Acts and Monuments Volume 2 Part 2, Book 11 · Account 39 · Letter 18
An other letter of Iohn Careles to A.B. a faithfull Minister of the Lorde, containing certaine frutefull precepts of Matrimonie.
I Beseech the same euerlasting Lord (my deare and faithful brother) that blessed yong Tobias with his wife Sara,A letter of Iohn Careles to A. B. a faythfull seruaunt of Christ. & brought them together in due time with reuerence and feare, preserue and blesse you both, and your seede after you, that they may encrease the number of the faithful by thousandes and thousandes. And as the Lord of his great mercy and fatherly prouidēce hath bene alwaies carefull for you, and nowe hath for your comforte accomplished his good worke in coupling you with a faithfull mate: so see that you be thankefull for his prouidence towardes you, that it may eueryevery way in you be an encrease of louelove & godlinesse, yea of Christian ioye and gladnesse in these sorrowfull dayes: but yet so, that you mourne with the true mourners of Syon, and be sorie (yet in measure) for the hurt of the same. Pray also in faith for her prosperity, that the Lord may builde vp the walles of Hierusalem againe.
Oh that the Lord would turne Syons captiuity as the riuer,Psal. 146. into the South: Then shoulde our hearts be made glad, and oure mouthes filled with laughter. Then woulde the heathen hypocrites say: the Lord hath done much for them. Oh, the Lord hath done great things for vsus already: wherof let vsus heartely reioyce and praise his name therefore. For though we nowe sowe wyth teares, yet shall wee be sure to reape with gladnesse: and as wee now goe foorth weeping, bearing foorth good seede, so shall we come againe with ioy, and bring our sheaues full of corne. Yea,The death of the Martyrs is the lyfe of the Gospell. the death of the Martyrs (which is most precious in hys sighte) shalbe the life of the Gospell, spite of the Papists hearts.
Pray for me (deare heart) that I may be counted worthy to so we some seede amongest the sweete Saintes of the Lorde, that I may reape the same againe without ceasing, at the haruest. It is nowe sowing time of the yeare, men saye in the countrey,A sowing tyme in Christes Church. and I thinke that I shall make an ende of sowing before all Marche be past; for I heare say that I shall prooue how my plough will enter into the stonie ground of the hard hearted Papists, within these 4 daies. I hope to holde fast, and not to looke backe, neyther for feare nor flattery, vntil I hauehave made an ende of sowing, and then will I set me downe and rest me, and aske them all no leaue, and looke for the liuely fruite and encrease thereof with ioye and gladnesse.
My deare brother, the time approcheth neare (I praise God therefore) that I must put off this sinnefull tabernacle, and goe home to my heauenly father,This counsell was that he should marry, notwithstanding certayne lettes whereby Sathan sought to hinder his mariage. where diuers of my deare brethren are all ready, looking and wishing for me. I beseeche you therefore that you will helpe me forewarde with your faithfull prayers, as I know you doe, for I doe feele the comfort and commoditye thereof.
That you hauehave obserued my simple counsel, I am right glad, and I trust in the Lord God, you shall finde comfort in the same. And that you may so doe in deede, I hauehave bene so bold to wryte these few woordes vntounto you, because I shall see you no more in this corruptible life, therefore marke them well. First and aboue all things, you must be very circumspecte to keepe the bande of louelove,The roote of bitternes to be weded out with the spade of patience. and beware that there neuer spring vp the roote of bitternesse betweene you. If at any time there happē to rise any cause of vnkindnesse betweene you (as it is vnpossible alwayes to be free from it) see that you weede vppe the same with all lenitie, gentlenesse and patience, and neuer suffer your selfe, nor youre wife to sleepe in displeasure.
How & when the husband ought to reproue.If you hauehave cause to speake sharpelye, and sometimes to reprooue, beware that you do not the same in the presence of other: but kepe your woordes vntil a conuenient time (whych is the poynt of a wise man, saith Salomon) and then vtter them in the spirite of meekenesse and the groning spirit of perfect louelove: which you must also let sometimes to couer faultes, and wincke at them if they be not intollerable. What so euer losse and mischance shal happen vntounto you,Faultes sometyme must be couered with louelove. take it paciently, and beare it merely· and though the same shuld come partly through your wiues negligence, yet let it rather be a louing warninge to take heede in time to come, then a cause of sorow for that which is past & cannot be holpen. I knowe by mine owne experience, that we are in this life subiecte to many inconueniences,Not to take vnkindenes for eueryevery trifle. and that of nature we are prone to displeasure, and ready to thinke vnkindnes for eueryevery little trifle, and specially with oure best friendes, yea soonest with our louing wiues, whiche bee moste lothest to displease vsus.
But let vsus beware of this cankered corruption, and consider that we ought most of all, in louelove to beare with them, according to Christes example towardes his congregation, for whome he gaue him self to clense it. &c. I had thought to hauehave treated thys matter at large, but euen nowe I am interrupted and otherwyse letted. I doubt not but you know your duetie therein a greate deale better then I can declare it vntounto you, and as you knowe it, so will doe it: but I louelove to be bolde with you. I entend to write also to your wife very shortly, and so take my last farewel of you for euer in this worlde. And thus in greate haste I am nowe constraind to make an end. The blessing of god be alwais with you.
Your owne for euer Iohn Careles. Pray, pray, pray with faith.