The Christian Sacrifice, Part 4 · July
July.
The Meditation before.
HOW can I think that I love my Saviour ſo dearly, as I ought? And without love who can be welcome gueſts at his holy Table? They are often in my thoughts, whom I love with a ſenſible paſſion. My mind is perpetually looking towards them. I delight in their company and converſation; and ever labour to recommend my ſelf to their affections, by conforming my ſelf to their will and humour. How do I ſtudy to pleaſe them? And if they will tell me what will pleaſe them, O how glad am I of the opportunity to ſerve them? Nay I can croſs my ſelf and my own inclinations, to follow theirs. I love they ſhould be honoured and eſteemed by all. I am much caſt down, if I have given them any diſguſt: and not a little troubled, that others have offended them, or done them any wrong. O that I felt but this little ſign of a tender love and regard to my ſweet Redeemer! that my heart were wounded (now that I am going to behold his wounds) for the juſt offence I have at any time given him; and the great forgetfulneſs and ingratitude of moſt of thoſe that are called by his Name. He may well be diſpleaſed, if it be but for the defects of my love, and the coldneſs of my affection to him; who hath deſerved to be remembred with the greateſt paſſion. For I have long profeſſed love to him. I have received many teſtimonies of his ſpecial kindneſs to me; and given many aſſurances of mine to him. And yet how pale and dim are thoſe marks of a great love to him, which are plainly viſible in me to others? Am I ever caſting mine eyes towards him? Doth he often preſent himſelf before my mind, and feelingly touch my heart? Am I never better pleaſed, than when I am going to him? Is the queſtion rather what will pleaſe him, than whether I ſhall do it? He hath declared his will in his holy Goſpel; Am I glad to hear of it, and read it, and very deſirous to know it in all things? Can I forſake my own will chearfully, to follow his? And doth it grieve me much that his excellent laws are not obſerved; and that all Chriſtians do not love and honour him?
O Lord, thou knoweſt our weakneſs; and how hard it is to keep our minds and hearts ſo ſtedfaſtly fixed upon inviſible things. And in great pitty therefore haſt ordained holy myſteries, for a frequent remembrance of thee; and to repreſent thy ſelf and thy love more ſenſibly to us. By this means I hope to grow in time to a perfect love: ever bearing thee in mind; and delighting to give thee thanks and praiſe; and conforming my ſelf to thy bleſſed will; and deſiring and ſtudying that thy name may be hallowed and honoured by me and by all men elſe throughout the world. This hope incourages me to go to thy Table, though very unworthy to be entertained by thee. There I hope alſo, my Lord will meet me, and ſpeak kindly to me; as one that loves him, at leaſt, a little better than any thing beſide; and is reſolved and determined to love him more and more. He invites us thither to increaſe our faith, and to nouriſh our love, and to ſtrengthen our hope, and excite our gratitude; and exerciſe all our graces: and therefore I will not refuſe his kindneſs; even becauſe I deſire and long to love him ſo much.
But firſt, my ſoul, let us examine our ſelves, whether we be ſure that this, indeed, is the very ſenſe of our heart: that we really love to pleaſe him in every thing; and heartily mean to proceed in this love, to the moſt ready and willing obedience to all his Commands. And doth it not become us humbly to confeſs the fooliſh wandrings of our affections from him; to bluſh for ſhame that we fall ſo ſhort of our own reſolutions; and to excite our ſelves to greater watchfulneſs and diligence in well doing? Ought not the very remembrance of our former coldneſs, to put a greater heat into us? And our former backwardneſs, make us to be more forward and zealous? Should we not vow our hearts again to him? And let him know, that we ſhall not think we live when we do not love him; and that we ſhall be willing to die that we may more love him? But how can we hope to grow ſtill better, by theſe new expreſſions of his love to which he invites us; without his gracious aſſiſtance, which ought to be faithfully implored? Let us go then to him before-hand, and deſire him to raiſe up thoſe thoughts and affections in us, which we cannot produce in our ſelves: that we may bring an heart full of love to him and carry it away full of joy, to find it more inlarged to love and ſerve him.
The Prayer before.
O Moſt holy and ever bleſſed Lord of heaven and earth; who art good and doſt good to all thy Creatures, and to us above all the reſt, who are moſt unworthy of thy loving kindneſs. It is but a part of my duty to admire and praiſe thy great and glorious perfections; to reverence thee, to worſhip thee, to love thee, and with heart and tongue both here and eternally to acknowledg my dependance on thee, to give thee thanks and ſpeak good of thy Name. But it becomes me no leſs to debaſe my ſelf in the loweſt manner before thee; becauſe all that I ſpeak in thy praiſe, declares my foul ingratitude to thee my Creator and conſtant benefactor. There is nothing that I can juſtly call my own, without thy leave, and I have received exceeding much from thy bounty, and thou haſt made me that I might enjoy ſatisfaction in thee, the moſt Soveraign good, and taken care to bring me acquainted with thee; which ought now to be remembred with the greateſt humility, thankfulneſs, and joyful reſignation of my ſelf and all that I have to thy obedience. But alas! how little do I feel thee, though I live and move and have my being in thee? Though I have taſted of thine abundant goodneſs every moment, how late was it before I ſeriouſly thought of my obligations to thee? Now that I ſee thou haſt ſent thy ſon, the expreſs image of thy perſon among us, how little is it that I know of thee, and what a ſtranger am I ſtill to thee? I have been too willing to receive but ſmall benefit by his appearing; and to content my ſelf with a little meaſure of that purity, wiſdom and goodneſs, which he came to impart unto us. Thus fooliſh and ignorant have I been: and it was but fit that we ſhould ſink into the greateſt ſtupidity, when we were ſuch fools as to leave thee, and follow the counſels and deſires of our own hearts. For ever adored be thy infinite charity, who art not willing to loſe us, when we are ſo forward to loſe thee and our ſelves. Bleſſed be the exceeding abundance of thy grace in Chriſt Jeſus, which continues to invite even ſuch ſenſeleſs wretches to come unto thee; who have ſo little eſteemed it, or know how to value the unſearchable riches of it. The marvellous greatneſs of thy forbearing and pardoning mercy, if nothing elſe, will incline and excite my heart, I hope, to love thee much above all things. That ſo at laſt I may love thy bleſſed nature, and perfectly underſtand that it is my happineſs, to have thy image renewed in me, in righteouſneſs and true holineſs. Thou haſt often convinced me, praiſed be thy goodneſs, that it is impoſſible for me otherwiſe to be happy. Thou haſt wrought many ſtrong reſolutions in my ſoul, to be guided and governed by thine unerring wiſdom, and holy will. And I have felt the comforts of a pure, humble, meek, merciful, peaceable, and loving diſpoſition of heart. Perfect, good Lord, what thou haſt wrought in me: that all the pious inclinations of my ſoul, may ſettle in a firm and laſting habit of well-doing. Our righteouſneſs, I know, cannot profit thee; but thou delighteſt to communicate thy ſelf to thy creatures; eſpecially to thoſe who think it the greateſt treaſure to be inriched with thy wiſdom, and to be made partakers of a divine Nature. O thou who haſt given me this knowledg, who haſt given me a will to chuſe thee for my portion, make me compleatly happy in being made exactly like unto thee.
Meet me graciouſly when I approach to thy Table, and repreſent thy Son Jeſus ſo feelingly to me; that my mind may be more clearly illuminated to underſtand the beauteous perfections of his holineſs, and my will more ſtrongly bent to cleave unto him, and all the powers of my ſoul mightily inlivened to follow and imitate him to the end. I go with a deſire, O Lord, to learn of him; that I may henceforth have low thoughts of my ſelf, as having received all I have from thy fulneſs; and low thoughts of all enjoyments on earth, as a ſmall part of that happineſs to which thou haſt deſigned me; and hateful thoughts of every ſin, as that which is oppoſite both to thee and to my own happineſs. O that the thoughts of thy goodneſs, may ever hereafter make me partaker of more of thy holineſs: that thy mercy and indulgence may never tempt me in the leaſt to offend thee, but rather affright me into thy obedience: that I may love thee ſo much as to feel it a ſatisfaction to croſs my own deſires, to fulfil thy will and pleaſure. O that it may be a comfort to me, to be able to deny them; and that I may account it the greateſt victory to overcome my ſelf; my higheſt triumph that thou, Lord, conquereſt, and makeſt me thy willing ſubject. I hope to be ſubdued perfectly unto thee, and enabled to maintain a ſoveraign dominion over all things here: ſo that I may uſe them all ſoberly, moderately and with due acknowledgments to thee, and charity to men, but be brought in ſubjection unto none. Amen, Lord Jeſus; who liveſt and reigneſt for ever, with the Father and the holy Spirit, in power and glory:Heb. 10.13. from henceforth expecting till all thine enemies be made thy foot-ſtool. In his moſt holy name and words, I ſue for mercy, deſiring to be heard, according to the largeſt ſenſe and meaning of them.
Our Father which art, &c.
The Meditation afterward.
WHat makes thee ſigh, my Soul, now that thou haſt been with thy Saviour? Is it becauſe thou art departed from that holy place, where thou ſaweſt his glory, and beheld how he loved thee? Alas! we cannot endure always to dwell in his houſe: we are too weak, while we are in this fleſhly Tabernacle, to remain in the heights of love. Saint Paul came down again, when he was caught up into Paradiſe, and could not ſtay in the midſt of thoſe joys. But thou art afraid thou ſhalt forget Him, now that thoſe ſenſible repreſentations are removed from thine eyes. And that thy love and thy joy will vaniſh, now that thou art gone from his bleſſed preſence. Be of good Comfort: for he is every where, and will not abſent himſelf if thou art ſo deſirous of his company. His word is nigh thee, even in thy mouth, Rom. 10.and in thy heart. Look into his holy Goſpel, and read again and again the ſtory of his love. Look into thy ſelf, and ſee what he hath already done for thee, and he will not fail to be ever doing more. He hath given thee a well of living water, Joh. 4.1….ſpringing up into everlaſting life, if thou believeſt the Goſpel, the word of his grace: And thou mayeſt feed continually on the remembrances, which he hath now given thee of himſelf. He deſires thou wouldſt make him like thy daily bread, and be ever drawing life, and power, and joy from him, the fountain of life. Doth not he love Holineſs, better than thou canſt do thy ſelf? Is it not his own life, his image, his nature formed in thee? Did he not live, did he not die, did he not riſe again, and is he not at Gods right hand, and hath he not an unchangeable Prieſthood,1 Pet. 3.18 Heb. 7.19. Tit. 2.14. that he may bring us to God, and purifie to himſelf a peculiar people, zealous of good works? Be confident of this very thing,Phil. 1.6. that he which hath begun a good work in thee, will finiſh it until the day of Jeſus Chriſt. Do but let him know every day that thou loveſt righteouſneſs and hateſt iniquity, Heb. 1.9.and he will crown thee with more of this grace. For it is the character he hath given of himſelf; and he will love to beautifie his own image, and make it fairer and clearer whereſoever he finds it. Do but work out thy ſalvation with fear and trembling, Phil. 2.12.15.leſt thou ſhouldeſt neglect ſuch great ſalvation, Heb. 2.3.now that he worketh in thee to will and do of his good pleaſure: and thou needeſt not fear, but that he will continue to work in thee for ever. That little light which is in thee ſhall increaſe to a perfect day. Thy love, though but like a ſpark, ſhall burn and flame: and thou ſhalt ſhine as a light in the world, 1 Theſſ. 5.24.in the midſt of a crooked and perverſe generation, holding forth the word of life. Faithful is he that calleth thee, who alſo will do it. Phil. 4.4.And therefore, Rejoyce in the Lord alway: and again he ſaith, Rejoyce. Neh. 8.10.For the joy of the Lord is our ſtrength: and they that rejoyce greatly in his holy Comforts ſhall go from ſtrength to ſtrength; every one of them ſhall, in the high and holy place, appear before God.
And here remember, that the more thou canſt forgo thy own will to ſatisfie his; the more aſſured thou wilt grow that he delights in thee, and will rejoyce over thee to do thee good: and ſo thou canſt never fail to find thy joy in him to be full. Therefore reſolve particularly all this Month to meditate often upon his abſolute RESIGNATION to his Fathers will in all things: of which he hath given ſuch a perfect example from the beginning to the end of his life.Heb. 10.5.7. When he came into the World, he ſaid, Lo, I come to do thy will, O God. When he preached among men he proteſted,Joh. 5.30. ſaying, I can of mine own ſelf do nothing: becauſe I ſeek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath ſent me. And when he was an hungred he proteſted again;Joh. 4.34. My meat is to do the will of him that ſent me, and to finiſh his work. And when he was in his bittereſt Agony, from which nature was paſſionately averſe, he ſubmitted himſelf nevertheleſs with the greateſt meekneſs,Mark 14.36. Luke 22.42. ſaying, Not what I will, but what thou wilt. Not my will, but thine be done. Labour thou to form thy ſelf to the ſame mind and diſpoſition, both in doing and in ſuffering: Remembring the word that he ſaid unto his Apoſtles, The Diſciple is not above his Maſter, nor the Servant above his Lord. Joh. 15.20 Matth. 10.24. Joh. 13.17It is enough for the Diſciple that he be as his Maſter, and the Servant as his Lord. If ye know theſe things, happy are ye if ye do them.
The Prayer and Thanksgiving afterward.
ALmighty and moſt Merciful Father; the Fountain of all life and happineſs: who bountifully communicateſt thy bleſſings, and every where overfloweſt in thy mercies to all thy creatures. More eſpecially to the ſons of men, who are ſurrounded with an Ocean of them, the bounds of which we cannot ſee, and the depth whereof we cannot fathom. And the more thirſty any Souls are, and humbly deſirous to receive them, the more it pleaſes thee to pour out thy mercies upon them; the more thou delighteſt in the iſſues of thy bounteous goodneſs to them. I thine unworthy ſervant, encompaſſed about with thy ſalvation, come to make my humble acknowledgments, and ſuch returns of love and dutiful affection, as I am able, to thy Divine Majeſty. If I had the Spirits of all Creatures united in me, I could not conceive, or worthily expreſs thy loving kindneſs. Who haſt raiſed me out of Nothing, to an excellent degree of being; indued me with reaſon and wiſdom; inſtructed me in the Chriſtian faith; and therein let me ſee ſuch things as eye never ſaw, 1 Cor. 2.9.ear never heard, Pſal. 68.18.nor did it enter into the heart of man to conceive: that the Lord God ſhould dwell among us, Epheſ. 1.20.21.and our Nature be exalted at his right hand, far above all Angels, Principalities and Powers, and every name that is named, not only in this world, but alſo in that which is to come. Bleſſed be the infinite wiſdom and goodneſs of God, which ſent his Son Jeſus, born of a woman, to die for us, and to be a propitiation for our ſins: and by means of death, hath crowned him with glory and honour, that we might have a bleſſed hope of glory, honour and immortality together with himſelf. I ought to be overwhelmed with the thoughts of thy mercies, which I cannot comprehend. The great load of them, The exceeding great load of them, ought to preſs my heart continually, to ſend them all back again in eternal love and obedience. Accept, good Lord, I beſeech thee, of ſuch poor expreſſions of them as I have now made unto thee, and of my vows, at thy holy Table, to render unto thee better. There thou haſt been pleaſed to give me a ſweet remembrance of thy paſt loving kindneſs, and aſſurance of the future. Beſtow upon me likewiſe ſuch a wiſe and conſidering heart, that I may ſink my thoughts deeper and deeper into the vaſt Sea of thy mercies: and think my ſelf happy when I am filled with ſuch a great ſenſe of them, that all my thoughts, deſires and actions, are under the power of Heavenly love. O that the love of God my Saviour may be ever admirable in mine eyes! that I may delight to think of thy love, to ſpeak of thy love, and to imitate thy love: ſo that all inordinate affections may die in me, and I may perform moſt ready and eaſie obedience to all thy commands. Thou haſt laid alſo great ingagements upon me, in that whileſt thou makeſt this extraordinary proviſion for my Soul, thou haſt not neglected my Body: but taken care that a world of good things ſhould ſerve my needs and pleaſure continually. O that my heart were but duly ſenſible of all thy goodneſs! I know then, that I could not deny thee any thing thou deſireſt, who haſt opened thy hand ſo liberally to me, even beyond my deſires. I could not but truſt thee; and reſign my will wholly to thee; and be contented with what thou ordereſt for me; and in every thing give thanks, which is thy will in Chriſt Jeſus concerning me.
All that I have and can do is too little to give thee. I can love thee but a little; and therefore I deſire that all the world would love thee, and worſhip thee, and glorifie thy name. For thou art great and doſt wondrous things. Pſal. 86.10.thou art God alone. O that all the Kings of the Earth would praiſe thee, O Lord. Yea, 138.4, 5.that they would ſing in the ways of the Lord: for great is the glory of the Lord. That they may think it their greateſt honour to be the Subjects of our Saviour, and their greateſt ſecurity to obey him and obſerve his Laws: That being intruſted with thy divine power, they may imploy it to right thoſe that ſuffer wrong, to eaſe the oppreſſed of their burdens, ſupply the wants of the poor, defend the fatherleſs and widow; and comfort all mankind in their miſeries. I recommend this Church and Kingdom, our Sovereign and all his Subjects, to thy moſt powerful Protection: beſeeching thee to endue us all with thy Heavenly grace, to diſpoſe us to love thy true Religion, and to be zealous of good works: that our Lord and Maſter may be honoured by us, and all men may know we are his Diſciples, by our loving one another. Now to the moſt High God, Dan. 4.34, 35.who liveth for ever, whoſe dominion is an everlaſting dominion, and his kingdom from generation to generation: before whom all the inhabitants of the Earth are reputed as Nothing: and he doth according to his will in the Army of Heaven, and among the inhabitants of the Earth; be bleſſing, and honour, and praiſe rendred, by me and by all Creatures now and eternally. Amen.