A Counterpoison, Religious treatise · Chapter 19
CHAP. XIX
That suffering is the onelyonly may to prevent suffering.
3. BEcause suffering is the onelyonly way to prevent suffering: Revenge being one of those remedies, which, not seldome proves more grievous than the disease it selfe? When once Zantippe, the wife of Socrates, in the open street pluckt his cloake from his backe; and some of his acquaintance counselled him to strike her: he answers, you say well; that while we are brawling and sighting together, every one of you may clap us on the backe and cry, hoe, well said, to it Socrates: yea, well done Zantippe, the wisest of the twaine. When Aristippus was asked by one in dirision, where the great high friendship was become, that formerly had bin between him and Estines? he answers, It is a sleepe, but I will goe and awaken it; and did so, least their enemies should make it a matter of rejoycing. When Philip of Macedon was told that the Grecians spake evill words of him, notwithstanding he did them much good, and was withall counselled to chastise them; hee answers, Your counsell is not good; for if they now speake evill of us, having done them good onelyonly; what would they then, if wee should doe them any harme? And at another time, being counselled either to banish or put to death one who had slandered him; hee would doe neither of both, saying, It was not a sufficient cause to condemne him; and for banishing, it was better not to let him stirre out of Macedonia, where all men knew that he lyed; then to send him among strangers, who not knowing him, might admit his slanders for truth: better he speak where we are both knowne, then where we are both unknowne. And this made Chrysippus, when one complained to him, that his friend had reproached him privately: answer, Ah, but chide him not, for then he will doe as much in publike. Neglect will sooner kill an injury, than Revenge. These tongue-squibs or crackers of the braine will die alone, if we revive them not: the best way to have them forgotten by others, is first to forget them our selves. Yea, to contemne an enemy, is better than either to feare him, or answer him. When the Passenger gallops by, as if his fear made him speedy, the Cur followes him with open mouth and swiftnesse; let him turne to the brawling Cur, and he will be more fierce; but let him ride by in a confident neglect, and the Dog will never stir at him, or at least will soone give over and be quiet. To vex other men, is but to prompt them how they should againe vex us. Two earthen pots, floating on the water, with this Inscription, if we knock, we crack: was long agoe made the Emblem of England, and the Low-Countreys. When two friends fall out, if one be not the wiser, they turne love into anger and passion, passion into evill words, words into blowes; and when they are fighting, a third adversary hath a faire advantage to insult over them both. As have you not somtimes seen two neighbours, like two Cocks of the Game peck out one anothers eyes, to make the Lawyers sport; it may be kill them: As while Judah was hot against Israel, and Israel hot against Judah, the King of Syria smote them both; at least Sathan that common and Arch enemy will have us at advantage. For as man delighteth when two Dogs, or two Cocks are a fighting, to encourage and prick them forward to the combate. Even so doth Sathan deale with us; controversies, like a paire of Cudgels, are throwne in by the Devill, and taken up by male-contents, who baste one another while he stands by and laughs. And wee cannot please the Devill better: for as the Master of the Pit oft sets two Cocks to fight together, unto the death of them both; and then after mutuall conquest, suppeth perchance with the sighters bodies: Even so, saith Gregory doth the Devill deale with men. Hee is an enemy that watcheth his time, and while we wound one another, he wounds and wins all our sou…es. Thus, like the Frog and the Mouse in the Fable, while men fight eagerly for a toy, the Kite comes; that Prince and chiefe Fowle, that ruleth in the Aire, and snatcheth away both these great warriors; or like two Emmets in the Mole-bill of this earth, we sight for the mastery; in meane while comes the Robin-red-breast and pickes both up, and so devoures them. But on the other side, by gentlenesse wee may as much pleasure our selves. It is said of Aristides, when he perceived the open scandall which was like to arise, by reason of the contention sprung up between him and Themistocles, that hee besought him mildly after this manner: Sir, wee both are no meane men in this Common-wealth; our dissention will prove no small offence unto others, nor disparagement to our selves; wherefore good Themistocles, let us be at one againe; and if wee will needs strive, let us strive who shall excell other in vertue and love. And we reade of Euclides, that when his Brother (in a variance betweene them) said, I would I might dye if I be not revenged of thee; hee answered againe, nay let me dye for it, if I perswade thee not otherwise before I have done: by which one word hee presently so wonne his brothers heart, that he changed his minde, and they parted friends. And this was Davids way of overcomming, 1 Sam. 24. Hee whose Harpe had wont to quiet Sauls frenzie, now by his kindnesse doth calme his fury, so that now he sheds teares instead of bloud: here was a victory gotten, and no blow stricken. The King of Israel set bread and water before the hoast of the King of Syria, when he might have slaine them, 2 Kings 6. 23. What did he lose by it, or had he cause to repent himselfe? No: hee did thereby so prevent succeeding quarrels, that as the Text saith, The bands of Aram came no more into the Land of Israel; so every wise Christian will doe good to them that doe hurt to him; yea, blesse and pray for them that curse him, as our Saviour adviseth: neither is hee a foole in it, for if grace comes, (and nothing will procure it sooner than prayers and good examples) though before they were evill enemies; now they shall neither be evill, nor enemies. It was a witty answer of Socrates, who replyed, when one askt him, why he tooke such a mans bitter rayling so patiently; It is enough for one to bee angry at a time. For if a wise man contend with a foolish man, saith Salomon, whether he bee angry, or laugh, there is no rest, Prov. 29. 9. Whereas gentle speech appeaseth wrath, and patience bridleth the secret pratlings of mockers, and blunteth the point of their reproach. Had not Gideon, Judg. 8. learned to speake faire aswell as to smite, he had found worke enough from the swords of Josephs sonnes. but his good words are as victorious as his sword; his pacification of friends, better then his execution of enemies, Vers. 2. 3.
As it is not good to slatter, or lye; no more is it in some cases to speake the truth: we know the Asse, and the Hownd in the Fable, were both kild by the Lyon: the one for his flattery in commending the sweetnesse of his breath, the other for his plaine dealing; when he affirmed, it had an ill savour: whereas the Fox by pretending he could not smell, by reason of a cold he had got, saved his life.
Rage is not ingendred, but by the concurrence of cholers, which are easily produced one of another; and borne at an instant. When the stone and the steele meets, the issue ingendred from thence, is fire: whereas the Sword of anger being struck upon the soft pillow of a milde spirit, is broken. The shot of the Cannon hurts not Wooll, and such like yeelding things; but that which is hard, stubborne and resisting. Hee is fuller of passion than reason, that will flame at every vaine tongues puffe. A man that studies revenge, keepes his owne wounds greene and open, which otherwise would beale and doe w…ll. Anger to the soule, is like a coale on the flesh, or garment; cast it off suddenly it doth little harme, but let it lye, it frets deepe. Wherefore saith one, their malice shall sooner cease than my unchanged patience. A small injury shall goe as it comes; a great injury may dine or sup with me, but none at all shall lodge with me; for why should I vexe my selfe, because another hath vexed mee? That were to imitate the foole that would not come out of the Pownd, saying, they had put him in by Law, and he would come out againe by Law: or Ahab, who because hee could not have his will on Naboth, would be revenged on himselfe. As the mad man teares his owne haire, because hee cannot come at his enemies: or little children, who one while forbeare their meat, if you anger them; another time, if you chance to take away but one of their Gugawes, amongst many other toyes which they play withall, will throw away the rest, and then fall a puling and crying out-right. Or the Hedghog, which having laden himselfe with Nuts, and fruites, if but the least Filberd chance to fall off, as he is going to disburden them in his store-house, will …ling downe all the rest, in a peevish humour, and beat the ground for anger; as Pliny writes. Or Dogs, which set upon the stone that hath hurt them with such irefull teeth, that they hurt themselves more than the thrower hurt them; and feele greater smart from themselves, than from their enemy: which makes Archelaus say, it is a great evill, not to be able to suffer evill. And a worthy Divine of ours, I will rather suffer a thousand wrongs than offer one; I will suffer an hundred rather than returne one; I will suffer many ere I will complaine of one; and indeavour to right it by contending: for, saith he, I have ever found, that to strive with my superiour, is furious; with my equals, doubtfull; with my inferiour, for did and base; with any, full of unquietnesse. Satyrus, knowing himselfe cholerick, and in that whirty of minde apt to transgresse, when he but suspected ill language from any, he would stop his eares with wax; lest the sense of it should cause his fierce blood to seeth in his distempered skin. And good reason; if not for wisedomes sake, yet for a mans owne bodily healths sake: for the Emperour Nerva by passionate anger got a Feaver that kild him. And the Emperour Valentinianus dyed by an eruption of blood through anger. And Vincest…us King of Bohemia, in his rage of choler against his Cup-bearer fell into a palsie that killed him. Againe, Caesar, although he could moderate his passions having in that civill garboyle intercepted a Packet of Letters written to Pompey, from his Favourites, brake them not open but burnt them immediately. And Pompey committed those Letters to the fire before he read them, wherein he expected to finde the cause of his griefe. Both upon wise and mature ground, that they might not play booty against themselves in furthering an enemies spite. And certainely if wee well consider it, wee shall meet with vexations enough that we cannot avoide if we would never so faine. We need not (like Cercion in Swidas) wrestle, or (with foolish Pannu…) goe to law with every man wee meet. And yet some (as if they did delight to vex their owne soules like the Ethiopians, who as Diodorus relates lame themselves, if their King be lame) will bee very inquisitive to know what such an one said of them in private: but had they as much wit as jealousie, they would argue thus with themselves; small injuries I would either not know, or not minde, or knowing them I would not know the Author; for by this I may mend my selfe and never malice the person.
I might goe on and shew you that Greece and Asia wore set on fire for an Apple. That not a few have suffered a sword in their bowels, because they would not suffer the lye in their throats. As how few of these Salamanders who are never well, but when they are in the fire of contention, are long lived? The Raven, the Elephant, and the Hart, which have no gall. (Patient Christians) one of them outlive many of the other. And lastly, I might shew that if wee suffer not here with patience, we shall suffer hereafter with griefe; for the wages of anger is judgement, even the judgement of hell fire, Math. 5. 22. But two and twenty yards is enough for a peece.