Exposition of Job, Exposition of Job · Chapter 19 · Verses 13-14
Verſ. 13. He hath put my brethren far from me, and mine acquaintance are verily eſtranged from me.
14. My kinsfolk have failed, and my familiar friends have forgotten me.
From this, to v. 20. we have the Seventh proof and inſtance of his miſery; Namely, That while he is thus afflicted, he is diſerted of Friends, Servants, his Wife; and moſt intimate familiars, and deſpiſed by others. This inſtance is deduced in a large complaint, and may be taken up in five Branches. The firſt whereof (in theſe verſes) is, That all his Friends, Kindred and Acquaintance, had deſerted him. Theſe here mentioned under the names of Brethren, Acquaintance, Kinsfolk, and familiar Friends, muſt be diſtinguiſhed from thoſe moſt intimate boſom Friends, of whom he complains, v. 19. and are the ſame with thoſe who returned to him when God ſmiled upon him, Chap. 42.11. And under thoſe various names are comprehended his Relations in the fleſh, and his Neighbours and Acquaintance, who took notice of him before, and with whom he entertained familiarity and neighbourly intercourſe. Theſe he declares were far, and eſtranged from him, did fail and had forgotten him. That is, they withdrew from him, and failed him in his ſtrait, and took no more notice of him than if he had been a ſtranger, or one forgotten among them. It ſeems from Chap. 42.11. that they had not come at him in his diſtreſs, or if they did, they carried ſtrangely toward him, forgetting his former condition, and what familiarity had been among them. And, to add to all this, he declares they were verily, or, only, thus eſtranged from him, v. —13. that is, they were altogether ſo, and really ſo, and not in his apprehenſion only. From all this, Learn,
1. Piety doth allow men to make uſe of, and entertain familiarity and converſe with, natural Relations, and other Neighbours and Acquaintances; For Job entertained ſuch. Piety doth not teach men to be without natural affections, Rom. 1.31. with 2 Tim. 3.2, 3, &c. nor yet to be ſelfiſh, inſociable and wild creatures. For grace doth ſanctifie, and not deſtroy Nature. And gracious men ſhould labour to commend and inſinuate Piety to others, by taking notice of them and converſing with them.
2. Thoſe Relations among men do import obligations unto duties, according as any need them; For, Job, by his complaint, inſinuates, that Brethren and Acquaintance, &c. ſhould not be far off, not fail, or be forgetful and ſtrange, when any they have relation unto are in trouble, and need their help. A friend ought to love at all times, and a Brother is born for adverſity, Prov. 17.17. And men are to look how they acquit themſelves of their bonds of Relation and friendſhip, in ſuch caſes; leſt it be ſaid to them, as Abſolom ſaid to Huſhai, Is this thy kindneſs to thy friend? 2 Sam. 16.17.
3. It oft-times falls but that men, and eſpecially Saints, are deſerted of their Friends, Relations and Acquaintance, when they come to be in trouble; For, ſo Job found in his experience, and David, Pſal. 31.11, 12. & 38.11. and elſewhere, ſee Prov 14.20. If men try upon what they ground their friendſhip, it will be found that few are real freinds to the men, or their vertues, whom they pretend to affect; but only to their proſperity; and that there are few ſuch friends as Jonathan was to David. And though men may pretend otherwiſe; yet adverſity (which is the Touchſtone of friendſhip) will diſcover the truth. Therefore we ſhould lean upon our Kindred, Friends and Acquaintance, as a very uncertain prop. And when we are deſerted by them, we ſhould conſider that this hath been the lot of Saints before us, and ſhould learn to truſt in God, who is a friend that never fails, fail us who will, Pſal. 27.10.
4. To be deſerted of friends under trouble is a great addition to the tryal; For, Job here complains of it as a part of his exerciſe. And no wonder; for this deprives afflicted men of that help and comfort, countenance and counſel, which might be expected from friends, and which will be much needed in tryal. This ſhews how great their guilt is who are wanting in that duty to the afflicted.
5. While he ſaith, they are, verily, or, only eſtranged, it imports,
1. That the reality of this their unkindneſs made it ſad: Apprehenſions of ſuch a thing are ſad enough; yet, it is an caſe when we conſider that they are, or may be, but apprehenſions: But when we find we do not miſtake, but our condition is ſuch as we apprehend it, is cannot but ſink the deeper upon our ſpirits.
2. That afflicted men, by reaſon of their diſtempers, are ready to miſtake their friends; and therefore they ſhould try if things be verily and really ſo as they judge, as Job imports he had done, ſo that he can certainly conclude they were verily eſtranged.
3. That this aptitude in afflicted men to miſtake ſhould put others upon their guard, that they do not ſo much (if it be poſſible) as ſeem to grieve them; much more ſhould they be careful that they do not verily ſo; as Job complains of thoſe.
4. That a fit of unfriendlineſs is nothing ſo ſad, as when men conſtantly perſiſt therein, and do only, and altogether ſo; as Job complains they did.
Doct. 6. The beſt ſight of ſuch a tryal, and the beſt way to get the right uſe of it, is, to ſee God doing all this; For, ſo doth Job here, He hath put my Brethren far from me. For,
1. This quickens the tryal, and helps it to work, when we ſee a Supreme hand in it.
2. Saints, ſeeing God in ſuch a tryal, will ſee alſo that his end in it is but to try them; and that therefore they ſhould look well how they bear it, when God puts them in the furnace, and on the ſtage, to give proof of what is within them.
3. They will alſo ſee, that a compendious way to get an iſſue in ſuch a tryal, is, to wait on God that he may ſhew mercy, and then the bowels of all others (as it may be needful) will be looſed upon them; as Job found, Chap. 42.7, 10. with 11. See Jer. 42.12.
4. They may alſo ſee, in ſome caſes, that God turns off falſe friends from the godly, not only for their tryal, but for bringing about the ruine of theſe friends; Thus was it with Egypt, after they degenerated from their wonted kindneſs to Iſrael, Pſal. 105.25, 26, 27, 28, &c. and with many other falſe friends to that people.