The Sacred Diary, Section 20 – Section 21
SECT. XX. Of Contrition.
WHen thou comeſt into the Preſence of God in the Morning, having conſidered the multitude of thy Sins, and ſeen thy ſelf over-charged with the burden of them, ſee that thou humble thy ſelf, and let thy Heart be pierced with Godly Sorrow, Contrition, and Compunction of Spirit: For the furtherance whereof, thou mayſt help thy ſelf with a very devout conſideration of an Ancient Father, which I ſhall ſet down with ſome little Variation.
Behold, I a vile Wretch, have greatly offended thy Divine Majeſty, I am afraid to lift up mine Eyes to Heaven; I deſire to ſtrike my ſelf with that Publican in the Goſpel, that God may be merciful to me a Sinner: I deſire to enforce my ſelf, and to take Arms againſt mine own Wickedneſs; and to judg my ſelf, that I may not be judged of the Lord. If my Bleſſed Lord and Saviour hath been ſo reproachfully handled for my ſake; If he hath ſuffered ſuch grievous Pains and Torments for the Sins that I have committed, why ſhould not I abaſe and abhor my ſelf, being the very Perſon that hath ſinned? I am he that hath deſpiſed Almighty God; I am he that hath endeavoured to crucifie afreſh the Son of God: And me-thinks that the whole frame of this World crieth out againſt me with open Mouth, ſaying▪ This is he that hath offended and deſpiſed our Common Lord: This is that wicked Wretch that hath rather been moved with the guileful Baits of the Devil, than with the great Benefits of Almighty God. This is he that could never be induced to Vertue and Goodneſs, with the Cords of Love, and ſweet entertainments of Almighty God, nor ever be afrighted with his terrible Threatnings, and dreadful Judgments. This is he that (ſo much as lieth in him) hath defaced the Power, Wiſdom, and Goodneſs of the Lord, and caſt Contempt upon them. This is he that hath been more afraid to offend a weak mortal Man, than that God that can caſt both Soul and Body into Hell. This is he that hath been more aſhamed to commit a filthy Act before a rude Country Peaſant, than before the Preſence of the All-ſeeing God. This is he that hath preferred the Dung and Droſs of the Earth before Heavenly Treaſures. Wherefore all Creatures do cry out againſt me, after this manner, and ſay, This is that lewd Caitiff that hath abuſed us all: For whereas he ought to have employed us in the Service, and to the Glory of our Creator; he hath made us to ſerve his Luſts, and the will and pleaſure of the Devil, perverting all ſuch things to the Injury and Reproach of the Creator, which he had created for his Service. His Soul was adorned with the Image of God, and he hath disfigured this Divine Image, and clothed it with our vile Image and Likeneſs; he hath been more earthy than the Earth it ſelf, more unſtable than the Water, more mutable than the Wind, more enflamed in his appetite than the Fire, more hardned than the Stone; more cruel to himſelf than the wild Beaſts, more ſpiteful and venemous againſt others than the Cockatrice: He hath neither feared God, nor regarded Man: He hath not been contented alone himſelf to be injurious to God; but would have many others to be partakers with him in ſinful Practices.
Now what ſhall be ſaid of his other abominable Practices? Such hath his Pride been, that he refuſed to be in ſubjection unto God; he would not ſubmit his Neck under the ſweet yoke of his Obedience, but would rather live as he liſted, and fulfil his own Will in every point, rebelling againſt the Lord, vexing his holy Spirit. How exceedingly was he enraged, if God did not grant him all his deſires, or if he ſent any Croſſes, or Troubles, for his Trial and Exerciſe: He loved to be applauded in all his doings, whether good or bad.
And now conſider, O my Soul, whether all Creatures may not juſtly cry out againſt thee, and ſay, Come, let us deſtroy this wicked Wretch from off the face of the Earth, that hath done ſo much wrong to our Creator. May not the Earth ſay, Why do I bear ſuch a cumberſome Wretch? May not the Water ſay, Why do I not drown him? May not the Fire ſay, Why do I not burn and conſume him? May not Hell ſay, Why do I not ſwallow him up, and torment him? Alas! miſerable Wretch that I am! What ſhall I do? Whither ſhall I go, ſeeing all Creatures are in Arms againſt me? Where ſhall I hide my Head? Who will receive me, who have offended all Creatures? The great God I have deſpiſed, the Angels I have grieved, the Saints I have diſhonoured, Men I have offended and ſcandalized, and all Creatures have I moſt wickedly abuſed. Whither then ſhall Iflie for ſhelter, for as much as I have made all things to become mine Enemies: I look round about me, and can ſee nothing that will take my part; yea, even mine own Conſcience barketh againſt me, and all my Bowels do accuſe me, and rent me in pieces.
Wherefore, weep continually, O my Soul, lament thy wretchedneſs like a poor miſerable Creature, never ceaſe weeping ſo long as thou liveſt in this Vale of miſery! be ſtill in expectation when thy merciful Saviour will vouchſafe to turn the Eyes of his Compaſſion towards thee; and with all poſſible humility and ſhame, caſt thy ſelf down at his Feet, and cry out, Oh! where can I find Puniſhment enough to be avenged on my ſelf, and Tears enough to waſh away mine offences? O Lord, I am that great Enemy of thine, which hath committed moſt wicked and abominable Offences before thy Face, I acknowledg my ſelf guilty before thee. I beſeech thee, O Lord, to caſt the Mantle of thy Mercy over me, thy poor, wretched, miſerable Creature, and let the greatneſs of thy Goodneſs overcome and cover my wickedneſs. Let the moſt ſweet loving Father rejoyce at the coming home again of his Prodigal Son: Let the good Shepherd rejoyce at the recovery of his loſt Sheep. Oh! how happy and joyful ſhall that Day be, when thou ſhalt caſt thine Arms about my Neck, and give me the ſweet embraces and kiſſes of Peace! I will now take Arms againſt my ſelf therefore, and be more cruel and rigorous againſt my ſelf than any other; I will loath and deſpiſe my ſelf, and from henceforth the face of Sin ſhall be more hideous to me than Hell; and I ſhall deſire to be deſpiſed and puniſhed of all Creatures, for as much as I have deſpiſed the Creator of them all. I am contented that all Diſhonours, Reproaches, and Puniſhments, do run upon me on every ſide, ſo that by them I may be brought to my moſt Sweet and Merciful Lord. And as for all Honour, Pleaſure, and Worldly Delights, they ſhall be quite baniſhed away from me, in ſo much as the very Names of them ſhall be heard no more in my Houſe; I will ſeek nothing elſe but the Honour of my Lord God, and the Contempt and Confuſion of my ſelf. Hitherto, or almoſt to this effect, are the words of that Devout and Ancient Father.
SECT. XXI. Of Family-Worſhip.
HEre I ſhall commend unto you the advice of a Reverend Divine of ours. Let Family-Worſhip be performed conſtantly and ſeaſonably, twice a Day, at that Hour which is freeſt from Interruptions, not delaying it without juſt cauſe. But whenſoever it is performed, be ſure it be Reverently, Seriouſly, and Spiritually done. If greater Duty hinder not, begin with a brief Invocation of God's Name, and craving of his Help and Bleſſing through Chriſt, and then reade ſome part of the holy Scripture in order; and either help the Hearers to underſtand and apply it: Or if you are unable for that, then read ſome profitable Book to them for ſuch ends, and earneſtly pour out your Souls in Prayer, &c. Pretend not neceſſity againſt any Duty, for it is but unwillingneſs, or negligence, that makes Men remiſs in Family-Worſhip. The lively and conſtant performance of Family-Duties, is a principal means to keep up the power and intereſt of Godlineſs in the World, all which decayeth when theſe grow dead, ſlight, and formal.
Thoſe Families wherein this Service of God is performed, are (as it were) little Churches, yea, even a kind of Paradiſe upon Earth. And for this purpoſe, Philem. 1, 2.St. Paul writing to Philemon, Greeteth the Church that is in his Houſe. And in like manner he ſendeth Salutations to the Church of Corinth from Aquila to Priſcilla, and the Church that was in their Houſe, 1 Cor. 16.19. On the other ſide, where Family-Worſhip is not uſed, but either for the moſt part, or altogether neglected, thoſe Families may be termed no better than Companies of prophane and graceleſs Atheiſts, who as they deny God in their Hearts, ſo they are deſcribed by this Note, That they do not call upon the Name of the Lord, Pſal. 14.4. And the Prophet prayeth thus unto God: Pour out thy Fury upon the Heathen that know thee not, and upon the Families that call not upon thy Name, Jer. 10.25.
Many Parents take care only to enrich their Children, to make them great and honourable in the World, to leave them large Portions and Eſtates, to provide rich Matches for them, but take no care to bring them up in the Nurture and Admonition of the Lord: Nay, many Parents are afraid their Children ſhould prove Religious: Some Parents cannot abide their Children, whom they ſee to look a little towards Sion. Such Parents (as one ſaith) are the Devil's Children. But every Parent ought to ſay of his Natural Children, as St. John doth of his Spiritual Children (Epiſt. 3.4.) I have no greater joy, than to hear that my Children walk in the Truth.