Four Books on Matthew 11, Book 3 · Chapter 127
CHAP. CXXVII.
A ſecond Property of Humility in reſpect of others is, To be fearfull of giving Offence-
SEcondly: Another thing in the behavior of an humble Spirit in reſpect of others is this, It is very fearful of giving offence to others, and not very ready to take offence from others. I will put both together. It will not give offence to others, and that you have very frequently in Scripture in Rom. 14. 10. But why doſt thou judg thy Brother? or why doſt thou ſet at naught thy Brother? We ſhall all ſtand before the judgment ſeat of Chriſt. Now this is in caſe of giving offence to others, that is the plain ſcope of this place, the Argument that is driven at in this 14. of the Romans, it is the Argument of giving offence to our Brethren, and here you may perceive in this place the Reaſon why men do not care what offence they give unto others, why they ſet at naught their Brethren, and judg them. Why doſt thou ſet at naught thy Brother? Why doſt thou make thy Brother as no body to thee? ſo the Greek, one that hath a proud heart, if he think he hath liberty himſelf for ſuch and ſuch things, what cares he for others? Others are offended and grieved, but what cares he for others? they are no body to him, he maketh nothing of them: For that is the word, Why doſt thou ſet at naught thy Brother, in being careleſs in giving offence unto thy Brother? Oh, this is the pride of thy heart, a gracious heart is loath to grieve any body in the world, ſo in the 15. verſe of this Chap. But if thy brother be grieved with thy meat, now walkeſt thou not Charitably, deſtroy not him with thy meat for whom Chriſt dyed. There the Apoſtle ſhewes, that he was loath, and ſo he would have all the Romans to be loath ſo much as to grieve their brother. O! this is a very gracious Lowly ſpirit indeed, that is ſo tender of others that he is not willing to grieve any one in the world, he is ſo with others, as he is afraid to be a grief to others; here is a Spirit that Jeſus Chriſt ſhall have a great deal of Glory from, that lives ſo, as that he is careful and very tender of grieving the ſpirits of others. It was a Speech once of a great Captain, a Roman, when others commended the great Exploits he did, I but ſaith he, I Bleſs God never any one wore a Mourning Garment for my ſake, Oh, It is a bleſſed thing, for a man or woman to go out of the world ſo, that every one can ſay, never any wore a mourning Garment for ſuch a man or woman. In Phillip. 2. 3. Let nothing be done through ſtrife, or vain glory, but in Lowlineſs of mind, let each eſteem others better then themſelves. Verſe, 4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man alſo on the things of others, let this mind be in you which was alſo in Jeſus Chriſt, who being in the form of God &c. Do not look upon your own things but upon the things of others, And be careful not to be offenſive to any body living, not to be occaſion of grief to any body. And ſo in Rom. 15. 2. Let every one of us pleaſe his Neighbor for his good to Edification, for even Chriſt pleaſed not himſelf, but as it is written, the reproaches of them that reproached thee fel upon me. We ſhould be careful not to pleaſe our ſelves but our Neighbor from the Example of Chriſt, now what is his Example? But that here in the Text, Learn of me for I am Lowly. Chriſt, though he were ſo great, that he ſtood in no need of any body he was God bleſſed for ever in himſelf, yet he did not ſeek to pleaſe himſelf but others, for the Text ſaith, for even Chriſt pleaſed not himſelf, but as it is written, the reproaches of them that reproached thee fel on me. Now ſtil this is in deference to the caſe of offence, for ſo you ſee in the beginning of the Chapter, We then that are ſtrong, ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to pleaſe our ſelves, Let every one pleaſe his Neighbor, not pleaſe our ſelf, but every one pleaſe our Neighbor, And that according to the example of Jeſus Chriſt, in this Lowlineſs of heart. To ſee Men and Women to walk ſo, as not to care to give content to any body but themſelves in the Family, they muſt have al the content and no body elſe pleaſed: And ſo among their Neighbors, ſocieties, and companies, they expect that every body in the Company ſhould ſpeak ſo as to pleaſe them, but they care not to ſpeak ſo as to pleaſe others: but here is the guiſe of a Lowly ſpirit, to be careful not ſo much to pleaſe it ſelf, as to pleaſe others, is careful not to offend others though it may not pleaſe it ſelf, is ſolicitous and ſtudious how he may give content to others, and no way to offend them, that he may no way be an offence unto another, and if they hear any thing that is offenſive indeed unto another, and is a grief to the Soul of another, they are much in the denial of themſelves in the thing they require, that they may give content to them; here is the guiſe of an humble Spirit, it is affraid to offend others. So in 1 Cor. 10. 32. 33. Give none offence, neither to the Jews, nor to the Genteles, nor to the Church of God, even as I pleaſe al men in al things, not ſeeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be ſaved.
You will ſay, We muſt be careful to give no offence to the Saints and Church of God; Nay, ſaith he, give not offence only to them, but to the Jew, the Gentiles and all that live about you, be careful to pleaſe them for good in all that you can, here is the Lowlineſs of the heart of Paul. So in 2 Cor. 6. 3. There you have another expreſſion of the gracious Lowlineſs of the heart of the Apoſtle, Giving no offence in any thing, that the miniſtery be not blamed, This he ſpeaks eſpecially as a miniſter, but it is true in all, but mark what principle it was that carried him, to make him ſo careful not to give offence, verſe, 4. But in all things approving our ſelves as the miniſters of God, in much patience, in neceſſities, in afflictions, in diſtreſſes, and ſo he goes on in verſe, 8. By Honor and diſhonor, by evil report and good report, as deceived and yet true, As if he ſhould ſay, we are willing to bear any thing in the World, rather then to give offence, we are willing to beare reproach, and to be accounted diſhonorable in the World, we are willing to bow down our Necks, to bow down our backs to any thing; this ſhould be the frame of Godly men and Women, of godly Chriſtians. Not as ſoon as ever any thing croſſeth them, preſently to fling off all, and regard nothing any more, No, but to ſubmit to every condition, rather then to be any waies offenſive unto others.
And then likewiſe you muſt take that in too, that an Humble Heart is not ready to take offence from others, as it is Pride of Spirit for one not to be careful of others whether they be offended or not offended, ſo on the other ſide it is Pride of Spirit to be ready to take offence from others, and by this meanes through their weakneſs they prove to be very burdenſome to others, the ground of their offence is only this, becauſe they think that every body muſt do as they themſelves, and becauſe they think that ſuch a thing is better, therefore others muſt do it, and if they do not it, then they are lofty, and then they are proud, and ſtout, and you ſhal many times have people that are very weak in pleading with others, if they cannot bring them to yeild to what they would have, they will break out into very unſeemly ſpeeches, that manifeſt that it is not only through weakneſs, and tenderneſs, but through the pride of their hearts, becauſe they would have every body do as they do. Now an humble ſpirit Reaſons thus, it is true, ſuch and ſuch do ſo and ſo▪ and indeed I do not ſee Reaſon why he doth ſo, but he or ſhe ſees more then I do, and therefore though I do not do that that they do, or dare not do that they dare do, yet becauſe they keep cloſe to God, and ſeek to know the mind of God, and are more able to ſearch into the mind of God then I am, and God hath revealed to them more then he hath to me, why ſhould I be offended at my brother, upon that Reaſon I may not be offended. This is an Argument of an humble Spirit. Indeed it is true, God doth give you leave, if the matter be of Conſequence, (if any one ſhould walk in a way that you ſhould take upon you in your conſcience that it is a juſt offence to you) to deſire and you may demand a Reaſon of them, and they are bound to give you a Reaſon (for we are bound to give a Reaſon of our Faith) if you come meerly in humility to ask a reaſon of any of our waies, ſo as that you might not be offended, and we ſee that it is through Tenderneſs of Spirit that you are offended, we ought to give account to any that we walk with, I do not ſpeak of any one in any ſociety only that ſhould demand a Reaſon, but if any man living upon the Earth ſhould come in an humble way, not in a peremptory, proud, and contentious way, to know, and deſire to know the grounds and Reaſons of our actions, becauſe they fear our actions are not according to God, we are bound to do it upon that in Paul, Give no offence neither to Jew, nor to the Gentiles, nor to the Church of God: If we muſt give no offence, then certainly we are bound to give an account of our …ctions, ſo as to ſatisfie thoſe that are offended, now though you may require a Reaſon for ſatisfaction, yet when you have a Reaſon, (unleſs it be very apparent to the contrary) ſuppoſe you your ſelves be not ſatisfied, yet if you ſee ſuch and ſuch do walk cloſe with God otherwiſe, then you are rather to judg and think that God hath revealed more to them then he hath to you; and ſo rather to leave them to God then to be ready to be offended, or ſtil continue to be offended, becauſe they do not do as you do, and do not judg what you do to be right, there is a great deal of difference between the natural complections of ſome. As for example, ſome have not their Spirits ſo taken with the things of Religion as others have, and yet are very faithful to God, and keep cloſe to God. Truths they come in by degrees one after another, and therefore it is a notorious and abominable pride in men, to judg of others that they ſhut their Eyes againſt the light, and that they ſin againſt their conſcience becauſe they do not the things that they do. That is the ſecond thing in the behavior of an humble ſpirit in reſpect of others, it is afraid of giving offence to others, and it is not ready to take offence from others.