Trouble of the Mind and the Disease of Melancholy, Discourse · Part 3 · Chapter 4
CHAP. IV.
Shewing what dreadful apprehenſions a ſoul has, that is under deſertion; and in ſeveral reſpects how very ſad an doleful its condition is, from the Author's own Experience.
THE next thing I deſign to inſiſt upon is, To ſhew that the time of God's forſaking of a ſoul, is a very dark and mournful time; 'tis not only night, but a weeping, ſtormy night; and it may not be unuſeful to you, who have, it may be, hitherto lived in the beams and chearful light of day, to know what paſſes in this forrowful and doleful night: And in this matter, I will not borrow Information from others, but give you My own Experience.
1. In this night the deſerted ſoul it overwhelmed with continual thoughts of the Holineſs, and Majeſty, and Glory of the Lord; nor does it think of him with any manner of delight, according to that of Aſaph, Pſal. 77.3. I remembred God, and was troubled; I complained, and my ſpirit was overwhelmed. And in how deplorable a Caſe is ſuch a Soul, that cannot think of its God and its Creator, but with grief and ſorrow! That fixes upon nothing in him, but his terrible and ſevere Attributes! In other Caſes, when a Man is diſtreſſed on Earth, and beholds vexation and diſquiet there, he can lift up his eyes towards Heaven, and ſee joy and comfort for him there; but in this woful Caſe, there is neither the light of the Sun, the Moon, or the Stars, for many days; the face of God is hid and covered with a dreadful Cloud, Job 31.23. Deſtruction from God was a terror to me; and becauſe of his highneſs, I could not endure.
Secondly, The deſerted ſoul in this mournful night does look upon God at its enemy; and as intending its hurt and ruin by the ſharpneſs of his diſpenſations; and this makes it to be incapable of receiving any conſolation from the Creatures; for will it ſay to them, Alas, if God be mine enemy, as I apprehend him to be, which of you can be my friend? I have a dreadful ſound of his diſpleaſure in my ears, and which of you can bring me any glad tidings? If his power, his Irreſiſtible power be againſt me, who can keep off the killing-blow! Job 19.6. Know now that God hath overthrown we; and hath compaſſed me with his net; he hath fenced up my way that I cannot paſs, and he hath ſet darkneſs in my paths. And ſo v. 9, 10, 11. and Pſal. 88.7. Thy wrath lyeth hard upon me, and thou haſt afflicted me with all thy waves. If in ſuch deſertion, God were apprehended to be upon a deſign of the future happineſs and welfare of the ſoul, it would bear up with courage, or with hope; but having no ſuch belief, it muſt needs ſink and languiſh. The ſtroke that wounds us in ſuch a caſe, is the more painful, as edged with a ſenſe of wrath. Pſal. 102.9, 10. I have eaten aſhes like bread, and mingled my drink with weeping, becauſe of thine indignation and thy wrath, for thou haſt lifted me up, and caſt me down▪ Thus does the weeping perſon vent his ſorrows. God never gives to his people ſuch a bitter Cup, but he mingles love and mercy with it; but alas; I taſte nothing but gall and wormwood, nothing but miſery and vexation: He is with his people, but he has forſaken me, he has caſt me into a fiery furnace, where I am daily burnt and ſcorcht, and he is not with me there: He is unto me as a Roaring Lion, and who can turn away his powerful wrath! Ruth 1.20. The Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me. I have often heard, that it is a terrible thing to fall into the hands of the Living God, and I now find it to be ſo; all the wrath of men is nothing to his; one frown of his is more intolerable than all their rage and perſecution. Job 16.12, 13, 14. I was at eaſe, but he hath broken me aſunder, he hath alſo taken me by my neck, and ſhaken me to pieces, and ſet me up for his mark, his Archers compaſs me round about; he cleaveth my reins aſunder, and doth not ſpare; he poureth out my gall upon the ground, Job 10.16, 17. Oh what anguiſh, what deſolation is cauſed in the ſoul by ſuch thoughts as theſe! I dare not, ſays the mourning perſon, look up to Heaven, for there I ſee how great a God I have againſt me; I dare not look into his word, for there I ſee all his threats as ſo many barbed arrows to ſtrike me to the heart: I dare not look into the Grave, becauſe thence I am like to have a doleful Reſurrection: And what can a poor Creature do, that apprehends the Almighty to be his enemy? It is a common thing to ſay, why do you ſo lament and mourn? you have many mercies left, many friends that pray for you, and that pity you; Alas! what help is there in all this, it God himſelf be gone! nothing is then lookt upon as a mercy. And as for the prayers of others, will the diſtreſſed perſon ſay, they can do me no good, unleſs I have faith, and I find I have none at all; for that would purifie and cleanſe my heart, and I do nothing elſe but ſin; and God, as he is holy, muſt ſet himſelf againſt me his Enemy.
3ly, In this doleful night, the ſoul hath no evidence at all of its former grace; ſo that in this night, the Sun is not only ſet, but there is not one Star appears; ſuch an one looks upon himſelf as altogether void of the Grace of God; he looks upon all his former duties to have been inſincere or hypocritical; he feels his heart hardned at preſent, and concludes that it was never tender; finds himſelf at preſent liſtleſs and indiſpoſed, and concludes that he never had any true life and motion, and expreſſes his ſorrows after this, or the like manner: I thought I had belong'd to God, but now I find I am none of his: I thought I had been upright, but now I ſee I was miſtaken; the ſtorm is come, and that houſe that I built upon the ſand, is now waſht away; thoſe that are Chriſt's, he will enable to perſevere to the end; but I am fallen from grace; I am an Apoſtate; if I had any ſhare in the Interceſſion of the Great Redeemer, he would not leave me thus ſad and deſolate. I thought that I had been planted in his Vineyard, and brought forth fruit, but now I am cut down as a barren tree: Oh, how greatly have I been deceived, that imagined my ſelf to be an Heir of Heaven, and am now ſeizd with the pangs of Hell! I now ſee that I was never right, never born again, never renewed by the Spirit, never changed from death to life. And Oh what will become of me, that flattered my own ſoul to ruin! that thought my ſelf ſafe when I was not; and well when I was diſeaſed! To come to miſery after I thought ſo long of happineſs is a double miſery: I am like, after all my prayers, my endeavours, and my hopes, to be a Reprobate, and a caſt-away. And ſuch a ſoul concludes it ſelf to be in a condition much more dangerous than they are, that never named the name of Chriſt, nor ever pretended to Religion, becauſe it reckons their miſery will be much more tollerable than its own; it judges it ſelf to be an Hypocrite, and then all the threats that are made againſt ſuch, do every moment overwhelm it with inexpreſſible confuſion. Thus the Graces of the Spirit, and the former fruits of holineſs, are not diſcerned in this ſad and mournful night.
Fourthly, During this ſadneſs, the ſoul cannot thinly of Chriſt himſelf with any comfort. For thus it argues; He will be a Saviour to none but thoſe that believe; I have no faith, and therefore he will be no Saviour to me; he that is to his Servants as the Lamb of God, will be to me as the Lion of the Tribe of Judah; he that deals gently with them, will tear me to pieces. I have heard of his ſufferings and his death; but if his blood has not cleanſed and purified me, I am like to periſh for all that. I heard his voice, and I diſobeyed it; I heard his Goſpel, and did not improve it, and now even the glad tidings of Salvation are not ſo to me: I did not know in the long day that I had, the things that belong'd unto my peace, and now they are hid from mine eyes. Now I have to deal with the great and the dreadful God himſelf, and I have none to plead my cauſe. Oh how can I reſiſt his power, or bear his wrath! Chriſt indeed called me, but I did not open to him, and now he calls no more; he ſeems to be angry and enraged againſt me for my diſobedience; and tho I have cried ſometimes, Have mercy on me, thou Son of David! he paſſes away, and does not regard my cryes. And, O what ſhall I do when he comes in the Clouds of Heaven, when I am to ſtand at his Bar, and to be puniſhed as an unbeliever! To others, that will be a day of Refreſhment; but what will it be to me! the thoughts of it are now amazing! And thus by a ſenſe of unbelief the deſerted ſoul is plunged in the waves, and ſees no way of eſcape; and by this Unbelief it thinks of God as abſolutely conſidered, and the thoughts of him are as terrible as if there were no Mediator; and it is continually ſaying, I have all my ſins to anſwer for, and have none to undertake for me; I am condemned, and have none to procure a pardon and ſalvation for me.
Fifthly, In this Night the ſoul is full of terror; and how can it be otherwiſe, when every thought of God, and of Chriſt, overwhelms it! Job 6.4. For the arrows of the Almighty are within me, the poyſon whereof drinketh up my ſpirit; the terrors of God do ſet themſelves in array againſt me. Such arrows that are ſhot by an Almighty arm, with a great power and force, they muſt needs, being ſo directed, pierce very deep; deep and painful muſt the wounds be that a God makes; and then they are poyſoned arrows too, that being dipt in his wrath, inflame the wounds they make, and put the diſtreſſed perſon into pain and anguiſh inexpreſſible. Night is a time of terror, eſpecially in commotions, uproars, and the like miſchiefs, Pſal. 91.5. and in this night it is much more ſo, when a mans own Conſcience diſcharges a thouſand accuſations againſt him for his guilt; for then every ſin gives a blow; and altogether being ſet in array, make a formidable force; and when God ſets on peculiar impreſſions of his wrath, and it falls upon the naked ſoul with its ſcorching burning drops, there is not then one quiet thought, nor one eaſie moment, all is amazement, confuſion and wo. Lam. 3.3. Surely againſt me is he turned, he turneth his hand againſt me all the day. A perſon that is thus diſtreſs'd, ſits and muſes on his miſery, and would gladly find ſomething that might be comfortable, but he cannot; what he firſt thinks of, is tormenting; he changes that uneaſie thought for another, and that is as tormenting as the firſt; there is a circulation of flaming diſquiet thoughts, and ſuch a perſon dwells as in a nery Furnace, or as in a thicket of briers, which way ſoever he turns himſelf, he is pained and wounded; all the terrible places of Scripture that are made againſt the wicked, do continually preſent themſelves to his conſideration, and he thinks that he ſhall moſt certainly have their portion; every thing in nature that is frightful, frights him, as ſtill believing God to be againſt him; from all the terrible things imaginable he fetches ſomething that does ſtill more afflict him; and thus he will be imagining: Suppoſe I were to be ſawn aſunder, to be burnt, to be flea'd alive, or to be torn to pieces; Oh what a ſad thing would that be! and yet I am in a caſe worſe than all this, for I am now continually racked with guilt, and am like to be in Hell for ever. The terrors of the Lord we may ſeel indeed, but we cannot expreſs them, they are ſo very terrible; they wound our moſt ſenſible and tender part; they cauſe our very ſouls to pine and languiſh away; they fix our minds to the contemplation of every thing that is ſad and doleful; they fill us with confuſion; and Heman ſays, Pſ. 88.15. they are terrors that compaſs us round about, they ſeize upon every faculty, and diſtreſs us in every part; to have God againſt us, his holineſs to dazle us, his Power to overthrow us, his Law to condemn us, our Conſciences to accuſe us, is the ſum of terrors!
Sixthly, Fear is another occaſion of ſorrow, and the night is uſually a time of horror; we are apt then to be impoſed upon with falſe, as well as with real dangers. We can think of nothing but out miſery; and the continual unavoidable thinking of it, makes us more miſerable, Job 13.21. theſe fears are as ſo many Fetters from which we cannot fly; and when we think to ſhake them off, we put our ſelves to more pain. If I ſay I will forget my complaints, I will leave off my heavineſs, and comfort my ſelf, I am afraid of all my ſorrows; I know that thou wilt not hold me innocent, Job 9.27, 28. we are frighted with the Greatneſs and Majeſty of God, with the Glory of his Being, and the Thunder of his Power: We are frighted with the view of our innumerable ſins, and with the dangers that attend them; the thoughts of Heaven fright us, becauſe we think we have loſt that bleſſed place; and the thoughts of Hell are no leſs frightful, becauſe we think we ſhall ſoon be there; the thoughts of life are frightful, becauſe tis with anguiſh and horror that we live; nor can we bear the thoughts of death, becauſe we dare not die.
Seventhly, 'Tis a night of weeping to deſerted ſouls, becauſe they find no heart to pray, and no life in prayer; they fall upon their knees, and cover the Altar of the Lord with tears, but he ſeems not to regard them; they beg, and he gives them no relief; they cry and he does not anſwer; and this fills them with ſhame and grief, Lam. 3.7, 8. the thoughts of ſuch poor people are in a continual hurry, and ſo are very full of wandrings in the performance of their duty: Grief, by ſaddening the ſpirits, deſtroys the freedom of our ſpeech; for joy is the mother of Eloquence and fluency; and when they would move up towards Heaven, this ſorrow damps their vigor, and makes them that they cannot fly; and finding they are ſtill perplex'd even after prayer, and ſtill as uncomfortable as before, they are apt to throw it off, and ſay, It is vain to pray; as Saul, 1 Sam. 28.15. God is departed from me, and anſwers me no more. And ſorrow is naturally a very dull and ſluggiſh thing; a man has no heart to go about any work when he is very ſad; and this faintneſs occaſions a new trouble; we are vext when we do not pray; and when we would, we cannot. Sorrows damp our faith, our love, and our hope, and ſo ſpoil our duties; for without theſe, they are without life, and without acceptance; and ſometimes our grief is ſo violent, that it finds no vent, it ſtrangles us, and we are overcome. I am ſo troubled, that I cannot ſpeak, Pſal. 77.4. It is with us in our deſertions as with a man that gets a ſlight hurt, at firſt he walks up and down, but not looking betimes to prevent a growing miſchief, the neglected wound begins to feſter, or to gangrene, and brings him to greater pain and loſs; ſo it is with us many times in our Spiritual ſadneſs; when we are firſt troubled, we pray and pour out our ſouls before the Lord; but afterwards the waters of our grief drown our crys, and we are ſo overwhelmed, that if we might have all the world we cannot pray, or at leaſt we can find no enlargement, no life, no pleaſure in our prayers; and God himſelf ſeems to take no delight in them, and that makes us more ſad. Pſal. 22.1.
Eighthly, Such have no patience wherewith to bear their evils; Oh who is he that can bear the wrath of God! one thought of him as a reconciled Father, would ſweeten the moſt heavy Croſs; but one view of him as an enemy, cauſes all our ſtrength to depart, and melts our very ſouls. In bodily evils the mind lends its aſſiſtance, and furniſhes the natural ſpirits with courage; but when its ſelf is weakned and troubled, what is it able to do? the wounded ſoul is moſt commonly fretful and impatient; the ſight of Heaven inſpires our breaſts with vital heat, and makes us quiet and ſubmiſſive under every diſpenſation; but the daily ſight and fear of Hell, fills us with tumult and diſorder; the language of deſerted people for the moſt part is in groans, and in their prayers they chatter as a Crame, or a Swallow, or mourn as a Dove, Iſa. 38.14. Job 13.20, 21.
Ninthly, They uſually ſee no proſpect of relief or deliverance, and that encreaſes the ſorrows of their doleful Night; they are covered in the deep pit, and ſee no way to fly from it, Job 9.27, 28. they are wounded, and carry their wounds with them where they go; they are continually fixing their mournful eyes upon deſtruction and the Grave, Job 7.7, 8. they have indeed, now and then, ſome intermiſſions, but they are like the ſmall breathings and refreſhments of a perſon that is newly taken off the Rack, to be carried to the Rack again. The Tears of theſe poor deſerted people, are not like the Tears of Mary in the Garden; for as ſoon as ſhe began to weep, ſhe beheld the Lord; He quickly came to her help, and changed her Sorrows into Conſolations; and his ſweet Voice did in a moment run through all the powers of her ſoul, and made her heart to leap with Joy, and ſcattered light upon it: But in this caſe he ſuffers his Servants to be toſt for a long and doleful night, ere he be pleaſed to ſpeak, and to calm the ſtorms; ſo that they are as perſons ſtraitly beſieged, and have no relief at hand; as perſons athirſt, and have no Water; hungry, and have no Bread. Pſal. 113.4. I looked on my right hand, and beheld, but there was no man that would know me, refuge failed me.
Tenthly, This Night of weeping is the more ſorrowful, becauſe it is the time of Satan's Cruelty. When our Spirits are broken with long and painful afflictions, then this Cowardly Spirit ſets upon us; he knows that he can eaſily perplex us, when we are already thrown upon the Ground. When the Sun ſets, then the Beaſts of the Field creep abroad; When God is departed, then the Devil comes. He comes and torments us with innumerable fears; comes and Triumphs over us, inſults, and ſays, Where is now your God? What think you now of Sin? What is now become of all your Hearing, your Reading, and your many Prayers? You thought to have eſcaped my Power, and now I have you within my reach; now remember that at ſuch or ſuch a time you ſinned, and therefore God has forſaken you; you weep, and your Tears are juſt; for you are miſerable, and are like to be with me for ever. He makes uſe of our ſore Afflictions, to repreſent God to us as Tyrannical, and as one that will certainly deſtroy us; and it is our grief, and our miſery, that we have ſo little in our deſertions to anſwer to him. When we really believe that God is departed from us, What can we ſay? How does this Roaring Lion moſt cruelly moleſt us, when our Glory and our Strength is gone! though at other ſeaſons we can oppoſe his malice, and confidently ſay, The Lord, that hath choſen Jeruſalem, rebuke thee. He is, indeed, a knowing and a ſubtile Spirit; he knows our weakneſs, ſees our trouble, and urges even the very Scriptures and Providences of God upon us to our diſadvantage, and that with a marvellous importunity and diligence: He ſhoots at us with fiery Darts, that are extreamly painful, and comes to ſhoot them when we are under a ſenſe of God's diſpleaſure; which is like thruſting of a Red Iron into a Wound that is already very ſore. It pleaſes the Devil to hear us groan, and to ſee us ſad; and when we are already preſſed down with our Evils, he will be ſure to throw upon us more weight; our Groans are his Muſick; and when we wallow in Aſhes, drown our ſelves in Tears, and ſpread our Hands for help, and roar till our Throat is dry, he gluts his cruel heart with looking on our woes; it is the pleaſanteſt ſight to him, to ſee God hiding himſelf from his Child, and that Child broken with fears, torn in pieces with Griefs, made a Brother to Dragons, a Companion to Owls, under reſtleſs Anxieties, perpetual Lamentations, feeble, and ſore broken, their Tongue cleaving to their Jaws, their Bowels boyling, their Bones burnt with heat, and their fleſh conſumed*Dr. Gilpin on Satans Temptations, Part 2. p. 281.; He ſets upon us after we have been long troubled, and weary with our March in the doleful Night: And which is the ſorrow of our ſorrows, God may for a long while leave us in his hands; and by his uſage of Job, we know what his temper is. Luke 22.31. 'Tis the hour and the power of darkneſs.
Eleventhly, Sometimes this Sorrow is mixed with deep Deſpair: It is a Tempeſtuous and Stormy Night. And as Paul ſaid in another caſe, All hope of their being ſaved is taken away. I ſhall ſurely periſh, ſaith the mourning ſoul; I am damned, I am loſt for ever; I am already as in Hell, under unexpreſſible, inſupportable pains; and amazing fears; the Lord will be favourable no more, he hath ſhut up his Bowels, and his Tender Mercies; he is gone, he is gone from me, and he is for ever gone. No more ſhall I call him Father; no more ſhall I behold his ſhining face; no more ſhall I hear his kind and loving Voice, he is my Judge and my Enemy, and I am afraid he will be ſo for ever. He hath caſt me off, he hath forſaken me; he hath condemned me, and I am loſt for ever: I am now like to have my poor Soul gathered with Sinners and with Bloody Men; I am now never like to ſee that Heaven where I once hoped to go; I ſee nothing but ruin, nothing but deſolation, nothing but blackneſs of darkneſs; and theſe unbelieving, deſpairing Concluſions, produce hard and ſtrange thoughts of God, and an enmity to him in our minds.
Twelſthly, Looking upon their preſent troubles as an Introduction to more, and that theſe are but the beginning of ſorrows. Iſa. 38.13. I reckoned till morning, that as a Lion ſo will he break all my bones; from day even to night wilt thou make an end of me. How often do we hear ſuch ſaying, Oh! what will become of me, ſhould I dye in ſuch a ſtate as I now am in! in ſuch horror and amazement! where will my guilty ſoul then go! Alas! I am no way prepared to give up my accounts, and yet am like every moment to be called away; If I cannot bear theſe Pains, and this Wrath, what ſhall I do to bear an Eternal Hell! If I tremble ſo now, what ſhall I do when the blow is given, and the final Sentence paſt! I have but one change to make, and it is like to be a ſad and woful change, God knows! I dare neither live nor dye! Oh! what, ſhall I do! whither ſhall I go? Stay I muſt not, and depart I dare not; I am now ſorely tormented, and muſt I be for ever and for ever ſo, and worſe too! I now ſee that the Gate is ſtrait, and the way is narrow, and that there will be few indeed that will be ſaved. The ſhadows of the Evening are ſtretched out upon me, and what ſhall I do if it prove an Eternal night? For as it is the glory of Faith, to ſhew us future things, as if actually preſent; and to give us joy from them ſo conſidered: So it is the torment of deſpair, to make poor diſtreſſed Souls believe they are even as in Hell, whileſt they are on Earth; and that they are actually ſcorched with that wrath that is to come in greater meaſures.
Thirteenthly, From all theſe follow ſtrange diſcourſes and expreſſions of ſorrow; they are forced to complain, to cry out, and to weep bitterly, Job 7.11. Therefore I will not refrain my mouth, I will ſpeak in the anguiſh of my ſpirit, I will complain in the bitterneſs of my ſoul. They ſpeak without any manner of concern or fear, things that both vex themſelves, and make others tremble; they ſcarce care what they ſay of God or of themſelves. My ſoul is weary of my life, I will leave my complaint upon my ſelf; I will ſpeak in the bitterneſs of my ſoul, Job 10.1, 3. Nay they frequently proceed to wiſh they had never been born, knowing it is better not to be, than to be miſerable. Job 3. Job 10.16, 17, 18. Nay, they may proceed ſo far, as to wiſh even to be deſtroyed that they may know the worſt: Such is the ſorrow of their hearts, and ſo violent, Job 6.26. Do ye imagine to reprove words, and to reprove the ſpeeches of one that is deſperate, which are as wind! And there are two things that make their ſorrows more ſorrowful:
1. As comparing their ſtate with that of others.
2. As with their own former ſtate.
1. It makes them more ſad when they conſider the caſe of others; with what peace and joy they live, with what hope and comfort, whileſt they are drowned in ſorrows. Others, ſays the deſerted Soul, can ſing the Praiſes of God with delight, whileſt I am overwhelmed, and my Harp is hung upon the Willows; others can go into the ſolemn Aſſemblies, and hear his Word, but I am confined in my thick darkneſs, and dare not go thither; others have the hope of Heaven, and I have the dayly fear of Hell; I am like to ſee others enter into Glory, and my ſelf ſhut out; Oh! what have my ſins done! If I had not greatly ſinned, I might have had as much quietneſs, and comfort, and peace as they; and I that am now cut down for my unfruitfulneſs might have been ſerving God with as much chearfulneſs, and light, and hope as they do.
2. When the deſerted ſoul compares its preſent with its former ſtate. To a perſon in miſery, it is a great increaſe of miſery to have been once happy: It was to David an occaſion of new Tears, when he remembred his former Joys, Pſal. 42.3, 4. Time was, ſays the poor Soul, when I thought of God with comfort, and when I thought of him as my own God; and to loſe a God that I once enjoyed, is the Loſs of all my Loſſes; and of all my Terrors the moſt Terrible. Time was, when I could go and pray to him, and eaſe my ſelf in Prayer; but now I have no boldneſs, no hope, no ſucceſs in Prayer, I cannot call him my Father any more. Time was, when I could read the Bible, and treaſure up the Promiſes, and ſurvey the Land of Canaan as my own inheritance; but now I dare not look into the Word, leſt I read my own Condemnation there. The Sabbath was formerly to me as one of the days of Heaven; but now it is alſo, as well as the reſt, a ſad and a mournful day. I formerly rejoyced in the name of Chriſt, I ſat under his ſhadow, Cant. 8.10. I was in his eyes as one that found favour; but now my ſoul is like the deſerts of Arabia, I am ſcorched with burning heat. From how great an height have I fallen! How fair was I once for Heaven, and for Salvation, and now am like to come ſhort of it! I was once flouriſhing in the Courts of the Lord, and now all my Fruit is blaſted and withered away; his dew laid all night upon my branches; but now I am like the Mountains of Gilboa, no Rain falls upon me. Had I never heard of Heaven, I could not have been ſo miſerable as I now am; Had I never known God, the loſs of him had not been ſo terrible as now it is like to be. Job 29.2, 3. Oh! that I were as in months paſt, as in the days when God preſerved me; When his Candle ſhined upon my head, and when by his light I walked through darkneſs! Theſe are ſome of the ſorrows that deſerted Souls often meet withal; and indeed, but a ſmall part of what they feel in this dark and ſtormy night. Before I proceed any further, I will anſwer two Objections, for I foreſee, that againſt what I have ſaid, ſome may object.