Treatise of Conscience Wherein Divers Secrets are Discovered, Chapter 6
CHAP. VI.
The marks quhairby the woundit conscience may be knawin.
QVhair the saul & Conscience is wounded and oppressed, through the sicht of sinne, and through the feeling of Gods wrath against man for sinne; there is na quietnes nor contentment there: For, howe can there be any rest, or delectation, quhair man hes a feiling of Gods wrath kindled aganis him, and is perswaded in his heart, that hee is out of the favour of God? Na, na, sa lang as hee is in that estate, there is nathing for him but wanrest, nathing but feare, sorrowe, languishing, wearines, heavines, darknes, & paine, baith within, and without. In sik sort, that if there were not intermissioun, at some time, of the torment, the bodie were not able to sustaine it: For the saul and the bodie being joyned together by a perfite vnion, The vexation of the saul extendis to the body, quhilk hes a compassion and a suffering together with the saull. Quhairvpon it followis, that hee quha is troubled in spirit and Conscience, wil be bereft of all naturall rest, though vtherwaies he be hail baith in body and spirit, and that nature vse al the right offices; ȝit the Conscience being wounded, the trouble thairof, sall bereif man the nichts sleep: his slumbrings wil be short, and encombred with vglie dreames: his waiknings wil be triste, & his body commoved with heit and beitting, as though he were in a fiever: and his sins wil come oft in mind, quhilk on na wise hee can eschewe, nor forget. Siklike, the meat and drink will be lothsome vntounto him: neither wil he delight meikil in any warldly plesure: But all earthly recreation wil bee mair fashious, nor delectable vntounto him: Ȝea it wil appeare to himselfe, that al the creatures of God are animate, as it were, and conspired against him. Nevertheles, the inclination and behavior of the wicked man, beeing visited by the hande of God, wil be far different from the behauiour of the godly: For the wicked man wil be mair sorrowful for his awin wanrest, and paine, nor for his sinne, quhairby hee hes offendit the majestie of God. He wil also blame the instrumentall causes of his trouble, mair nor himselfe: and wil seeke vnlawful meanes to bee releifed of his paine; sometime labouring to delait it out of his mind, by giuing himselfe to warldly pleasures, and vsing of wanton and riotous companie: sometyme by revenging himselfe on them whome he estiems to be the instrumental causes of his trouble: and sometime by consulting with sorcerers, and seeking responces of vncleane sprits. To be short, he hes euer a looking back to the warld; and if he get any releif of his paine, incontinent he returnis to his former impietie, like a sowe to the puddle, and heaps sinne vponupon sin, quhairby his conscience is mair and mair wounded, and his paine thereafter incresed: Quhil at the last, hee fallis in vtter despair; and ather puts violent hands in himselfe, as Iudas did; or els is perpetually tormented with the worme of his conscience, as Cain was, during his whole life tyme. By the contrair, the Childe of God, quhen he feels the correctioun of his Maker, and is accused by his awin conscience, he is immediatly taken with a godly sorrow for his sinne, and hes a seeking to God for merciemercy and releif. Notwithstanding, hee wil finde in himselfe a great inconstancie, & waiknes: For some tyme he wil be ouerset with sadnes, and in ane instant wil be changed, quhairof he cannot render a reason, but as the spirit mouis him: Sometyme, he wil be fervent in praier, sometime cold and remitted: Sometime, he wil pray formally and weil, sometime informally, being interrupted with teares,Psalme 77. 4. or with wauering thochts: ȝea, sometime he wil be sa confused, that hee cannot pray, but wil vtter his passions with grones, with sichis, & with sobbes. Attoure, hee wil hauehave ane earnest desire to heare the word of God preached, or red; and wil think it marvelous comfortable and sweit: and when he heares any part thereof that touchis him selfe, whether sa it be the description of his miserie, or the gracious promises, & mercies of the Lord rehearsed; he wil rejoice exceidingly, and partly for joy of the gudnes of God, and partly for griefe of his awin fal, and vnthankfulnes towards his Creator; he wil oftymes burst out with teares in aboundance. Besides this, the wounded conscience may not abide to heare any cursed or prophane speaking: or to heare the name of God in any waies blaspheamed, meikil les wil he do it himselfe, For hee is taken with a great fear to offend the majestie of God, hauing alredy felt the stroke of his hand. Siklike, the leist offence quhilk hee can commit, wil appear to him to be of gret grauitie & waight: For like as the wound of the body wil be sa sair, that the patient can scarselie suffer any thing to touch it: Even so, the woundit conscience is sa waik that the lest vnseemly word, wrang luke, or wauering thocht quhilk man can vse, wil hurt and trouble it, and make it to remord. Finally, when the oppressed conscience gets any blenk of comfort, or release of his paine; he wil spring for joye, and think that he sal neuer again be moued with sik perturbation: Bot sa sone as the Lord turnis away his face, newe troble and doubtings wil arrise againe, as though he had never receiued comfort. And that quhilk is admirable, & a wonderful wark of Gods spirit; at sometyme the remembrance of a sinne, or of a deed done, wil sa trouble man, that he cannot be comforted: And at ane vther time the commemoration and sicht of that same sin, wil na mair moue him, nor gif it had neuer bene committed. This appearantly proceedis in the wicked, from a hardened and obdured heart: But in the faithful, from the assurance of the holy spirit, that the sinne is forgiuen, and that merciemercy is graunted through Iesus Christ.
This meikle I thocht necessary to write, concerning the discouerie of a wounded Conscience: To the effect, that the disease being discovered, the remedie may bee the mair easilie found out, and skilfullie applied to the same.