A Sovereign Antidote to Drive out Discontent, Chapter 2
CHAP. II.
2. BEcauſe ſuffering is the only way to prevent ſuffering; Revenge being one of thoſe remedies, which, not ſeldom, proves more grievous than the diſeaſe it ſelf. When once Xantippe, the wife of Socrates, in the open ſtreet pluckt his cloak from his back; and ſome of his acquaintance counſelled him to ſtrike her: he anſwers, You ſay well; that while we are brawling and fighting together, every one of you may clap us on the back & cry; Hoe, well ſaid, to it Socrates: yea well done Xantippe, the wiſeſt of the twain. When Ariſtippus was asked by one in deriſion, where the great high friendſhip was become, that formerly had been between him and Aeſchines? he anſwers, It is aſleep, but I will go and awaken it; and did ſo, leaſt their enemies ſhould make it a matter of rejoycing. When Philip of Macedon was told that the Graecians ſpake evil words of him, notwithſtanding he did them much good, and was withall counſelled to chaſtiſe them; he anſwers, Your counſel is not good, for if they now ſpeak evil of us, having done them good only; what would they then if we ſhould do them any harm? And at another time, being counſelled either to baniſh, or put to death one who had ſlandered him; he would do neither of both, ſaying, It was not a ſufficient cauſe to condemn him: and for baniſhing, it was better not to let him ſtirre out of Macedonia, where all men knew that he lyed; th…n to ſend him among ſtrangers, who not knowing him, might admit his ſlanders for truth: better he ſpeak where we are both known, then where we are both unknown. And this made Chryſippus, when one complained to him, that his friend had reproached him privately; anſwer, Ah, but chide him not, for then he will do as much in publike▪ Neglect will ſooner kill an injury, than Revenge. Theſe tongue-ſquibs, or crackers of the brain, will die alone, if we revive them not: the beſt way to have them forgotten by others, is firſt to forget them our ſelves. Yea, to contemn an enemy, is better then either to fear him, or anſwer him. When the Paſſenger gallops by, as if his fear made him ſpeedy, the Cur followes him with open mouth and ſwiftness: let him turn to the brawling Cur, and he will be more fierce; but let him ride by in a confident neglect, and the Dog will never ſtir at him, or at leaſt will ſoon give over and be quiet. Wherefore, when aſperſed, labour as the eclipſed Moon, to keep on our motion, till we wade out of the ſhadow, and receive our former ſplendor. To vex other men, is but to prompt them how they ſhould again vexus. Two earthen pots floating on the water, with this Inſcription, If we knock, we crack; was long ago made the Emblem of England and the Low-Countreys. When two friends fall out, if one be not the wiſer, they turn love into anger and passion, passion into evil words, words into blows; and when they are fighting a third adverſary hath a fair advantage to inſult over them both, As have you not ſometimes ſeen two neighbours, like two Cocks of the Game pick out one anothers eyes, to make the Lawyers ſport; it may be kill them? As while Iudah was hot againſt Iſrael and Iſrael hot againſt Iudah, the King of Syria ſmot them both. At leaſt Sathan that common and arch enemy will have us at advantage. For as vain men delight when two Dogs, or two Cocks are a fighting, to encourage and prick them forward to the combate: Even ſo doth Satan deal with us; Controverſies▪ like a pair of Cudgels, are thrown in by the Devill, and taken up by male-contents, who baſte one another while he ſtands by and laughs. And we cannot pleaſe the Devill better: for as the Maſter of the Pit oft ſets two Cocks to fight together, unto the death of them both; and then after mutuall conqueſt, ſuppeth perchance with the fighters bodies: Even ſo, ſaith Gregory, doth the Devil deal with men. He is an enemy that watcheth his time and while we wound one another, he wounds and wins all our ſouls. Thus, like the Frog and the Mouſe in the Fable; while men fight eagerly for a toy (the Kite comes (that Prince, and chief Foul that rul…th in the aire,) and ſnatcheth away both theſe great warriours. Or, like two Emmets in the mole hill of this earth, we fight for the maſtery; in mean while comes the Robin-red breaſt and picks both up, and ſo devours them. But on the other ſide, by gentleness we may as much pleaſure our ſelves. It is ſaid of Ariſtides, when he perceived the open ſcandall which was like to ariſe, by reaſon of the contention ſprung up between him and Themiſtocles, that he beſought him mildly after this manner: Sir, we both are no mean men in this Common wealth; our diſſention will prove no ſmall offence unto others, nor diſparagement to our ſelves: wherefore good Themiſtocles, let us be at one again; and if we will needs ſtrive, let us ſtrive who ſhall excell other in vertue and love. Ariſtippus and Aeſchines two famous Philoſophers, being fallen at variance, Ariſtippus came to Aeſchines, and ſaies, Shall we … friends again? Yes, with all my heart, ſaies Aeſchines; Remember th… ſaith Ariſtippus, that though I be your elder, yet I ſought for peace: tru… ſaith Aeſchines, and for this, I will ever ackowledge you the more worthy man; for I began the ſtrife and you the peace. And we read of Euclid… that when his Brother (in a variance between them) ſaid, I would I migh… die if I be not revenged of thee; he anſwered again, Nay, let me die for it▪ if I perſwade thee not otherwiſe before I have done: by which one wo… he preſently ſo won his Brothers heart, that he changed his minde, and they parted friends. Milde words, and gentle behaviour may be reſembled to Milk, that quencheth Wild fire; or Oyl, that quencheth Lime which b… water is kindled. And this was Davids way of overcoming, 1 Sam. 24▪ He whoſe Harp had wont to quiet Sauls frenzie, now by his kindness, dot… calm his fury, ſo that now he ſheds tears inſtead of blood: here was a victory gotten, and no blow ſtricken. The King of Iſrael ſet bread and water before the hoſt of the King of Syria, when he might have ſlain them, 2 King 6.23▪ What did he loſe by it? or, had he cauſe to repent himſelf? No, he did thereby ſo prevent ſucceeding quarrels, that as the Text ſaith▪ the bands o… Aram came no more into the Land of Iſrael; And ſuch a conqueſt is like that which Evagrius recordeth of the Romans, namely, That they got ſuch a victory over Coſroes, one of the Perſian Kings, that this Coſroes made a Law, that never after, any Kings of Perſia ſhould move warre againſt the Romans. Actions ſalved up w…th a free forgiveness, are as not done▪ ſo every wiſe Chriſtian will do good to them that do hurt to him, yea bleſſe and pray for them that curſe him, as our Saviour adviſeth▪ neither is he a fool in it, for if grace comes (and nothing will procure it ſooner than prayers and good examples) though before they were evil enemies; now they ſhall neither be evil, nor enemies. It was a witty anſwer of Socrates, who replied when one asked him, why he took ſuch a mans bitter railing ſo patiently. It is enough for one to be angry at a time. For if a wiſe man contend with a fooliſh man, ſaith Solomon, whether he be angry, or laugh, there is no reſt. Prov. 29.9. whereas gentle ſpeech appeaſeth wrath, and patience bridleth the ſecret pratlings of mockers, and blunteth the point of their reproach. Had not Gideon, Judg. &. learned to ſpeak fair as well as to ſmite, he had found work enough from the ſwords of Ioſephs ſonnes, but his good words are as victorious as his ſword: his pacification of friends better than his execution of enemies, Verſ. 2, 3
Satyrus, knowing himſelf cholerick and in that whirry of mind apt to tranſgreſſe, when he but ſuſpected ill language from any, he would ſtop his cars with wax, leſt the ſenſe of it ſhould cauſe his fierce blood to ſeeth in his diſtempered skin. And Caeſar, although he could moderate his passions, having in that civil garboyl intercepted a Packet of Letters written to Pompey from his Favorites, brake them not open but burnt them immediately. And Pompey committed thoſe Letters to the f…re before he read them, wherein he expected to find the cauſe of his grief. Rage is not ingendred, but by the concurrence of cholers, which are eaſily produced one of another, and born at an inſtant. When the ſtone and the sseel meets, the iſſue ingendred from thence is fire, w…ereas the ſword of anger being ſtruck upon the ſoft pillow of a milde ſpirit, is broken. The ſhot of the Cannon hurts not Wool, and ſuch like yeilding things, but that which is hard, ſtubborn, and reſiſting. He is fuller of passion than reaſon, that will flame at every vain tongues puff: A man that ſtudies revenge, keeps his own wounds green and open, which otherwiſe would heal and do well. Anger to the ſoul, is like a coal on the fleſh, or garment, caſt it off ſuddenly, it doth little harm, but let it lye, it frets deep. Wherefore ſaith one, their malice ſhall ſooner ceaſe than my unchanged patience. A ſmall injury ſhall go as it comes, a great injury may dine or ſup with me, but none at all ſhall lodge with me, for why ſhould I vex my ſelf, becauſe another hath vexed me? That were to imitate the fool that would not come out of the Pound, ſaying, They had put him in b… Law, and he would come out again by Law: or Ahab, who becauſe he could not have his will on Naboth, would be revenged on himſelf. As the mad man tears his own hair, becauſe he cannot come at his enemies, Or Thamar, who defiled her ſelf, to be revenged of her Father in law Iudah. Or the Hedg hog, which having laden himſelf with Nuts and fruits, if but the leaſt Filberd chance to fall off, as he is going to disburden them in his ſtore-houſe, will fling down all the reſt, in a peeviſh humour, and beat the ground for anger, as Pliny writes. Or Dogs, which ſet upon the ſtone that hath hurt them, with ſuch irefull teeth, that they hurt themſelves more than the thrower hurt them; and feel greater ſmart from themſelves, than from their enemy: which makes Archelaus ſay, it is a great evill, not to be able to ſuffer evill. And certainly if we well conſider it, we ſhall meet with vexations enough that we cannot avoid if we would never ſo fain. We need not (like Cercion in Suidas) wreſtle, or (with fooliſh Pannus) go to law with every man we meet. And yet ſome (as if they did delight to vex their own ſouls,) like the Ethiopians, who, as Diodorus relates, lame themſelves if their King be lame.
I might go on, and ſhew you, that Greece and Aſia were ſet on fire for an Apple: That, not a few have ſuffered a ſword in their bowels, becauſe they would not ſuffer the lye in their throats: And laſtly, I might ſhew, that if we ſuffer not here with patience, we ſhall ſuffer hereafter with grief; for the wages of anger is judgement, even the judgment of hell fire, Mat. 5, 22.