove of luſt. O let none amongſt you be ſo wicked, as to forbeare to liue a married perſon for the nonc't, that he may liue a beaſt. But whoſoeuer he or ſhe be, that is not of power to containe, let him acknowledge and enioy the goodneſſe of God, and preuent ſinne, by that which is no ſinne, euen by marrying.