The Power of Godliness, Book 3 · Chapter 6
CHAP. VI. Why the Affection of Grief is to be Exercised aright. Of Sensible and Intellectuall Grief. Rules for the right Ordering of Grief, and how it may be stirred up in us. Motives against immoderate Sorrow, with the Meanes to redress it.
Question, WHy is Grief to be Ordered aright?
A. 1. There is not any Passion wherewith man is more afflicted in this life, then with Grief and sorrow, whose Objects present themselves continually to his mind and sense. 2. Excessive heaviness hath troublesome effects, for that first of all, it takes from the mind all meanes to attend the search of the truth. The reason is, for that all the powers of our soul, being tied unto, their essence, as the Branches unto the Tree, it doth of necessity follow, that when she is wholly busied in the functions of one of her powers, she abandons the rest, and cannot assist them in their actions. Wherefore, when as any thing draweth the soul wholly unto it, and imploys her whole action, she cannot attend any thing else: by consequence whereof, an exceeding heaviness seazing upon her, it draws her away; so, as she cannot think of any thing else, feeling her self opprest with Grief as with an heavy burden, which beares her down and hinders the liberty of her functions. It is therefore generally true, that there is not an action of the soul whereunto heaviness is not an hinderance and let. The which we find verified in our selves, for we never do any thing so well being possest by cares as when we are in joy; whereof the reason is visible: for that the will is the cause which excites us to act, the which hath the good for Object, and makes the more powerfull effect when it appeares pleasing and is accompanied with delight. It is true, that when there remains any hope to surmount the causes of our displeasure, then heaviness may serve to fortifie our action, and to enflame our courage, for that the more we feel any Grief, the more we strive to be freed from it. But if there be no hope remaining we become as it were senseless, and abandon our selves in prey to Grief. We flee the company of men, we hate the light, we find, the comforts and consolations of our friends importune,Iob 16.1. Luk. 22.4….16. … l. 22.15. …sal 3….7, 8. Psal .6, 7. Psa… 88.9. Prov. 1.13. Psal. 32 4. Prov. 17 22. …sal 102 4, 5. Peregr. de dolor cap. 2. …lin lib. 7. c…p. 36. K ck…tm. ubi su ra…ea cor Pirrhim rtur vis m est torvum & rigrum & veluti tostum. and have no content but to feed our selves with bitterness. Again, immoderate sorrow causeth deadness and hardness of heart, dis-inableth in prayer, stoppeth the ear against all words of comfort, and weakneth the powers of the soul and strength of grace, exposeth to temptations of impatience, and filleth the soul with much bitterness. Besides the torments which heaviness gives unto our spirits, she doth also produce fearfull effects upon our bodies, for that it is a maligne, cold, and drie Passion, which wasteth the radicall humour, and by little and little quenching the naturall heat of the body, thrusts her poyson even unto the heart, whose vigor she causeth to wither, and consumes the forces by her bad influence; whereof we see the signes after death, when as they come to open those that have been smothered with Melancholy. For instead of an heart, they find nothing but a drie skin like to leaves in Autumne. So that all things considered, we may say, that this passion is most pernicious, which thus consumes our forces, causeth our heart to languish, and makes our life short, but extreamly miserable. 3. There are many remedies against inordinate sorrow, but most commonly the Grief is so obstinate, as all applications are unprofitable. To cure it, we must first take away, or at least diminish the opinion of the evil which afflicts us: the which is easie to do, seeing it depends of our opinion. For, as Dignities, Honours, Crowns and Triumphs, give us no content, but what we take our selves when as they arrive; for that we have seen many weep even in the midst of all this pompe: so the paines of this life, ignominies, banishments, the loss of goods and kinsfolks, with all other miseries, afflict us not extraordinarily, unless we our selves make them more bitter and violent by our own weakness; for that we have seen many laugh in the midst of all there miseries. 4. Great and many are the benefits of well-ordered sorrow. It is the Physick of the soul; it purgeth, melteth, refineth,Eccl. 7.3. and preserveth the heart in good temper: It is the ground of spirituall comfort, the Nurse of Joy. It plougheth up the fallow of the heart, that the Word of salvation might sinke deeper and deeper. A mourning soul is a welt-manured soyl, that receiveth the seed of the Word, and bringeth forth fruit with advantage. Immoderate sorrow deadeth and weakneth the powers of the soul: but sorrow kept within limits and bounds, quickneth the heart to apprehend, judge and make use of whatsoever doth befall.
Q. There are two Kinds of Grief, the one which resides in the sensuall appetite, and the other which hath its seaete in the rationall: How do they differ?
A. 1. Sensible Grief ia alwaies accompanied with a visible alteration and change of the body which is moved; whereas the Grief of the mind hath not alwaies an agitation of the body, but most commonly contains it self within the bounds of the power where it is framed; in regard whereof it is sometimes attributed to God and Angels. 2. The cause of sensible Grief resides in the body, which suffers some violent impression that alters it. The cause [I say] doth reside in the body, which receives some kind of outrage: But the motion of Grief is alwaies framed in the soul, for that the body is not capable but by the presence of the soul. But the cause of the intellectuall Grief resides in the rationall part, and in the mind, which represents unto it self the evil which the receives from the Objects which present themselves unto her thought. 3. The apprehension and knowledge which the exteriour senses have of things,Keckerm. Physic. lib. 3. cap. 26. they do only regard the present Objects which make an actuall impression in them; but the understanding not onelyonly conceives things present, but even those that are past, and which may happen, or fall under the imagination of man. Hence it comes that corporeall Grief which followeth the apprehension, which things present make in the senses, grows only from the presence of Objects contrary to their inclinations. Whereas the Grief of the mind following the knowledge of the understanding, may grow from Objects that are present, past, or to come, and from those which man doth presuppose may succeed unto him.
Q. But whether of these Griefs is greater, this of mind, or that of the body?
A. We shew our selves more sensible of the Grief of the senses, then that of the mind: but it is most certain that the interiour Griefs which afflict the soul, are much stronger then the exteriour paines which torture the body. For that the apprehension of the mind and imagination, is much more noble then that of the senses, and especially, then that of feeling which hath the greatest share in corporeall paines. For proof whereof, we see great courages to avoid inferiour Grief, expose themselves voluntarily to the exteriour paines of torments and punishments, which are in some sort pleasing unto them, for that the interiour joy doth mollifie their paine: whereof we have glorious examples in the constancy of the Martyrs, who have exposed themselves to the fire, to tortures, to Wheeles, and to the rage of wild Beasts, for that they would not sinne against God, and burn Incense unto Idols.
Q. What Rules are to be observed touching the right ordering of Grief?
A. 1. That which in it self is good and holy, cannot be a just Object of Grief. No man can justly be grieved to see the wicked change their life unto a better, to embrace piety, to become just, valiant, moderate, wise, and adorned with other vertues. Yea, the most innocent souls rejoyce whensoever they see a man, who was formerly vitious and disordered, become vertuous and temperate: There being no man living that is unworthy of vertue, seeing that vertue by her presence doth extinguish vice. 2. In worldly things, such as concern our Estate, Name, Credit, Friends and the like, we must look, that our sorrow be not distrustfull, distracting, excessive, causing deadness, violent carrying reason captive, breeding impatience, blind and senseless looking onelyonly to the cross, not to the proper cause of all miseries, which is sinne and wickedness. 3. Spirituall sorrow for sinne; hardness of heart, and other Maladies of the soul, must be moved and moderated by faith, that it might quicken to Prayer, stirre up to receive the promises of comfort, and fit the heart to rejoyce in season. The affections do all move in a circle, each one drawing other, that if any one move aright, all follow in their course. Thus joy and sorrow succeed one another, and both take their fit season, if ei…her be orderly in motion. Sorrow is immoderate if it admit not joy: Joy is excessive if it drownsorrow. 4. Sorrow must be universall and uniforme proportioned to evil that doth afflict. As it is a fault to grieve when we should rejoyce, and to rejoyce when we should grieve; so its not to grieve for all evil, in a measure answerable to that which doth afflict. There be degrees of evils, so are there of sorrow for them.
Q. How may this sorrow be stirred up in us?
A. 1. Desire doth cause Grief, when the possessing of the desired good is hindered or delayed. And therefore what Motives soever do stirre up desire, the same may be used to awaken sorrow. 2. Love of good, causeth Grief for evil; as love to our preservation, doth oftentimes cause sorrow and heaviness, for that we apprehend as meanes of our destruction. By what meanes love to good is kindled,Psal. 55.4, 5. by the same is the heart wrought to sorrow for the contrary evil apprehended as present. 3. The apprehension of evil, is the Object or ground of sorrow, which is more or less intense according to the knowledge we have of the evil that presents it self unto our thoughts, the great danger, and eminency of it, The arguments that set forth unto us the certainty, likelihood, and extension of the evill, will be effectuall to work unfeigned sorrow.
Q. What Motives should perswade Christians to look well about them, that their sorrow be not immoderate?
A. 1. God requires, that we serve him with a cheerfull and merry heart, which they cannot do,Deut 16.11, 14 2 Cor. 9.7. Mal 2 13. who give way to excessive sorrow. Thou shalt rejoyce before the Lord thy God. God loves a cheerfull giver. See how the Lord complains by his Prophet, of the severity and perfidiousness of the Husbands, whereby the Wives were compelled to wet the Altar of the Lord with teares. That Exhortation of Nehemiah made to the people, when they wept at the hearing of the Law, may be alledged here very fitly. This day is holy unto the Lord your God, N…h 8.9.mourn not nor weep: for all the people wept, when they heard the words of the Law. The course that many good Christians hold is very preposterous, who afflict themselves for lack of delight and cheerfulness, and yet crucifie themselves with inordinate sorrow and dejectedness of Spirit. Elizeus being distempered with the presence of wicked King Joram, before he attempted any thing,2 King. 3.19. whereby the three Kings distressed for lack of water, might be refreshed; he commanded that one skilfull in Musick should be brought,Cartw. in Prov. …5 13. by whose art and skill the clouds of sadness and distemper might be dispelled. But if Prophets, who spake by immediate inspiration, needed this help of cheerfulness, much more others. 2. With men, the Offices which are performed with sad and heavy hearts, are unacceptable.Neh. 2.1, 2. Est. 4.2. What Master can away with a servant that is ever whining? Who can take pleasure in a sad lumpish companion? Delight and cheerfulness graces all Offices, is the Ornament of all Societies. 3. Sorrow is the band of the soul, that ties it close together that it can scarcely pant or draw breath in the open or free ayre.Psal. 4.1. Isa. 59.15.
Q. What course must be taken to redress immoderate sorrow?
A. 1. The principall meanes is serious meditation of Gods gracious promises, with full purpose and resolution of heart to rest and cleave unto them. My soul melteth for heaviness, quicken me according to thy Word, Psal. 119 28. The Word of God doth sustain and quicken the heart, promise grace and remission of sinnes, reveale unto us the mercy and loving kindness of the Lord, by which light and brightness the mists of sorrow are dispelled. And whereas excessive Grief doth arise from a false apprehension of evils present, which maketh us judge our case to be farre more intolerable then indeed it is: By the Word of truth we come to see our estate, what evils hang over our heads, of what quality, how they may be prevented, or where we may find strength to bear them, and how all things shall work for the best unto us. 2. Grief of mind is eased by faithfull prayer, wherein we lay open our cares into the bosome of the Lord, and waite upon him till deliverance come from above. In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord, Psal. 77.2. Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall ustain thee, Psal. 55.22. Pray and waite, seek and rouse up thy self to trust confidently. Out of the depths have I cried unto thee, O Lord. Psal 130.1, 2. 5, 6. ver.Lord hear my voice, &c. I waite for the Lord, my soul doth waite, and in his Word do I trust. Both these, Prayer and expectation must be joyned, as we must strive to pray, so we must stirre up our selves with all earnest resolution to waite with patience, otherwise the weight of sorrow will fall back upon us more heavily. 3. Former experience is very effectuall to asswage bitterness of heart. Psal. 143.5. I remember the daies of old, I meditate on all thy Works: I muse on the works of thy hands. Why hath the Lord dealt tenderly with us above all he promised, and made good whatsoever he hath spoken? Why hath he holpen us in our distresses, kept from us the things that we feared, granted our hearts desire? but that we should learn to trust in his mercy, and to expect like aid and assistance from him. And say we be plunged into the depth of sorrow, former experience giveth wisdom what course is to be taken to procure freedom. In bodily paines, if we have found ease by a Medicine, when the same evil pincheth, we know what is to be done. But in spirituall affairs it is much easier to get understanding by former experiments. 4 We must foresee the accidents of this life, not as if they should happen infallibly, for that were to make us miserable before the time; but as incident to all men, and that being of this number, if any cross or misery shall fall upon us, we may be the less amazed. For the crosses which we have foreseen, strike us more gently, and make a weaker impression in our soul. Wherefore a wise man of the world, who had prepared himself for all the accidents of this life, receiving the heavy news of the death of his Sonne, was no otherwise moved, but onelyonly said, I knew I had begotten a mortall creature. Doubtless it is the effect of an exact and singular wisdom, to have this feeling of humane accidents, not to be amazed at that which happens, nor to see any thing befall him, which he hath not foreseen. So as a wise man must alwaies remember, that dangers, losses, banishment, infirmities, yea the death of his Children, Wife, and that which he holds most dear, are things which may happen daily, and which threaten all men; and therefore if he be exempt, it is the benefit and gift of God, and if they befall him, that they are the miseries of his nature. For having this consideration of the common miseries of men, he finds himself bound to suffer constantly, and with patience, the necessities and crosses of this life: lest he should seem to fight against God, who hath laid this yoke upon him, to punish his offences, or to keep him in awe. 5. To mollifie our sorrows, we must remember that the miseries of this life give us a glorious subject to exercise our vertue, and to shew our constancy before the eyes of Heaven and Earth, which are Witnesses of our combates. For as Pilots cannot shew their Art and Industry but in stormes, nor Souldiers give proofs of their Valour, but in the midst of dangers: so a vertuous man hath no meanes to make his vertues shine, but amidst the adversities which befall him in this life. 6. But that which should most fortifie us in this thought, is, that God who doth cast us into the middest of these combates, will comfort and assist us in them, crown our constancy, and not suffer our labour to go unrewarded. 7. Grief is dispensed by divertisements, by affairs, by the entertainment of wise men, by the discourse of such as are learned and fear God, and by the force of our own judgment, conceiving with our selves that we should not suffer any misery to triumph over our courage and constancy; that to be toucht with affliction is a thing common to all men, but the glory of this constant opposition, belongs onelyonly to an eminent vertue. And lastly, that he who sends us these afflictions, is a Father, and no executioner. That it is that great God, without whose Decree there falles not a haire from our heads, and whose will no man may contradict, unless he will shew himself desperately mad. 8. As in other infirmities of the soul, a greater evil makes the less to be forgotten: so we may disperse a present heaviness, either by considering that it is not the present misery which we must lament, but others of greater moment, which more threaten us; or else in fortifiing our resolutions with a better hope, as in representing unto our selves the glory of Paradise, after the miseries of this life, and the Crowns of Heaven, after the combates of the the earth. All these things make great impressions in religious souls, capable of the feeling of piety. 9. Besides all these, there are remedies which are taken from the Objects of the senses, which recreate the mind and body in the midst of Grief. For first, whatsoever delights and gives joy unto the senses, causeth ease to the heaviness of the soul; for that joy is to the soul, that which rest is to the body. So as they which rest, repair their forces, mollifying the paine which hath tired them; so they which begin to tast any sweet pleasures, feel their Griefs to decay by little and little, and their heaviness to vanish away and go to smoke. Wherefore it is fit to draw them that are afflicted into the Fields, to enjoy a free ayr, and the sight of Heaven. It is good to shew them Harvest, Rivers, Medowes, and Hills; for that these divers objects divert the afflicted soul, and make it forget a part of its Grief. Some have thought that Musick and Songs are fit to charm our Melancholies, whereunto they referre that of Solomon, As he that putteth on a Garment in cold weather, and powereth vineger upon niter, so is he that fingeth Songs to an heavy heart: Prov. 25.20. Jun. in hunc. loc. Cartw. in Prov. 25.20. Cleaver. ibid.Which they further confirme by the example of David, who by the sound of his Harpe did pacifie the evil spirit which tormented Saul: and of Elijah calling for a Minstrell, who by his cunning and skill might asswage the bitterness of his spirit. But experience hath taught us, that all these things do many times rather entertain Melancholly, then disperse it. Wherefore in this subject we must observe the nature of the infirmity, and the quality of the Musick, which must be proportionable to the disease. The use of Wine also hath a particular vertue to expell cares.Psal. 104.15. Prov. 31.6. Jud. 9.13. Wine makes a cheerfull heart. Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and Wine unto those that be of heavy hearts. The reason is, for that Wine being moist and hot, it doth at one instant both water sweetly, and heat that bilious humour, which is as it were the center and root whereunto Melancholly doth fix it self. Sleep also and the use of Bathes, are very behovefull; for that both the one and the other reduce nature to her first habite, and restore her good constitution, which Grief had corrupted; the which disperseth heaviness, and causeth joy to enter into the afflicted soul. 10 To rectifie this Passion of mind, we must withstand the beginnings, and by all possible meanes expell those vaine, false, frivolous imaginations, absurd conceits, vaine sorrowes that afflict the heart,Lemnius. lib. 1. cap. 16. by doing something, or other that shall be opposite unto them, thinking of something else, perswading by reason, or howsoever to make a suddain alteration of them. It is not in the power of a Melancholly man altogether to free himself from fear and sadness: but he may choose whether he will give way too farre unto it, he may in some sort correct himself. A Philosopher was bitten with a mad Dog, and as the nature of that disease is to abhorre all waters, and liquid things, and to think still they see the Picture of a Dog before them, He went for all this to the Bathe, and seeing there as he thought in the water, the Picture of a Dog, with reason overcame this conceit. Thou art discontent, thou art sad and heavy, but why, upon what ground? Examine it throughly and thou shalt find none at all, or such as is to be contemned. Rule thy self then with reason, satisfie thy self, accustome thy self, weane thy self from those fond conceits, vain fears, strong imaginations, restless thoughts As he that weares an upright Shooe, may correct the obliquity or crookedness, by wearing it on the other side: so may we overcome and master our affections if we will, by turning them some other way. As in a City they do by stubborne rebellious Rogues than will not submit themselves to politicall Government, compell them by force: so must we do by our affections.Melancton. de anima. Epist. 3. c. 12. If the heart will not lay aside those vitious motions, and the phantasie those fond imaginations, we have another forme of Government, to enforce and restrain our outward members, that they be not led by our passions. If appetite will not obey, let the moving faculty over rule her, let her resist, and compell her to do otherwise. As in an Ague, the appetite would drink, sore eyes that itch would be rubbed, but reason saith no, and therefore the moving faculty will not do it. When we are urged with any matter of great importance, we forget our fears for the time, a business of more weight possessing that room in the heart. But what we can do upon such occasions, we may do voluntarily at another time if we will: for outward objects cannot give ability that was not in us before. 11. If Judgment be so depraved, reason over-ruled, will precipitated, that we cannot seek our own good, or moderate our selves, our best way for ease is to impart our misery to some friend, not to smother it up in our breasts.Strangulat indusus dolor, atque exaestuat intus. Ovid. Trist. lib. 5. That which was most offensive to us, a cause of fear and Grief, when we shall but impart it to some discreet, trusty, and loving friend, is instantly removed by his counsell, wisdom, perswasion, advice, good meanes, which we could not otherwise apply unto our selves. The simple narration many times easeth our distressed mind, and in the midst and greatest extremities,Senec. de tranq c. 7. Commincus. com. lib. 7. many have been relieved by exonerating themselves to a faithfull friend. And this is one cause why tears disperse heaviness, and diminish our paine: for when we pour forth teares, we cast out that which afflicts us, and emptying the humour which oppresseth us, and smothers us within, by this meanes we free our selves from an heavy burden which lay upon our hearts, by reason whereof our soul helping her self to cast out the enemy of our life, diverts and frees her self from the importune thought of Grief, and imploys her imagination to this divertisment, the which for this occasion is pleasing unto her. Another reason there is, for that it is a contentment to man, to do an act befitting the estate wherein he finds himself. So, as if amidst the mourning of our friends, we chance to laugh unadvisedly, when we enter into consideration with our selves, this lightness doth displease us, for that laughter agrees not well with mourning; And there is nothing doth accord and concurre better with the condition of miserable men then teares, wherefore they are pleasing unto them, and by consequent sweeten their torments.