Exposition of the Moral Law, Book 2 · Commandment 5 · Exercitation 3
EXERCITAT. III. Of the husbands duty to the wife. Commandement. V.
1. Pet. 3.7. Husbands give honour to your wives as to the weaker veſſels.
THe husbands duty is expreſſed in the creation thus,How the husbands duty to his wife is expreſſed. They two ſhall be one fleſh: the man and the woman that were two, are made one; they are unum principium generationis, therefore the man ſhould love his wife and not hate her, becauſe ſhee is his owne fleſh.
Things ſaid to be one foure wayes.They are made one fleſh. Sundry wayes things are made one, there is unum naturale, as the ſoule and the body make one man naturally: unum artificiale, as ſtones and timber make the houſe: Vnum myſticè, as Chriſt and his Church; and this union in marriage is partly morall, and partly naturall.
Secondly, the husbands duty to the wife is expreſſed in the creation, thus; He ſhall leave father and mother, and ſhall cleave unto his wife, Gen. 2.24. When the woman went out of her fathers houſe to her husbands, ſhe was ſaid foreign as Acſaph when ſhe went from her father Caleb. Ioſh. 15.18. this was called foreign, her going out, but when ſhe came in into the houſe of Othniel her huſband, this was called foreign, her going in to her husband; and Iſaac brought Rebeccha into his mother Sarahs tent, Gen. 24.67. to ſignifie that he would have her in place of a mother, and that he would leave father and mother for her.
The ſecond part of the husbands duty is to cleave to his wife, which Chriſt expoundeth Matt. 19.5. foreign, to be glued to his wife:foreign agglutinor, glutinamentis adjungor, metaphorice adhaereſco, a foreign gluten. the Lord to expreſſe his love to his Church, compareth her to a girdle cleaving to his loines, Ier. 13.11. As the girdle cleaveth to the loins of a man, ſo have I cauſed to cleave to me the whole houſe of Iſrael, and the whole houſe of Iuda, ſaith the Lord; Now hee ſaith, hee made her to cleave to him as a girdle to his loines, but the ſeventy tranſlate it, Hee glued her to his loines, and why was ſhee glued to his loines?Amor eſt in corde tanquam in ſede, & in renibus tanquam inſtrumento. becauſe the reines which are the ſeat of love, are in the loines: My reines doe teach mee in the night ſeaſon, Pſalm. 16.7. Therefore he carryed his Church girded about his loines: hee that would honour his wife ſhould be glued to her in affection: a thing that is glued, will breake ſooner in any part then where it is glued.
The man when hee is married,To ſpread the lap of the garment, and to overſhadow the woman, ſignifie protection and love. is ſaid to ſpread the lap of his garment over his wife: Ruth. 3.9. Spread thy skirt over thine handmaid. And the holy Ghoſt alluding to this, in more comelineſſe and decencie is ſaid to overſhadow the virgin Mary, Luc. 1.35.Alluſion. The power of the higheſt ſhall overſhadow thee.
Moſes more particularly ſetteth downe thoſe things which the husband owes to his wife, Exod. 21.10.The husband owes five things to his wife. Firſt he oweth her meat; ſecondly cloathing; thirdly cohabitation, the fourth thing which the husband oweth to his wife, is Debitum tempus, and the fifth thing which he oweth to her, is honour.
The firſt thing that he oweth to his wife is meat, She eat of his morſels, and dranke of his cup, 2. Sam. 12.3. Exod. 21:10. If hee take another hee ſhall not diminiſh her food; in the originall it is Sheerah, fleſh; for the Hebrewes put fleſh for all things neceſſary for the maintenance of our life, as well as they doe bread, Pſalm. 78.10.foreign caro eius. Fleſh put for all neceſſary food, Can hee prepare fleſh for his people in the wilderneſſe? Targum paraphraſeth it, alimentum ejus; and the ſeventy tranſlate it foreign, things neceſſary for them.
foreign Indumentum.The ſecond thing is indumentum, keſuth, the vertuous woman cloatheth her busband that hee may be knowne in the gates of the city: and the Hebrewes ſay, that the good woman cloatheth her ſervants, and the good huſband cloatheth his wife, and God cloatheth all; the wife is ſaid to cloath her husband, when ſhee prepareth that which he bringeth in to her.
foreignThe third thing which hee oweth to his wife is cohabitation (Tabhoth eleah) the ſeventy tranſlate it foreign viri cohabitantes; the Polygamiſts could not performe this duty to their wives to dwell with them. The kings of Perſia had many wives, and when the king made choiſe of them, before they came unto him, they ſtayed in a chamber called foreign, the virgins chamber: and after they were married, they ſtayed in a chamber called foreign, the wives chamber; this was contrary to this cohabitation that a man is bound to dwell with his wife.
The fourth thing which the husband owes to his wife is debitum tempus [gnonathah] which comes from gnanah, foreign Debitum tempus a foreign reſpondere.reſpondere, the ſeventy tranſlate it foreign, vel conſuetudinem, and the Apoſtle calleth it due benevolence. 1. Cor. 7.3.
The fift thing which the husband oweth to his wife is Cabhod, foreign Honor.honor, when they were married hee ſaid, Eſto mihi in uxorem ſecundum legem Moſis & Iſrael, & ego ſecundum verbum Dei, colam te, honorabo te, alam te, & regam te, The properties of the head.juxta morem eorum qui colunt, honorant, alunt, & regunt uxores ſuos fideliter.
The husband is the wives head; the head excelleth the reſt of the members: 1. Eminentia, it is more eminent; 2. Perfectione, in perfection; 3. Influentia, it giveth influence; 4. Conformitate cum caeteris membris, in conformity betwixt it and the reſt of the members.
Firſt it excelleth the reſt of the body eminentia, although it be ſuperiour to the reſt of the body, yet it muſt not foreign or foreign, that is,foreign carry a lordly dominion over them, but onelyonly Maſhal, gently to command her.
Secondly,The man ſhould excell the wife in gifts. the head excelleth the reſt of the members in perfection: ſo ſhould the man excell the woman in gifts; although the man excell the woman in gifts, yet hee ſhould not deſpiſe her, thinking her no fit match for him:An apologue of the Sun and the Moone. the Hebrewes have an apologue fit for this purpoſe, The Sunne ſaid upon a time that the Moone could not be a fit match for him, for hee giveth light and heat to all things, and in the body hee ruleth the heart, and in the mettals, the gold; and for time he ruleth both the day and the yeare. But the Moone replyed, If ye rule the yeare, I rule the monethmonth; if ye rule the day, I rule the night; if ye rule the heart, I rule the braine; and if ye rule the gold, I rule the ſilver; wherefore there is no ſuch inequalitie but that I may match with you. Many men have a high conceit of themſelves that they are like the cedar of Lebanon, and women but like the thiſtle of Lebanon 2. King: 14.9.
Thirdly, the head giveth influence to the body,A man ſhould teach and rule his wife. ſo ſhould a man teach and rule his wife. In that viſion of Ioſeph, the Moone and the ſtarres fell downe before him, the Sunne was his father, the Moone his mother, and the ſtarres his brethren: and as the Sunne giveth light to the Moone and Starres, ſo ſhould the husband to the wife.
The laſt thing is conformity betwixt the head and the reſt of the members;There ſhould be a conformity betwixt the man and the wife. this conformity ſhould make a man to cheriſh his wife, She ſlept in his boſome, 2. Sam. 12.3. Thoſe things which are moſt deare unto us, wee keepe them in our boſome. Eſay 40.11. and Iohn leaned in Chriſts boſome, and the reaſon is ſubjoyned, becauſe he loved him beſt, Iohn 13.23. Mothers keepe their young ones in their boſomes, and if it were poſſible they would take them into their very bowels againe, Portatur in ſinu infans, recumbit in ſinu dilectus, & cubat in ſinu uxor.