Treatise of Conscience Wherein Divers Secrets are Discovered, Chapter 5
CHAP. V.
Of the troubled spirit and conscience, and how it differs from melancholie, from vther naturall diseases, and warldly sorrowis.
THe Spirit of man, and every function of the spirit (either the imagination, the reasoun, the judgement, or the memory) may be divers & sindrie waies damnified and troubled: Some tyme by naturall sicknes and diseases, sometime by naturall melancholie and euill disposition of the body, sometime by contracted melancholie, quhilk man apprehendeth through sorrowe and care of warldly thingis, sometime by the exterior leision of the partes of the head, quhilk are called, the seats of these functions: And sometime through sudden and extreame feare, louelove, joy, or vther sicklyke passions of the minde. Al the quhilk thingis, are obserued by the mediciners and chirurgiens, & in thair warkis ar aboundantlie set furth. Yea sometime the Lord by his immediate power, wil abstract the judgment, the memorie, or vther offices of the spirit, & wil strike man with frensie, with madnes, or forgetfulnes; & restore them againe at his pleasure. But the troble of mans Conscience, is farre different from any of these troubles: quhilk is obserued for the maist pairt, to arrise after this maner. Quhen it pleisis the Lord at any time, to shewe his angry face, and to rebuke man for sin, incontinent man is striken with sudden feare and trembling, and begins to call to remembrance quhat sins he hes committit, and quhairin he hes offendit his God: Ȝea, the Lord will object his sinnes clearlie before his eies, albeit they hauehave bene neuer sa lang buried & forgot with man: Quhilk quhen he remembers, seeth the vglines thairof; is accusit by his awin Conscience, & feillis the fearce wrath of God kindled against him for his sinne; his spirit and Conscience is marvellouslie troubled, and is suddenlie oppressed, with extreame paine and torment: In sik sort, that the trouble of the spirit wil oftimes redound to the bodie, and trouble the whole estate of man; as thogh he were takin with sum agonie, or sharp fevar. It is true, that every man whome the Lord so visits, will not bee alike sore troubled and tormented; But sum in a higher, sum in a lower degrie, according to the modificatioun of the Lord: But hee that hes the feeling of his awin sinne, and of the wrath of God aganis his sinne, in the highest degrie; that man sall see nathing but the angrie face of God, burning like a consuming fire against him, and sal think na vther thing, but that the Lord in his just judgement hes castin him away, out from his presence & kingdom: Quhilk of al torments, that man can suffer in this life, is the gretest. This kinde of trouble that proceids from the Conscience, seemis sa strange & difficil to natural and warldly men, that thay can hardly consaue it, but takes it euer vp wrang: and estiems those persons that are so troubled, either to be furious, lunatick, or fantastick: either els to hauehave taken sum apprehension, melancholie, or vaine conceit: Ȝea, not onelyonly appeirs it hard vntounto them, but also to the very Children of God, vnlesse they hauehave either had some taisting of it them selues, or else hauehave bene wel instructed therein, by sik as hes had the liuely experience thairof: As it is na wonder that flesh and blude vnderstand it not: For it is a great mysterie, and a woonderfull wark of the maist high, quhilk by natural reason, can not be comprehended. But as I hauehave said before, the difference betuix the trouble of the conscience, & vther troubles, is notable and great. For the diseases before rehearsed are naturall; the disease of the Conscience, supernaturall. The natural diseases proceids from the euill constitution and disposition of mans body, and his warldly sorrow, and wanrest from the solicitude & care quhilk he hes of warldly things: But the wanrest and anxietie of the conscience, proceids from the sicht & consideration of mans sinne. Mairouer, we see that the natural diseases of the bodie may be cured, by vsing of naturall remedies: sicknes may be healed, by the application of salutaire medicaments: The melancholious humors may be purged, and the body brought to a gude temperature and constitution: But all the Phisitians, and all the natural medecine vnderunder heauen, can na mair remeid the woundit conscience, nor corporall meat and drinke can nourish the saul; or naked words can satisfie the hunger & thirst of the body. Siklike, the displesure and sorrow quhilk man contracts, either through the losse, or through the care and desire of earthly things; wil either, through tract of tyme vanish away, quhair thingis lost cannot be recouered; or be turned into joy and contentment, quhen hee obtaineth the things that he disired; whether sa it be riches, promotion, or victory over his enemies: But all the riches, honour, and plesures of the warld, wil never releeue the paine of a tormented conscience; (vnles it befor a very short space) while inwarde comfort be given of the comforter, the haly Ghost. I deny not but that the Lord will sometime vse outward affliction, as a means quhairby hee will cause man to call his sinnes to remembrance, & consequently, wil make his awin conscience to condemne and torment him: But the saule and conscience beeing once deeply woundit; na worldlie consolation, nor earthlie remedie can avail: while the spirite of God worke first inwardly in the heart. Farther, it is to be vnderstand, that not onelie the wicked and reprobate are accustomed to hauehave this trouble & prick of conscience: But also the very chosen children of God, yea his dearest servants hes euer bene, and ȝit are, maist subject to the feiling of thair awin sin and weaknes: Quhairby thay wil be sometimes reduced to sik extremitie, that thair faith wil be altogether smored for a season, & thay brocht to the very brinke, and bordour of desperation. Notwithstanding, al their sufferings, in the end redounds to their eternall joy and salvation: Quhair by the contrair, the troubles of the wicked, turnis at last to their vtter wrack and confusion: For albeit the Lord, to trie & to humble his awin, & to let them knaw thair awin infirmities, wil sumty me hide his face for a litle season, and couer them as it wer, with a cloud: during the quhilk space, they wil be in greit anguish & perplexitie, overshadowed with heavines & darknes, like the Moone ecclipsed, & priuate of the licht of the Sunne: Neverthelesse, in the middes of thair miseries, he wil edge by the cloude, and shewe thame blenks of mercy, of comfort, and of licht: and at last will turne his louing countenance againe, and driue away al the darknes, and heavines of thair sauls, and illuminat them with eternal licht, and gladnes. To conclude, I wil say this meikle farther, That there is nane whome the Lord hes predestinat to salvation, quhilk sal not, at sum time of thair life, be troubled, and tormented in some measure (though not all equallie) in thair saull & conscience, throgh the sicht of thair awin sinne: For this is certaine, that we cannot enter into the kingdome of God, except we first suffer, and abide tryall: It is not possible, that wee can be exalted with euerlasting exaltation, except wee be first casten downe and brocht lowe: It is not possible, that we can be partakers of eternall glory and gladnes in the heuen with Christ, vnles wee be first participant of paine with Christ, and feill with him, in some mesure, the torments of hel in our sauls and Consciences. Thairfore, let every ane of vsus make vsus for it, and prepare our selues for the day of trial and temptation: Let vsus turne in time to God, by earnest repentance, and amendement of life, before he strike vsus in his judgement: Let vsus alwaies flee sinn, and follow richteousnes, that in the day of trial the accusation of our Conscience may be the lesse feareful: And aboue all things, let vsus apprehend Iesus Christ crucified for our sinne, with a true and a liuely faith: For if we once constantly beleeue that; wee may be assured, that how low soeuer we be brocht, howe extreame soeuer our paine and torment be, ȝit the issue thairof salbe happie, & our deliverance joiful.