Parents Groans over their Wicked Children, Errata

Parents Groans over their Wicked Children · Errata

ERRATA.

Page 35. line 19. inſtead of cinque, read ſink.

Page 82. line 21. read afflictions.

p. 1Parents Groans over their wicked Children.

Prov. XVII. 25.

A fooliſh ſon is a grief to his father, and bitterneſs to her that bare him.

IT is one great argument of the vanity of this world, that we may be ſpoil'd of all that is dear to us under the Sun by the ſins of other men.

A common and ſad inſtance of this is, That the Comforts of godly Parents here are very much at the will and pleaſure of their own Children: For had a p. 2good man all other delights that the creatures can yield, and did waſh his ſteps in butter, and dip his foot in oyl: Nay ſuppoſe he had all the pleaſures of Godlineſs that are ordinarily attained in this life, yet he will be a man of ſorrow, if a wicked Child make him the Father of a fool.

This doleful caſe is preſented to us in this Text, which I have choſen for the ſubject of this diſcourſe, that I may duly affect my own and others hearts with this great calamity.

In the Text two things are clearly ſet before us.

1. A caſe taken for granted; and that is, That godly Parents have often fooliſh Children.

2. The miſery of that caſe is expreſſed; that is, That ſuch Children are a grief to their Fathers, and bitterneſs to the Mothers that bare them.

The Explication of the Text.

A fooliſh ſon, that is, a wicked and ungodly ſon, or daughter; for it's uſual in this book of the Proverbs, that both ſexes are intended, when but one p. 3is expreſſed: Wicked Children think themſelves wiſe, wiſer than their Parents, or Maſters, or Miniſters; for vain man would be wiſe, though he be like a wild Aſſes colt, Job 11.12. But all the Devils children are fools; for he that will obey and imitate the Devil, who is a murderer of all his own children, and will not obey and imitate Chriſt who is the Redeemer and Saviour of all his Children, I may ſay of him in the words of a wiſe Woman, A fool is his name, and folly is with him.

Is a grief to his Father. By Father and Mother in the Text, I underſtand a godly Father and Mother, who are moſt affected with this caſe. Is a grief: ſome render the word anger, or indignation, and both grief and anger are intended; for a fooliſh ſon maketh his good Father both angry and ſad.

And bitterneſs to her that bare him; that is, to his good Mother, called her that bare him, to aggravate the Mothers miſery, and the Childs ſin: It cannot but torment the good Mother to think that ſhe did with ſo much ſickneſs, and p. 4pain, and ſorrow bear and bring forth one that proves a child of the Devil, and is like to be a firebrand of Hell; and it's a great aggravation of the childs ſins, to imbitter the life of her that was a means of life to him; and to haſten that womb to the worms, which with ſuch pangs and throws brought him into the world.

The Text will be further opened in the following diſcourſe, which I ſhall reduce to theſe three Heads.

Firſt, That it is ordinary for godly Parents to have wicked and ungodly Children.

Secondly, That this is a very great calamity to theſe godly Parents.

Thirdly, Uſe.

1. It is ordinary for godly Parents to have wicked and ungodly Children: this is implied in the Text: And I may ſay of this what Solomon ſpeaks of another caſe, Eccleſ. 6.1. It is an evil which I have ſeen under the Sun, and it is common among men.

In the handling of this, I ſhall

1. Give ſome Characters of godly Parents.

p. 52. Some Characters of ungodly Children.

3. I ſhall give you ſeveral inſtances for the confirmation of it.

1. I ſhall only give you two main Characters of godly Parents.

Firſt, They are conſcienciouſly careful for their preſervation.

Secondly, For the Eternal happineſs and ſalvation of their Children.

1. They are conſcienciouſly careful for the preſervation of the natural lives of their Children, as trees ſupport and feed the branches that grow out of themſelves: And as it's natural to the brutes to defend and keep their own young, ſo nature it ſelf teacheth and inclineth Parents to defend, and preſerve, and provide for the fruit of their own bodies: and for this end to ſupply them with food, raiment, and phyſick, and to fit them for callings, and ſeaſonably to provide for them meet yokefellows, and every way to take care, that they neither periſh or be made miſerable: but godly Parents, in whom natural affections are ſanctified p. 6and improved by Grace, do all theſe out of a principle of Godlineſs, as perſons who have to do with God herein: they do it in a ſenſe of their dependance on God, and pray for daily bread to feed their Children, and are thankful when they feel it come warm from their Father in Heaven; they do it in obedience and faithfulneſs to God; and with a deſign, that their Children may live to be born of God, and to be a bleſſing to this world, and be bleſſed in the other world: As for thoſe unnatural monſters, who feed their luſts with that which ſhould maintain their Children; they are ſo far from being Godly Parents, that they are worſe than Infidels, in not providing for their Families; and are like the Devil, who (as I ſaid, is a Murderer of his own Children.

2. They are conſcienciouſly careful for the Eternal happineſs and ſalvation of their Children; for their natural affections being now ſanctified, do work in them for the ſpiritual good and happineſs of their Children. Prov. 4.3, 4, 5. p. 7I was my fathers ſon, tender and only beloved in the ſight of my mother. Solomon was his fathers and mothers darling, their love did run out exceedingly upon this ſon; and he tells us which way their love and kindneſs was expreſs'd: he taught me alſo, and ſaid unto me, Get wiſdom, get underſtanding: He tells us alſo how the affections of his good mother did work, Prov. 31.2, 3. What my ſon? and what the ſon of my womb? and what the ſon of my vows? The ſon of her womb, was the ſon of her vows, whom ſhe had devoted to God; thoſe Parents who have known both ſtates, the ſtate of Wrath, and the ſtate of Grace, and have experimentally felt what it is to paſs from death to life, and from the kingdom of Satan, into the kingdom of God, cannot but deſire that the ſame change be wrought upon their children. And as they who love themſelves with a holy love, do take God for their eternal life and happineſs, and Chriſt for their Redeemer, to redeem them from all evil, and to bring them to this happineſs; and the p. 8Spirit for their Sanctifier, to fit them for this happineſs: So they that love their children with this holy Love, will deſire and endeavour that they be partakers with them of the ſame happineſs.

2. I proceed to give you three Characters of ungodly Children.

1. They are ſuch Children as will not be ſubject to the authority of their Parents: The reverence of Children to their Parents is ſo incorporated into the whole body of Religion, that all Religion is in vain without it: this fully appears, Levit. 19.3. Ye ſhall fear every man his mother, and his father, and keep my ſabbaths, I am the Lord your God. Obſerve, this duty is here joyn'd with keeping the Lords Sabbaths, wherein Religion did always very much conſiſt: but it's often ſeen, that diſobedient children are great prophaners of the Lords-day; they are always bad, but uſually worſt on that day; and ſome of them may remember, that their firſt breaking out into ſcandalous ſins, was on the Lords-day. We are here p. 9further taught, That this duty of Reverence to Parents, is joyn'd with all Religion to God; for, ſaith God in effect, it's in vain for any to pretend to call me their Lord and their God, if they do not fear their Parents; and thereſore wicked children are numbred among the moſt flagitious and worſt ſinners. Ezek. 22.7. In thee have they ſet light by father and mother; they villified and deſpiſed them, and made nothing of them: ſuch break all the bonds of Religion; and many haſten through a ſhameful and untimely death, into a dreadful and tormenting eternity, whoſe wickedneſs firſt began in ſcorning and deſpiſing their Parents.

2. They are ſuch children as will not obey the Commands of their Parents: The godly Commands of Parents, are the means which God hath appointed, and doth often bleſs to make the children godly, Gen. 18.19. I know, Abraham, that he will command his children, and his houſhold after him, and they ſhall keep the way of the Lord to do juſtice and judgment: and God commands p. 10all children to obey all the holy and lawful commands of their parents, Epheſ. 6.1. Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right: It's the parents right that their children ſhould obey them; and it's Gods right that they ſhould obey them in the Lord: and this, ſaith the Apoſtle, Col. 3.21. is well-pleaſing to the Lord: ſo that thoſe children do neither fear provoking God, nor care to pleaſe him, who will not obey their parents; and ſo are children of their parents ſorrow, and of Gods wrath.

3. They are ſuch children as are unthankful to their parents; the Apoſtle tells us, 1 Tim. 5.4. That it is good and acceptable before God for children to requite their parents: and they have great things for which they ſhould labour to requite their godly parents, viz. for all their care, and coſt, and pains to keep them alive, and for all their diligence and faithfulneſs in endeavouring to make them bleſſed; and all the requital which the poor parents deſire, is, that their children would but p. 11love and obey God, and not damn themſelves; but theſe ungodly children are ſo far from requiting them, that like ſo many Dogs and Lyons, they tear in pieces the hearts and bowels of their tender parents.

3. I now come to confirm this, That it's ordinary for godly parents to have ungodly children: and for this end. I ſhall firſt give you ſome inſtances recorded in Scripture. 2dly, I ſhall inſtance in ſeveral caſes wherein this is verified.

1. I ſhall only give you four inſtances recorded in Scripture for the confirmation hereof.

1. Inſtance is in Adam and Eve; theſe were both godly parents; and therefore in that firſt Evangelical promiſe, Gen. 3.15. we have notice of the two great parties in the world; the one was the Woman, and her ſeed; and the other the Serpent, and his ſeed, and of the enmity betwixt them; and though there is only mention made of the woman, yet the man is alſo included; ſo that by the woman and her ſeed, we are p. 12to underſtand Adam and Eve, and Chriſt and his Church; and by the Serpent, and his ſeed, are meant the Devils, and all the devils children; and foraſmuch as we find Adam and Eve of the ſame party with Chriſt and his Church, and in enmity with the Devil and his ſeed, we conclude them to be godly perſons, and godly parents: Moreover we find Geneſ. 4. that they brought up their children in that Religion, and to worſhip God in the uſe of thoſe Ordinances which he had then inſtituted as a means of their ſalvation: theſe two were the firſt-fruits of Chriſt; the firſt perſons that ever entered into the Covenant of Grace; and Chriſt might ſay to them, as Jacob ſaid to Reuben, Gen. 49.3. Ye are my firſt-born, my might, and the beginning of my ſtrength. At firſt the whole Church of God was only in theſe two perſons, and yet theſe are the parents of that curſed and bloody Cain. And I ſhall obſerve three things in this hiſtory that render this caſe very doleful.

p. 131. That Eve was ſo exceeding glad for the birth of Cain: ſome are of opinion, that ſhe thought ſhe had brought forth the promiſed Meſſiah; and that made her break out with joy, ſaying, Gen. 4.1. I have gotten a man from the Lord: and yet this is he of whom the Apoſtle ſpeaks, 1 John 3.12. He was of that wicked one, meaning the devil: This is a common caſe, that parents are exceedingly glad for the birth of a child, and call their friends and neighbours to rejoyce with them; and yet that ſweet and pleaſant babe proves the greateſt torment to their parents, which ever they met with in their whole age.

2. Conſider his crime, he barbarouſly murdered his own brother, Gen. 4.8. Cain roſe up againſt Abel his brother, and ſlew him: He conſidered not how this would grieve the heart of his good Father and Mother, nor that he was the elder brother, and therefore ought to have nouriſhed the life of the younger, and to have been a pattern of holineſs and love to him; neither did he conſider that he hated p. 14and murder'd not only a brother, but alſo a holy child of God, and for that which he ought to have honoured and loved him; becauſe his brothers works were righteous: and he conſidered not how his brothers blood would cry to God for vengeance againſt him; no bonds, or arguments, or reaſons will prevail with ungodly children.

3. Conſider the dreadful judgment of God, both upon himſelf and his poſterity: Gods judgment on his ſoul was ſo dreadful, that he deſperately cries out, Gen. 4.13. Mine ini quity is greater than that it may be forgiven: he was caſt out of the favour of God, excommunicated from the Church, and all his poſterity were excluded from communion therewith: they are call'd the ſons and daughters of men, in oppoſition to the Sons of God, and at laſt all periſhed in the deluge of waters; and yet, I ſay, this bloody and curſed monſter was the ſon, the eldeſt ſon of the two firſt godly parents that ever were in the world.

p. 152d Inſtance is in Noah; the firſt inſtance was in the firſt godly man in the old world, as the ages before the flood are called, 2 Pet. 2.5. This inſtance is in the beſt man in the new World after the flood: this Noah hath a great character in the Scriptures, Gen. 6.8, 9. Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord. Noah was a juſt man, and perfect in his generations. When all the earth was debauch'd and corrupt, Gen. 6.11, 12. yet then was Noah juſt and upright, and walked with God, it's he that is called in 2 Pet. 2.5. A preacher of righteouſneſs: It is he that was ſo much in the favour of God, that he and his family were ſingled out to be preſerved in the Ark, when all the world beſides were drown'd and periſh'd in the waters: yet this holy Noah was the Father of that wicked Ham, whom all the waters of Noah (as the Scripture calls that deluge) were not effectual to eure of his wickedneſs; but he went a wicked man into the Ark, and came wicked out; inſomuch that his own holy Father was inſpired by a prophetical ſpirit, p. 16to curſe both his ſon and poſterity, and the crime mentioned, Gen. 9.22, 25. was his irreverence and diſreſpect to his father.

3d Inſtance is in Iſaac, that holy Patriarch, who ſo greatly feared God, that his ſon Jacob gives God that honourable name, Gen. 31.42. The fear of Iſaac, meaning the God whom Iſaac feared; yet he and that good mother Rebekkah were the parents of a wicked Eſau, whom God is ſaid to hate, Rom. 9.13. I know we read Gen. 25.28. that Iſaac loved Eſau: but we ſee that children may be greatly beloved of their parents, and yet abhorred and curſed of God.

4th Inſtance is in David, call'd a man after Gods own heart, whom God rais'd up to be king of Iſrael: he was a Penman, of a conſiderable part of the holy Scriptures; ſuch an eminent type of Chriſt, that Chriſt himſelf is often call'd David in Scripture; yet he was the tender father of that wicked Abſolom, who bloodily murdered his brother Amnon, and miſerably and ſhamefully p. 17dyed in Treaſon and Rebellion againſt his Royal Father, whoſe bitter lamentation is yet in our ears, 2 Sam. 18.33. O my ſon Abſolom, my ſon, my ſon Abſolom! would God I had died for thee; O Abſolom my ſon, my ſon!

2dly, I ſhall further inſtance in four Caſes, wherein this is often verified.

1. Thoſe Children who are moſt beloved of their parents, do often prove the moſt wicked Children. Abſolom was David's darling; inſomuch, that although he ſet his whole kingdom in a flame, and conſtrained his father to fly for his life; yet when David ſent out his Army to ſuppreſs that rebellion, he gives this charge to his Commanders, in the audience of the Soldiers, 2 Sam. 18.5. Deal gently for my ſake with the young man, even with Abſolom.

And it often happens, that the Children who have moſt of their Parents love and delight, and whoſe looks and talk they are moſt taken with, and whom they are moſt apt to boaſt of, and are moſt unwilling to part with, p. 18and in whom they promiſe themſelves moſt content and pleaſure, do often prove the greateſt ſcourge and torment to their parents; for it is not the love of the godly parents, but the love of God that makes children holy and happy.

2. This is often the ſad caſe of ſome holy Miniſters of the Word: I know it's a Popiſh and peeviſh humour in ſome to ſay, that Miniſters children never do well; indeed every thing of Miniſters is moſt expoſed to the obſervation of people, and therefore the wickedneſs of their children is moſt obſerv'd and talk'd of; but the holy, learned, and every-way proſperous and bleſſed ſeed of divers godly Miniſters, is ſufficient to confute and ſhame the ignorance of people herein; and yet it is true that many godly Miniſters in all ages have groan'd under this ſad calamity: Eli was a holy Prieſt of God, but his two ſons were Devils incarnate, monſters of men, ſcandalous, ſacrilegious and adulterous ſons of Belial, as p. 19appears 1 Sam. 2. And this is no rare thing, that the Prayers, Studies, Sermons, Examples of many good Miniſters are often made ſucceſsful to bring others to Heaven, when they can by no means reſtrain their own children from running to Hell, and their own children make them do the work of their Miniſtry with grief, when often the children of drunkards, worldlings, and whoremongers will be their crown and glory in the day of the Lord Jeſus.

3. This is often true, when both parents are godly; indeed when either father or mother is wicked, no marvel if the children be hardned in their ſins by their examples: but it's uſually ſeen, that when children have both the inſtruction of the father, and alſo the law of the mother; and when they cry to all the Miniſters and Chriſtians about them, to help them by their prayers and counſels to ſave their children; yet all prevail not, but the holy father and mother can ſcarce keep one anothers hearts from being broken by their p. 20ſtubborn and diſobedient children.

4. The children of godly parents often prove wicked, when God doth ſanctifie, and bleſs, and ſave the children of ungodly parents; we ſee ſometimes trees of righteouſneſs, growing in the families of the wicked, when briars and thorns grow up in the families of the righteous: We read Matth. 1. that Ahaz, a very wicked king, begat holy Hezekiah, and good Hezekiah begat Manaſſeh, who was an Idolater of the higheſt rate; a Witch, and ſuch a bloody murderer, that the Chronicle of his reign tells us, 2 Kings 21.16. He ſhed innocent blood very much, till he had filled Jeruſalem from one end to the other (though afterwards he is ſet forth to be the greateſt pattern of the grace of God in the Old Teſtament, as Paul is in the New Teſtament): It is no new ſight to ſee children of the beſt Saints in the way to Hell, and children of Atheiſts and Perſecutors in the way to Heaven; Nay, though ſome parents do perſecute their own children for loving p. 21and fearing God, yet they cannot debauch them; when all endeavours of godly parents will not prevail to make their children hate ſin, and love God: and this is one of the ſaddeſt inſtances of that great myſtery of Providence, mentioned Eccleſ. 8.14. There he juſt men, to whom it happeneth according to the work of the wicked: again, there be wicked men, to whom it happeneth according to the work of the righteous.

2. Head. It is a very great calamity to godly parents to have wicked and ungodly children; A fooliſh ſon (ſaith the text) is a grief to his father, and bitterneſs to her that bare him: To the ſame purpoſe is that, Prov. 17.21. He that begetteth a fool, doth it to his ſorrow, and the father of a fool hath no joy; a fooliſh ſon damps all his joy: and Prov. 19.13. A fooliſh ſon is the calamity of his father.

I ſhall ſet forth the greatneſs of this trouble by theſe Eight particulars:

p. 221. By the matter of theſe parents grief.

2. By the paſſions that this calamity doth move and affect.

3. By comparing this with other afflictions, and ſhewing how this exceeds them.

4. By ſhewing that this makes theſe parents do all their work with grief and ſorrow.

5. By ſhewing that this embitters all their other comforts.

6. By the ſad concommitants of it.

7. By the ſeveral aggravations of it.

8. By inſtancing in ſome caſes wherein this calamity is more grievous.

Firſt, The matter of theſe parents grief is very ſad, as appears in theſe ſeven things:

1. That their children are ſo defiled and debauched with ſin, which is ſo loathſome to theſe holy parents; it vexed the righteous ſoul of Lot to ſee p. 23and hear the filthy converſation of the beaſtly Sodomites; how grievous then muſt it be to theſe godly parents, to ſee and hear the filthineſs of their own dear children; it is a grievous thing to a man that loves God, and Godlineſs, and Souls, to ſee a drunkard ſtaggering in the ſtreets, or to hear any man blaſpheming and reproaching his Maker and Redeemer; but none can tell but thoſe that feel it, what a ſad ſpectacle it is to ſober and godly parents to ſee their own children drunk; or how it torments them to hear their own children lying, and blaſpheming God and his Saints.

2. That their children are the children of the Devil, and under the power of Satan, and ridden by him, and carried captive by him at his will; it was a lamentable caſe of that good Mother, who came to Chriſt, ſaying, Matth. 15.22. Have mercy upon me, O Lord, thou ſon of David, my daughter is grievouſly vexed with a devil: yet this was not her daughters ſin, but only her great affliction: but how doleful is it to theſe p. 24parents, who have renounced the devil themſelves, and live in continual warfare with him, to ſee the hearts, and mouths, and lives of the children, whom they have devoted to God, fill'd and poſſeſs'd with the devil, whoſe children they are, and whoſe luſts they will do; if the devil tempt the parents, their own graces will reſiſt and overcome his temptations; but they cannot ſecure their children from being overcome, and from falling into the condemnation of the devil; but with ſad hearts do ſee the Lyon of Hell running away with the lambs of their flock, and cannot recover them.

3. That their children are under the wrath and curſe of God; it did ſadly affect the father of that lunatick ſon, mentioned Matth. 17.15. to ſee his ſon fall oft into the fire, and oft into the water: How would he ſcreech at ſuch a ſight, and cry, Ah my dear child will be burnt, my child will be drown'd! but much more terrible is it to theſe parents, who know the terrors of the p. 25Lord, to know that their children have cut off the entail of the Covenant of Grace, and are every moment ready to fall into the hands of the living God! when ſuch parents are, with faith, reading the curſes of Gods Law, how doth it cut them to the heart to think, that they are then reading their childrens doom.

4. That their children are under thoſe black characters, which are given in Scripture to ungodly men; for the faith of theſe parents makes all perſons have that name in their hearts, which they have in the Word: And as God is no reſpecter of perſons, ſo Faith, ſo far as it prevails, reſpecteth not the perſons of any, no not of a mans own children; but becauſe they are more under their notice and obſervation than others, and becauſe they are more concern'd for them, therefore the deeper impreſſions do theſe characters make on their hearts; ſo that this is the miſery of theſe parents, that whileſt they look on perſons through the glaſs of p. 26the Scriptures, and ſee many to be the jewels, and treaſure, and children, and heirs of God, and the glorious bride and ſpouſe of Chriſt; they muſt and do judge their own wicked children to be a generation of vipers, and ſerpents, and dogs, and ſwine, and lyons, and bears, and wolves, as God calls them in his Word.

5. That the anger and diſpleaſure of God appears ſo much againſt theſe good parents herein; indeed the ſenſe of their own folly muſt make them juſtifie God in this ſharp correction, and cauſe them to ſay with Solomon, Prov. 26.3. As it is meet that there be a whip for the horſe, and a bridle for the aſſe; ſo is it, that there be a rod for the fools back: But this is very grievous, that God ſhould correct them with a ſcourge made of their own bowels, and ſhould chaſten a bleſſed father with a curſed child; his holy anger muſt be acknowledged herein; for when the child deſpiſeth his father, God himſelf doth juſtly ſpit in the fathers face.

p. 276. The ſhame and diſgrace which comes to them hereby, Prov. 19.26. He that waſteth his father, and chaſeth away his mother, is a ſon that cauſeth ſhame: Every one will be ready to reflect upon their parents, and to ſay, Surely theſe children were never taught to ſerve God, who do ſo ſacrifice themſelves to the ſervice of the devil.

7. Both parents are deeply affected for the trouble and miſery that comes hereby to one another; their love to, and ſympathy with one another, makes the burden of both more uneaſie: The good father is not only troubled with a wicked child, but alſo for the bitterneſs and ſorrow of his wife; and the good mother is not only troubled with the wicked child, but alſo for the grief of her husband; the mothers heart bleeds to ſee the tears, and to hear the groans of the afflicted father, and cries out, Oh, what a child have I brought forth, that ſo much deprives me of the comfort of a loving husband, and is like to break his heart, p. 28and to make me a deſolate and diſconſolate widow: The father mourns to ſee the tears, and the ſad countenance, and to hear the groans of the diſtreſſed mother; and is ready to cry out, Wo is me, that the child of my bowels is deſtroying the wife of my boſom; and yet theſe hard-hearted children are not affected herewith; but let the parents ſigh, they will ſing; let the parents weep and mourn, they will rant and roar; and care no more to break their parents hearts, than to break a Tobaccopipe; and will not abate a lie, or oath, or cup, to ſave the lives of their tender parents.

Secondly, The greatneſs of this calamity appears by the paſſions in the parents, which are moved and affected hereby. I ſhall only inſtance in three paſſions, Fear, Anger, and Sorrow.

1. Fear: This is a troubleſome paſſion, and godly parents are never out of fear of their wicked children; they p. 29are afraid that every one that knocks at the door, and that every poſt, and every friend that comes to viſit them, brings them ſome ſad tidings of their diſobedient children. I ſhall amplifie this, by inſtancing in three great Evils, which ſuch parents are greatly perplexed with the fear of.

1. They are afraid leſt their children are in the practice of ſome great ſins: this was Jobs fear, when his children were feaſting together, Job 1.5. Job ſaid, It may be my ſons have ſinn'd and curs'd God in their hearts: their children are ſeldom out of their ſight, but the good parents are in fear of this; they know their children are always expos'd to the devils temptations, and to the ſnares of the world, and to the allurements of evil company; and that their corrupt hearts are ſet to comply with all; and that they have provoked God to give them up to their own luſts; and therefore they are in continual fear, leſt theſe poor children are lying, or ſwearing, or curſing, or whoring, or p. 30drunk, and defiling, and debauching, and deſtroying themſelves and others.

2. They are in fear leſt ſome heavy judgment of God will befall them in this life: And thus David, when his ſon Abſolom was in the head of a high rebellion againſt his father, and the battel was to be fought with the Rebels, was fearful leſt his ſon ſhould then periſh in his ſins: theſe parents know that their poor children are out of Gods way, and as birds wandring from the neſt, Prov. 27.8. are expos'd to all manner of danger; they know what the word threatens againſt them, and what fearful inſtances there are of the vengeance of God upon diſobedient children; and therefore they are in fear, leſt their ſins ſhould bring them to ſome untimely, and ſhameful death.

3. They are in fear of their eternal damnation; they are ſenſible that their children are children of wrath, and do live in thoſe ſins for which the wrath of God comes on the children of diſobedience; p. 31and theſe parents believe what Hell is; for as faith in the promiſes is the ſubſtance of things hoped for; ſo faith, as it believes the threatnings, is the ſubſtance of things feared; and therefore they cannot but tremble to think, that their dear lambs, whom they ſo tenderly nouriſh'd and cheriſh'd, are in danger every moment to be caſt into the fire that is prepared for devils.

2. Anger is another paſſion that is moved in godly parents, with the wickedneſs of their children: and this is troubleſome; for a man is never out of trouble whilſt he is in anger; and the more the wills of theſe parents are bent to have their children godly, the more are they diſpleas'd, and provok'd to anger by their ſins: they are angry to ſee them provoke that God whom they themſelves are ſo careful to pleaſe; and to ſee them deſtroying their precious ſouls, which they are labouring to ſave; and to ſee them waſte thoſe eſtates on their filthy luſts, which they have got p. 32by their care, and labour, and prayers: they cannot but think of them with anger, and ſpeak of them with anger, and look at them with anger: and thus their children which ſhould be their delight and pleaſure, are a continual croſs and vexation to them.

3. Sorrow: They are deeply affected with grief and ſorrow for the wickedneſs of their children; the parents graces cauſe them to mourn for their childrens ſins; their ſaving-knowledge makes their hearts bleed to ſee their children ſcorn and deſpiſe that glory which they ſee in God and Chriſt; and whilſt they by faith are feeding on Chriſt, it grieves them to ſee their children feeding themſelves with the dirty pleaſures of ſin; their love to God makes them groan, that their children love ſin the worſt evil, and hate God the chiefeſt good.

Thirdly, I proceed to ſhew the greatneſs of this calamity, by comparing it with other troubles, and ſhewing p. 33how this exceeds them. I ſhall inſtance in four other Troubles.

1. This is a greater calamity than to be without Children; ſo that if God had ſaid of thoſe Parents, as he ſaid of him, Jer. 22.30. Write ye this man, and this woman childleſs, the puniſhment had not been ſo great, as to be afflicted with wicked children: ſuch parents may ſay with our Saviour in another caſe, Luke 23.29. Bleſſed are the barren, and the wombs that never bare, and the paps which never gave ſuck. As it's better to have no herbs in your gardens, than to have only ſtinking-weeds that cumber the ground; and better to have no beaſts in your ground, than a company of foxes and wolves; ſo it's better to have no children, than to have only ſuch who are the continual ſhame, and plague, and torment of their parents.

2. It's a greater miſery than to have diſeaſed, or deformed children: This indeed is a ſore affliction, to be the parents p. 34of ſick, or blind, or lame, or monſtrous children, becauſe ſuch children are naturally diſabled to do that ſervice to God, and their generation, and their parents, which otherwiſe they might do: but this is not ſo grievous as to have wicked children; for they that are moſt diſeaſed and uncomely, are often called to be the bleſſed and glorious children and heirs of God, and the amiable and beautiful bride and ſpouſe of Chriſt, when all wicked children are the filthy and loathſome children of the devil.

3. This is more grievous than the death of children. I know it's matter of deep ſorrow when parents may ſay with the tender Patriarch, Gen. 42.36. Joſeph is not, and Simeon is not: My ſon is dead, and is not; and my dear daughter is dead, and is not; but this ſorrow is not laſting, the impreſſion of it uſually doth, and ſhould wear off; but wicked children are conſtant troubles to their parents, and cauſe them to ſay with the Pſalmiſt, Pſal. 31.10. p. 35My days are ſpent with grief, and my years with ſighing.

4. This calamity is greater than perſecution from wicked men, though that be alſo very grievous; inſomuch that Paul, a man of a great ſpirit, was ſo affected herewith, that he ſolemnly beſeecheth the Roman Chriſtians, Rom. 15.30. For the Lord Jeſus ſake, and for the love of the Spirit, that they would ſtrive together with him in prayer to God for him, to deliver him from perſecutingmen; it is a ſad caſe to be ſmitten and wounded in our names by lying and ſlanderous tongues: David, and Chriſt in him, tells us, Pſal. 69.20. That reproach hath broken his heart: It is ſad for the jewels of God to be accounted and uſed as the ſink and jakes of the world, and to have our eſtates waſted and ſpoyl'd, and to be expos'd to beggery and want, and to be drag'd from our healthful and pleaſant habitations and families, and to be caſt among rogues and thieves into naſty and loathſome priſons, and to have our innocent p. 36and precious blood ſhed by barbarous men: but all this is not ſo grievous as to be tormented by wicked children; for in that caſe we are diſtreſſed by the ſins of our enemies; and if ſo, as David ſpeaks, Pſal. 55.12. We could have born it: But in this caſe we are afflicted by the ſins of our own children, and may ſay with David, when he was reviled by Shimei, 2 Sam. 16.11. Behold my ſon which came forth of my bowels, ſeeketh my life: how much more may this Benjamite? It is a far greater torment to have the children of our own bowels tear and break our hearts, than to be deſtroy'd by mercileſs enemies.

Fourthly, The greatneſs of this calamity is ſeen, in that it cauſeth theſe good parents to do all their work with ſorrow. I ſhall inſtance in three ſorts of Works which they do in the bitterneſs of their Souls: 1. Natural. 2. Civil. 3. Religious Works. He that hath a wicked child on his heart, doth all theſe with a ſad heart.

p. 371. Natural Works: theſe they do with ſorrow: They are fed with the bread of tears, and drink their tears in great meaſure, as the Pſalmiſt ſpeaks in another caſe, Pſal. 80.5. And as it's ſaid, in the prayer of the afflicted, Pſal. 102.9. They eat aſhes like bread, and mingle their drink with weeping.

2. They do their Civil Works with grief: this makes them labour with ſorrow in their particular callings; it was Solomons trouble to think that a fool ſhould have the rule of his labour wherein he laboured, and ſhewed himſelf wiſe under the Sun, Eccleſ. 2.18, 19, 20. And this ſad caſe is often obſerv'd, that the ſame eſtates which were the fruit of the wiſe and good parents prayers, and diligence, are conſum'd upon the childrens luſts; and that the good creatures which were a bleſſing to the parents, and wherewith they did honour God, and feed Chriſt in his members, do prove a curſe to their children, and weapons in their hands wherewith they ſight againſt God and his people.

p. 383. This alſo cauſeth them to do their Religious Works in grief and ſorrow. I ſhall only inſtance in two particulars.

1. This makes them inſtruct theſe poor ungodly children with ſorrow: It is a doleful caſe when men can have their dogs to come at their whiſtle, and their horſes to yield to the bridle, and their oxen to ſubmit to the yoke; but their unruly children will not be ſubject to the holy government of their parents; they can readily learn filthy words, and wicked actions from their ungodly School-fellows, or Fellow-apprentices, or debauch'd companions; but they will not hear the inſtruction of their father, nor obey the law of their mother.

2. This cauſeth them to pray for ſuch children with ſorrow; for according as is the ſpiritual ſtate of the children, ſo are their holy parents affected in prayer to God for them; when they can in prayer call upon God as the Father of their children, and can p. 39preſent their children to God as ſuch, who are born of God, and adopted of him, and can beg mercy for them who are the veſſels of mercy, then they do, as the Apoſtle for the Philippians, Chap. 1.4. In every prayer make requeſt for them with joy: but when children are manifeſtly wicked, and their good parents muſt in prayer to God call them what they are, and muſt ſay, Lord, my poor children are children of the devil, children of diſobedience, children of thy wrath, lying, ſwearing, covetous, drunken, unclean, ſtubborn children; Oh pity, pardon, ſave, convert them; they pray for them, but they pray in the ſorrow and anguiſh of their ſouls.

Fifthly, I come to ſhew how wicked children embitter all the comforts of their good parents; ſo that as Solomon tells us, Prov. 17.21. A father of a fool hath no joy. I ſhall exemplifie this in four particulars.

p. 401. The good parents cannot be ſo comfortable and delightful to one another as they would be, when both are in bitterneſs for their wicked children; the husband cannot be ſuch a comfort to his wife, when he is almoſt in continual anger and ſorrow for his wicked child; nor the wife ſuch a delight to her husband, when her heart is bleeding for her ungodly child; for if they have no joy in themſelves, as was ſaid before, they cannot be ſo much the joy and delight of one another: but when they lye down, this makes them water their bed with tears, and they awake with ſorrow, with a wicked child on their hearts.

2. They cannot take ſo much comfort as they would in the other children that are godly; not that they love them leſs, but rather more; but their joy in them is much interrupted hereby. Suppoſe among many children there be but one ungodly child, that one is a diſturbance and annoyance to the whole family; that one ſinner (as p. 41Solomon ſpeaks in a more general caſe) deſtroys much good; it grieves them to think, that whereas that one child was in the ſame Covenant, and had the ſame dedication to God by Baptiſm, and the ſame affection and education from the parents with all the other children; yet the reſt are veſſels of mercy, but this ſeems to be a veſſel of wrath.

3. They cannot take ſo much comfort in the victory over their own ſins, when they ſee the ſame corruptions which are abhorred, and mortified, and forſaken by the parents, breaking out, and reigning in the children.

4. This interrupts their joy in God and Jeſus Chriſt; when ſuch parents muſt with the ſame faith believe Gods wrath to their children, as they believe his love to themſelves; and when they look upon God as their Father, they muſt look upon him as an enemy to their Children; and when they ſay, We hope Heaven is our portion and p. 42place, it muſt grieve them that their children will not go with them thither.

Sixthly, The greatneſs of this affliction appears further by the concommitants of it. I ſhall only inſtance in three things that uſually accompany it, which make it more grievous.

1. Such children do often impoveriſh their parents; Solomon tells us, that a wicked child waſteth his father, and chaſeth away his mother; ſuch children care not if they ſtarve their poor parents, ſo that they can feed their own luſts; and it's often ſeen, that a plentiful eſtate is conſum'd by riotous children.

2. Such children do often debauch and corrupt the other children, and make their brethren in nature, to be their brethren in iniquity: and often their brothers and ſiſters are eaſier inticed to ſin by a wicked brother, than drawn to God by a godly father: and if any of the other children be godly, p. 43theſe wicked ones do hate, and revile, and perſecute them like wicked Cain, who ſlew his brother becauſe his works were righteous.

3. They bring reproach upon that good Religion which their good parents profeſs and practiſe: and thus Eli's ſons made men abhor the offerings of the Lord; and with ſome the holy lives of the parents cannot wipe off the reproach which is caſt on Religion by the wickedneſs of their children.

Seventhly, The greatneſs of this affliction appears by theſe eight Aggravations of it.

1. It aggravates their grief to remember what pleaſure and delight theſe children were to them in their childhood; it torments them now to ſee their ſweet and pleaſant ſmiles, turn'd into ſcornful and diſdainful looks at their parents, and their pretty broken words turn'd into oaths and lies, and other rotten ſpeeches; and to think p. 44that theſe who once were ſo forward to claſp about their necks, and to kiſs them, and to run at their commands, do now lift up the heel againſt them.

2. It aggravates their ſorrow to ſee themſelves ſo miſerably diſappointed in their former hopes of theſe children; Hope deferred (ſaith Solomon) makes the heart ſick: but to be croſs'd and diſappointed in hopes of ſo great mercy, doth even break the heart. When theſe parents remember how pleaſant it was to them to hear theſe children liſp out their Catechiſms, and to hear their good words of God and Chriſt; it cannot but be very grievous to them, that the ſame children which they did with Hannah lend to the Lord, ſhould ſell themſelves to the devil.

3. It aggravates their ſorrow, that their children are ſo void of love to their parents, and to ſee that the company of lyars, and drunkards, and whoremongers, and thieves, is more delightful to them than the company of their parents.

p. 454. It aggravates their ſorrow to look upon the holy children of others; when they may ſay, Yonder are children that make a glad father and mother, when the children of our bodies, and counſels, and prayers, and vows, and tears, live as if their father was an Amorite, and their mother an Hittite.

5. Aggravation is, in caſe the parents have but one child, and that proves fooliſh and diſobedient: and of this there be many inſtances; the Scripture, to ſet forth the ſaddeſt kind of mourning, compares it to the mourning for an only ſon, Jer. 6.26. Make thee mourning as for an only ſon, moſt bitter lamentation. Zech. 12.10. They ſhall mourn as one that mourneth for an only ſon. I know theſe Scriptures ſpeak of parents mourning for the death of an only ſon; but it's not ſo ſad to follow an only ſon to the grave, as to ſee an only child live to the diſhonour of God, to be a curſe to his generation, and to be continually deſtroying his precious ſoul; it's a very bitter caſe, when as p. 46much love, and kindneſs, and care, and coſt, and pains, and prayers, and faſtings, are beſtowed upon one child, as other parents beſtow upon many children; and notwithſtanding all this, one child ſhould prove ſuch a monſter of wickedneſs, as if the ſins of many ungodly children met in him.

6. Aggravation. When Gods holy Miniſters are the Fathers of fools, which (I have told you) often happens: and this is a moſt dreadful caſe for ſuch who have the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and yet muſt bind over their own children to the wrath of God: ſuch know the terrors of the Lord, and the torments of Hell more than others; and therefore muſt be more affected to believe, that this at preſent is the portion of their own children.

7. Aggravation. When ſuch children whom their parents deſign'd to ſerve God in the Miniſtry of the Goſpel, do prove ungodly: this is matter of great lamentation, for the parents to intend them for the higheſt office in p. 47the Church, and give them education for that end, that theſe children ſhould make themſelves as ſalt without ſavour, which is good for nothing, but to be caſt out, and trodden under foot of men.

8. Aggravation. When children are a grief to their parents in their old age, and do as it were throw dirt upon their hoary heads, which is their crown of glory; it's the command of God, Prov. 23.22. Deſpiſe not thy mother when ſhe is old: Solomon tells us, Eccleſ. 12. That the days of old age are evil days; their very age is a troubleſome and incurable diſeaſe; now the graſhopper, every light thing is a burden to them, and therefore it muſt be more troubleſome to them to be then tormented with wicked children, when the ſtrong men (as Divines think) Solomon calls the legs, do bow themſelves, and their children who ſhould be a ſtaff and ſupport to them, do break their hearts, and cauſe their grey-hairs to go with ſorrow to the grave.

p. 48I now come to make application of this diſcourſe.

Ʋſe 1. Let ſuch parents praiſe and honour God, whom God hath bleſs'd with wiſe, and holy, and obedient children; whether by thoſe words in Pſal. 144.12. David means children accompliſh'd with natural or ſpiritual endowments, or both, I ſhall not determine; but to apply them to the caſe in hand, I ſay it's the great mercy of God to you, that when ſo many children are as noiſome weeds, your ſons ſhould be as hopeful plants grown up in their youth; and when ſo many make themſelves ugly, and deform'd with ſin, your daughters ſhould be as corner-ſtones (in which is ſeen the beauty of the building, and the art and skill of the workman) poliſhed after the ſimilitude of a palace. Do not hence conclude, that you are better parents than others, or have had more care in the education of your children than others, but aſcribe all to the free grace of God, who will p. 49have mercy upon whom he will have mercy.

2. Let none preſume to cenſure godly parents for their wicked children; To him that is afflicted, ſaith Job, pity ſhould be ſhew'd him from his friend. Have they not trouble enough already, but will you add to their affliction? They have not hereby forfeited the good thoughts and eſteem which you ſhould have of them; and if you judge them for this, ye muſt judge as wiſe and holy Saints of God as ever were in the world; though God herein doth ſharply correct them, yet he will not allow you to ſit in judgment, and to paſs ſentence upon them: I ſay to you, as Job to his friends, Hold your peace, let them alone; and leave them to ſtand or fall to their own Maſter.

3. This ſhould fill the hearts of theſe holy parents with revenge upon Sin and Satan, which have ſo p. 50debauch'd, and defiled, and deſtroy'd their dear children: If a man ſhould murder your child, a ſpirit of revenge would riſe in you, and you would ſay to ſuch a one, I will have thy life and blood for the life and blood of my child; but Sin and Satan have deſtroy'd both the precious ſoul and body of the child; therefore labour, as for other reaſons, ſo for this alſo, to be reveng'd of them: Labour to do as David did by the Lyon and the Bear, which took a Lamb out of his flock, he ſlew both the Lyon and the Bear, and delivered the Lamb; ſo do all ye can to reſeue your poor lambs out of the jaws of Satan; however labour to hate Sin and Satan more, to promote Gods honour and kingdom, and the ſalvation of ſouls more: and this is the way to be reveng'd on Sin and Satan for the ruine of your children.

p. 514. I do hence exhort all holy and obedient children to acknowledge the grace of God to them, that they are or have been the joy and crown of their parents: It is his diſtinguiſhing grace that made you to differ from all wicked children, and perhaps from ſome that came out of the ſame womb, and ſucked the ſame mothers breaſts as you did. Conſider four things which are great matter of praiſe.

1. That ye are the children of holy parents; that ye may comfortably come to God in prayer, and ſay, we are the children of thy ſervant our father; we are thy ſervants, and the children of thy handmaid our mother: bleſs God for your parents good counſels and examples, and for a great part of an age of prayers, which ye are daily receiving the benefit of; if your parents are dead, and in heaven, it p. 52may put you into a holy and ſpiritual frame to think of the graces of God that did ſhine in them.

2. That the ſame graces which dwelt in your good parents, are in you: Paul ſpeaks of it as matter of praiſe to God, that the ſame faith was in Timothy, which dwelt firſt in his Grandmother Lois, and his Mother Eunice; and the Apoſtle John rejoyced greatly, that he found the children of the elect Lady walking in truth.

3. That thou art freed from thoſe ſtings of conſcience, which graceleſs children ſhall one day feel for their diſobedience to their parents; thou mayeſt joyfully reflect, that thou waſt the joy of thy holy parents, and that their lives have been made ſweeter, and their croſſes eaſier by thee; that thou art the honour and ſeal of their holy education, when wicked children are the ſhame and reproach of their parents.

p. 534. That thou haſt a right to that rich and precious promiſe annext to the fifth Commandment, and mention'd Epheſ. 6.2, 3. So that thou may'ſt be aſſur'd that it ſhall go well with thee both in this world, and in the world to come; I do ſeriouſly profeſs, I had rather have a right to that one promiſe made to obedient children, than to the beſt eſtate and inheritance under the Sun.

I ſhall finiſh this diſcourſe,

1. In preſcribing ſome means to be us'd by thoſe that may be, or are parents, to prevent this calamity.

2. I ſhall direct thoſe parents that groan under this calamity, how to bear it.

3. I ſhall give a ſerious exhortation to ſuch children who are the grief and bitterneſs of their parents.

p. 54Firſt, I ſhall preſcribe means to be us'd to prevent this calamity.

1. Uſe all holy prudence and care in your choice of a yoke-fellow; for if ye make your ſelves the husbands or wives of fools, ye are like in time to become the fathers or mothers of fools; when before the flood, the members of Gods Church married with a wicked generation, Geneſ. 6.2. they brought forth a wicked poſterity; but to have a holy yoke-fellow, is the way to have a holy ſeed; and therefore what ye would moſt deſire to have for your ſelves, that labour to find in the perſon who is to be one fleſh with you: thou wouldſt have thy ſelf born of God; thou wouldſt have the Image of God, and the life of Chriſt in thy ſelf. Labour that theſe things be in the perſon whom thou chuſeſt for thy yoke-fellow; but never make choice of one for p. 55thy husband or wife, whom thou ſhouldſt not chuſe for thy companion.

2. Be faithful and upright with God, Prov. 20.7. The juſt man walketh in his integrity, and his children are bleſſed after him: If you would have grace and mercy for your children, love and pleaſe the God of all grace and mercy; whatever ſecret ſins are in thee, kill thoſe ſins for thy poor childrens ſake, leſt the ſins you too much harbour in your own hearts, do break out in your childrens lives: Parents may often ſee their own ſins againſt their heavenly father in their childrens diſobedience to them; when your children deſpiſe you, remember your want of honour, and fear, and reverence of God; when they vex and trouble you, remember how ye have griev'd and provoked him; when they decline your company, remember how your hearts have p. 56wandered from God in his Ordinances.

3. Bewail and beg pardon of God for your failings heretofore to your parents; for many do often reap from their own children, what they formerly ſow'd by their ſins againſt their parents; and their miſcarriages to their parents do fall upon them in the wickedneſs of their children: the beſt may ſadly reflect upon their want of due honour, and obedience, and thankfulneſs to their parents; ye may remember your peeviſh looks, undecent behaviour to them; your grieving them in quarrelling with your brethren and ſiſters; your unjuſt cenſuring them for partiality in their love to their children, and judging them to want love to you, when you were wanting in your duty to them; and many, who are now godly parents themſelves, may remember, that by greater ſins in their youth they were the grief and p. 57bitterneſs of their fathers and mothers; and therefore pray mightily to God to pardon you, and not to viſit theſe ſins upon you in the diſobedience of your children.

4. Pray to God not to viſit your ſins upon your children: When Manaſſeh was in Heaven, Amon his ſon followed the ſteps of his unconverted eſtate; and Jehoiakim was carried captive into Babylon for the ſins of Manaſſeh: Pray that your children may not be like you in any thing, wherein ye are unlike God; and that their teeth may not be ſet on edg for the ſowre grapes that ye have eaten.

5. Be deeply affected with the corruption of nature in your children: For as no man will value a Saviour for himſelf, who is not convinc'd of the ſin and miſery which he muſt be ſaved from; ſo ye muſt be ſenſible of your childrens ſins, or elſe ye cannot labour for their ſalvation. p. 58When your ſweet babes are born, ye rejoyce to find that in Gods book all their members were written; but ye ſhould alſo be ſenſible of that body of ſin they are born with, and that by nature they are young Atheiſts, and Infidels, and haters of God, and baſphemers, and whoremongers, and lyars, and thieves, and murderers; for they are naturally inclin'd to theſe and all other fins, and are by nature children of the wrath of the infinite God; and being convinc'd of this, ye will find that your chief care of them ſhould be to ſave them from this dreadful ſtate of ſin and miſery.

6. Be convinc'd what a great deal of work lies upon you to endeavour the ſalvation of your children: young children always make a great deal of work; they make work for parents, and work for ſervants, and work for all that are about them; but to ſave them from p. 59ſin and hell, is the greateſt work that belongs to their parents: for this purpoſe they have a great deal a work to do in their own hearts; they muſt know, and believe, and love, and obey the doctrine of ſalvation themſelves, that they may be able, and ſit to inſtruct their children therein; for a man cannot train up his child in the way he ſhould go, if he do not know the way himſelf: We read Deut. 6.6, 7. Theſe words ſhall be in thy heart, and thou ſhalt teach them diligently unto thy children; it's fitly render'd in the margin, thou ſhalt whet or ſharpen them; the word of God is more keen and ſharp when it hath firſt done its work on the parents hearts, and ſo comes from their hearts to their children: Parents muſt keep their own graces in exerciſe, to put authority and ſavour in all that they ſay and do for the ſalvation of their children: Grace muſt work in their p. 60prayers; grace muſt rule their tongues; grace muſt guide the rod, and grace muſt ſhine in their lives: and then it's a great work which is to be wrought in the children; it is a great work for them who are born of the fleſh, to be born of the ſpirit; a great work to make Religion and Godlineſs natural to them; to make the children of the devil to become the children of God Almighty: and parents muſt conſtantly labour in the uſe of means to accompliſh this work.

7. Be mighty in prayer for your children; for all the good ye deſire for them muſt come from God, and therefore muſt be beg'd by prayer; it is in vain for them to be taught of us, except they be taught of God; Whoſe words, Lord, (ſaith holy Auguſtine) were they but thine, which by my faithful mother thou haſt ſung in my heart. Pray, and pray in faith and hope; thy ears (ſaith Auguſtine p. 61again) were at my mothers heart, when ſhe pray'd for me; ye muſt pray with tender and melting hearts: the ſame Father tells us, that his mothers tears watered the earth when ſhe pray'd for him: and ye muſt pray for their ſalvation: this alſo Auguſtine calls the hinge of his holy mothers prayers for him.

8. Solemnly dedicate them to God by baptiſm; and then ye muſt heartily conſent that God alone be the eternal life and happineſs of you and your children, and that Jeſus Chriſt be their and your Redeemer, to redeem you and them from all ſin and miſery, and to bring both to God; and that the Holy Ghoſt be their and your Sanctifier, that by him you and they may have a Scripture-right unto, and be made meet and fit for this happineſs.

9. When they are capable of it, inſtruct them in the Covenant, which by baptiſm they were ſolemnly entered p. 62into. For this end ye muſt diligently teach them theſe ſix things:

1. To know the evil and danger of ſin; for till they come to know what ſin is, and what it is to be ſaved, or damn'd, and what it is to loſe, or enjoy God; they will not value or accept of Chriſt, but will deſpiſe the Redeemer of the World as good for nothing: ye muſt therefore labour to make ſin odious, and Chriſt precious to your children, and then they will value Chriſt, and obey you: It was propheſied of John the Baptiſt, that he was to prepare the way of the Lord, and to turn the children to the parents: ſo let it be your care to make way for Chriſt in your childrens hearts; and if ye prevail in that, they will be obedient to you.

2. Inform your ſelves and them in the doctrine of God the Father, p. 63Son, and Holy Ghoſt: for this is the doctrine whereinto they are baptized; and by baptiſm they are ſolemnly entered into Covenant with theſe ſacred perſons, againſt the fleſh, Satan, and the world: ſhew them the glory and love of God the Father in chuſing, ordaining, fitting, and ſending Jeſus Chriſt, and in commanding him to be a ſacrifice for us; inform them that God the Father is the fountain of life; for Chriſt lives by the Father: the fountain of Authority; for Chriſt received all power in heaven and earth from him: the fountain of all the Chriſtian Religion; for Chriſt firſt heard theſe truths from the Father, and then made them known to us; and the fountain of glory, for the Father hath exalted Chriſt, and all glorified Saints are the bleſſed of the Father. Labour by theſe and all other means, that God the Father have the greateſt place in your childrens p. 64hearts. Teach them to know and prize Jeſus Chriſt; without this they cannot be true Chriſtians: ſhew them all the fulneſs and glory of the Godhead in Jeſus Chriſt: Labour to make them ſee his glory as the only begotten Son of God; and all that he as Mediator and Redeemer hath done in the ſtate of his humiliation, and is doing, and will do in the ſtate of his exaltation, for the ſalvation of loſt ſinners. Labour to imprint theſe great Truths upon their hearts.

1. That it was the Will and Law of God the Father, that God the Son in our nature ſhould be a ſacrifice for our ſins: this fully appears Heb. 10.5, &c. A body haſt thou prepared, or fitted me, meaning to be a ſacrifice: and, ſaith he, Lo I come to do thy will, O God: and Pſal. 40. Thy law is in my heart; meaning that will and law of the Father, which p. 65bound him to offer and ſacrifice himſelf for our ſins.

2. That Jeſus Chriſt by his obedience to the death of the croſs, did perfectly obey and fulfil this law and will of God the Father.

3. That all ſalvation and happineſs is by the Covenant of Grace ſetled upon all, and only thoſe who believe and obey the Goſpel, only for the ſake of this ſacrifice and obedience of Jeſus Chriſt: and therefore, ſaith the Apoſtle, Heb. 10.10. By the which will we are ſanctified through the offering of the body of Chriſt once for all: that is, by Chriſts fulfilling the will of his Father, in once ſacrificing himſelf for ſinners, we and all true believers are ſanctified, that is, perfectly ſaved.

Ye muſt alſo acquaint them with the office and work of the Holy Ghoſt, which our Saviour tells us, John 16.13. is to guide or lead p. 66them into all truth; that is, to inable them to believe, and love, and obey the ſaving-truths of God reveal'd in the Goſpel: for to the end, that they may know and keep their baptiſmal-covenant, they muſt know how all the Three ſacred perſons, the Father, Son, and Holy Ghoſt are intereſted in the great work of Salvation.

3dly, Labour to convince your children of the Excellency of the Life of Religion, and obedience to God: commend this to them as the moſt honourable life; for our Saviour tells us, John 12.26. If any man ſerve me, him will my father honour. What ſhall be done to the man (ſaith Ahaſuerus) whom the king will honour? But who is able to tell what ſhall be done to the man whom the Father of our Lord Jeſus Chriſt will honour? Let them alſo know, that this is the wiſeſt life; it's Jobs inquiry, Where ſhall wiſdom be found? p. 67and, ſaith he, Job 28.28. Behold, the fear of the Lord, that is wiſdom; and to depart from evil, is underſtanding: And further, that it is the ſafeſt life, for God is a ſhield, and rock, and wall to all that obey him; and although ſuch things which they have in common with other men are expos'd to danger and loſs, yet their perſons, and their whole portion is always ſafe; and alſo, that this is the moſt gainful life, for hereby Saints gain God, and Chriſt, and Heaven, and loſe nothing; for we cannot loſe by a Saviour, who ſaves us from all evil, and brings us into the poſſeſſion of all good; and though death it ſelf ſtrips us naked of all things under the Sun, yet death is unſpeakable gain to all who live this life: and ye muſt further aſſure them, that this is the moſt pleaſant life, for it is a life of faith, and love, and praiſe, and joy, and a life of victory over ſin; and they p. 68who live this life, have all things to pleaſe them; they have God to pleaſe them; Chriſt and his Merits to pleaſe them; and a proſpect of a holy and a bleſſed Eternity to pleaſe them: ye would never be the fathers and mothers of fools, if ye could perſwade your children to be ſo wiſe, as to prize and love a life of obedience to God.

4. Commend to your children the glory and amiableneſs of the Houſe and Church of God: this is the body whereinto they are baptized; take your child with you, and go walk about Sion, and go round about her, and tell the towers thereof, and mark well her bulwarks, and conſider her palaces, as ye are taught, Pſal. 45.9. Preſent to their view King Jeſus, and at his right hand ſtanding the Queen (his Church) in gold of Ophir, Pſal. 45.9. ſay to them, as the Angel ſaid to John, Rev. 21.9. Come hither, and I will p. 69ſhew you the bride, the Lambs wife: ſhew them that glorious ſight, Rev. 12.1. The woman cloathed with the Sun, and upon her head (that bright and glorious conſtellation) a crown of twelve Stars, that ſo the company of thoſe who live in communion with God and Jeſus Chriſt, may be deſirable, and delightful to them; and that they may forſake evil company, which is often the bane of youth.

5. Teach them to eſteem aright of Gods Ordinances: for by baptiſm they are ſolemnly admitted into that houſe and family which is bleſſed with theſe, as the means of ſalvation: Labour to beget in them good thoughts of Gods Miniſters; for ye ſhall ever find, that thoſe children will deſpiſe you who make light of them: teach them to pray; ye can never have comfort in your children till they cry to God, Abba Father: teach them to know, and prize, p. 70and long for the Lords-Supper, and therein to take Chriſt and all Salvation in a little bread and wine: teach them to honour and delight in the Lords-day, as the Diamond in the ring of time; thoſe children are always the honour and joy of their godly parents, who make conſcience to keep holy the Lordsday.

6. Make them ſenſible that time is ſhort and precious, that an eternity of glory and miſery is at hand; and that death, and judgment, and heaven or hell are at the door of young children.

I ſhall further add five Directions to godly parents, to prevent this ſad calamity.

1. Labour to ſave your children from thoſe ſins which provoke God, and will deſtroy them, as well as from thoſe ſins which will alſo bring p. 71loſs and reproach upon you: ſome are ſadly affected to ſee their children given to drunkenneſs, or whoredom, or the like ſins; but are not ſo much concern'd for their unbelief, and impenitency, and want of love to God, and for their covetouſneſs; which ſhews ſuch parents to have too much of the love of the world, and too little love to God and their childrens ſouls; but we muſt take our meaſures of the evil and danger of ſin from the word of God, which tells us, 1 Cor. 6.9, 10. that the covetous, as well as drunkards and whoremongers, ſhall not inherit the kingdom of God: and this will teach parents not only to mourn over a debauch'd child, but alſo over a covetous, though he be a wealthy child.

2. Obſerve what ſins your children are moſt prone unto, and labour to fill them with revenge and hatred againſt thoſe ſins: If your p. 72child have a foot, or hand gangren'd, ye will cut off the incurable member, rather than bury your child; ſo ye ſhould do what ye can to pull out the right eye, and to cut off the right hand; and the right foot of ſin in your children, rather than ſuffer their bodies and ſouls to be caſt into Hell: As ye ſhould eſpecially kill thoſe ſins in your ſelves, which your natures are moſt inclin'd unto; ſo ye ſhould do by your children, who are ſo great a part of your ſelves: we are taught, Prov. 20.11. That even a child is known by his doing, whether his work be pure, or whether it be right: Parents may much diſcern by the manners and ways of their children in their childhood, what they are like to prove in their riper years; and therefore they muſt obſerve them, that they may encourage them in the good, and diſcourage them in the evil, which they then appear to be moſt bent unto.

p. 733. Chuſe to place your children in families of holineſs and prayer; ye will not plant your trees among briars and thorns; much leſs ſhould ye chuſe to place your children to ſerve thoſe who will not ſerve God.

4. Give them due correction: this hath God commanded to kill their ſins, and to ſave their ſouls, Prov. 23.13, 14. Withhold not correction from the child; for if thou beateſt him with the rod, he ſhall not dye: thou ſhalt beat him with the rod, and ſhalt deliver his ſoul from hell: It is better thy child be whipt, than damn'd; and let not thy childs weeping and crying under the rod move thee to withhold due correction, Prov. 19.18. Chaſten thy ſon, and let not thy ſoul ſpare for his crying: If your childs bone be out of joint, ye will have it ſet, though he cry and bawl under the hand of the Surgeon; and will ſay, It's better p. 74he cry now, than be lame ſo long as he lives; ſo it is better your children cry now under the rod of their father, than that they ſhould weep and wail for ever under the wrath of the infinite God: and therefore that ye may perform this duty, take theſe five Directions.

1. Do not allow your ſervants to correct your children; for correction is an act of authority, and therefore cannot belong to thoſe who are meerly your ſervants; I would not have parents to permit their children to deſpiſe and abuſe their ſervants; but for parents to ſuffer their ſervants to correct their children, is the way to make their children ſtubborn, their ſervants proud, and themſelves contemptible in the eyes of both.

2. Convince them that it is your duty to correct them for their ſins; and therefore it is adviſeable, that p. 75you make them get thoſe Scriptures without book, which bind you to correct them; alſo ſome of thoſe Scriptures which condemn the ſins which you correct them for, that their conſciences may juſtifie you in doing your duty; and that they may be more afraid of ſin, than the rod; and of provoking God, than offending you.

3. Correct them betimes, Prov. 13.24. and Prov. 19.18. Chaſten thy ſon while there is hope: Uſe the rod wiſely to them, before they become ſcourges and ſcorpions to you.

4. Labour to be in a good frame when you correct them, that love, and prudence, and meekneſs, and not rage and fury may govern the rod; and do not exerciſe too much ſeverity towards them, that ye may not provoke them to wrath, leſt the wrath of the children prove the grief of the parents.

p. 765. Pray to God for a bleſſing upon your correcting them, that it may be effectual to drive out that fooliſhneſs which is bound up in their hearts.

Laſtly, Be good examples to your children; let them not ſee you in any ſin, for that may infect them, and make them deſpiſe you; but let them always ſee you ſhining in the Image of God, and that is the way to make them honour, and obey you in the Lord: live ſo, that ye may ſay to them, as Paul to the Philippians, Chap. 4.9. Thoſe things which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and ſeen in us, do, and the God of love and peace ſhall be with you.

2dly, I proceed to direct thoſe parents who are under this calamity, how to bear it.