The Sovereignty and Goodness of God, Part 12
The twelfth Remove.
It was upon a Sabbath-day-morning, that they prepared for their Travel. This morning j asked my maſter whither he would ſell me to my Huſband; he anſwered me Nux, which did much rejoyce my ſpirit. My miſtriſs, before we went, was gone to the burial of a Papoos, and returning, ſhe found me ſitting and reading in my Bible; ſhe ſnatched it haſtily out of my hand, and threw it out of doors; I ran out and catcht it up, and put it into my pocket, and never let her ſee it afterward. Then they packed up their things to be gone, and gave me my load: I complained it was too heavy, whereupon ſhe gave me a ſlap in the face, and bade me go; I lifted up my heart to God, hoping that Redemption was not far off: and the rather becauſe their inſolency grew worſe and worſe.
But the thoughts of my going homeward (for we bent our courſe) much cheared my Spirit, and made my burden ſeem light, and almoſt nothing at all. But (to my amazment and great perplexity) the ſcale was ſoon turned: for when we had gone a little way, on a ſudden my miſtriſs gives out, ſhe would go no further, but turn back again, and ſaid. I muſt go back again with her, and ſhe called her Sannup, and would have had him gone back alſo, but he would not, but ſaid, He would go on, and come to us again in three dayes. My Spirit was upon this, I confeſs, very impatient, and almoſt outragious. I thought I could as well have dyed as went back: I cannot declare the trouble that I was in about it; but yet back again I muſt go. As ſoon as I had an opportunity, I took my Bible to read, and that quieting Scripture came to my hand, Pſal. 46.10. Be still, and know that I am God. Which ſtilled my ſpirit for the preſent: But a ſore time of tryal, I concluded, J had to go through. My maſter being gone, who ſeemed to me the beſt, friend that I had of an Indian, both in cold and hunger, and quickly ſo it proved. Down I ſat, with my heart as full as it could hold, and yet ſo hungry that I could not ſit neither: but going out to ſee what I could find, and walking among the Trees, I found ſix Acrons, and two Cheſ-nuts, which were ſome refreſhment to me. Towards Night I gathered me ſome ſticks for my own comfort, that I might not ly a-cold: but when we came to ly down they bade me go out, and ly ſome-where-elſe, for they had company (they ſaid) come in more than their own: I told them, I could not tell where to go, they bade me go look; I told them, if I went to another Wigwam they would be angry, and ſend m… home again. Then one of the Company drew his ſword, and told me he would run me thorough if I did not go preſently. Then was I fain to ſtoop to this …ude fellow, and to go out in the night, J knew not whither. Mine eyes have ſeen that fellow afterwards walking up and down Boſton, under the appearance of a Friend-Indian, and ſeverall others of the like Cut. I went to one Wigwam, and they told me they had no room. Then I went to another, and they ſaid the ſame; at laſt an old Indian bade me come to him, and his Squaw give me ſome Ground-nuts; ſhe gave me alſo ſomething to lay under my head, and a good fire we had: and through the good providence of God, I had a comfortable lodging that night. In the morning, another Indian bade me come at night, and he would give me ſix Ground nuts, which I did. We were at this place and time about two miles from Connecticut River. We went in the morning to gather Ground nuts, to the River, and went back again that night. I went with a good load at my back for they when they went, though but a little way, would carry all their trumpery with them) I told them the skin was off my back, but J had no other comforting anſwer from them than this, That i… would be no matter if myhead were off too.