The Way to Sound and Saving Conversion, Part 7
The trials of Converſion by which a man may know whether he be converted yea or no.
LEt the Reader make a curious, narrow, impartial, diligent ſearch into his own ſoul, and ſee what humility, what ſelf-denial, what ſin-abhorrancy, what love to Chriſt, what delight in his ordinances, what zeal for Gods glory, what contempt of the world, what deſiring after the ſociety of the Saints, what ſympathiſing in their afflictions; and if thou findeſt any impreſſions of grace, any ſpiritual work, any ſaving, ſavoury diſtinguiſhing operation upon thy ſoul, and heart, then the Spirit hath been there with his cure, and thou art as certainly born again, as thou waſt born firſt; but theſe graces thus planted in the heart, at firſt are full of imperfections, there is ſome darkneſs with your light, ſome enmity with your love, much hardneſs of heart with your mourning for ſin, and much worldly ſorrow in your pureſt tears, much pride with your humility, much murmuring with your patience, and therefore great care is to be taken, in the laying down theſe trials, or marks of converſion, for as we are to put a difference, between gifts and grace, and internal and external marks and ſigns, ſo alſo we are to diſtinguiſh between thoſe that are ſtrong in grace, and thoſe that are weak in grace, that have but little grace, and this will be of great uſe to Chriſtians that are but of a lower forme; new converts, having but little grace, yet they may know that little they have, though as yet they have not attained ſtrength of grace, yet they may know the truth of grace in themſelves, although they come ſhort of ſtrong believers, yet they ſhall know they go beyond the moſt ſhining hypocrite; for the leaſt meaſure of grace, is better than the greateſt meaſure of gifts▪ But we come to the trials of the new birth, by which a man may know whether he is born again, yea or no.
1. He that is truly converted, doth deſire the word and means of grace, 1 Pet. 2. 2.
2. He is either willing, or willing to be made willing to do whatſoever the Lord doth command him, though it be never ſo contrary to fleſh and blood, Gal. 1. 16.
3. He is brought unto an unſeined hatred of the whole body of ſin, Rom. 7. 24. compared with, Philip. 3. 21.
4. His greateſt and hotteſt mournings and ſtrivings is againſt his inward pollution, his cloſe, ſpiritual and ſecret ſins, Pſal. 19. 12. compared with, Pſal. 90. 8.
5. He often mourns for the ſins of others, and for the want of growth in himſelf, Lam▪ 16. & 3. 48.
6. He doth love to be ſpeaking of thoſe great and ſaving truths, which his heart hath taken in, in the work of converſion.
7. He doth begin to keep a watch over his own heart.
8. He makes conſcience of keeping every known command.
9. He is willing to put himſelf upon the tryal, and to have any Chriſtian ſearch him, and ſometimes he intreats the Lord to ſearch him. Pſal. 139. 23. Lam. 3. 40.
10. He that is born again, or truly converted, ha…h his ſoul renewed in its faculties and vertues, &c.
Theſe are ſuch flowers of Paradiſe, that grows not in Natures garden, until the new man was put on, and the party renewed in the ſpirit of his mind, until Chriſt was formed in him; for theſe are pearls that are not to be found in the worlds field: wherefore we ſhall ſpeak ſomething to each of them briefly; but before I proceed further, let me give the Reader this caution: Let not every one think he is not converted, unleſs he finde theſe and the like characters of a true converſion in him, if he finde but ſomething of every thing, if it be but in the budding, in the breeding, in the beginning, his ſtate may be good; for when he is a well grown Chriſtian, theſe things will more and more clearly appear, at the firſt converſion a man hath as it were but the root of them, &c.
1. He that is indeed born againe, and ſo converted, doth deſire the word and means of grace, 1 Pet. 2. 2. as new born babes deſire the ſincere milk of the word, that they may grow thereby. There the apoſtle makes it a reſemblance of a ſpiritual man; a man ſpiritually new born will deſire after the meanes of grace, that he may grow in grace; by milk, is here meant the word of God, which is compared to milk, Firſt becauſe of the ſweetneſs of it. Pſal. 19. 10. and Pſal. 119. 103. Secondly becauſe of the purity of it, it is without falſhood, Pſal. 19. 18. and 119. 140, and Thirdly becauſe of the nouriſhing property thereof, 2 Tim. 3. 16, 17. When the Lord begets one by the immortal ſeed of his word, he teacheth him to reſt upon the word of promiſe which indureth for ever, tendred in the Goſpel; indeed tho whole word of God is ſincere milk whereby we grow, and the old and new Teſtament may be called the Breſts of conſolation; but if we grow not, it is becauſe we feed not, we play with the breaſt, &c.
2. He that is indeed born againe, he is either willing, or at leaſt willing that the Lord ſhould make him willing, to obſerve and do whatſoever the Lord doth command him, though it be never ſo contrary to fleſh and blood, Acts. 9. 9. Lord what will thou have me to do? How willing Paul was to lay down his firſt commiſſion, & to take up another: So Pſal. …10. 3, thy people ſhall be willing in the day of thy power. They are willing to hear, ſpeak Lord, for thy ſervant heareth; they are willing to do, Lord what wilt thou have me to do, Pſal. 119. 5. Oh that my waies were directed to keep thy ſtatutes. Again David ſets down another character of a godly man, Pſal. 1. 2. His delight is in the Law of the Lord, and Paul after converſion ſpeaks of himſelf, that his delight was in the Law of God, as concerning the inward man, So again in another Pſal. 40. 8. I delight to do thy will, thy Law is in my hear…; there was a principal within him agreeable to the precept without him, this is a clear demonſtration of a new creature, though he may drive heavily, ſometimes under vexing and laſting temptations.
3. He that is effectually converted, he i… brought unto an unfeined hatred of the whole body of ſin, eſpecially his beloved ſins, that did moſt powerfully captivate him before, Col. 3. 7, 8. But now you put off all theſe, anger, wrath, malice, blaſphemy, filthy communication, ſee 1 Corinth. 6. 11. compared with Titus 3. 3, 4, 5. &c. Nay further, he hath an unfeined hatred of the whole body of ſin, as it is the greateſt evil in the world; ſin is worſe than hell, there may be good in puniſhment, but there can be no good in ſin, it makes God hide his face from us, and ſhut out our prayers, Iſa. 59. 2. it is the cauſe of all wars, James 4. 1. it is the cauſe of all ſickneſs, Deut. 28. In a word, ſin is the cauſe of all miſery, both temporal, ſpiritual, and eternal, therefore Daniel was content to be thrown into the den of Lyons, rather than to ſin, the three Children in the fire, Paul and Silas into the priſon, and many Chriſtians have choſen to imbrace priſons, ſtakes, fire, and the hotteſt perſecutions rather than ſin, a converted perſon comes to ſee the weakneſs and wickedneſs of his own heart, he knows he cannot truſt any member alone without a guard.
4. He that is indeed converted may know it by this, viz. his greateſt and hotteſt conflicts are againſt inward pollution, his cloſe, ſpiritual, and ſecret ſins, that are known only to God and himſelf; he doth accuſe himſelf for that which no man can accuſe him, he blames himſelf for that which no man can blame him, he judgeth and arraigneth himſelf for that which no man can judge him for, he makes a through and ſound ſearch, he knows Hypocriſie is ſpun of a fine thred, and is not diſcerned without diligent ſearch: Again, he knows that one ſtab at the heart, though it be with a pen-knife, will kill a man, one little leak in a Ship will ſink it, and one ſecret ſin unrepented of, will damn a Soul, the leaſt ſin contains in it the nature of all ſin; no ſooner did one ſin enter into Adams heart but he had all ſin in him.
5. He often mourns for the ſins of others, and for the want of more grace in himſelf, we read Jer. 13. 17. that the Prophet did weep in ſecret places for the ſins of others; ſo in another place, mine eyes run down with tears, becauſe men keep not thy laws▪ &c. and as for the ſins of others, ſo for the want of more grace in themſelves, viz. Iſaiah 6. 5. I am a man of unclean lips ſaid Iſaiah. I abhor my ſelf in duſt and aſhes ſaid Job, Job. 42 6 Surely I am more brutiſh than any man, and have not the knowledge of a man, ſaid Augur, Pro. 30. 2. I am leſs than the least of all Saints ſaid Paul, Eph. 3. 8. nay I have ſo little grace, that I am the greateſt of Sinners, 1 Tim. 1. 15 Chriſt Jeſus came into the world to ſave ſinners, of whom I am chief.
6. He doth dearly love to be ever now and then ſpeaking of thoſe great and ſaving truths, which his heart took in the work of converſion, he feeleth moſt ſavour of life in thoſe neceſſary points which were inſtruments of this bleſſed change that there is made upon him, and upon theſe he feed…th and delighteth, even on the inward life of ſpiritual things, and ſo he feedeth his hungry Soul, in hearing and reading, praying and converſing with Chriſtians; he endeavours to learn ſomething from …very thing.
7. He doth begin to keep a watch over his own heart, eyes, and tongue and feet, &c.
1. He keeps his heart with Solomons diligence, Prov. 4. 24.
2. He keeps his eyes with Jobs Covenant, Job. 31. 1.
3. He keeps his tongue with Davids bridle, Pſalm 39. 7.
4. He keeps his foot with Solomons guard, Eccleſ. 5. 1. In a word, we ſhould not truſt any Member, without its Keeper, for there doth and will remain, even in the converted themſelves, the remnants of corruption, a body of death, a rebelling fleſh, and thi… will be ſtill tempting and draw them from God, ſo that the whole way to Heaven is a continual warfare; there be enemies that will diſpute every foot of the way, there is no going a ſtep forward, but as the ſhip doth in the Sea, by cutting its way through the waves: there is Self our greateſt enemy, and there is Sathan and the world, and almoſt all that we meet with in it, will prove hinderances in the way to Heaven, therefore keep up your watch with your loynes girt, and your lamps burning.
8. He that is truly converted makes conſcience of keeping every known duty or command, in reſpect of the general bent and frame of his heart he doth ſubject himſelf to Chriſt freely, univerſally, and conſtantly, and unweariedly, at leaſt in deſire▪ if it be not ſo, he could wiſh it were ſo, he endeavours & prays to have it ſo, he conſidereth, that Chriſt did not diſcharge us from the debt of ſin, to free us from the debt of ſervice, but therefore did he pay the one, that we might be able to return the other. Rom. 8. 12. Therefore we are Debters not to the ſleſh, 1 John 2. 5. Who ſo keepeth his word, in him is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that we are in him; there is no known ſin but he labours to avoid, and no known grace but he longs to have, and no known duty but he labours to perform.
9. He is willing to put himſelf upon the tryal, whether he be converted or no, he is willing to have any Chriſtian to ſearch him, and ſometimes he entreats the Lord to ſearch him, he loves thoſe company beſt that deals moſt plainly with him, he carefully and continually ſearcheth himſelf, and goes down with light into his heart, he is jealous of his own heart, he doubts of none more than himſelf, ſuſpects moſt his own graces, and the witneſſe of his own ſpirit, leaſt Sathan ſhine like an Angel of light, and ſay it is the teſtimony of Gods ſpirit, he is content to have his ſpiritual eſtate tryed by any, not only by a ſearching Miniſtry in publick, but by any private Friends; he opens his heart freely for others to ask, and gives anſwers of his hope with weakneſſe and fear, his ears are open to the whole word▪ he believes the threatnings and trembles, he fears alſo the promiſes, leſt he comes ſhort, he hath found out the hell in his heart, and feels the flames of it in ſecret, he hath found an emptineſs in himſelf, and an enmity to all good, he is poor in ſpirit, which appears by his continual complaints, and importunat prayers, he deſireth not to be found in his own righteouſneſs, but in Chriſts righteouſneſs, all the reſt he accounts as dung.
10. He that is born again, or truly converted, hath his ſoul renewed in its faculti…s and vertues, when the Lord made man in his own image Gen. 1. 26, 27. Gen. 9. 6. which image of God in man conſiſteth not in any bodily ſhape, but in the nature of the ſoul, as it is a ſpiritual and immortal ſubſtance, indued with three faculties▪ Underſtanding, Will and Memory, as the Deitie hath three, Father, Sonne and Holy Ghoſt, this image of God in man, by his fall was defaced, which by regeneration is again reſtored and renewed.
1. In its faculties. 2. In its ſenſes. 3 In its vertues.
1. In its faculties,
1. Underſtanding.
2. Will.
3. Memory▪
1. The Underſtanding, that by the fall was darkened, is now again by regeneration …nlightened, Epheſ. 5. 8. Compared with Epheſ. 1. 18.
2. The Will that was inthralled, is now renewed, by which it doth chooſe the good, and reject the evil.
3. The Memory, that ſince the fall of Man would forget the good that it ſhould have reteyned▪ and retein the evill that it ſhould forget, is now reſtored, ſo as to treaſure up ſpiritual things, and let ſlip carnal things.
The Conſcience, which is Gods Deputy in man, that did ceaſe to do his Office being ſeared with an hot Iron, 1 Tim. 4. 2. is now awakened, and ſits as Judge overall your Actions, accuſing in one thing, excuſing in another; now if Conſcience he not a Bridle, it will be a Whip, if it be not a Curb, i… will be a Scourge, if you will not hear the Warnings you ſhall feel the Laſhes▪ if it doth not reſtrain from Sin by admonition, it will put u… to pain in ſin by Contrition.
The Senſes alſo they come to be exerciſed, Heb. 5. 14. to diſcern both good and evil▪ the Senſe of Hearing is frequently exerciſed in hearing the joyfull ſound; and the Senſe of Seeing is exerciſed in beholding the wonderfull works of God; and the Senſe of Smelling is exerciſed, ſmelling a ſweet ſavour in Chriſt, and all his wayes; and ſo for the reſt of the Senſes, they are ever now and then exerciſed about ſpiritual things.
The Vertues of the Soul, or graces of the Spirit, they begin alſo to be employ…d about matters of great concernment, viz. Faith endeavours to believe, and lay hold on God for what he hath promiſed; Hope anchors upon the promiſe, and waits with patience for a ſupply of all its wants; Love is exerci…d in loving of God▪ his Ordinances and People, and ſometimes in doing good to his enemies; Prudence i… a ver… whereby we foreſee how things ar… to be done▪ in reſpect of time, place, and m…nner, and what will be the event of each b… ſineſs which is undertaken▪ prudence in our hearts to guide our thoughts, and in our mouths, to order our ſpeeches; it is prudence in the evils of ſin to chooſe none, and in the evils of puniſhment to chooſe the leſſer, 2 Sam. 24. 12.
Another Vertue which begins to be exerciſed, is Temperance, which moderates our deſires, and brings the Appetite under a rule of reaſon; then Conſtancy or Perſeverance is another Vertue, whereby a man is reſolved to perſevere to the end in the knowledge, profeſsion, and worſhip of God; Juſtice is another Vertue, which giveth every man his due, it binds us to give due to God, to our Parents, and Kindred, and to exerciſe Verity and Equity in all that we do; lo what a wonderfull change is here! yet notwithſtanding all this, the Soul is the ſame after converſion as it was before, and ſo it ſhall be after the reſurrection the ſame: there being the ſame faculties, only thus changed, the Soul, is renewed and reſtored to its primitive inſtitution, and ſo its purity and bleſſedneſſe is or ſhall be greater than ever it was before, &c.
Thus the Regenerate doth partake of another begetting, of another birth, of another nature, that a man ſhould be the ſame, and not the ſame, the ſame man for Body, yet as different in quality, as if another ſoul did dwell in the ſame body; he of a lyon, i… become a lamb, of a wolfe, a ſheep, of a Saul, a Paul, of a perſecuter, a friend of the perſecuted; here is a bleſſed change indeed, Wouldſt thou know whether thou art regenerated, art thou one whom God hath enlightned? art thou one whom he▪ hath called? art thou one who art waſhed, purged, renewed, ſanctyfied? examine thy heart throughly, deceits lie low, and falſe evidence is the fruit of a ſlight ſearch; Art thou one whoſe heart is taken with Chriſt▪ when God delights in us, thereupon we come to delight in him, God knows us, and thereupon we come to know him, John. 10. 14. God apprehends us, and thereupon we come to apprehend him, he chuſeth us, and thereupon we chuſe him, he loves us, and therefore we love him▪ 1 John. 4. 19. his heart is taken with us, and thereupon we come to be taken with him: take thy evidences from the carriage of thy ſpirit, neither at the beſt, nor at the worſt, but the middle way, which is moſt thy frame; for if thou look upon thy ſelf at the worſt, thou mayſt be diſcouraged, if at the beſt, thou mayſt be deceived, neither judg of thy ſelf by particular actions, but look upon the univerſal frame and ben… of thy ſpirit, art thou heavy laden with the weight of thy offences? doſt thou groan under the yoak and tyrannie of manifold temptations, Come unto me, ſaith Chriſt, I will refreſh the, Mat. 11. 28. Doeſt thou thirſt after the wayes of grace, loe I am the living ſpring, ſaith Chriſt, Come drinks, h…r… is my blood that was ſhed for many for the remiſſion of ſinnes? are the wounds of thy tranſgreſſions ſo deep, that they …annot be ſearched, or ſo old, that they corrupt and pur…fie? loe here is the good Samaritan, that will either eind them up, or powr in oyle and wine: are there any ſeeds of true life began? is there any motion of repentance in thy ſoul? will thy pulſe of remorſe heat a little? haſt thou but a touch of ſorrow, a ſpark of contrition, a grain of faith, a drop of ſelf denyal? ſurely he that hath began this good work, will finiſh it? Philip. 1. 6. Surely he will more and more inform thy mind, conform thy will, reform thy life, and tran…form the whole man into the likeneſs of the heavenly patterne, a man that is born again may be weak in reſpect of life, in whom the ſpirit breath… though feintly, whoſe pulſe beats but feebly, whoſe heart pants after Chriſt but weakly, in whom Chriſt, who is the wiſdome of the father, ſhines, though through many clouds very dimly, who indeed re…ives Chriſt and his free g…, though with a ſhaking hand, who hopes that Chriſt will not caſt him off, though not ſure he will take him up, he hath a deſire to fear the name of the Lord: h… hath a willing mind, 2 Cor. 8. 12, and this is acceptable with the Lord, a will to obey the Lord, is all that a bleſſed Paul can ſometimes find, Rom. 7. 18. One may be a babe in Chriſt though carnal. 1 Cor. 3. …. and I brethren could not ſpeak unto you as unto ſpiritual, bu… as unto carnal, even as unto babes in Chriſt; or as ſome rendreth the word, as unto ſucklings in Chriſt. To cloſeup this, conſider, one drop of water is for the quality, the ſame as the whole Ocean Sea, one grain of gold, is as pure gold as a whole mountain of gold, the leaſt bud by the ſide of a great tree, draws ſap from the ſame root that the greateſt limb or branch doth; So the leaſt meaſure of grace, is as true grace, as the greateſt meaſure; it is as pure for the quality, though not ſo much for the quantity. Our ſalvation depends upon the truth of grace, our conſolation depends upon the degree… of grace.