Obedient Patience, Chapter 2 · Case 14
CASE. XIV.
Weakness of Grace, Knowledge, Faith, Love, Comfort, Great Corruptions.
XIV. IT is one of the greatest burdens to an upright Soul, to be kept under spiritual languishing and weakness, and to have but a low degree of grace: When knowledge is so small that it will not free us from daily uncertainties about Truth, and Duty, and Sin; and all that plead for their several opinions, perplex us; and Scripture seemeth unintelligible to us, and we do but grope after God as in the dark, and are overwhelmed with strange unsatisfied thoughts, of God, and of Christ, and of the World which we are going to.
When Faith is so weak, that we trust Christ for Heaven and Earth, with fear, and unquietness, and much distrust; and can scarce tell whether our Faith overcome the World, and our trusting Christ for Heaven would make us forsake Earth and Life, rather than chuse to hazard it by wilful sin; when doubts and fears do tell us that we have little Faith.
What a Calamity is it, when our hopes of Heaven do so little rejoyce us, that every worldly suffering seems strong enough to quell and quench our joy: Yea, we have more dread than desire, more trouble than joy when we think of dying, and of the next Life?
What a Calamity is it, when our Love to God, and Christ, and Glory is so small, that we are in fear that we love more this Body, and wordly Prosperity, and Pleasure? When all the thoughts of Gods essential Goodness, his Love and mercy to us and others, and all the wonderful Love and Mercy of our Redeemer, and all the Mercies on Earth, and Promises of Heaven, will scarce warm our hearts with Love and thankful joy in God? And yet we can easily Love and overlove our flesh, our House, our Lands, our friends, and fanciful amoursness is a Common disease.
What a Calamity is it that we have no more Government of our thoughts, to keep out Coveteousness, Pride and Lust, and to cast out Satans abominable Temptations.
And that when we know that God tryeth us to exercise our patience, we can no better overcome fear, anger, grief and discontent? Should we be Patient Under all this want of Grace.
Answ. This is to me the greatest burden in this World, and I suppose it is so to all sound Christians, as to considerate trouble of mind, tho loss of friends or bodily pains may stir up more passion. That which was before said about uncertainty of Salvation, must be taken in about this Case.
And, 1. Let us make sure of our sincerity before we talk of our imperfections if we can know that we have the truth of special grace, we may know what to say to the Case of our infirmities. And for that still remember what I said before about the sincerity of faith: If you have so well thought of this World and the next, and of the Gospel of Christ, that you are soundly resolved to trust Christ for grace and glory, to the forsaking of all that stands against it, you have saving faith and title to Salvation. I opened it before to you by two similitudes, of a patient that practically trusteth his Physician, and a poor Prisoner that practically trusteth one that promiseth him a Lordship in a Forreign Land: Tho you venture with fear and trembling, if you will venture all on Christ, and leave all for him, so far as he requireth you, it is saving faith. Practically trust him, and he will save you.
2. When you are got thus far, remember that as you were born in sin, so you too long lived in it: Sin had a long time to darken your understandings, and harden your hearts, and corrupt your wills, and set you at a greater distance from God: And do think that all this must be undone and cured easily and in a moment, or as soon as you desire it? It is an unspeakable mercy that it is so far cured, as that you are translated from death to life, and made new Creatures, and the Heirs of Heaven; And moreover that Christ hath undertaken the perfect cure in his time and way. Grace somewhat imitateth nature: You were not born as soon as Conceived, nor were you at ripe age as soon as born. Your growth and strength came by degrees in time, you had not your Learning all at once, but by long Study. You get not your Riches by Trading or labour in a few daies: Your Land brings not fruit to perfection as soon as it is sowed; nor your Trees so soon as they are graft or planted: And must not so great a work as the Cure and Sanctifiing of a Soul be done by such degrees?
3. And consider that you must not be meer patients, but also Agents in the increase of your grace and strength: It must be had by exercise; the frequent acts must increase the Habits; and God will not do it all without you: He hath appointed you means to use, and will try and exercise your obedience therein. As he giveth not life and strength to those that will not take their food, nor the fruit of the Earth without our labour, so neither hath he promised to give more grace, save in the patient use of the means which he hath appointed. Time, Means and diligence are needful.
4. And alas most Christians are too slothful, and use means negligently, and then look, that God should give them as much grace, at their meer wish and Prayer, as if they were laborious and diligent. And too many do venture on sin, and so keep under grace, by careless living.
5. And some unskilfully use means for one sort of grace, when it is another that they most need, and should use the means accordingly. When they should excite and feed their faith and hope and holy Love, by the consideration of Gods truth and goodness, and his Love in Christ, and by Heavenly Doctrine and thoughts endeavour to get a Heavenly mind, some study small controversies, and some perplex themselves with scruples about duties and sins of their own making, and some plunge themselves into confounded and bewilding thoughts, and think over again all Satans Temptations; and some only strive to get a more passionate weeping sorrow; And much neglect all serious endeavours for a believing, Loving, joyful Soul.
6. You must remember that many Christians grow in grace and do not know it, but think that they go backward, or have none: Because they do not sufficiently observe wherein the nature of Sanctification doth principally consist: Some lay it on passion, and some on Memory, and some on the belief of their own sincerity, Justification and Salvation, and some on words and free expression, whereas it chiefly consisteth in the Estimation of the Judgments, the Resolution of the Will, and the Obedience of our Lives: If you esteem Gods Grace and Glory better, and sin worse, and the World to be good or bad, as it serveth grace or sin; then you grow in understanding: If you are more firmly resolved to place your hopes, and make your choice according to this estimation, and to please God, and secure Grace and Glory, whatever it cost you, and to avoid wilfull sin, which is your danger, and to use the World for holy ends, especially if you Love Wisdom, and Holiness, and Justice better, and hate sin more than you did heretofore, then your Will doth grow in grace. And if you shew this Will and choice in more Obedience of Life, avoiding known sin more, and endeavouring to do good, and devoting your selves more entirely to God, then you grow in holyness of Life: Tho your memories grow weaker, and tho your holy passions and feelings should grow less, and are less able for long Meditation, or to keep an order or steadiness in your thoughts, and tho you want words in Prayer and discourse, and tho fears and peevish angryness and troubling thoughts should by weakness or Temptation get more advantage of you, yet all this stands with rootedness and growth in grace.
7. Forget not what you were heretofore: Had you not formerlly a higher esteem of worldly things, and less fear of sinning than you have now. Growth in Grace may be like the growth of your Trees, or Corn, or Flowers, or the shaddow on your Dial: You do not see these grow or move: But if you come after a sufficient time, you may see that they are grown: We are Bigger at Age than in Child-hood, and yet we never saw our selves grow? It is by insensible degrees: Strong Christians have more knowledge then they had, and a more fixed resolution for God and Heaven, and a greater contempt of Worldly vanity, and Victory over fleshly desires and wilfull sin, tho they perceive not how these grow.
8. Be thankful that you desire to be better: Those desires (as is aforesaid) prove sincerity, and are the Earnests of what you do desire, and are a greater blessing than all the Riches of the World: God that gave them you will not see them lost: The grace which we have on Earth is desiring seeking grace; desires are our best Evidence here; Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after Righteousness; for they shall be satisfied hereafter. We must know the difference between Earth and Heaven: Its there that we shall have all that we desire. Here desiring and seeking is our work: Perfection is the prize and Crown: Which is not to be had till we have done our Race and Warfare: The Womb is but the place of preparation for what is to be enjoyed in the open World; and no great matters are there to be expected: We must not look for more on Earth, than its part.
9. And when all is done God is a free Agent, and giveth his grace in such variety as he please, and doth not give to all alike: As she freely diversifieth Nature and Common gifts, so doth he several degrees of grace. It is an unspeakable mercy to have so much as shall save us from the Hell which we deserve, and give us right to life Eternal; tho we yet are faint through weakness, and have not the strength and comfort which we desire.
10. And tho we have yet much Corruption left uncured; …we have helps appointed us to overcome them: And the exercise of Grace against all such Enemies, is much of its glory, and sheweth its amiable worth, as darkness sets out the worth of light, and sickness of health, and death of life: Diseases occasion the Honour of our Physician: Where sin hath abounded, grace hath superabounded: The whole need not the Physician: We must have daily use for Christ, both to pardon us, and to cure us: God could have prevented Adams fall; but he hath permited it, and permiteth all the sin in the World, tho he cause it not: And he knoweth how to use it to his glory. All Souls in Heaven were once sinful, saving Christs: We must daily be washed in his blood; we shall never perform a duty so innocently as to need no Saviour and pardoning grace: where there is is no Enemy there is no War: And where there is no War there is no victory; and where there is no Victory there is no Tryumph.
11. And that God who freely pardoned all our Reigning sins before Conversion, will surely pardon all our meer infirmities, when we renew our faith and our Repentance: He that through Christ can forgive such as were Enemies, will forgive a Son: And being reconciled by Christs death, we shall be saved by his life.
Not that any of these Considerations should reconcile us to sin, or abate our hatred of it: It must be our grief that any thing should cleave to us which is hateful to God, and which killed Christ, and which is so contrary to holyness and Heaven: But use no such impatience as hindereth the sense of the Love of God, or the grace of Christ, or the thankful acknowledgment of his mercy: Fight against sin as well as you can, and serve your Lord as well as you are able: But do not sit down and cry, because sin is too strong for you, and because you can serve God no better; complain to Christ in order to beg his help and grace: But use not complaint instead of endeavour, nor any trouble which hindereth duty.
Thank God that you are weary of sin, and say with Paul, O wretched Man, who shall deliver me, so you will but say next, [I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord;] And now you are weary and heavy laden, come to Christ for ease and rest. And Remember that (if you were ungodly) you could once have endured sin without weariness? Who heard you then impatiently cry out against it: Yea you were loath to think of leaving it. And look about you on the multitude of the ungodly, and you shall see how far they are from being impatient with their sin, tho it be mortal; when they can scarce be patient towards him that would but save them from it. They grudge, at God because he will not give them leave to sin, and not because he doth not Cure them: O how contrary is the impatience of Saints and wicked sinners.
12. While you remember what grace you want, remember also both what you have received, and what is promised you: that Thankfulness and Hope may keep you from discouragement. You are not cured, but you are alive; and Christ hath promised you a Cure. In many things we all offend, Jam. 2. 2. He that saith he hath no sin is a Lyar. 1 John 1. 8. Paul tells us that he had not obtained perfection, but he rejoyced that he was pressing towards the mark. Phil. 3. 12, 13. We may rejoyce that our Captain hath overcome the World, John 16. 33. And he will shortly bruise Satan under our feet. Rom. 16. 20. and 7. last. Christ that cured all bodily diseases on Earth, will cure spiritual blindness, lameness, and deadness too, if we have but grace enough to go to him for more.
13. Lastly, the more weary you are of sin and weakness, and the more desirous you are to know God better, and love him more, and praise him with greater chearfulness and joy, the more you should long to be with Christ: Heaven will deliver you from all imperfection; from all darkness, unbelief and dulness; from all sad uncomfortable thoughts, and from all both alluring and molesting temptations: O that we could believe that more strongly, and then our honest impatience with sin and imperfection, would but quicken us to the means of of our deliverance, and help our joy in the foresight of that blessed change, which will leave no matter of discontent, and will give us more than we could here desire.
But to those who are overmuch dejected at their imperfections and remaining faults, I add these Cautions. 1. See that it be not the disgrace, or the outward troublesome fruits of your sin, which grieve you more than the sin it self.
2. Take heed, lest while you complain of your badness, there be no secret pride and hypocrisie, to make you angry with those that think you but as bad as you call your self: Its an odd kind of contradiction, at once to be impatient because we are so bad, and also impatient with them that take us to be so; and not to endure another to say that of us which we say our selves.
3. The worse you take your selves and your sins to be, the more you should esteem, and desire a Saviour and his Grace to heal you, and rejoyce that a full remedy is at hand, and freely offered you; and be the more thankful for that mercy which is given, and which is promised to so unworthy Sinners.
4. Shew your impatience with sin and wants by hating sin, and diligent using the means of cure, and not by idle discouraged despairing complaints.
5. Remember that our Head is perfect for us; His Merits and Righteousness are perfect; He is fully perfected in Glory; and is it nothing that he is related to us, as our Surety, Saviour, and Head? He hath his glory for our good.
6. Remember that no sin or imperfection shall condemn us, but that which we had rather keep than leave, and love more than we hate it: And that all things are tollerable which will end in Heaven. We groan, being burdened both with sin and sorrow in the Flesh: But we wait for full deliverance from the bondage of corruption, into the glorious liberty of the Sons of God.