Of Peace and Contentment of Mind, Book 5
OF PEACE AND CONTENTMENT OF MIND.
FIFTH BOOK. Of Peace in Society.
CHAPTER. I. Of Concord with all men, and of Meekneſſe
OUr firſt Book hath bin imployed about the Peace of man with God, The three following about the peace of man with himſelfe. To confirme himſelfe in theſe, his next care muſt be to have peace with his owne kind. For in vaine ſhould we hope to keepe peace with God and our owne ſelves, if we live in wilfull diſcord with our neighbours; theſe are things altogether inconſiſtent. If a man ſay, I love God and hateth his brother, he is a lyar; for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath ſeene, how can he love God whom he hath not ſeene? and if a man be at odds with God and his brother, how can he have peace at home?
We are commanded to follow peace with all men. Heb. 12.14. Which becauſe it is more eaſy to follow then to obtaines the Apoſtle St. Paul prepares us to meet with oppoſition by theſe termes, If it be poſſible, as much as lyeth in you, live peaceably with all men. Rom. 12.18. Now what lyeth in us (with Gods aſſiſting grace) to live peaceably with all men, is expreſt in two counſels in the words next before, The firſt is to recompenſe no man evill for evill. It is impoſſible to go through the croud of the world and not to be thruſt. Fooles returne the like and thruſt againe, and thruſting brings ſtriking; The wiſe paſſe quiet and unconcerned. As we muſt beare one with another for Gods ſake that commands it, we muſt do it for our own ſake to keep tranquillity of mind; the loſſe whereof cannot be recompenced by any ſatisfaction of revenge, if revenge ever brought any. Moſt part of injuries conſiſting in opinion the remedy conſiſteth in the ſame. They hurt not him that reſents them not. Injuriarum remedium eſt oblivio. But if the injury bee ſuch that we muſt needs reſent it, Pardoning is the beſt reſenting, and the honorableſt revenge of all is, To recompence good for evill.
The other counſell is, Provide things honeſt in the ſight of all men. For whether we live with good or bad men, which are the greater number, it were impoſſible for us to compaſſe all our deſignes if they were layd open in the ſight of all men, they muſt be ſo honeſt that when they are ripe for the knowledge of all men we need not be aſhamed of them. And if in the following of honeſt and beneficial deſignes we meete with oppoſition, we muſt behave ourſelves with ſo much meekenes that we make it appeare that we ſeeke not our advantage by the ruine of others, and together with ſo much vigour that none be encouraged by our puſillanimity to croſſe us.
There is no harder taſke then to keepe ourſelves free from diſſention in this age; which may be called the reigne of diſcord. Here then wee muſt beſtow the greater care to keep tranquillity in our converſation, and more in our minde.
As for publique quarrels, a wiſe man will wedde himſelfe to no party with eagernes; and if it be poſſible, he will looke upon the game, and himſelfe neither play nor bet. He will leave the zeale of State to them that hold themſelves unworthy to be exempted from common diſtreſſes. He will remember that he is a citizen of a better countrey then that where he was borne. Who ſo takes a great intereſſe in publique affaires, ſheweth thereby that he hath a great love to the world, and eſteemes it more then it is worth; for we may be ſure that, which party ſoever prevaile, fooles will prevaile, for ſuch are all men, and in the commotion of a State, as of a muddy river, the mire and foame will alwayes be the uppermoſt. If it be paſt our power to part them, let them fight it out, and let our part be to looke with judgement and compaſſion how the vials of Gods wrath are powred firſt upon the minds of men to confound them with a fierce and blind impetuoſity, whereby they runne and prey one upon another, & next upon Empires & ſtates to turne them upſide downe. Of which an image is repreſented in the ſixteenth Chapter of the Revelation where a viall is powred upon the Sunne whereby he is made hot and ſcorching beyond meaſure, and preſently another vial is powred upon the ſeat of the Beaſt, wherewith his kingdome is filled with darknes, and infeſted with ſore and ſmarting plagues. For a mans ſpirit is within him that which the Sunne is in the world. When the ſpirits of a people are kindled with a malignant heate, a darke confuſion of the State and the miſeries of the particular members of it will follow. That man is bleſſed who in ſuch an epidemical turbulent heat, keepes the meekenes and ſerenity of his mind. And although it be hardly poſſible for him not to be carried away by the ſtreame of that party where his private intereſſes happen to be engaged, yet he keeps his ſoul free, heavenly, peaceable charitable to his greateſt enemies, and praying for them that perſecute him.
In all times and places a wiſe Chriſtian will abhorre warre. It is the very empire of the Devill; and in nothing ſo much doth he ſhew himſelfe the Prince of this world. It is the diſcipline of robbery and murder. It is the deep gulfe of all miſery. It is the ſinck of all wickedneſſe and vilany. Yet the beſt men are often engaged in it even out of conſcience & duty, for every one oweth his life to the defence of his Country. But for one to love the trade of Manbutcher, and delight in the hunting of man his owne kind, as others do in the hunting of the wolfe or wild boare, is an unnaturall barbarouſneſſe, not valour. Who ſo will keep the integrity and ſerenity of his conſcience, and hopeth for the ſalvation of his ſoul, muſt keep himſelfe free from that inhumane inclination, the true image of Satan, who was a murtherer from the beginning. Gods children are children of peace, which they entertaine in their mind and advance by their prayers and counſels.
There is another warre in the midſt of peace, little better then that where the quarrell is decided by the ſword, the warre of lawſuites, the diſcipline of cutting mens throats with a pen. There robbery is committed by the due forms of law, there men are flayed alive for others to cloath themſelves with their skin. There the profeſſion of giving to every man his owne, is turned by the profeſſours into an invention to make every mans goods their owne. The contentions infinite in number and length, and the devouring trade of law tricks, is the great plague of theſe Weſterne Provinces of Europe, and the greate ſhame of Chriſtendome while the Mahumetan Moores, our neighbours, diſpatch ſuites in an hour, without appeale or writ of errour. He that knowes how to value that precious peace with God and himſelfe, and deſires to keep it, will endure great extremities before he try that remedy worſe then moſt ſickneſſes; following St. Pauls leſſon, 1 Cor. 6. There is utterly a fault among you becauſe ye go to law one with another. Why do you not rather take wrong? Why do you not rather ſuffer your ſelves to be defrauded? And if he be yet to choſe his civill profeſſion, he ſhall do wiſely not to betake himſelfe to thoſe profeſſions that live by the contentiouſneſſe of others. But if he find himſelfe neceſſarily engaged in the practiſe of Law, he muſt behave himſelf in it as a child of peace, ſewing up againe, as much as in him lyeth, what others have rent; like good Princes which never draw their ſwords but to have peace. Look upon that tumultuous clamorous, & miſchievous buſtle, & then account it no ſmall happineſſe to live far from an aire ſo contrary to the tranquillity of mind, and the integrity and ſerenity of conſcience.
There are other diſſenſions without law, and many times without conſcience, which begin in envy, ſuſpicions, credulity to reports, & in words ill intended or ill taken, proceeding from words to blowes and many times ending in deſtruction. The worſt effect is within, the breach of the inward peace with God in a mans ſelfe, and the inbittering of the ſpirit, both of the offendor and the offended, unleſſe he be of a very milde, and godly, and Philoſophical temper.
To avoyd thoſe troubleſome encounters, Solomons precept muſt be obſerved. Prov. 22.24. Make no friendſhip with an angry man, and with a furious man thou ſhalt not go. But becauſe thoſe that muſt of neceſſity converſe with many cannot pick their company, and much leſſe change the manners of thoſe with whom they converſe, they muſt ſo govern and temper their owne, by piety and judgement, as never to give a juſt provocation to any.
Truly there is no fence againſt unreaſonableneſſe; and proud anger will be offenſive though unprovoked. Our part muſt be to breake ſuch mens choller with patience, as woolſacks and gabions full of earth are ſet before the battery of cannons. St Pauls precept to give place unto wrath, Rom. 12.19, is as wiſe as it is holy; for wrath groweth by oppoſition, but ſpends it ſelfe when one gives it place. If you be fiercely perſued by a ſerpent, do but ſtep aſide, the ſerpent will ruſh ſtraight on and miſſe you. And if you be ſet upon by impetuous choler, give it place by a gentle declination, it will paſſe-by harmleſs. Or if you receive reall injury from an angry man, expect no ſatisfaction from him while he is ſo, but appeale from him in hot blood to himſelfe in cold blood.
Contentious inſolent men being generally perſons of ſmall worth, it is a ſordid and unworthy imployment to contend with them: For as friendſhip makes friends equal, quarrells workes the like effect. If we contend with a drunkard or a loggerhead, we make him our fellow. Prov. 26.4. Anſwere not a foole according to his folly, leaſt thou alſo be like unto him. If you debate with a foole, you muſt imitate him, for the debate obligeth you to follow him in all his extravagancies.
That contention may not reach us, we muſt ſtand far from the contentions of others, and free ourſelves of that popular folly to run and croud to heare unknowne perſons that are at high words, and be preſently intereſſed in the quarrell, as when two dogs are fighting, all the dogs of the ſtreet will run to them, and take parts. A good and wiſe man will ſeek to make peace where poſſibility invites him, but where he ſeeth that he can do no good to others he will not venture to do harme to himſelfe. Mediations unleſſe they have a great meaſure of goodneſs and diſcretion, make the differences wider and beare the blow on both ſides.
To that end a wiſeman will be none of the forwardeſt to give his judgement of every thing, and none of the affirmative and great diſputants, that will ſet forth all their opinions, and evince them by ſtrength of argument: but he will be ſwift to heare, ſlow to ſpeake, ſlow to wrath, as St. James commandeth Jam. 1.19. In which words hee giveth a character of a wiſe man in converſation, that heares all, makes profit of all, determines of nothing, and is moved at nothing.
And whereas there is in all men good and bad a certaine reſpect of truth and righteouſnes, which at the hearing of untruth and unrighteouſnes will worke a ſudden averſion in the minde, if we will keepe an inoffenſive courſe in converſing with the world, we muſt learne to ſilenſe that averſion, and not let it appeare abroad without an eſpeciall order of our ſerious judgement, accuſtoming our eyes and eares and countenance to an unmoved patience, not thinking ourſelves obliged to oppoſe all the lyes and impertinencies of every one that we meete with, but onelyonly when the good name of God is notoriouſly blaſphemed. We ought to beare in mind that things true and juſt in our opinions in the opinion of all others. That we cannot juſtly claime the liberty of enjoying our opinions unleſſe we leave the ſame liberty to others. That our minds, as all the reſt of mankinde, are ſhortſighted and wrapt up in errour. And we are to give account of our owne, not of other mens follies. For one to beare himſelfe as the repairer of all wrongs and reformer of all that is amiſſe in the world, is an humour that hath much of the veine of old romanſes. Crafty and ambitious dealers have often got ſtrength by that weakenes of vulgar ſoules, yea have made even the true zeale to Gods glory tributary to their ambition.
Truly for ſo high a ſubject as Gods glory our reaſon, our will, our Paſſion, our words, and our actions muſt be ſet on worke. But we muſt take a carefull heed of miſtaking madnes for zeale, and ſuperſtition for religion. Neither muſt we think that for ſuch good ends as we may conceive any way is lawfull; there being nothing more cruel and pernicious then a baſtard and fanatical zeale. It is the plague of religion, the ruine of the State, and undoing of human ſociety. Better were it to live a ſlave in the chaines of Tunis and Tripoli, where the bodies are miſuſed without violence to the conſcience, then to be yoaked to the tireſome converſation of a fierce, ſcrupulous, & clamorous bigot, that will be at peace with no man unleſſe every one beleeve at his mode, though himſelfe knoweth not what he beleeveth; and alloweth reſt neither to himſelf or to others. Who ſo loveth his peace will keepe himſelfe from the torture of ſuch an odious companion, and will be yet more careful to keepe his minde free of that impetuous weakenes diſguized with the name of holy zeale and wiſedome. Iam. 3.15. That wiſedome deſcendeth not from above, but is earthly, ſenſual, devilliſh; For where envying and ſtrife is, there is confuſion and every evill worke. But the wiſedome that is from above, is firſt pure, then peaceable, gentle, and eaſy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocriſy. And the fruit of righteouſnes is ſowne in peace of them that love peace.
The chiefe way to keepe peace in Society, is meekenes. It takes up quarrels, and tyeth againe the knot of love when it happens to be untyed. It is the balſame that healeth the wounds made in friendſhip. It is the lenitive of injuries. It is the preſerver of peace with God, with men, and with ourſelves. Pſal. 37.11. The meeke ſhall inherite the earth, and ſhall delight themſelves in the abundance of peace.
There is a baſtard meekenes which is nothing elſe but a baſe & timorous nature, whereby a man yields all and to all, becauſe he is afraid of all. If that diſpoſition ſerveth ſometimes to prevent diſcord, it ſerveth more often to provoke it; for it invites contempt, and gives faire play to inſolence. It is farre from maintaining peace within, as true meekenes doeth; for it keepes the mind in perpetual feare, and fills it with diffidence and ſuperſtition. But true meekenes is a compound of humility, charity, and generoſity, whereby we keepe concord with our neighbours becauſe we love them; And to avoyd quarrel, call prudence and ſometimes diſdaine, to the helpe of patience; letting ill words goe by, as haile clattering over our roofe, and after a noiſe without effect, falling to the ground, and melting of itſelfe.
A meeke generous man will be ingenious to deviſe excuſes for them that offend him: alleadging for them, ſometimes the age, ſometimes the ſexe, ſometimes the ſicknes of the body, ſometimes that of the minde: He will ſay, This man is otherwiſe diſcontented; affliction makes men froward, he deſerves rather pitty then anger: That other man hath offended me unwittingly, or he was ill informed; If he layeth a falſe imputation upon me, he ſheweth that he knoweth me not, I muſt not be angry with a man for miſtaking me for another. If he deale unrighteouſly with me, I muſt conſider that all unrighteouſnes proceeds of errour; He hath more need to be taught then puniſht; I muſt not hate a man becauſe he is out of his way: In the offence done to me God is offended firſt, God then muſt firſt reſſent it; Vengeance is Gods not mine. If he that offendeth me is one of Gods children he is beloved of him, and I muſt not hate him whom God loveth. If he be wicked and will never repent of his wickednes, I need not procure him evill, God is his enemy, and will be ſure to make him eternally miſerable: But becauſe, for any thing I know, he may repent and be reconciled with God, which I muſt wiſh and hope for, I muſt not be enemy to him that may be Gods friend eternally; He and I were beſt to be friends on earth leaſt we never meete in heaven.
As in wreſtling, ſo in injuries, that man is the ſtrongeſt who is leſſe moved. The beſt victory over an enemy is to make him our friend. It is double victory; for ſo a man overcometh both his adverſary and himſelfe.
CHAP. II. Of brotherly Charity, and of Friendſhip.
TO live in concord with our neighbours we muſt love them, otherwiſe all our compliance and dexterity to keepe concord will be but diſſimulation, and though it get us peace abroad it will not give us peace within. My little children; ſaith St. John let us not love in word, neither in tongue, but indeed and in truth. 1. Ioh. 3.18. Then he addeth that hereby wee know that wee are of the truth, and aſſure our hearts before God. A text, ſhewing that charity to our neighbours fills the minde with ſaith, peace, and aſſurance: a doctrine, juſtified by the experience of meek and charitable ſoules. The ſame charity that unites us with Chriſt as our head, unites us alſo with our neighbours as his members, or at leaſt as his creatures that beare his image: In the one or the other of theſe relations we muſt love all men for Gods ſake, and render to them all poſſible duties of humanity.
To the practice of theſe duties we are more eſpecially called by the neceſſity of our neighbours, and by their vertue. Neceſſity affords us a perpetual occaſion of charity. Matth. 26.11 For ye have the poore alwayes with you, ſaith the Lord Jeſus. Others that are not poore in eſtate are poore in counſel, or health, or friends, or comfort: Let every body give of that he hath, to him that hath not, and he ſheweth charity to the rich if he doe him good expecting no reward.
Workes of charity doe good both to him that is relieved and to him that relieveth. But he that doeth good, gets more reliefe by it then he to whom it is done: for it is a thing more happy to give then to receive, Act. 20.35. ſaith St Paul after Chriſt; firſt becauſe of the good treaſure which is layd up thereby for the future, Pro. 11.25. The liberal ſoul ſhall be made fat, and he that watereth ſhall be watered alſo himſelfe. Giving charitably is caſting a ſeed bringing an everlaſting harveſt. It is ſending up ſweete vapours to heaven which are thickened there into a raine of bleſſings to ſhowre downe upon the head of the charitable perſon. To which we may joine the great and preſent content accrewing to the ſoule in the very act of giving, for good workes give a ready pay to the doers. This made Solomon to ſay The merciful man doeth good to his owne ſoul, Prov. 11.17 for the workes of mercy give a great joy to the doer. And he that gives his bread to the poore is more ſatiſfied with it then he that eates it. It is a divine felicity to doe good to many, for it is the greateſt imitation of God, who gives to all and is never weary of doing good. Herein onelyonly dignities and riches are good, that they enable a willing mind to doe much good.
As the neceſſity of our neighbours invites us to charity ſo doth their Vertue, which is the better invitation. The firſt ſort of Charity, which regards more the need then the worth of the perſon, is humanity and mercy; that which regardeth Vertue is friendſhip, or at leaſt a beginning of it.
Friendſhip, to deſerve fully that name, muſt be reciprocall, the parties loving one another dearely becauſe they deſerve it, and becauſe they ſee the graces of God each in the other. Friendſhip that regards profit and pleaſure deſerveth not that name ſince it is neither for the love of God, nor for the love of the perſon that ſuch a Friendſhip is contracted, but out of ſelfelove.
Friendſhip cemented by Vertue, and riveted by likeneſs in inclinations, manners, and opininions, is the ſweeteſt of all human things. For beſides counſell and mutuall help, and the delight of enterchanging thoughts and diſcharging cares in the boſome one of another, the union of affections, and the aſſurance to be beloved of the beloved perſon, is a content not to be expreſt; & there is ſomething heavenly in that harmony. It is a little imitation of the union between the perſons of the Trinity which make themſelves happy by their mutuall love. There is nothing neither in heaven nor in earth that giveth content but friendſhip. Nothing is pleaſant without it. And if I were asked what is the greateſt of all joyes, I would ſay that it is to love, and to be loved againe, and know it.
But it muſt be acknowledged that this perfection and felicity is more in Idea then in reality among men, and we muſt go higher then human Society, to find it. For whereas it is hard to find a vertuous man in the world, it is harder to find two. And it is harder yet to make theſe two meet in opinions, in inclinations, in intereſſes, in place of habitation, and in the like courſe of life; for the want of one of theſe particulars hinders the knitting of the bond of friendſhip, or makes it ſhortlived, or abates the comfort of it.
The deſcription which Pagan Philoſophy forgeeth of perfect friendſhip is a fair imagination of an impoſſible thing; They require two friends or three at the moſt, but ſuch as were never found, endowed with perfect vertue; That for that vertue theſe perſons love one another, without any other obligation or collaterall reſpect. That theſe perfect ſoules be ſo plunged and blended one within another that they can not owne themſelves ſingled and aſunder. That they be but one ſoul dwelling in ſeverall bodyes. That a friend give himſelfe ſo abſolutely to his friend that he live no more but for him, yea in him; and that his goods, as himſelfe, be his friends, whoſe intereſſes he wholly ſeekes, not his owne.
I wonder that among Chriſtian Philoſophers none hath hitherto obſerved (for any thing I know) what it was that bred that Idea of friendſhip ſo high and remote from the nature of things, in the fancy of Pagan Philoſophers, which yet placed vertue and felicity in living according to Nature; & why they have ſo univerſally adored that chimera which is found no where among men, like the Athenians that had ſet up an Altar to the unknowne God.
This is then the origine and ground of that high imagination of thoſe Pagans. They had found by ſearching the nature of man, that nothing can make him happy, but love; And that for a beatificall love a man hath need of an object all good, all wiſe, and all perfect; ſo perfectly united with him, yea ſo totally, that both paſſe the one into the other and make a mutuall free and abſolute gift of themſelves. But the poore men did not know that object of tranſcendent goodneſs, onelyonly worthy to be loved with all the heart and ſoul: and if ſome of them acknowledged God to be the Soveraine good, they beleeved not that he could have ſuch a communication with man that both might enterchange a mutuall gift of their owne ſelves; ſo, that man ſhould dwell in God, and God in man. Thinking not then that there might be a contract of friendſhip betweene God and man, and ſeeing that it is friendſhip that muſt make man happy, they forged that Idea of friendſhip betweene man & man, of which the condition of man is not capable, requiring for that friendſhip that which indeed is requiſite for felicity, but together is impoſſible to nature. For ſo farre they ſay true, that for a perfect love the ſoul of a friend muſt paſſe into his friends ſoul. But that being improperly and hyperbolically aſcribed to love betwen men, is true and reall in the friendſhip between God and man ſanctified, eſpecially when he is glorified; For God graceth man ſo much as to make him his friend, and to call him ſo, I have called you my friends ſaith Chriſt to his Diſciples. Joh. 15.15. And in that friendſhip there is ſuch a ſtrict union between God and the ſoul, that thereby the ſoul is refunded into her original being. The ſpirit of God gets into mans ſpirit, and the ſpirit of man poures it ſelfe into Gods ſpirit, as the river falls into the Sea and the Sea floweth into the river; Their wills become one, their intereſſes one, the glory of God and the ſalvation of man become the ſame thing; Man ſeeking above all things to glorifie God glorifyeth himſelfe, and is advanced by debaſing himſelfe out of his love to God, till finally ſeeing God, and being ſeene of him, 2. Cor. 3.18. he is changed into the ſame image, and made partaker of the divine nature. 2. Pet. 1.4.
When the Pagans from their contemplations upon friendſhip paſſe to examples, they ſhew how remote their imaginations are from the nature of things, and that their characters of friendſhip are fitter to be lookt on than copied out. For none of theſe paires of friends, which Antiquity extolls, is come neere thoſe compleat Ideas which they fancy. Moſt of them that would ſtrive to expreſſe them in their practice have made themſelves miſerable, and their friendſhip a bondage. Alſo among the vertuous examples of friendſhip, they ſet forth vicious preſidents; as that of Bloſius who being convented before the Senate about the ſedition of Tiberius Gracchus, whoſe intimate friend he was, and asked what he would have done for him, anſwered that he would have done any thing at his requeſt. And what (ſayd the Judges) if he would have requeſted thee to ſet the Temples on fire, wouldſt thou have done it? I know, replyed he, that Gracchus would never have had ſuch a will, but if he had deſired it of me, I would have done it. I am ſcandalized to ſee that anſwere commended by Chriſtian writers, Montagne and Carron. Let them comment upon it as much as they pleaſe, it is certaine that ſuch a deference to a friend's will, is the higheſt homage that the creature can make unto the Creatour, whoſe will is the onelyonly rule of righteouſneſſe. If any preferre his friends will before the obſervation of that Soveraine will, his amity is enmity againſt God, and becomes a plot and a conſpiracy to offend him.
Theſe old characters of perfect friendſhip perſwade ſome to imitate them, but commonly they are young men, that know neither how to chooſe what they ought to love, nor how to love what they have choſen; and they that chooſe a friend with moſt judgement, and preſerve him with moſt care ſoone find that human nature, though inricht with grace, affords neither the perfect objects, nor the firme bond, nor the ſolid content of Friendſhip.
Yet ſince we live in the world, we muſt make friends in it, and leaving heroique characters to romances, content ourſelves with ſuch as the earth beares, and neighbourhood preſents; chuſing them ſuch as have, at leaſt, piety, honeſty, and ingenuity; matching ourſelves with our equalls, or rather a little above us then under, preſerving their love by reſpect and good offices, and converſing with them with a cheerfull and innocent facility
But ſeeing that a great affection is a great ſervitude, filling the minde with care and feare, he that loveth his owne tranquillity will take heed how he engageth himſelfe in a friendſhip whoſe value doth not recompenſe the intereſſe he takes in it, and will not ſuffer his affection for any perſon to grow to the loſſe of his liberty and peace of mind.
It is a great folly for one to make himſelfe miſerable out of too much good nature, and to loſe the ſweetneſs of friendſhip by a perpetuall carefulneſſe and allarum. Good things become evill to us when we love them beyond meaſure. There is but one friendſhip where we may love without any meaſure, & where the greatneſſe of the affection brings reſt & ſerenity to the ſoul. It is the friendſhip with God, the only Good perfect and worthy of all our love, who being ſo great yet is able to contract friendſhip with us that are ſo little. If we have the grace to entertaine that friendſhip, which fills the ſoul with joy and goodneſſe, we ſhall eaſily be comforted about the rarity, and weakeneſs, yea and the loſſe of humane friendſhips.
CHAP. III. Of Gratefulneſſe.
I Have obſerved two duties of charity, which contribute much to the Reſt and content of the ſoul; The one is to relieve them that need it; the other, to love them whoſe vertue deſerves it. Theſe two duties require the company of another, which is, To be gratefull to them of whom we have received ſome benefit. For ſpeaking now to generous ſoules, I may obſerve that nothing lyeth more heavy upon their heart, then this reproach of their own mind, that they have not ſufficiently ſhewed their gratefulneſs unto their benefactor.
Our firſt benefactor is God, for to him we owe all, even what we owe to men. We owe him all that we have, and all that we are, our being and our wellbeing. To him then we muſt do homage for all; and our life being well ſuſtained by a continuall influence of his love, muſt alſo be a continuall courſe of thankfulneſſe. That duty we muſt tend with our words, with our thoughts, with our actions, and more with our affections.
But becauſe the creature cannot properly give any thing to the Creatour, becauſe all is his, who gives all, and receiveth of none but himſelfe; our gratefullneſs to God muſt be ſhewed to them whom he hath imployed to do us good.
We muſt beginne by paying debts. If a friend hath opened his purſe to us in our need, or hath helped us with his commodities of which he makes profit, expecting our conveniency to pay for them; It is not only a theft to be ſlack to ſatiſfie, it is ungratefulnes, which is farre worſe; for the plaine theefe abuſeth not the goodnes of his friend; but the ungrateful man renders evil for good, and defraudeth his friend becauſe he had pitty on him. One may doe greater and more profitable kindneſſes then lending of money; Yet there is none where ungratefulnes is more ſenſible, becauſe of the love that every one beares to his money, and the truſt that is repoſed upon it as the ſtaffe of life: Wherefore conſcience and generoſity muſt ſollicite the debtour to pay, and be ſtronger then bonds and compulſions of law to bring him to his duty.
St Paul enjoines us to owe nothing to no man but to love one another; A text full of Philoſophie: For there are ſome debts which we muſt not owe long, as debts for things borrowed and taken upon truſt. There are other debts, which we muſt alwayes pay, and alwayes owe; and though we muſt repay them preſently, yet we muſt owe them ſtill after we have payd them: Such are the duties of mutual love, and thankfull acknowledgement of kindneſſes. Pecuniary debts muſt be payd that we may be no more in debt; but as for the debt of love, that debtour is an ill paymaſter that lookes for an acquittance when he hath payd it. He that is truly gratefull deſires alwayes to pay, and alwayes to owe.
Civil life is a perpetual commerce of kindneſſes, a continual giving and returning. It is like a ſource that ſprings at the roote of a great oake, and is kept coole by that greene ſhade which it keepes freſh and verdant. Neither nature nor human ſociety can ſubſiſt without mutual giving and receiving. But fruitful ſoiles, and generous ſpirits, will yeeld much more then they receive: Now becauſe it is impoſſible for us to live in the world without receiving benefits which cannot be returned, it is ſome gratefulnes to ſhew to him that obligeth us that we delight to be obliged to him. Eſt animi ingenui, cui multum debeas, eiaem plurimum velle debere It is a proud and ſavage humour for one to refuſe a kindnes becauſe he knowes not how to repay it in the ſame kinde or value. It is turning friendſhip into a bargaine: They that will ſtick to that Maxime are ſoone forced to goe from it, though they be never ſo powerfull; for they that have moſt, are moſt needy of helpe, which cannot at all times be repayd. Saepe etiam dives à paupere plura petebat. Mans condition is ſo needy that every one depends of his neighbours kindneſſe. And though we muſt aſpire to that evangelical happines, rather to give then to receive, and ſtudy to overcome our benefactours by a noble emulation of beneficence, we muſt not pretend to that advantage proper to God alone, to oblige all men, and be obliged to none. The ſatiſfaction that we may give to ourſelves when we are obliged to one with whom we are like never to meete, or who is ſo high above us that our benefits cannot reach him, is to doe good to others that are unable to doe us the like. Then prayers to God are a commerce, whereby the loweſt perſons may benefit the greateſt. And we muſt endeavour to make God a ſurety for us, beſeeching him to be the remunerator of thoſe benefits which we cannot requite.
CHAP. IV. Of Satiſfaction of Injuries.
AS thankfulnes for benefits, ſo ſatiſfaction for injuries, is neceſſary to ſet a generous and religious mind at reſt; I meane of injuries that we have done, not of thoſe we have received. Yet we muſt learne how to behave our ſelves in both.
As for jniuries received, as a wiſe Chriſtian muſt willingly forget the good that he hath done, being content that God remembreth it; ſo he muſt forget the injuries that are done to him, and be content that God, to whom vengeance belongeth, keepeth them in remembrance. He muſt alſo remember in what need he ſtands of pardon before God, and that without forgiving he muſt not expect to be forgiven.
If he be ſo offended that he be obliged to reſſent it, he will implore Gods aſſiſtance to find honorable and peaceable wayes of ſatiſfaction, and keepe himſelfe cleane from blood and revenge. And if he think his honour to lye at the ſtake, he muſt think alſo that charity and diſcretion are more honourable then impatience, yea then valour. To keepe integrity and peace of conſcience let him ſadly conſider the horrible conſequences of a duell, in which a man either deliberately takes away the life of his neighbour, or himſelfe, loſeth his owne in the act of murther. Let him feare a perpetual biting remorſe, the cry of blood purſuing the murtherer, and the late repenting when one is fallen out with God and his owne conſcience for an unprofitable revenge.
Be the lawes of honour among ſwordmen never ſo ſevere, a wiſe and godly man ſhall never want wayes, which Gods mercy and wiſedome will ſuggeſt to his prudence, to come out of quarrels with credit & integrity. Eccle. 7.18. He that feareth God ſhall come forth of all. Truly he can come forth of a challenge by refuſing it, and keepe both honour and conſcience, after the example of many brave men, who are with good reaſon honored for their free oppoſing of that popular madnes.
That ordinary terme of taking or giving ſatiſfaction with the ſword, is as much againſt common ſenſe as it is againſt juſtice; for how can one give ſatisfaction for an injury by a greater? Is that ſatisfying a man whom you have offended to goe about to kill him? Or is it ſatisfying your ſelfe when you have bin offended to run the hazard of being killed by the offendour, and put him in poſſibility of getting double victory and double triumph over you?
That new point of honour for which men maſſacre one another, not ſo much out of hatred as to obey the tyranny of cuſtome, was not knowne in old time among the braveſt men. The Romans did not practiſe it in the flowre of their valour, which conquered the world. But as much as men are decreaſed in valour, ſo much are they increaſed in peeviſh impatience, which in effect is but weakenes. The ſtrongeſt trees are leſſe ſtirred by the wind, and the ſtrongeſt ſpirits are leſſe moved with injuries. As the tops of Atlas and Tenerifa are not beaten with haile, for they ſtand above it; high and magnanimous ſpirits ſtand above the inſolence of raſh men, and in that litigious ſtorme keepe their ſerenity. It is a good rule, to be moved with no fault but ſuch as we commit. If my neighbour offend me, the offenſe is his, not mine; To him, not to me, it belongs to reſſent it.
Wherefore the injuries, of which we muſt ſee the ſatisfaction made, are thoſe that we have done. If unwittingly or otherwiſe we happen to doe injury to any man with words or actions, it layeth a ſad weight upon our conſcience, which we muſt haſten to unloade, by ſatisfying the offended & ourſelves more, for the offenſe is more in the offendour then in the offended; and when we make ſatisfaction to him to whom the injury was intended, we doe more for ourſelves then for him.
Reparation muſt be made to God in the firſt place, for in all offenſes he is the firſt offended party, and this is done by repentance, of which wee have ſpoken before. That reparation which we make to our brethren, may be acceptable to God it muſt have theſe three qualities of godly repentance; It muſt be ſpeedy, free, and total. As the Sunne muſt not goe downe upon Our wrath, let it not goe downe upon that of our neighbour provoked by us, if we may prevent it. It is in us (with Gods aſſiſtance) to diſprove the Maxime which the practice of the Italians hath made true among them, Chi offende non perdona mai. The offender (ſay they) never forgiveth. It is a great ſhame indeed to have given offence, but the offenſe is greater to refuſe to mend it. The Lord Jeſus our great Maſter having taken care to heale the wound that his Diſciple had made, ſhall wee refuſe to heale the wounds which we have made ourſelves? God ſaith, Vengeance belongs unto me, I will recompenſe; there he ſpeakes of the injuries done to us: But as for the injuries done by us, vengeance belongs unto ourſelves, ſo farre as to make recompenſe to them whom we have wronged. Which recompenſe unleſſe we make, God will make it. Our wiſeſt courſe then is to make that recompenſe ſincerely; ſo may we eaſe God of that care.
CHAP. V. Of ſimplicity, and dexterity in Society
PEace with men conſiſteth in doing and receiving no injury. The firſt (with Gods aſiſting grace) depends of us. Towards the ſecond, though depending of others, we may do much. For the cauſe why ſome are wronged and abuſed, commonly lyeth not ſo much in the inſolence of others, as in their owne imprudence.
But the end of this Book (the ſame as that of our lives) being not onelyonly peace by doing and receiving no injury, but content by doing and receiving good, we muſt ſtudy both how to lead a ſafe and inoffenſive courſe of life, and how to be uſefull to ourſelves and others.
That skill we learne of the great Maſter of wiſedome, who hath comprehended it in theſe two ſhort precepts. Matth. 10.16. Be ye prudent as ſerpents, and harmleſſe [or ſimple] as doves. Theſe two he makes into one, becauſe they make together an excellent compound, and becauſe they muſt never be disjoyned. Simplicity without prudence would ſerve onelyonly to make us ſheep for the wolves to eat. Prudence without ſimplicity, though it could get us ſome peace and utility with men would forefeit our peace with God and our conſcience, and ſo prove meere folly in the end.
How eſſentiall ſimplicity is to prudence it is ſeene in all the parts of converſation, which are reducible to theſe two heads, Words and Actions.
As for words, it is certaine that ſimplicity is the moſt requiſite quality, what uſe ſoever they be put to, publique or private, religious or civil. And even the diſcourſes made only for elegancy and delectation cannot attaine their end without ſimplicity; for that gracious expreſſion, and powerfullneſs of words, which gets the fame of eloquence, is nothing elſe but ſimplicity managed with dexterity. They that go farre from it and make their ſtyle darke to make it ſhew deep, or bombaſt it with extravagant conceits, and new ill coyned termes, loſe elegancy by hunting too eagerly after it; there being no ſuch deadly enemy to grace in ſpeech as affectation. Beſides it is found that diſcourſes full of affected difficulty are like olive ſtones, which are very hard becauſe there is nothing in them; and ſtyles puffed up with words are empty of matter, as ſome cheating women have bin ſeene, that appeared great with child when they were big with a pillow. The knowledge of things, the ſolidity of reaſon, and the ſincerity of the mind, are the three magazines affording good and gracious diſcourſes. Where thoſe three meet, the more the ſtyle is ſimple the more elegant it is. And in matter of ſpeech, the beſt ſervice that dexterity can do to right reaſon, is to deliver in cleare termes thoſe thoughts which the mind hath well diſgeſted. So ſhall one ſatisfie others and himſelfe.
Affectation is alike ungracious in Words and Actions. Affected perſons have that hard fortune that while they ſtudy to diſguiſe themſelves, they diſcover themſelves moſt; there being nothing that betrayes a may ſo much as affectation doth. His forced countenance, his ſtudied geſture, the odd quaintnes of habit, give an evident character of a mind diſordered by pride, and a nature drowned in fooliſh artifice. Such men are diſpleaſing to God, who loveth truth and ſimplicity in the inward parts, Pſal. 51. and therefore cannot but be diſpleaſing to themſelves, deſtitute of peace of conſcience and contentment of mind. Melancholy is an inſeperable companion of conſtraint, for who can take delight in that which he does againſt nature? Therefore ſtage buffoones when their jigge is done are very ſad and froward, becauſe they have extraordinarily conſtrained themſelves.
There is a deeper and craftier ſimulation called hypocriſy, which knoweth how to perſonate plaine honeſty, and put upon fraud the face of ſimplicity; as indeed without that it is impoſſible to cozen. Simplicity and Integrity are of ſuch price among men, good and evill, that without the ſubſtance, or the ſhew of them, it is not poſsible to entertaine any commerce in the world: And men that have but the ſhew of theſe, deſire to deale with them that have the ſubſtance, becauſe they are true and ſure dealers. As wicked as the world is, uprightneſſe is the ſafeſt courſe to advance a man: for every one will ſay, He is an honeſt man, It is ſafe dealing with him. The principall is, that thereby we keep good intelligence with God and with our conſcience.
The chiefe prudence then, is to be honeſt: They that ſeeke to appeare ſuch, and are not, are imprudent; for to enjoy the benefit of honeſty before men, the ſure way is to have it indeed. Counterfeit honeſty is falſe coyne, not ſafe to trade withall; and in the end, it turneth to the undoing of the falſe coiner. But honeſty and prudence have need to be more in reality within, then in ſhew without. For to make a great ſhew of honeſty gives a great ſuſpition of hypocriſy; and to make a great ſhew of prudence is aſigne of ſhalloweſs. It is better to ſhew honeſty then prudence, becauſe honeſty is of greater price, and becauſe every one ought to have it & profeſs it: Whereas it is a great point of prudence to conceale it, for that man is not very crafty that ſheweth his craft. He that ſets out much policy in diſcourſe, commonly keepes but little in reſerve.
Next to integrity, which is the firſt counſell of wiſedome in converſation, the beſt counſell is to know ourſelves, the buſineſs that we take in hand, and the perſons that we have to do with; meaſuring our ſtrength and what we are fit for, that we never meddle with any thing above our capacity, or that we may deſiſt before we be too far engaged. It is a great point of wiſedome for one to be able to adequate his imployment to his capacity and inclination. But becauſe the choice of our imployment for all our life is commonly made in our nonage by our parents who are many times miſtaken in our genius and ability, or imploy us where they can, not where they would; we muſt by a vertuous reſolution, bow our genius to our imployment, and ſupply the wants of nature with dexteterity.
For this there is need of that vertue which the Italians and French cry up ſo much, called accortezza or accortize. A word, which I recommend to my readers, to be made by their countenance free denizon of England, if they like it; Let me not be the onelyonly writer of theſe times that dares not coine new Engliſh. Accortize is a pliableneſs and dexterity to fit oneſelfe to all buſineſſes and perſons and times. And firſt for buſineſſes, a wiſe and accort man muſt make unto himſelfe an univerſall and complying ſpirit, verſatile ingenium, to whom nothing ſeems ſtrange or new, & not ſo much affected to ſome certaine things, as to be unfit for all other things. Thales the Mileſian Philoſopher, being mocked by ſome Merchants of Miletus, upbraiding him that he declaimed againſt riches, becauſe he felt himſelfe uncapable to get them, began a traffick whereby in one Summer he engroced the whole trading of the Towne to himſelfe; Then having ſhewed what he could do, he left trading, and returned to his Philoſophy. It is a ſhame for a man of reaſonable parts to be fit but for one thing; but certainly if one can ſort his imployment to his proper genius, he ſhall do much for the liberty of his actions, the ſucceſſe of his enterpriſes, and the contentment of his mind.
As we muſt comply with buzineſſes, ſo we muſt with perſons, whoſe ſeveral natures we ſhould therefore ſtudy. To this, natural Philoſophie will helpe us much, for the inclinations and manners of men will commonly follow the temper of their body. But experience and obſervation are the beſt ſchooles for that ſkill. We muſt carefully obſerve the humours of thoſe perſons that are within the ſphere of our activity that we may take every man in his humour, marking what things they are moſt bent upon, and wherein they are moſt impatient to be croſt. Of all the miraculous gifts of the holy Ghoſt which are ceaſed, I finde none ſo much wanting as the gift of diſcerning the ſpirits, for want of which we miſſe ſo often the compaſſing of our ends with our neighbours, either for their good or our owne. Jer. 17.9. The heart of man is deceitfull, who can know it? And ſome natures are harder to know then others, and need a longer obſervation. Some having planted orchards with great care and coſt, at thirty yeares end beginne to perceive that the ſoyle was not fit for trees. And many fathers have miſſed that comfort which they might have had from their children, becauſe they have knowne their nature too late, and ſet them upon a courſe of life unſuitable to their minds and abilities. If fathers are thus ſhort in the knowledge of their owne children, and ourſelves with much adoe attaine the knowledge of our owne nature; how ſhall we be able to know the nature of ſo many perſons with whom we muſt converſe, having to doe every day with new men, which ſhew nothing but a plauſible and artificial outſide?
In that great art of Diſcerning, the proper handles to lay hold of the ſeveral ſpirits, which is the great work of acccotize, honeſt and worthy men muſt have an emulation not to be overcome by impoſtors and juglers that make it their whole trade. Truly the children of light have need in this point to turne diſciples of the children of darknes. They know how to perſwade the generous with honour, the timorous with feare, the covetous with profit, the voluptuous with pleaſure, the proud with praiſe, the devout with conſcience. Of that manner of commerce, of which ſomething is to be taken, ſomething left, the ſincere and prudent muſt learne enough to avoyd circumvention, and to know the ſeveral avenues of the ſpirits with whom he is to converſe.
Accortize having taught a man to fit himſelfe for the ſeveral buzineſſes and perſons, her third worke is to make him diſcerne the nature of the times, and comply with them as farre as he may with a ſafe conſcience. Every age of the world hath its proper genius, which a wiſeman muſt obſerve; daily ſtudying the raigning humours, the ebbes and flowes of cuſtomes, and the ſignes of approaching revolutions, either to make benefit of the tyde, or to decline it with as little harme as may be, if it ſuite not with his conſcience and inclination.
He that will maintaine or advance himſelfe in a time full of revolutions and quick turnes, hath need to be of the nature of ivy, which takes hold of all that ſtands neere, gets roote every where, even upon ſtones, and followeth all the turnes of the tree or wall that it ſticks unto. Many might have advanced themſelves in the world, had their conſcience bin as nimble as their induſtry. But it is not advancement but the peace and contentment of minde that a wiſe and godly man muſt looke for. Conſcience and ſimplicity are not able to follow all the giddy turnes of the world, eſpecially when one hath a publique imployment, where it is as impoſſible to be hid as it would be treacherous to be indifferent. But when conſcience lyeth not at the ſtake, a wiſeman finally muſt yeeld if he cannot overcome. He muſt not blow againſt the wind, nor juſtle againſt a windmill turning with impetuoſity. The difficulties of life being great and many, and every one being more cleare ſighted in his neighbours caſe then his owne, we muſt in our difficulties aſke counſell of thoſe whom we know to be wiſe and honeſt, and to have no intereſſe but our owne in the buzineſſes upon which we conſult them. It is better to conſult thoſe that are leſſe wiſe then ourſelves, then to take counſell of none but ourſelves in things important. For two eyes ſee more then one; Though another have not better eyes, he may looke upon the buzines by another by as; and if he be not capable to give us counſell, he is able to forme objections, which will be ſo many overtures of counſel. We muſt heare all 1. Theſ. 5.21. Prove all things, hold faſt that which is good: be free and benevolent to all, truſt but few; but ſhew no miſtruſt to any without neceſſity.
Two contrary faults are the ordinary ruine of buſineſſes, The one is too much fervency and haſte to bow the occaſion to our deſire, whereas we ſhould gently bow our deſire to the occaſion, and ſtay till it be ripe. The other is negligence and ſecurity, preſuming of ones owne merit and fortune, deſpiſing oppoſitions and letting occaſions ſlip. But many times raſh men from one of theſe contraries paſſe to the other, for fiery and haſty men will ſoone relent, and utterly ruine by their negligence what they had ſpoiled before by their haſtines.
It would be endleſſe and beyond my ſubject to ſpecifie all the precepts of prudence. Others have eaſed me of that labour. I doe but recommend the ſtudy and practiſe of them to ſuch as will enjoy peace and contentment of minde. We are not Maſtes of events, but we ought to be Maſters of counſels. If a good counſel be followed with a ſiniſter event, we beare it more eaſily when we can beare witneſs to ourſelves that it is not for want of a wiſe, diligent, and honeſt care. But he that hath ruined his buſineſs through his imprudence hath a double affliction, for his misfortune, and for his folly. I may excuſe my-ſelfe from ſpeaking more of prudence in this Chapter, for all I have ſaid hitherto and have to ſay hereafter, is nothing elſe.
CHAP. VI. To have little Company and few Buſineſſes.
I Spake lately of Prudence in Buſineſs; But the greateſt prudence in buſineſs, is to have but few; it being impoſſible to have many without diſturbing the peace of the foul. And what imprudence is it, to loſe the end for the acceſſories? eſpecially when one is deceived in thoſe acceſſories, and miſtakes for the helps of his content, the inſtruments of his misfortune. The more wee converſe with men, the leſſe wee converſe with God. Yea the content which we might expect by our converſation with men is loſt by too much converſation. For whereas among men there are more wicked then good, and among good men there are more unwiſe then wiſe, it followeth that in great companies (taking them one with another) there is more evill then good, and more folly then wiſedome, and the greater the worſe. It is in few friends well choſen, that the ſweetneſs and utility of converſation conſiſteth. The leſſeyou appeare in the crowd the leſs ſhall you be crowded, the leſſe ſecret envy and open quarrell ſhall you incurre, the leſs evill ſhall you learne and doe. It is no wonder that young men are inveigled with temptations, embroyled in quarrells, and made the prey of cheaters; The poore youths are newly come into the world, & to ſee it they ſeeke great meetings, they gaze upon all they ſee, ſin for company, or to get experience. But when a man hath ſeen enough of the world to know it, and hath learned wiſedome out of the folly of others, and the miſcariages of his owne imprudence, he will content himſelfe to ſee the ctowd afar off, and will not thruſt into it, and medle too farre with this wicked, fooliſh, and dangerous generation.
We muſt not ſpeak thus out of a preſumptuous ſingularity, ſo deſpiſing the world that we eſteem none but ourſelves: We muſt acknowledge that we have the world in our heart, and that we alſo are wicked, fooliſh and of dangerous converſation. If the world corrupt us, we alſo help to corrupt the world. Wherefore as bodies that have the itch; ſo ſpirits infected with vice muſt lye aſunder, elſe they ſhall increaſe one anothers infection, and the infection muſt needs be greater where there is a greater number of infected perſons: Where the crowd of men is, there alſo is the crowd of ill cuſtomes and popular errours. And if it be hard to reſiſt the temptations of vicious perſons when they ſet upon us ſingle, how can we ſtand againſt them when they fall upon us together in a full body? How can we think on any thing but evill when we ſee and heare nothing elſe? How can we lift up our hearts to God and converſe with him, in a confuſed noiſe and tumultuous hurrey, which is the Kingdome of the Devill?
Theſe conſiderations have moved ſome holy Fathers to retire into deſerts, to have no other company but God, and tend the worke of their ſalvation without diſturbance. But becauſe God will be glorified by us in the duties of humane Society, and hath not ſent us into the world only to tend our ſalvation, that Retreat from the world is excuſable in thoſe only, that can do as much, or more good to the world living farre from it as living in Society. Such were thoſe who in their hermitages enricht the treaſure of the Church with their divine workes, confuting hereſies and increaſing the ſtock of holy learning. But to leave the world to do good to none but ourſelves, is fruſtrating the end which God made us, for ſince he hath made us for Society, as it appeareth by the ten commandements, moſt of which regard our duty to our neighbours. A man of good parts that leaveth all Society to meditate, and gives no fruit of his meditation to the world, is like the Jordan whoſe faire and quick water is loſt in the lake of Sodom, called the dead Sea; It is to dye living, and loſe the quickneſs of the mind in a gulfe of unprofitable idleneſs. It is leaving the world in the worſt ſenſe, for it is forſaking mankind and denying to Society that Service which we owe. A conſideration able alone to trouble that tranquillity which Hermites and cloyſtred men ſeek in ſolitarineſs. Neither can they make amends to the world by their prayers; for as they pray for us that live in in the world, we pray for them that live out of the world, and ſo we are even with them.
The Lord Jeſus hath taught us how to uſe ſolitarines; for he retired by night into the mountaine to pray, and in the day time he taught the people, and when he was weary of the multitude he withdrew himſelfe to the company of his diſciples, who were a choice of perſons whom he honoured with the title of his friends, ſo ſharing his time betweene his particular communication with God, his ſervice of the publique and his communication with his ſingular friends.
One may leave the world, and yet keepe it in his heart; and one may converſe with the world, and yet leave it. A godly wiſeman may find retirednes in the greateſt citties. Hee may paſſe through the crowd and not ſtay in it or mingle with it, as the river of Rhoſne goeth through the Lemane lake. He will doe ſervice to all if he can, but converſe with few. He may enjoy himſelfe in a multitude of unknowne perſons, as if they were the perſonages of an Arrashanging; for a man is alone where he knoweth no body, and acquaints himſelfe with none.
For his acquaintance he will pick thoſe whoſe life is vertuous, the ſpirit meeke, and the converſation plaine and eaſy. He will endeavour to deſerve their good will with his owne; being ready and aſſiduous with them when he may ſerve them, but out of that making his viſits ſhort, to oblige them to the like; alwayes leaving his friends company before they be weary of his. In his choyce he will take men ſuch as they be, not depriving himſelfe of the benefit of converſation out of a preconceit of perfect Idea's of worthy ſubjects of friendſhip; but ſince all men are evill and weake, he will be content with thoſe that have leſſe evill in them, and that have wiſedome enough to know their owne weakenes. Knowing himſelfe full of imperfections he will beare with the imperfections of his friends, expecting of them the like forbearance.
He muſt labour to have a ſoule with many ſtories, which may ſtoope and riſe according to the ſeveral conditions and capacities of men, not fearing to ſpeake to Kings, not diſdaining to converſe with peaſants, every where equal, modeſt, generous, and reaſonable, reſpecting good ſenſe whereſoever he finds it, and he will find it as often under the ruſſet jerkin, as under ſcarlet and gold lace.
Becauſe he muſt looke for errour & impertinency in al ſorts of acquaintance, let him put every one upon the diſcourſe of thoſe things that he underſtands beſt; ſo ſhall he doe a kindnes to the company, for every one loveth to ſpeak of that wherein he is expert, & he ſhall benefit himſelfe, fetching from every one the beſt that is in him.
Let him alſo fit his minde for all kinds of buzineſſes, thinking none too great when they are not above his capacity; for thoſe affaires that have more dignity have not alwayes more difficulty: And on the other ſide thinking no buzines too low when it is neceſſary, or when it gives him occaſion to doe good.
But in general let him charge himſelfe with as few buzineſſes as he can, I meane thoſe buzineſſes that engage a mans minde in the tumult of the world, without which he may find buzines enough to keepe him ſelfe well imployed. Want of preferment is better than want of peace. Let him avoyd thoſe imployments that give, vexation and yet draw envy, where a man muſt continually ſtand upon his guard, imbark himſelfe in factions, and live in perpetuall emulation and contention. The man to whom God keepes the bleſſing of a quiet life ſhall bee kept by him from that glittering rack and golden fetters, but the man whom he will aflict ſhall be given over to be toſſed betweene the competition of others and his owne ambition. David ſhewes us how great is Gods goodneſſe which he hath layd up for them that fear him, namely that he wil hide them in the ſecret of his preſence from the pride of man, he will keepe them ſecretly in a pavilion from the ſtrife of tongues. Pſal. 31.19.20. But what! there are ſome ſpirits that love noiſe, and live by Contradiction, and when old factions are worne out, hatch new ones, ſowing quarrels that they may be ſticklers, and in ſuch ſort arbitrating differences as to make them immortall that ſo they may never want buſineſs. To ſuch men no worſe imprecation can be made then that they may alwayes have the buſineſs which they love; for as they ſerve the father of diſcord they are like to ſhare in his reward.
But thoſe are worthy of his compaſſion, whoſe ſerene religious ſoules, capable and deſirous of high contemplation, are aſpiring towards the God of peace, but are diſtracted with contentious buſineſſes, and preſt down with worldly imployment, though perhaps too high for their condition, yet too low for mind; which meaſuring the height of things by their diſtance from heaven, finds the great Offices of the State very low, becauſe they are deeper in the earth, and further from heaven; then other Offices of an obſcurer note. Who would not pitty a great perſon that hath ſcarce time to eate and ſleepe, that muſt have a light brought to his bed to make diſpatches before day, and when he goeth to the Court hath much adoe to get out of his yard through the crowd of ſuitors? and in that clogge of buſineſſes, what time hath he to examine the ſtate of his conſcience and labour to advance his union with God? Where is any gaine able to countervaile that loſs?
But there are more perſons undone for want of buſineſſes, when they have not the capacity to find themſelves worke of ſome utility, eſpecially when the love and feare of God have not taken root in their hearts. For there being in the ſoul three Offices or audits, the firſt for contemplation, the ſecond for paſſion, and the third for action; when a mans mind is unfit for contemplation, & wants action, he giveth himſelf wholly unto paſſion: Then a man tickleth himſelfe with evill deſires and vaine hopes, gnawes his heart with envy and ſpite, and torments himſelfe with impatience; theſe vices being bred and fed by idleneſſe. Such men having nothing to do, deviſe evill or uſeleſſe buſineſſes, going up and downe all day long like ſwallowes that flye round not knowing for what, walking from one end of the Town to the other to viſit one that will not be at home when they aske for him, or is put to his ſhift to be rid of their company. Of that kind are moſt of thoſe that thruſt one another in the ſtreet, as buzy as if they had three Chancery ſuites to ſolicit; then returne home late, weary, and ſweating, having found the invention to tire themſelves and do nothing. In effect, an idle life is more painfull and weariſome then an active and negotious life. It makes one ſad, troubleſome, and vicious. He that doth nothing cannot but do evill, as grounds left untilled will bring thiſtles
But he that hath an ordinary employment, of ſome utility to the publique, hath no leaſure to attend vaine and evill actions, nor to be ſad; By doing good he contenteth his conſcience and maintaines the ſerenity of his mind, ſo that he embrace no more then he can hold: They that will doe too much good, do it ill, and do harme to themſelves. It is a prepoſterous diligence when it brings vexation to a mansſelfe.
Rich old men ſhould do wiſely to give over buſy imployments of the world vvhichwhich require a whole man, to give themſelves wholly to the office of man, as he is a man and a Chriſtian. If they be ſpeculative, judicious, and experienced men, they may do more good to the world in their retirement then in the crowd of buſineſſes.
They that lead an active life ought not to give but lend onelyonly their mind to the buſineſſes of the world. A wiſe man will follow his worldly occaſions with diligence and induſtry, but he will not tranſubſtantiate himſelfe into them. In our buſieſt imployments let us retire often within, to enjoy God and ourſelves, labouring chiefly to preſerve his favour and our peace. Without theſe, all labour is ſuperfluous or evill, and gaine becomes damage,
CHAP. VII. Of Moderation in Converſation.
IT is a moſt neceſſary proviſion for any man that will lead a peaceable life, in this age and theſe regions, torne with diverſity of parties; Mens minds being ſo generally exulcerated, that in caſuall meetings either they caſt a ſuſpicious eye upon their Contreymen becauſe they know them not, or abhorre them becauſe they know them. Here then there is need of a meek, compliant induſtrious and univerſall mind, retired within himſelfe, and healed of that epidemicall itch of light-brained men, to declare all their opinions, and inclinations, and quarrell with all that are otherwiſe diſpoſed.
It is an old and uſefull obſervation, that God hath given us two eares and one mouth, to teach us that we ought to heare more then ſpeake. To which it may be added, that we have no eare-lids to keep our eares from hearing, and often muſt heare againſt our will; but our mouth ſhuts naturally, and we may keep our tongue from ſpeaking, unleſſe by our intemperance we loſe that priviledge of nature.
God indeed hath not given us a tongue to hold our peace: But, that we may uſe it ſo that our neighbours may receive good by it, and we no harme, there is need of a great meaſure of charity and diſcretion.
To that end a wiſe man will not be the chiefe ſpeaker in an unknowne or dangerous company, but be content to ſecond thoſe that are more able or more willing to ſpeake, unleſſe the diſcourſe be like to turne to a contentions matter, for then it will be prudently done to put the company upon ſome innocent diſcourſe acceptable to all. But companies are apt to ſpeake of that which hath the vogue; of points of State in factious times, and of points of religion almoſt at all times.
As for points of State any man may be bold to interrupt the diſcourſe, ſaying, Let us leave State buſineſſes to Statesmen.
The diſcourſe of religion, the great occaſion of falling out, muſt be turned, if we can, to the uſe of comfort and amendment of life, rather then arguing about points of beleefe. Indeed we we are commanded to be alwayes ready to give an anſwere to every man that aſketh us a reaſon of the hope that is in us, 1 Pet. 3.15. Which when we are called upon, we muſt doe it as the text modifieth it, with meekenes and feare; not with bitternes & contention. And the Apoſtle requires of us to be ready to anſwere, not eager to queſtion. Reaſon ſerveth to convince, but charity is the chiefe and welnigh the onelyonly way to perſwade. Vehemence will make an adverſary ſtiffer, for even the force of an inſoluble argument, though calmely propounded, makes no other impreſſion upon prejudicate ſpirits but to make them ſtartle; and finding no helpe in reaſon, to leane the more fiercely upon paſſion. Though you ſtop your adverſaries mouth, you ſhall not thereby convince his reaſon; and though you convince his reaſon, you ſhall not turne his beleefe: For that, you muſt winne his affection, and affection is not wonne with Syllogiſms; for I ſpeake of men not ſuch as they ſhould be, altogether ruled by right reaſon; but ſuch as they are for the moſt part, blinde and heady, having their reaſon enſlaved to cuſtome and paſſion. There is great difference betweene convincing and converting: The firſt may be done by the goodnes of the cauſe, or the ſubtility of the diſputant; But converting is the worke of God onelyonly. It is enough to perſwade us that ſpirit and ſoule are too different things, when we ſee ſpirits capable of the higheſt Philoſophical reaſons to be unable to underſtand plaine reaſoning about matters that concerne their ſalvation. In vaine ſhall you convince the ſpirit with reaſon, unleſſe God open the eares of the ſoule.
In ſuch meetings, in ſtead of ſeeking wherein we differ, and falling out about it, we ſhould ſeeke wherein we agree, and praiſe God for it. If newes were brought to us of the diſcovery of a great Chriſtian Empire in Terra Auſtralis, where they beleeve the holy Scriptures, and the Creed, and receive the foure firſt General Councels; No doubt but it would rejoyce us much, and we would love them though they differed from us in the doctrines built upon thoſe common grounds. And why doe we not beare with our neighbours and countrey-men who agree with us in ſo many fundamentall points, who worſhip the ſame God, Father, Sonne, and Holy Ghoſt; who embrace the promiſes of the Goſpel in Jeſus Chriſt, and endeavour by the love of God and the exerciſe of good workes to glorifie God and attaine to his kingdome? Could we abhorre one another more if one partie worſhipped Chriſt and the other Mahomet? Even where the quarrel was onelyonly about points of Diſcipline, the diſſenſion was heated even to confiſcations, battells, and ſacking of townes; So furious is ſuperſtition, and funeſt in its effects, what party ſoever it take; for it is found in good and evill parties, being natural to all weake and paſſionate ſoules: If it maintaine falſhood it diſhonoureth the truth by putting a wrong byaſſe upon it. It is a compound of ignorance, pride, raſhnes, and cruelty; All which moulded with a baſtard zeale, and infuſed in black choller, make up the moſt malignant venome of the world.
For one that is of the ſtronger party it is inſolence to provoke him that is of the weaker in the moſt ſenſible point of all, which is conſcience. And for him who is of the weaker party to provoke him that is of the ſtronger, it is both inſolence and folly.
In a milde and well compoſed ſpirit, the dangerous errours of others moove pitty not hatred; And if pitty ſets him on to reduce them to the ſaving truth, prudence will take him off betimes from that deſigne when he ſeeth it impoſſible; And it is impoſſible when charity will not doe it, which muſt not be violated for any pretence whatſoever. Pſal. 85.10. Mercy and truth ſhall meet together, righteouſnes and peace have kiſſed each other. Truth cannot be eſtabliſht without mercy, nor righteouſnes without peace. Making breach in charity to preſerve faith is demoliſhing the roofe of the Church to mend the walls. Having found by the trial of a hundred yeares that battells and ſyllogiſms will bring no general converſion, let us fight no more but by prayers, and let all parties ſtrive for the palme of charity and moderation. The two rivers of Danubius and Sauns falling into one channel goe thirty leagves together unmingled. If the difference of our opinions will not ſuffer us to mingle, yet we may joine. Let us goe quietly together in our common channel, the State where we live, tending to the ſame end, the publique peace and the glory of God. This conceit I owe to that bleſſed ſonne of peace, that rare teacher and high patterne of moderation and tranquillity of minde the right Reverend Biſhop Hall, who hath not written one onelyonly booke of Chriſtian moderation; but all his learned and gracious workes, and the whole courſe of his wiſe and religious life are a perpetual comment upon that golden vertue.
When we conferre of any matter with perſons of a different tenet, our end muſt ever be to find the truth not to get the victory. And that end muſt be ſought with a meeke and moderate way. That milde courſe will yeeld us a double benefit, for it will preſerve the liberty of our judgement, which is taken away by the heate of diſpute and precipitation. A haſty diſputant will ſoone be brought to non plus. Beſides when good ſenſe is aſſiſted with moderatiō, it ſinks better into the adverſaries reaſon, as a ſoft ſhowre ſoakes the ground better then a ſtormy raine. A moderate rational man either ſhall win the aſſent of his adverſary or his good opinion.
Railing and inſultation are offenſive, more to him that uſeth it then to them that are miſuſed by it, for when paſſion riſeth high in words, it giveth a prejudice to the hearers, that reaſon is out of combat. Anger is an ill helpe to reaſon for it diſableth reaſon from helping itſelfe. Dogs that bark much ſeldome bite, for it is feare that makes them barke.
Great and good workes are done with little noiſe. So was the worke of ſalvation done, the beſt of all workes: Of the Author and finiſher whereof Iſaiah ſaith, He ſhall not ſtrive, nor lift up, not cauſe his voyce to be heard in the ſtreets: Iſa. 42.2. Wherefore when Devills poſſeſſing mens bodies cryed out in his preſence, He commanded them to hold their peace, for the Devill loves noiſe and tumult, but God loves peace, meekneſs, and ſerenity.
It is a precept fit for the Goſpell of peace, Let your moderation be known of all men. Phil. 4.5. The word of the Text foreign, properly ſignifies equity. Of that equity the grand rule is to do to others as wee would have others doe to us. Which in the point of converſation, our preſent matter, ought to make us deale with others with that patience reſpect and moderation, which we expect of them; not ſetting forth our opinions imperiouſly, nor rejecting the opinions of others arrogantly, remembring that all men by their naturall condition (never throughly mended by grace in this life) are inwrapt in a deep miſt, and that all our reaſoning is groping in the darke; Let us paſſe gently over the errours of our neighbours to oblige them to the like kindneſs.
If we knew how few things we know, and how lamely, we would make uſe of reaſon and diſcourſe rather to ſeeke inſtruction then to pronounce aphoriſms. If we find ourſelves capable to cleare a matter, let us do it without awing the company with peremptorineſs, or wearying it with multitude of words. No diſcourſe is profitable when it is tedious. In every matter there is commonly but one eſſentiall reaſon, or two at the moſt. More reaſons ſerve for illuſtration, or to fill up, and many times to invalid the true reaſon. Three good reaſons for the ſame thing, are worſe then one.
The greateſt uſe, and indeed the greateſt trial of moderation in conference, is to avoyd confounding the intereſſe of the thing with the intereſſe of the perſon, of ones ſelfe eſpecially. For where ſhall you finde thoſe ſerene unmoved minds, who hearing their opinion taxed of ignorance & folly wil not preſently ſtart & take more paine to prove, that they are no fooles then to weigh the reaſons, and judge impartially where the truth lyeth? Moſt men being thus diſpoſed, he that will oppoſe their opinions muſt proceed with great moderation, leſt that, being touched in credit and perſonal reſſenting, they make the truth ſuffer for their private intereſſe. We muſt charitably conſider that every one loveth the productions of his owne braines, as his children, and is ſenſible of the abuſe offered unto them. And we muſt bring our charity to this beleefe that every one is in good earneſt of the opinion which he profeſſeth, and thinks himſelfe to be in the right. Il proprio parer non ha mai torto. You beleeve he is in an errour, he beleeves the ſame of you, And he will never think himſelfe to be in the wrong, till it be repreſented to him with ſolid reaſon, ſweetened with ſingular meekenes and reſpect.
Moderate and ingenuous ſpirits (O how rare they be?) finding themſelves preſt with reaſon and truth, will freely yeeld the bucklers; They winne, when truth overcomes. But it is a flight, to uſe fradulent ſhifts, oppoſing right reaſon with ſophiſtry, and when a man is overcome, & is aſhamed to yeeld, throw duſt in the eyes of his adverſary. That peeviſh and ungenerous point of honour is learned in our Schooles, never to yeeld any thing as long as one can maintaine it by right or wrong. One errour is defended by another, and a man comes to beleeve in earneſt, that which he had alledged before out of deſpaire.
It is alſo a point of moderation to conſider maturely what it was that gave occaſion to the opinions and practiſes which are deſervedly condemned. There is no doctrine ſo horrible, no diſorder ſo foule, but there is much to learne out of it. Looke to the ſource: Something will bee found obſcure or ill expounded in the termes of the received doctrine, or ſome exceſſe or defect in the ordinary practiſe, which gives occaſion of exceptions, and then of ſeperation, and againe of oppoſition and faction to ſcrupulous and turbulent ſpirits. There is no rebellion but was occaſioned by ſome fault in the Sate. Let us never looke upon thoſe publique tranſgreſſions but with a reflection upon the cauſes. Which if they be paſt our mending, we muſt try whether we may mend ourſelves by them; learning by the faults of others and the occaſions, moderation in our judgement, and compaſſion of humane weakeneſs, which is uncapable of a ſincere and conſtant keeping of any good, loſeth the benefit of good things by turning them to the wrong ſide, laboureth to cure one evill by a greater, and killeth the patient to heale the diſeaſe.
Solomon who had beheld all the good & evil of the world with a judicious eye, upon that diſcourſe giveth us this precept of moderation. Be not righteous overmuch, neither make thy ſelfe overwiſe. Eccleſ. 7.16. He that cenſureth too magiſtrally the evill that is done in the world by errour of judgement and raſhneſs of paſſion, conſidereth not enough the infirmity of mankind and his owne, and ſheweth that he knoweth not the world. Errour, vanity, ſuperſtition, the ruines of warre and the vices of peace, faire pretences and ill deeds, private ends cloaked with publique good, the advancement of few men conſiſting of the depreſſion of many, the zeale of idiots ſetting up a ladder for the riſing of the ambitious; All theſe are the courſe of the world. So it went before our time; So it will go after. Eccleſ. 7.10. Say not thou what is the cauſe that the former dayes were better then theſe? for thou doſt not inquire wiſely concerning this. Wiſemen are amazed at nothing, and make profit of all.