A Treatise of Conversion, Chapter 1 · Section 12
SECT. XII.
WE are next to consider how the work of Conversion doth turn the heart or will of man to these means that stand in a subordination to Christ. And indeed a natural man is disaffected not onelyonly to Christ, but to all his Ordinances: he that mindeth not the end nor the chief means, cannot heartily mind the subordinate means.
1. One means that God hath appointed to salvation, is, Confession of sin, with a broken heart for the sin confessed: A man unconverted, doth neither see any such evil in sin as to drive him to this confession, nor to break his heart in godly sorrow; nor will his heart be brought to consent to the faithful performance of that. A heart unhumbled and unchanged doth think it but a piece of childish folly to weep and mourn for sin and lament it before the world; they are too stout to stoop to a disgracefull acknowledgement. They scorn to be so base as to make an open confession of their sins, or to lament their misery: They feel no such burden upon their consciences as should driven them into such repentance, to seek to God and man for ease: And if they confess to God in secret, it is without a broken heart. They will not endure so much pain as to feel their own condition, and have their sores so faithfully searched as is necessary to a cure: this afflicting of the soul their souls abhorre.
But when converting Grace hath changed their hearts, oh how the case is altered with them! then godly sorrow is even as it were natural to them, and they that could not indure it, do now even cherish and indulge it. It is a voluntary sorrow; they mourn and would mourn like him that cryed out, Labour not to comfort me, Esay 22. 4. That is, till God will comfort me: As a sore that is not ripe, will not break nor run; and that which is not suppurable is oft uncurable: but when it is brought to suppuration and ripeness, then it will even break of it self, and run without any more ado; So is it with the impenitent soul and the Penitent: till repentance comes, the soul is not ripe. Ministers are every day applying to it all the mollifying dissolving remedies they can devise to bring it to suppuration, but all will not do; their hearts will not break; not a tear of unfeigned repentance will come forth: they hide their sin and scorn to make a penitent confession. But oh, when Grace hath done the work, and softned the heart, and ripened the sore, then it will come out of its own accord: I would not have you take this upon my bare word, but see whether the Scripture say not so before me, Acts 2. 37. They were once a stubborn generation of sinners, that the Apostles had there to deal withal, that durst have their hands in the blood of Christ himself. But when they were once converted, they were pricked at the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the Apostles, Men and brethren what shall we do? This did imply a confession of their sin: q. d. We confess our selves guilty, and we find our souls in a miserable case under the wrath and curse of God: Oh give us your advise what we shall do. These were 3000. people at once, that were brought to this conviction and confession. See how freely all comes out when the heart is once pricked by the Word and Spirit. The like you know was the case of Saul at his conversion, Act. 9, 5, 6. as stout a hearted sinner before as another; but when God over-powred him by converting Grace, then he cals out with trembling and astonishment, Lord, what wilt thou have me to do? And when he relateth his own life and manner of conversion, Act. 22. 4, 5. how freely doth he confess his former persecution! And again in Act. 26. 10, 11. confessing that he was a persecutor, yea and punished Christians in the Synagogue, and compelled them to blasphems; yea … yea exceedingly mad against them The like doth he confess, Tit. 3. 3. Acts 16. the Apostles met with a stirdy Jaylor, that put them in the Inner-prison, and their feet fast in the stocks: but when an Earthquake opened the doors and set them free, and a heart-quake brought him in and laid him at their feet, and Grace took the opportunity to do its work; then he cryeth out with trembling, ver. 30. Sirs, what must I do to be saved? David tels you his own experience, Psal. 32. 5, 6. I acknowledged my sins unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid; I said I will confess my transgression to the Lord, and thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin; For this shall every one that is godly pray to thee in a time when thou mayst be found: And after his grievous fall, the 51 Psal. will shew you his confession. So Act. 19. 18. Many confessed and shewed their deeds, and brought their books and burned them befored all men: These were such as were reputed wise and learned before: but when Grace had changed them, they openly confess that all was folly: Many more such examples we have, and Precepts where God requireth it. Ezra 10. 1. Neh. 9, 2. 3. Lev. 5. 5. & 16. 21. & 26. 40. Num. 5. 7. And indeed pardon it self is offered on these terms, 1 Joh. 1. 9. If we confess, he is faithful and just to forgive. Prov. 28. 13. He that covereth his sins shall not prosper; but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy. Jam. 5. 16. Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another: and indeed in the first times, no man was baptized that did not confess his sins openly before, and renounce them; even John himself caused the Jews to confess their sins before he would baptize them, Matth. 3. 6. Mar. 1. 5. So in Jer. 3. 12, 13. Return thou back-sliding Israel saith the Lord, and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon you; for I am merciful, saith the Lord: and I will not keep mine anger for ever; only confess thine iniquity, that thou hast transgressed against the Lord, &c. Turn Oh back-sliding Children, saith the Lord, for I am married to you &c. You see here that conversion hath ever confession accompanying it. He that turneth must and will confess: as the repenting Church, Jer. 14. 20. We acknowledge O Lord our wickedness, and the iniquity of our Fathers, for we have sinned against thee; do not abhor us for thy Names sake: and Hos. 5. 15. It was the Lords threatning against them, I will go and returne unto my place, till they acknowledge their offence, and seek my face: in their afflictions they, will seek me early: So that its most evident, that conversion openeth the heart and mouth to confess, even to God or man, or both, according as the case requireth. Not, but that a Judas will do it at last in horror, and cry out, I have sinned in betraying the innocent blood: but this is forced by horror, and not by a gracious change: Many a thief will confess their sin at the Gallows, that are not converted: But when conversion comes, the very mind being changed, is set against the sin, and therefore they long to cast it up: hiding tendeth to keeping, confession tendeth to parting with sin: Therefore he that is penitent doth not hide it, so far as he hath any call to confess it. Oh Sirs, that the Lord would bring this to the hearts of some of you that most need it! One may hear by your speeches, that conversion is far from your hearts. How many among us are there that have little cause to justifie themselves, and yet we cannot bring them to any confession, but what is general and common with all, that we are sinners! But for any hateful and disgraceful sin, they excuse it and hide it; and have nothing but good almost to say of themselves: you shall not hear one sad complaint almost that they will make against themselves, If you have a froward wife, you will complain of that; if disobedient children, if careless or stubborn servants, you will complain of them. If you have unkind friends of neighbors, you will complain of them: but of your selves, where you have greatest reason to complain, we can scarce hear a word. If any do you wrong, you are still harping upon it and making the worst of it; but for all the wrong that you have done to God & our own souls, you can lightly pass it over, and make little of it: and who heareth you half so oft complain of your selves as others: what say you? is it not thus with many among us? you know not how sad a mark this is: I tell you, if ever converting Grace come to your hearts, it will make you pour out complaints against your selves. It will make you cry with David, I have done foolishly, 2. Sam. 24. 10. and with Paul, 1 was foolish, disobedient, I was mad, yea exceeding mnd, Act. 26. 11. Tit. 3. 3. and O wretched man that I am, who shall deliver me! Rom. 7. 24. Mark the unconverted man in his talk, and you shall hear him, if not as the Pharisee, saying, I am not like other men, yet at least saying nothing against himself, but nibling at the good names of others, and making the Devil more servants then indeed the hath, and God fewer, by their ventrous censures: they have the Hypocrites eye that was not made to see it self, that is good for little, but to spy motes in others eys! but the beam in their own they cannot see: The infirmities of those that fear God they can talk of; but a graceless heart and a worldly fleshly life of their own doth little trouble them. But when converting Grace comes, you may hear by their very talk that the case is changed; they have no body then to talk against, so much as themselves: their censures against themselves do seem the most uncharitable; their talk is most of the sins of their own hearts and lives, and blame them not; for these are neerest them and most concern them: the mote in their own eye doth most grieve them, and till they have wiped out that, they have less mind to look into the eyes of others. In a word, whosoever is justified of God and freed from condemnation, is a judger and condemner of himself, 1 Cor. 11. 31. but they that lye under the condemnation of God, are commonly self-justifiers, Luke 16. 15.