Solitude Improved by Divine Meditation, Chapter 2
CHAP. II. A ſecond improvement of this truth by way of conviction and for deep humbling.
2. Ʋſe. LET this ſerve for conviction and deep humbling of every one for no better diſcharging this obedience to the Lord of our ſpirits, and that thinking power of them. The natural faculty for thinking was given by God, chiefly for ſpiritual objects, and for acting it ſelf in a ſpiritual way; as the bodily eye is given much more for beholding the light of the Sun, than the light of Candles.
That ſo precious Talent of the thinking power was not lent us by our Lord to embezle and ravel out, but to employ and improve for his beſt advantage; not to be as water ſpilt upon the ground, not to be as a ſpring of pure excellent water, which empties it ſelf into ſome near noiſome ditch, or is ſwallowed up in ſome Bog or Quagmire; O no, it was given us for excellent ends, to act and be in exerciſe, to put forth its ſtrength and vigour upon things moſt excellent and high in themſelves, and moſt ſweet and ſutable to it.
1. Therefore let every perſon look back and be greatly humbled for thoſe times of childhood and youth, and that exceſſive vanity of thoughts, and evils, continually evil imaginations, as Scriptures charge all with, Gen. 6.5. O let us learn much to be humbled, for being ſo long under the total neglect, and daily excluſion of all thought-ſeriouſneſs, not at all complying with, but diſ-reliſhing, but refuſing, all reducing of the thoughts to any due mindings and ponderings of heavenly things.
In that forecited 6. of Geneſis, the Lord when he was threatning the drowning of all the Earth, he ſaw the wickedneſs of man was great, and then among others, when he is making a review and looks back to former times, the times of mens youth, he caſts, into all, the ſum of ſins; the youths ſins of thoughts, the then evils of its imaginations, with the aggravations; reckons not the ways only, and wildneſs of youth diſcovering it ſelf to others, but the evil thoughts of youth, and puniſhes for them with other ſins; I ſay drowned the world for youth ſins, yea youngeſt times thoughts.
Though youth be leaſt conſiderable, and youths thoughts leaſt of all conſidered, yet the holy God puts theſe mites into the black bill, makes the weights of thought ſins to help caſt the Ballance, hangs theſe about the ſinners necks to help drown them in the flood.
O let us then look back to them, be duly humbled for them; humbled for that All of the evil of imaginations, humbled that there was then no conſideration, nothing of this ſo incumbent Duty, this then, even in youth, ſo needful duty: O what a ſad time was that, which did not, would not meditate, that could not, would not ſpare time; time from pleaſures, play, vanities, and follies; time from very toys, trifles, poor petty deſpicable things, yet ſo eagerly minding them, and being ſo taken with them, enſlaved, led, and befooled by them.
Ah when the holy God at the great day before all the world, ſhall bring forth, the eager mindings of youth, the toys, vanities; phanſies, and follies of youth, ſet them all in order, and then ſhew what the things of Heaven and happineſs diſcovered and tendered are, all the ſo rare and moſt ineſtimable things proffer'd in the Goſpel together; I ſay, when all the trifles and vanities of youth, and the bendings of the mind unto them, wholly to them; and all ſpiritual things in the Scriptures, in their natures, and heights of excellency, and the not minding, but refuſing to mind them, ſhall be laid together; O what will be the unſpeakable ſhame and confuſion, ſilence and ſtoppings of the mouths of mindleſs ſinners? O what to ſuch as are ſnatcht away in their youth, in the heights of their minding vanities, and ſo fond refuſals of meditating on ſpiritual things, as not being at leiſure yet, as not thinking it proper and ſeaſonable to be ſerious ſo ſoon.
Ah then if the caſe of youth, mindleſs youth, will be ſo ſad at the great day, when things ſhall appear as they are, when an infinitely wiſe and righteous God will make every ſin appear in its exceeding great ſinfulneſs; how now ſhould it humble all for their youth regardleſneſs, refuſals to allow time for heavenly thoughts; to let precious youth be ſo embezled?
If we mind not ſins of youth, God may ſoon make us to poſſeſs them, Job. 13.26.
If we are truly humbled for them, this may as it were ſpare God a labour, ſave us that heart-ſmart in troubles and terrors, which like gravel in the tender eye, or ſmaller motes there, may occaſion great pain.
Thoſe little things of youth, and which by many are reſolved into nothing, or have a pardon of courſe: Ah theſe ſometimes God blows into the eye of conſcience like clouds of duſt, that we may feel how great a weight of trouble, how hot a Hell the leaſt ſin can bring upon us.
The leaſt arrow in the Quiver of Gods wrath, dipt in the leaſt meaſure of its venom, bred by the leaſt ſin, can wound, torment, and drink up our ſpirits; O therefore ſadly ſometimes, let every one look over the time of youth, which ſo long, for intending vanities, diſ-intended and conſidered not things ſerious and ſpiritual, but put them by: Put them by as meer niceties and impertinencies, yea as very burdens and yokes; but chiefly having been called ſo oft upon, by the Word without, and the holy Spirits ſweet motions, together with the frequent calls of conſcience within.
O the time of youth may for ever humble all, cauſe us to look on it with great ſelf-loathing and heart-breaking, with freſh runnings of the ſpring of ſorrow and ſhame for our follies and frowardneſs in refuſal of returning, and to cry out with the Pſalmiſt, Pſal. 25.7. Lord remember not the ſins of my youth; O give a free and full pardon for that fond time ſo waſted, without conſideration acted upon any ſpiritual concernment, to any purpoſe, but all loſt.