Invisibles Realities Demonstrated in the Life and Death of John Janeway, Chapter 12
CHAP. XII.
Miniſters are not to carry on low deſigns.
HE was not a little concerned about Miniſters; that, above all men, They ſhould take heed, leſt they carried on poor low deſigns, inſtead of wholly-eying of the intereſt of God, and ſouls. He judged, that, to take up Preaching as a trade, was altogether inconſiſtent with the high ſpirit of a true Goſpel-Miniſter: He deſired, that thoſe which ſeemed to be devoted to the Miniſtry, would be ſuch, firſt, heartily to devote their All to God, and then that they ſhould indeavour to have a dear love to immortal ſouls.
He was very ready to debaſe himſelf; and humbly to acknowledge, what he found amiſs in himſelf, and laboured to amend himſelf and others. This, ſaith he, I muſt ſeriouſly confeſs, that I muſt needs reproach my ſelf for deficiency in a Chriſtian ſpiritual remembrance of you (ſpeaking to a dear friend); and for a decay in a quick tender touch, as of other things, ſo of what relates to your ſelf in the ſpirituality of it. Not that I think not of you or of God; but, that my thoughts of you, and ſpiritual things, are not ſo frequent, ſavoury and affectionate, as they ought to be.
By this reflection you may eaſily perceive that I ſee further in duty than I do in practice. The truth of it is, I grudge that thoughts and affections ſhould run out any whither freely, but to God. And what I now deſire for my ſelf, I deſire for you likewiſe, that God would ſweeten the fountain, our natures I mean, that every drop flowing from thence may ſavour of ſomething of God within. Thoughts are pretious, affections are more pretious, the beſt that we are worth; and, when they flow in a wrong chanel, all Go…s pretious diſpenſations towards us are loſt; all that God hath ſpent upon us, is loſt, and ſpent in vanity. I ſpeak this, out of a dear reſpect to your ſoul, and Gods honour▪ whom, I am loth, ſhould be a loſer by his kindneſſes. I know, you have many objects, upon which you may be too apt to let out your dear affections. I ſay again my jealouſie, is leſt (there being ſo many chanels, wherein they may run) God loſe his due. I deſire therefore, in humility and tenderneſs, that this may be as a hint to you from the ſpirit of God, to look inwards to the frame and diſpoſition of your ſoul, and to make trial thereof, by the natural out-goings of your affections; and then, expoſtulate the caſe with your own ſoul. If Chriſt have my warmeſt love, why is it thus with me? If God have my heart, why am I ſo thoughtful about the world? If I indeed love him beſt, How cometh it to paſs, that I find more ſtrong delightful conſtant acting of my affections towards my Relations, my ſelf, or any worldly thing than, I do after him? O, the depth of the hearts deceitfulneſs!
Dear and Honoured Friend, truſt not a ſurmiſal, truſt not to a ſlight view of your heart, or the firſt apprehenſions you may have of your ſelf; but, go down into the ſecrets of your heart, try and fear, fear and try. An Evidence is abundantly more worth than all the trouble that you can be at, in the acquiring of it: And the trouble, that there is good ground for, in an unevidenced ſtate; is far greater than that which may ſeem to be in ſearching for it. Yea, to an awakened ſoul, what is the trouble in clearing its evidences, but their ſenſe or fear of their not being clear, and of the deceitfulneſs of their hearts. The reality of that evil, which tender ſoules ſo dread, doth lie in its full weight, (though not felt), upon the drouſie ungroundedly ſecure ſinner.
I ſpeak in love; give me leave, to remember you of ſome touches that you had formerly upon your ſpirit under the means of grace; remember, how much you were ſometimes affected under Preaching. Did you never ſay, that theſe ſermons upon hardneſs of heart, ſoftned yours? Inquire I pray, whether thoſe convictions which were then upon your heart, are not worn off, by the incumbrances of the world: If, upon inquity, you find that they are, it's high time for you to look about you, and repent, and not only to do your firſt works, but to ſtrive to outgo them.
I have vvith grief, taken a review of the frame of my ovvn ſpirit, vvhen I vvas at your houſe; and I have no ſmall ſenſe of the diſtemper of my ſoul, vvhereby I vvas betrayed to too great an indifference in the things of God: and, finding by ſad experience, that I vvas more apt (amongſt thoſe carnal comforts and affairs) to loſe that relliſh, and ſavour of divine things that I vvas vvont to have; and thoſe delightful appearances of God vvhichwhich I vvas through rich grace, acquainted with, while I was more ſequeſtred from the world and earthly delights [not, but that I find my heart at the beſt, under the higheſt advantages of cloſeſt communion too unwilling to endeavour after, and maintain that gratious ſenſe and acknowledgement of God which I would fain obtain unto]: I ſay, obſerving mine own experiences, and knowing that your heart was ſomething akin to mine, fearing leſt multiplicity of buſineſs, ſhould expoſe you alſo, to the ſame hazard; Chriſtian compaſſion could not but put me upon arming of you againſt thoſe temptations, to which your occaſions make you ſubject.
The deſire of my ſoul for you is, that you may travel ſafely through a dangerous wilderneſs, to a bleſſed Canaan; that you may quit your ſelf like a Chriſtian in the oppoſing and conquering all your enemies; and, at laſt, come triumphing out of the field, and that you may behave your ſelf like a Pilgrim and ſtranger in a far Country, who are looking for a City that hath foundations; and that we may meet together with joy at our Fathers houſe, and ſit down with him in eternal glory. O that word glory is ſo weighty, if we did believe it, that it would make the greateſt diligence we can uſe to ſecure it ſeem light. O that far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory! O for more faith! Lord, increaſe our faith and then there would be no thing wanting to make us put forth the utmoſt ſtrength of our ſoul, and to improve every moment of time, to catch hold of all advantages and to make uſe of all means poſſible for the attainment of ſuch glorious ends.
But, O theſe unbelieving hearts! let us join our complaints and let us all break forth into bitter lamentations over them. May not we with as good reaſon, as that diſtreſſed Father over his poſſeſſed Child, bring our hearts into the preſence of our Saviour, and cry out with tears, and ſay that it is theſe unbelieving hearts, which ſometimes caſt us into the fire, and ſometimes into the water: yea, worſe, every time we forſake God, and prefer any thing before him, we part with life for death, with Heaven for Hell.
Give me leave to come yet a little nearer to you: What an advantage would a full perſwaſion of the truth and excellency of Goſpel diſcoveries, bring to your ſoul, if you would but ſeriouſly, and with all your ſtrength, drive on true ſpiritual deſigns. O, how eaſily might you then go under all your burdens. If your care for the things of this world were but rightly ſubordinate to the things of eternity how chearfully might you go on with your buſineſs! If you ſought firſt the Kingdom of Heaven and the righteouſneſs thereof: then all other things would be added (ſo far as they are neceſſary or good for you),
Let me therefore at this time put you upon that duty of raiſing your mind from Earth to Heaven, from the Creature to the Creator, from the VVorld to God. Indeed, it is a matter of no ſmall difficulty, to diſcover that diſorder that is in our ſouls, when we are ſolicitous about temporary objects and imployments: But, there are but few ſurer diſcoveries of it, than inſenſibility and not complaining of it. For, when the ſoul is indeed raiſed to ſpiritual objects, and to underſtand clearly its eternal intereſt; when it doth in good earneſt, take God for its portion, and prefer him above all, then it will quickly be ſenſible of the ſouls outgoings after other objects, and even grudge that any time ſhould be taken up in the purſuit of the creature, and that any below God ſhould be followed with earneſt pleaſure and conſtancy. It would have God have the beſt, and it would do nothing elſe but love, ſerve and injoy God. For my own part I cannot but wonder that God will give us leave to love him. O bleſſed goodneſs, O infinite condeſcenſion! Thoſe that believingly ſeek him he is not aſhamed to be called their God. I am ſenſible in ſome meaſure of your burdens, and indeed that muſt needs be a burden that keeps the ſoul from purſuing its chiefeſt good. My prayers for you are that you may have ſuch teachings from God as may make you underſtand how far heavenly things are more pretious than earthly, and that you may with all your might ſeek, mind and love that which hath moſt of true excellency in it, which hath the only ground of real comfort here and of eternal happineſs hereafter.