The Vanity of the Lives and Passions of Men, Chapter 6

The Vanity of the Lives and Passions of Men · Chapter 6

p. 97CHAP. VI.

Of the vanity of the paſsion of love.

AS after a hard winter, the Sun is not onelyonly ſeen to give a new life to all the Vegetative, Senſitive, and rational Creatures upon earth; but alſo by the heat of his beams to penetrate the p. 98very bowels of the earth, for to purifie the inſenſible creatures from their droſs, as the ſilver, gold, and precious ſtones; even ſo after mens paſsions have by their natural commotions, clouded their mindes with a Winter of anxiety and ſorrow: ſupernatural Love, doth not onelyonly revive their Spirits, but doth alſo purifie them from the droſs that theſe perturbations had left behinde them in their ſouls. Love being then the moſt noble paſsion of men, it is fit it ſhould have the precedency in theſe Diſcourſes, ſith without love all humane ſociety ſhould be extinguiſhed, and by it men deprived of all content and comfort in this life; for the greateſt comfort that men can attain to in this vale of Tears, is to have a conſtant friend, or a faithful conſort, in whoſe breſt they may confide their greateſt ſecrets, and be partaker with them of their proſperity, honor, and glory, or ſympathize with them in their afflictions and miſeries. It is recorded that Fpamonides, the Commander in Chief of the Thebanes, a man as free from vain-glory as any one we read of, did not glory in any thing but in this,See Plutarch in his Mo…is. that his father was living, when he won three famous battels againſt the p. 99Lacedemonians, that were then held for their valour to be invincible, regarding more the content and honor that his father (whom he loved intirely) ſhould receive of it, then his own; and certainly the greateſt fruit that men can receive of their proſperity, is, when their friends rejoyce and partake of it, and the greateſt comfort they can have in their afflictions, is when they are aſſured to have friends that ſympathize with their miſeries. Now the paſsion of Love being of ſuch concernment, I will for the better deſcription of it ſpeak in order of theſe particulars: firſt, of the definition of Love: ſecondly, of the eſſentiall cauſe of Love: thirdly, of the variety or kinds of Love: fourthly, of the end or intereſt of mens Love: fifthly, of the qualities required in men for to obtain Love: ſixthly, of the good, and bad effects of Love: ſeventhly, of the Love of God towards men: eighthly, of the Love of men to God.

Firſt, Love is nothing elſe but to wiſh good to another, not for mens own intereſt, Definition of love according to Ariſtotle, and Senault.but for the good and merit of the party beloved, to whom men are to procure all the good and content that ſhall be in their power. Upon which definition obſerve theſe four Particulars: p. 100firſt, that Love doth ever unite the Heart and Will of men to the party beloved; And therefore the ancients ſaid commonly that Alexander and Epheſtion had but one ſoul in two diſtinct bodies, becauſe their joy and glory, ſorrow or diſgrace was mutuall to them both: ſecondly, Mens love is not to be grounded upon the pleaſure or profit they may receive by them they ſeem to love; for it can be no love, except their love be grounded upon the vertues and merits of the party beloved: thirdly, Lovers are to wiſh and procure the good and honor of their beloved, and to require nothing of them but what they may do with honor and equity: fourthly, The goods and lives of men are to be at the diſpoſing of the party beloved, Honor, Religion, and Loyalty onelyonly excepted, for true friendſhip doth not oblige men to blemiſh their honor, rack their conſcience, nor to betray their Prince at the requeſt of their beloved, becauſe theſe requeſts are beyond the bounds of love, which is only to be confined within the limits of Vertue;See Plutarch in his Moralls. and therefore the ancient Moraliſt highly commends this ſaying of a Heathen, who ſaid to his friend, who did require him to p. 101perjure himſelf, I am, ſaith he, thy friend untill the Altar: and the like anſwer was given to Charls Duke of Burbon, See Du Belay Commentaries,when he did intreate his noble friends, to ſide with him againſt his and their natural Prince, Francis the firſt, King of France.

Secondly, The cauſe of Love is conceived by ſome to be a ſympathy, or natural inclination that inticeth men to love one man before another, for it is often ſeen, that when a man comes in the company of other men he never had ſeen before, he will affect one of that company more then any of the reſt, which proceeds, ſay they, from a ſympathy of affections that is between theſe two men. Others conceive that the cauſe of Love doth conſiſt in the influence of the Planets, and for proof of their Opinions ſay, that the love of Achilles to Patroclus, See Homer. See Quintius Curtius.and of Alexander to the Amazon Queen, was becauſe they were born under one and the ſame Planet. Others conceive the cauſe of Love to be the intimate converſation and familiarity of the parties, which by an habit and cuſtom begets love between them. Others conceive that the goodneſs and beauty of the object is the cauſe of love; and with theſe I concur in p. 102Opinion, for God who is the Beauty and Goodneſs it ſelf, is certainly the eſſential cauſe of true love.

Thirdly, All ſorts of love may be compriſed under natural and ſupernatural, the natural hath divers branches, that may all be reduced under the love of Intereſt, and the love of Friendſhip, of which I ſhall ſpeak hereafter, when I have ſet forth the Opinion of thoſe, who maintain there is five ſeverall ſorts of Love: firſt, the love of the innanimate creatures: ſecondly, the love of the ſenſitive creatures: thirdly, the love of the rational creatures: fourthly, the love of Angels: fifthly, the love of God: firſt, The love of the innanimate creatures, is apparent in the proſecution of the perfection of their beeing, the light ones aſcending upwards, and the heavy ones deſcending downwards, as to their center: ſecondly, The love of the ſenſitive creatures, is an impreſſion wrought by the ſenſes in their imagination, by the objects it conceives to beuſeful unto them, which begetteth a deſire to injoy them; and this paſsion is not onelyonly incident to the bruit creatures, but alſo to the rational, who are overcome by the ſenſitive appetite: thirdly, The love of p. 103the reaſonable creatures ſhould be guided by Reaſon, becauſe it is inlightned by the Underſtanding, the ſeat of the rational power of the ſoul: but becauſe the Senſitive power doth oftentimes get the maſtery, it ſtraies from its right end, that is properly to endeavor to attain to the ſupream good, the very end why men were created; but ſince Adams fall men are carried away by the violence of their paſſions to greater inconveniencies and dangers then they which ride upon untamed Colts, their love being no more a temperate motion of their Will, but an effect of their paſſions: fourthly, The love of Angels doth far excel the love of men, becauſe they are the bleſſed Spirits, attending day and night before the Throne of God, to execute his Will and Pleauſure, and ſpecially to protect his Elect; now as the onelyonly object of their love is God, who is the perfection of Beauty and Goodneſs, their love muſt of neceſſity be more excellent then the love of the reaſonable creatures: fifthly, The love of God towards mankinde, for excellency is ſo ſuperlative over the love of men and Angels, that it will admit of no compariſon, his beeing infinite and theirs finite, and p. 104therefore I will deſiſt to ſpeak of it at this preſent: for the Love I am to ſpeak of, is the love of Intereſt, and the love of Friendſhip.

Fourthly, The end and Intereſt of mens Love is of a large extent: for many do ſeem to love ſuch that can prefer them, to the injoyment of honors, riches, and pleaſures: but the Love grounded upon theſe ſandy foundations, is but a fained and mercenary love: Sejanus the Favorite of the Emperor,See Tacitus, Suetonius, and Dion. Tiberius was adored as the morning Sun is by the Indians, by the greateſt Senators and men of war of the Empire, as long as he was in favor and could prefer his Clients to places of honor or gain, but as ſoon as he fell in diſgrace, they became his greateſt perſecutors. Haman the Favorite of King Ahaſuerus was worſhipped by the Officers that ſate at the Kings gate, Mordecai onelyonly excepted, but when he fell into diſgrace, theſe very Officers informed the King that he had erected a gibbit of fifty cubits to hang upaaEſther 3.2. and 7.9.Esth 3:2Esth 7:9 Mordecai; upon which information the King commanded, they ſhould inſtantly hang Haman upon the ſame gibbit, and having readily performed this command, the ſaid men pillaged p. 105his houſe and rich moveables. If Love be grounded upon Beauty, it cannot be of any continuance; what is more ſubject to accidents then Beauty? the Meaſles, the ſmall Pox, or old Age, will disfigure the greateſt Beauty. But the love of true friendſhip, having no other object then the vertue and merit of the beloved party remaineth permenant, and rather increaſeth then diminiſheth by age. But ſome will object, Many in theſe days that profeſs to be our greateſt friends, are our greateſt enemies, how ſhall we then be able to diſtinguiſh theſe counterfeit friends from the reall: They may be diſcerned by theſe evidences: firſt, if they rejoyce when thou rejoyceſt, and mourn when thou mourneſt, not in ſhew but in heart: ſecondly, If they are as ſerviceable in thy adverſity as in thy proſperity, for if they reſpect thee in proſperity, and reject thee in thy poverty, they are but fained friends: thirdly, If they are as eaſily invited to a ſimple Meal, as to a great Banquet, for there are too many Table-friends in theſe days: if they love thoſe thou loveſt, and hate thoſe thou hateſt, for otherwiſe their affections do not ſympathize with thine, and there can be no p. 106true love where an antipathy of affections raigns: fifthly, If the defamation of thy honor, or good name be as tender unto them as it is to thee; and whether they will be as apt to vindicate the ſame when opportunity ſerve as thou wilt, for otherwiſe thou canſt not be dear unto them, who make no account of thy infamy: ſixthly, If they take in good part thy reproofs, and acknowledg them to proceed from thy love to them, rather then from a cenſorious auſterity: many other Evidences might be given, but theſe ſhall ſerve for brevity ſake.

Fifthly, the qualities required in men to obtain Love are numerous; for Ariſtotle in his Phyſ. makes mention of fifteen, and yet there be many more, but Piety, Vertue, Goodneſs and Beauty are four of the principal: firſt, Piety draws the love of God as the Adamant ſtone draws the Needle; and ſuch as are honored with the love of God are bleſſed, and need not fear the hatred of men, For if God be with us, who ſhall be againſt us? ſecondly, Vertue is ſuch a Jewel, that all men and women that are endowed with Vertue are never without lovers, nay, their very enemies love them: Tilligny p. 107for his rare Vertues was reſcued from death by his greateſt enemies at the maſſacre of Paris: thirdly,See the French Hiſtory in the life of Charis the ninth. Goodneſs is a dependency of Piety and Vertue; for goodneſs is to them as the ſhadow is to the body, and therefore it is never without lovers: fourthly, Beauty, although it be but a fading gift of Nature, hath notwithſtanding more lovers then any of the former, for men are bewitched by the raies of Beauty; the comlineſs and beauty of Abſolom inſnared the love of David unto him, and although he had neither Piety, nor Vertue, it made him cry outbbSam. 18.33. O Abſolom, Abſolom, Abſolom my ſon, would to God I had died for thee: fifthly, ſuch as execute unpartial Juſtice are beloved of all men, as Ariſtides and Fabritius: ſixthly, Valour makes men to be beloved, if they imploy the ſame for to free their Native Countrey from oppreſſion, as Jepthy and Gedion: ſeventhly, Liberal men are beloved, as Mecaenas was of all the learned men of his time: eighthly, Grateful men are beloved, for ingratitude is abhorred of God and men, for the very bruit beaſts are grateful to their benefactors, witneſs the gratitude of the Lyon towards the Roman Slave, who ſaved his p. 108life for curing of his paw:See Livius in his 1. Decade. ninthly, Peacemakers are beloved, as Mamercus was for reconciling the People with the Patricians: tenthly, Godly and Religious men that conſtantly ſtand to their Principles, are beloved, as Athanaſius, for although he was exiled divers times, yet was he ever protected, and found friends whereſoever he came: eleventhly, Merciful men are beloved,See the Hiſtory of France. as Ceſar was for his clemency: twelfthly, The cheriſhers of Learning are beloved, as was Francis the firſt, King of France: thirteenthly, Men of a ſweet, pleaſant, and complying converſation are beloved, as Epheſtion was of Alexander: fourteenthly, Men free from diſſimulation, who ſpeak what they think to be good for their native Country are beloved,See Tacitus. as Tracia was in Veſpaſians days: fifteenthly, Men love courteous and ſerviceable men that are ready to befriend them upon all occaſions, and by this Abſolom cc2 Sam. 15.6.2 Sam 15:6ſtole the hearts of the people of Iſrael from his father. Divers other qualities might be produced which abſtract Love from others, but theſe ſhall ſerve for this time.

Sixthly, The effects of Love are either Good or Bad, according to the end of it, p. 109for if the end of mens Love be Good, the effects of it are always comfortable; but if the end of their Love is to ſatisfie their luſt, it is always deſtructive and fatall; and ſo proved the love ofddGen. 34.2.Gen 34:2 Sechem to Dinah, and the loveee2 Sam. 13.14, 28. Homers Illiades. Livius Decade 1. lib. 2.2 Sam 13:142 Sam 13:28 of Amnon to his ſiſter Tamar, and the rape of Helen by Paris was the cauſe of the ruine of Troy: the Rape of Lucretia by Tarquinus, was the cauſe that Rome from a Monarchy fell into a Democracy: the violence committed by theffJudg. 19.25.Judg 19:25 Gibeathites to the Levit's Concubine, was the cauſe of the death of fourty thouſand Iſraelites, and almoſt of the utter ruine of the whole Tribe of Benjamin; and the love of Antonius to Cleopatra was the cauſe of their lamentable end; but ſith a volume would not contain all the examples that might be produced of the evil effects of luſt, varniſhed over with the name of Love: I will now ſpeak of the effects of true Love: firſt,See Plutarch in the two young Graccus lives. The love of Tiberius Graccus towards his vertuous wife Cornelia was ſuch, as he ſlew the male Serpeut, and ſpared the femall, on purpoſe that he might ſave her life by the loſs of his own: ſecondly, The love of Antonio Perez's wife to him was ſuch, as ſhe ventured her own life to ſave p. 110his:See the Spainſh Hiſtory in the raign of Philip the ſecond. thirdly, The love of Portia, daughter to famous Cato, and wife to Martius Brutus, was ſo vehement and paſſionate, that being informed of his death at the battell of Philippi, See B…utus life in Appian.ſhe ſmothered her ſelf by caſting a handful of burning coles into her mouth: fourthly, The love of Artemiſa Queen of Caria towards her beloved husband Mauſolus, was ſo violent, that being dead,See Plutarchs Morals. it could not ſuffer his body to have any other grave then her own bowels, for ſhe cauſed the ſame to be burned, and drank a portion of his aſhes at every meal in commemoration of their conſtant love:See the Italian Hiſtory. fifthly, The love of an Italian Gentleman to his betrothed Miſtreſs is to be commended, for hearing ſhe had been taken at ſea by ſome Pirats of Tunis, and ſold for a Slave, he went over into Africa, and redeemed her with an incredible ſum of money: ſixthly, The incredible love and fidelity of Damon and Pythias, two Sicilian Noble men is to be admired; for Dionyſius the Elder, King, or Tyrant of Syracuſe, having upon ſome jealouſie of ſtate, cauſed Damon to be caſt into priſon, and to be condemned to death, Damon preſented a petition unto him, deſiring to have leave for p. 111eight days to go into the Countrey to ſet his houſhold in order,See old Dioniſius life. promiſing to return; Dionyſius granted the ſame, upon this condition, that ſome other Noble man of his means and degree, ſhould bail him body for body, and life for life, and ſhould remain in durance untill the day appointed for his return: Pythias his intimate friend bailed him of his free accord, and yeelds himſelf priſoner in Damons ſtead; but the day being come, and almoſt the hour appointed at hand, and Damon not appearing; Dionyſius began to deride Pythias for his credulity of the conſtancy of his friend, yet before the hour went out, Damon came in and preſented himſelf to the King, deſiring his friend might be diſcharged; at whoſe love, fidelity and conſtancy; Dionyſius was ſo aſtoniſhed, that he ſet them both at liberty, and required to be accepted for the third of their ſociety; yet all theſe admirable effects of Love are as much inferior to the Love of God towards man, as the finite is inferior to the infinite, as it will appear by the inſuing Diſcourſe.

Seventhly, The Love of God towards men is altogether incomprehenſible, as it will appear by theſe expreſſions of the p. 112bleſſed Spirit, For God, ſaith St. Iohn ggIoh. 3.6.John 3:6ſo loved the world that he gave his onelyonly begotten Son, that whoſoever believeth in him ſhould not periſh but have eternal life: and Chriſt ſaith himſelf,hhIoh. 10.10.John 10:10 That he is the good Shepherd, who hath given his life for his ſheep: And St. Iohn ſaith,ii1 Ioh 4 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 141 John 4:71 John 4:81 John 4:91 John 4:101 John 4:111 John 4:121 John 4:131 John 4:14 Beloved, let us love one another, for love cometh of God, and every man that loveth is born of God: he that loveth not knoweth not God, for God is Love. In this was manifeſted the love of God towards us, becauſe that God ſent his onelyonly begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and ſent his Son to be the propitiation for our ſins: Beloved, if God ſo loved us, we ought alſo to love one another: no man hath ſeen God at any time; if we love one another God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us: hereby know we that we dwell in him, and he in us, becauſe he hath given us of his ſpirit. And we have ſeen, and do teſtify, that the Father ſent the Son to be the Saviour of the world. Theſe words of St. Iohn, and divers others to the later end of this Chapter do confirm the Point, that Gods Love is the Adamant ſtone that draweth our love to him, and that we cannot of our ſelves p. 113love him before he be pleaſed to love us.

Eighthly, As for the love of man towards God, it comes infinitely ſhort of Gods love towards them; for if any love God, it is a gift of his free grace, and God hath loved his elect before the creation of the world; and St. Paul, aaRom. 9.13Rom 9:13doth give us a clear inſtance for it, Rom. 9.13. For God, ſaith he, loved Jacob, and hated Eſau from their mothers womb: and the heart ofbb1 Sam. 13.14.1 Sam 13:14 David was framed after Gods own heart, and that is the reaſon why this holy man hath ſuch rare expreſſions in his Pſalms of his unfained love towards God. And to confirm the choiſe and election of Gods faithful ones, we have divers inſtances of it in his Word: for Moſes ccNumb. 16.5.Num 16:5was a choſen ſervant of the Lord, as it appears by theſe words; Even him whom he hath choſen will he cauſe to come near unto him. And Aaron ddDeut. 18.5.Deut 18:5was a choſen ſervant of the Lord, as appears, Deut. 18.5. And Cyrus King of Perſia, eeIſai. 44.28.Isa 44:28was a choſen ſervant of the Lord, to execute his will, as it appears Iſai. 44.28. And St. Paul ffAct. 9.15.Acts 9:15was a choſen veſſel of the Lord, as it appears, Act 9.15. But the Lord ſaid unto him, Go thy way, for he is a choſen veſſel unto me, to bear my name p. 114fore the Gentiles and Kings, and the children of Iſrael: Now this incomparable love of God towards St. Paul in converting of him, to become from a perſecutor, one of the greateſt inſtruments of Gods glory that ever was, did kindle in his breſt ſuch a flame of fervent love towards God,ggPhil. 1.23.Phil 1:23 that he often deſired to be diſſolved and to be with Chriſt, and wiſhedhhRom. 9 3.Rom 9:3 himſelf accurſed from Chriſt for the increaſe of Gods glory, confirming our bleſſed Saviours ſaying,iiLuke 7.47.Luke 7:47 For he loveth much to whom much is forgiven, as appeared by Mary Magdalen: And the Prophet David, kk2 Sam. 12.13.2 Sam 12:13who after the pardon of his two abhorred ſins of Adultery and Murder, did ſo fervently love God, that all his delight was to meditatellPſal. 1.1, 2.Ps 1:1Ps 1:2 day and night in his Law, and to magnifie his love towards him,mmPſal. 18.1. Pſal. 116.12.Ps 18:1Ps 116:12 as it appears in the 18. Pſaim, ver. 1. I will love thee, O Lord my ſtrength: and in Pſal. 116. ver. 1. I love the Lord becauſe he hath heard my voyce and my ſupplications; becauſe he hath enclined his ear unto me, therefore will I call upon him as long as I live. To conclude, Carnal love is but vanity and vexation of ſpirit, but the love of God towards man, and the love of man towards God, doth fill their hearts with joy and comfort p. 115fort in this life, and will crown their ſoul with eternal glory in the life to come.