Trouble of the Mind and the Disease of Melancholy, Discourse · Part 2 · Chapter 7
CHAP. VII.
Of ſeveral other ways whereby a ſenſe of Gods favour may be preſerved in our ſouls; and how we may certainly know that we are in that Happy ſtate.
V. IF you have this Favour of God, you will deſire the continuance of it above all other things; and this will be both an evidence of your preſent ſincerity, and a means to convey to you a more pleaſant ſenſe of this favour. In all outward actions, as Prayer, Hearing, Giving to the Poor, and the like, there may be a very great reſemblance between a true Chriſtian and an Hypocrite; but ſpiritual deſires being the immediate off-ſpring of the ſoul, are not liable to ſo many cheats; and your deſires after God will be very ſtrong and earneſt, and produce powerful and ſenſible effects, for they will be the fruit of a lively Faith, and of an enlightned Underſtanding that ſees the value of a God. And this will render more ſtrong the motions of your Souls; for ignorance of him is the Mother of all feeble and languiſhing Deſires. Your breathings after him will be like Hunger and Thirſt, which are very uneaſy to Nature, and give us the moſt raging and eager Appetites, and make us not well ſatisfied till they meet with their proper Gratifications. Pſal. 42.1, 2. As the heart panteth after the water-brooks: ſo panteth my ſoul after thee, O God. My ſoul thirſteth for God, for the living God: when ſhall I come and appear before him? Even as that poor Creature, when 'tis purſued with Hunters, and greatly heated with its flight, longs to be refreſht with the cool Streams of Water, ſo will you, when haraſſed with the Temptations of the Devil, and his malicious and moſt cruel Suggeſtions, fly with haſte to the Embraces and Arms of God, longing and panting after him; nay, the warmth of your deſires may be ſo great, as that you will, even as it were, melt away in flaming Zeal. Pſalm 84.2. My ſoul longeth, yea, even fainteth for the courts of the Lord: my heart and my fleſh crieth out for the living God. And Pſal. 119.20. My ſoul breaketh for the longing it hath to thy commandments. Hope deferred makes the heart ſick. Prov. 13.12. An eager deſire of abſent amiable Good, raiſes an agreeable Senſation, and ſomewhat of Diſorder in the Natural Spirits; they are heated and ſtirred up with more vigour through the vehemence with which they move, tho this does very much abate their ſtrength, and occaſion that which we call fainting. Such is the Sympathy that the Soul hath with its deareſt Body, that when the Soul meets with an Object ſuitable, it is filled with warm Affections, and fills the Body either with ſadder, or more chearful Spirits, as it finds reaſons of Sadneſs or of Joy. Tho theſe deſires of holy Men after God, do not always burn with an equal Flame; for in Deſertions, in ſome very perplexing Difficulty, or in great bodily Indiſpoſition and Sickneſs, they are damped, and cannot uſually be ſo quick, ſo chearful, and ſo ſenſible as at other times, tho even then they may be very ſincere and acceptable; for in ſo gloomy a time, one Groan that comes from an humble heart may go up to God in as grateful a manner, as many long Prayers at another ſeaſon. And in your deſires after his Favour, you will have regard to theſe two things.
1. You will remember what it was that once heightned your deſires, and endeavour by the ſame means to quicken them when they begin to languiſh. You will often conſider what perfection in God it was, whether his Goodneſs, his Mercy, his Truth, his unchangeable Faithfulneſs, or the like; or what promiſe in the Scripture, or what Act of Providence towards you, it was that warmed your hearts. And apply your ſelves again to the ſame profitable methods; you will often recollect what paſſages they were in Sermons that you heard, or in the good Books that you read, that gave you the firſt amiable Senſe of God.
2. You will carefully obſerve what it is that cools and damps your deſires. What Paſſion, what worldly Pleaſure, what vain Company, what fooliſh Hopes, what tormenting Cares, what enſlaving Fears; and avoid all theſe as much as in you lies. You will avoid thoſe Snares that intangled you, thoſe Tentations that have clipt your Wings, and made you, when you were ſoaring aloft, to fall to this Earth again. Whatever ſecret Sin it was that weakned your holy Breathing after God, or what omiſſion of Duty it was that eſtranged him from you, and immediately begin to mortifie that Sin, and to ſet upon that Duty; tho when we have done all we can, there will be a vaſt difference between what we are, and what we ought to be; between our longing, and the moſt Glorious Object after which we are to long. But do we find no more any pleaſure in our old Luſts? Do we find our Hearts dead to this deceitful World, and to thoſe Objects that once we called Amiable, and to which we ſacrificed our time, our endeavours, our morning and our evening Thoughts? Do the things that heretofore we moſt admired, now ſeem leſs elegible? Does all that we called beautiful, ſeem deformed when compared with God himſelf? Can every one of us ſincerely ſay to our moſt beloved Sins, and to the enjoyments of this World, I once indeed over-admired you, but I will never do ſo again for ever. I bid you all farwell, never pretend to a ſhare in my Affections, for I have now found a better good, I have long purſued you to no purpoſe; now in finding God, I have found a ſure, a ſmooth, and a near way to reſt: you have cheated me with vain Deluſions too oft, but you ſhall cheat me no more; for it is to God that I offer up my heart, tho with grief that I loved him no ſooner, when he is ſo infinitely good and amiable.
VI. If you have this favour of God to be Life to you at preſent, then you have felt by experience, what a miſerable thing it is to be without him. Tho as there is a wonderful variety in the Works of God in Nature, ſo there is no leſs in thoſe of Grace. His Favour is not communicated in all reſpects the ſame way; tho all are redeemed by the Blood of the ſame Redeemer, yet ſome ſhall groan under the painful Senſe of their Chains and Captivity much longer than others. In ſome, the New Birth is produced by his gentle Hand in a little time, and others have it not till after many dreadful Pangs and Agonies. Some get to Heaven with much fewer Conflicts than others do, that are travelling to the ſame place. This Variety is admirable and very wiſe, tho we diſcern not the reaſons of it. But yet all that are bleſſed with the Favour of God, cannot without aſtoniſhment ſurvey the hideous Darkneſs, and the woful Danger in which they lay before this glorious Sun was pleaſed to ſhine. Oh! what would have become of me for ever, ſaith ſuch an one, if he had ſuffered me to follow my own Choice, and to take my own Courſe, and to have my own Deſires, when I was running even to the Gates of Hell. I now indeed ſee my ſad eſtate as it then was; but, oh! what would have become of me, had he ſuffered me to continue in my fatal Slumbers on the edge of Ruin? If I had dreamed on, and had not awaked before the dreadful blow of Death, where would then my lot have been? How many thouſand Miſeries was I under, and did not perceive my Bondage, nor feel my Miſery? Death was creeping on me, Hell was gaping to receive me, the Law curſt me, the Devil led me Captive, and I knew it not, and in this woful poſture did he find me; I was polluted, and caſt out, and helpleſs, and in my Blood, and then he ſaid unto me, Live, Ezek. 16. and made the time of my Danger, and my Provocation, to be a time of Love. So great a Change, and ſo happy a Revolution deſerves indeed a frequent and thankful Remembrance. It does give a mighty pleaſure to the Soul to find it ſelf ſafe, when it was even in the Jaws of the roaring Lyon ready to be torn in pieces, when the Arm of the Almighty reſcued the endangered, and the trembling Prey. It is not with a greater pleaſure that a ſick Man, who has been long confined with inexpreſſible Pain, and at the very door of the Grave, thinks of his preſent Health and Life. A Mariner that hath eſcaped Shipwrack, the Dangers of the Sea, and upon a Plank, or broken piece of the Ship, with great hardſhip and difficulty is got to Land, does not with a greater Calmneſs look upon the Waves, and that Sea that had like to have ſwallowed him up, then ſuch a Sinner looks upon his former Miſeries, and his preſent Priviledge; his former Enmity to God, and his preſent Reconciliation with him. 2. It may be you have experienced, that nothing in all the World is ſo very terrible as his withdrawing from you. Have you not found it to be a Puniſhment much greater than bodily Pain, or Sickneſs, or any Temporal Calamity? That the loſs of your deareſt Friend, your kindeſt and moſt comfortable Relation, was much more tolerable than ſuch a loſs as this: to loſe the ſenſe of his Favour after you once enjoyed it, has not this loſs been to you, even as Hell it ſelf; or like the departure of Adam out of Paradiſe, after he had once beheld the Beauties, and taſted the Pleaſure of that amiable Place? What Fear, what Anxiety, and what Conſternation did ſeize upon him, when he was to be kept from it, never more to ſee the Tree of Life, never more to walk in that moſt delightful Garden, nor to ſee Angels viſiting his ſweet Habitation, as they once uſed to do? And have you not been poſſeſſed with as great a fear, when you have thought that God for your Iniquities was turned your Enemy! I could bear any other Affliction, ſays the poor deſerted Soul; but to be forſaken of God, is ſo terrible, that I cannot bear it. How can I ſee Frowns in his Face, and live? I have had many Diſappointments, and Vexations, and Croſſes, and in all theſe I could lift up my Head, and hope; but now I am deſtroyed on every ſide, and my hope is gone. Heretofore, when the World had uſed me ill, I could go to the Throne of Grace, and my heavenly Father would give my weary Soul pleaſant entertainment, and ſpeak comfortably to me; but now he does not viſit and refreſh me as he uſed to do; and his bleſſed Face that I once ſaw with peace, is now hid and covered with a Cloud. I have my former worldly Comforts, my Friends, and my Eſtate; but alas, my God is gone, and what do theſe avail! I once read his Word with Joy, and now it fills me with Gall and Wormwood. I once ſat under his Shadow with great delight, and his Fruit was pleaſant to my taſte; but now I am athirſt, and have nothing wherewith to quench my thirſt. I am now ſcorcht with heat, and have no Shelter, no cool ſhady Retirement where I may fly for eaſe. Job 23.8, 9. Behold I go forward, but he is not there; and backward, but I cannot perceive him; on the left hand, where he doth work, but I cannot behold him: he doth hide himſelf on the right hand that I cannot ſee him. You will moſt earneſtly pray againſt ſo ſad a ſtate as this is, if you have ever experienced the Favour of God to be your Life. Oh Lord! hide not thy ſelf from my poor Soul; whatever elſe I looſe, let me not loſe thee and thy Love. Do not hold me for thine Enemy, nor let thy Terrors fall upon me, do not caſt me off, O my Father, tho I have been very diſobedient. And if God depart, your mourning for his abſence will be like the mourning of a Mother for the death of an only Son, or like the ſadneſs of ſo many poor Children that bewail a loſt Father; they are left deſtitute, and can do nothing without his advice and help. You will follow your God with Tears and Supplications, and ſay with Chriſt in great agony, but with great Faith, My God, my God, why haſt thou forſaken me! Why doſt thou forget the Work of thine own hands? Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak; why doſt thou leave me in this doleful Wilderneſs where no Water is, to be a prey to Satan and mine own Fears? I have indeed wandered about, ſeeking reſt, and find none; put out thy loving hand, and guide me to thy ſelf. I have indeed deſerv'd this uſage, for thou waſt with me, and I did not value thy preſence; thou didſt call, but I did not obey thy voice; thou didſt ſtand at my Door, but I ſhut thee out; wo, wo unto me that I have ſinned; wo unto me, that I did not improve thy Grace, thy Preſence, and thy Love, as I ſhould have done. But tho I have been a Prodigal, thou art a Father ſtill; and tho I have not done as becomes a Child, yet I will return to thee, becauſe thou wilt not caſt off the comfortable Name of a Father. Thus, I ſay, do thoſe that have had experience of God's favour mourn for his abſence? Their Spirits are like the tender Flowers that hang their heads when the Sun is ſet, and they walk more diſconſolately than any Subject can be ſuppoſed to do: who after having once ſhared in the peculiar Graces of his Prince, ſees him at length, becauſe of his Crimes, to look upon him with a ſevere, or a leſs ſavourable eye.
VII. If you enjoy the Favour of God, you will have a great value for his Word, for the Spirit, and the Blood of Chriſt: For his Word, as diſcovering to you this God; and perſuading you by many comfortable Promiſes and Entreaties to accept of him; and not only ſo, but conveying to you ſaving light and knowledge, with its great and powerful efficacy. You will love the Word, becauſe of the many Supports and Conſolations which you have received from it; you will love it as the Rule of your Duty, and all its Precepts will be dear to you, as conveying to you life and ſtrength: you will love it ſo, as to read it often, ſo as to meditate upon it, and to lay it up in your hearts: you will love it as the Inſtrument of your Regeneration; and rejoice in it not only for a ſeaſon, but for ever. You will value and obey the Spirit that ſets home revealed truths upon your hearts; and when you were deſtitute of this life, convinced you of your miſerable ſtate, and reſtored vigor and motion to thoſe Faculties of yours that were ſtupified and benumbed; chaſing away their ancient darkneſs, and guiding them to their proper Objects; and cauſing thoſe Objects ſo diſcovered, to produce glorious effects in your once barren Souls. You will alſo prize all the Ordinances of God, in which you may have communion with him; as Prayer, Hearing, Meditation, and the like; and it will leave a ſenſible grief upon your minds, when you miſs of theſe Ordinances by your own fault.
VIII. You will be very humble and heavenly minded. His Favour fills all his Servants with the loweſt, and moſt ſelf-abaſing thoughts; you will never ſpeak of him, but in terms full of reſpect; never pray to him, but with great reverence and veneration: the nearer acceſs you have to him, the more will you diſcern of his Infinite Holineſs and Purity, and how vile you are when compared with him: you will wonder at his Condeſcentions; and caſt down your Crowns before the Throne; and imitate his humble Language in 2 Sam. 9.7, 8. when David told Mephiboſheth, Thou ſhalt eat bread at my Table continually; he bowed himſelf, and ſaid, What if thy ſervant, that thou ſhouldſt look upon ſuch a dead dog as I am! This will cauſe you to admire the diſtinguiſhing Grace of God that is vouchſafed to you, more than to many others in the World; great numbers whereof are buried in Ignorance, or open Idolatry, and the reſt in Profaneneſs or Hypocriſy; many, it may be, are paſſed by in the ſame Families where you live; and whilſt you are alive, your next Neighbour, perhaps, is dead: And then, if you have obtained this Favour, you will be heavenly minded; your Treaſure, and your Hearts, will be above; you will taſte and reliſh ſpiritual and divine things; and never be more pleaſed, than when you are leaſt earthly and carnal: and this holy temper will be your comfort and ſecurity againſt the Temptations of Satan, and the Evils of this lower World, as thoſe Birds that ſoar aloft are out of the danger of Guns, and the Snare of the Fowler, who catches thoſe that fly nearer to the ground.
IX. You may then know that you have the Favour of God, if you are induſtrious and zealous in the performance of all holy Duties: If you perform them not only from the force of awakening convictions, but from love and delight; if you refuſe no ſervice that may glorify him, though it ſeem to thwart your worldly Intereſt, and to be painful to the Fleſh; and it is impoſſible but to find a very calm and chearful progreſs in your obedience, when you know that God accepts what you do. As it is a mighty encouragement to the labour of a Servant, when he ſees that his Maſter is very well pleaſed with his work: Darkneſs, you know, with its many Inconveniences, does greatly put a ſtop to diligence, which yet is quickned and excited by the return of Light. So if God's Countenance ſhine upon you, it will make you not only to walk uprightly, but even to run the way of his Commandments with enlarged hearts; Pſal. 119. and you will aſſociate with ſuch as are ſerious, holy Perſons; for the living do not uſe to take pleaſure in being among the dead.
X. And Laſtly, If this Favour of God be your Life, it will make you patiently to long for Heaven. This Favour will be ſweeter to your taſte than honey, or the honey-comb: it will yield a more delightful reliſh to your renewed Appetite, than all the Joys of this World: the little drops that now and then refreſh your hearts, will cauſe you to pant for thoſe Rivers of Pleaſures that are at his Right-hand for evermore. Are you weary of ſinning? weary of your imperfect Faith, and Hope, and Love? Does the proſpect that you have of God at this diſtance, render him ſo amiable to your Souls, that you would fain be with him where he is? Are you ſo ſenſible of the evil of your Sin, that you would fain be in that place where you ſhall ſin no more for ever? where your panting Soul ſhall have all its longings turned into an eternal Complacence and Delight? You will often lift up to Heaven your longing eyes, and ſend thither many a ſervent wiſh; ſaying with David, Oh! when ſhall I come and appear before God! Pſal. 42.2. When will it be that I ſhall ſee his glorious Face, and feel beyond all doubt that I am loved of him, and that I love him better than I now do! where the joys of hope ſhall be turned into fruition, and when that which I have now but in the promiſe, I ſhall have in the ſweeteſt and moſt comfortable poſſeſſion! When ſhall I be near his Throne, and ſee that glorious Majeſty that I have adored! When ſhall I ſee that Face, all ſerene, and have no black or mournful Cloud to interpoſe between my God and me for ever! Oh that I might join in the Hallelujahs of the Bleſſed! Oh that I were in that Land of eternal Light and Joy, and in that agreeable Society of Holy Souls, who have already ſhot the gulph, and reſt from all their labours, for I am weary with beholding Vanity. Theſe, and ſuch like, will be the motions of an holy Soul; for its warfare with Sin, the World, and the Devil, is ſo painful, that if cannot but deſire to be releas'd. Its Ignorance is ſo great, that it cannot but long to be overſpread with pure and eternal Light. The Captive exile haſteneth that he may be looſed, Iſa. 51.14.and that he ſhould not die in the pit, nor that his bread ſhould fail; But then this longing muſt be attended with patience; for we may ſin even in deſiring Heaven, when we deſire it with too much precipitancy and haſte; and in this, good men are many times very much to blame; many times when a Perſon meets with ſome heavy ſickneſs, or ſome very troubleſome affliction, he is apt to ſay, Oh that God would now take me to Heaven! there is a great deal of ſelf-love in this; and our Nature, when it finds it ſelf oppreſt, would fain be at eaſe; but we muſt not forget, that we muſt bear the Croſs, and ſuffer, before it will be our time to reign. We muſt hold on in our Race, though the Weather be foul and ſtormy: many thouſand pains may be our Lot, ere God will call us hence; and the firſt thing that we are to deſire, is, that we may have faith, and ſubmiſſion wherewith to bear thoſe Pains, and to perſevere till he be pleaſed to call us. Some indeed he is pleaſed to diſmiſs from this Earth to his Heaven, as on the ſudden, but if you conſider, you will find the greateſt part of his Servants have long troubles, manifold Agonies, tedious Conflicts, and heavy Pains, before they come to that Glory; and in this reſpect, they find the Gate that leads to Life to be very ſtrait and narrow. The Land of Promiſe is indeed a pleaſant Land; it flows with Milk and Honey; but there are many Gyants to conquer in our way thither: your deſires of Heaven cannot be truly regular, unleſs you be content o glorify him by ſuffering, as well as by the doing of his Will. And even with patience there may be an earneſt and affectionate deſire to be with God; and thus ſome of the Saints have breathed out their Prayers; Oh time! run faſt, and remove days and hours out of the way, that I may enjoy, for ever enjoy the beloved of my Soul! Farewel all ye my Friends and Relations, for I am going to better Friends: Farewel all my temporal Poſſeſſions, for I am now going to be poſſeſſed of an Inheritance incorruptible and undefiled, that fades not away: Farewel eating, and drinking, and ſleeping, and all my pleaſures and recreations; for I am now going to the Supper of the Lamb, and ſhall not need theſe weak ſupports of frail Nature any more. And others have cried out, Oh, my God! let me not ſtill be in darkneſs, and provoke thee, and hazard my Salvation, and pleaſe the Devil, and add ſin to ſin! Oh why is my deſire ſtill unſatisfied! When ſhall I have nothing more to wiſh for! when will it once be, that I ſhall be delivered! Oh, come Lord, leſt I be weary of my work and duty; leſt my Graces be like poor tired Soldiers, that fall into confuſions, and ſo loſe the day. Happy is the man that loves thee above all; happy is the man whoſe hope and truſt is in Thee; but moſt happy is he that is with Thee, where I alſo long to be.
Thus I have finiſhed the Application. And I hope there are ſeveral of my Readers, whoſe Conſciences, after ſuch a tryal, do ſalute them with happy tidings, and ſay, You are thoſe that have Gods Favour. And oh what happy People are all ſuch! happy ſhall they be in life, happy in their death, and happy for evermore.
Some will ſay, Happy are the men that are rich and great, that have thriving Trades, numerous Attendants, and ſwelling Titles; that have plenty of Gold and Silver; that need take no care how to live, and are freed from all the pinching anxieties of a poor and a low Eſtate; Pſal. 144.15. It may be ſaid to every ſuch perſon in the Language of the Angel Gabriel to the bleſſed Virgin; Hail thou that art highly favoured! the Lord is with thee, Luke 1.28. and in v. 30. Fear not, Mary, for thou haſt found favour with God. And what indeed can they fear, whoſe Friend he is, that is ſo good, and ſo powerful!