Exposition of Job, Exposition of Job · Chapter 19 · Verse 17 – Verse 18
Verſ. 17. My breath is ſtrange to my wife, though I entreated for the childrens ſake of mine own body.
The Third Branch of this complaint and inſtance, is, That he had yet a ſorer tryal within his own houſe, from his own wife, who was either an ungodly woman, or wonderfully carried away by her corruptions in this tryal of her husband. For as ſhe had given him a wicked counſel in the beginning of the tryal, Chap. 2.9. So, in the progreſs of it, ſhe did deſert and would not own him, but accounted his breath and ſavour ſtrange and ſtinking, by reaſon of his ulcerous ſores, and, it may be alſo, ſome inward putrefaction in his body. And ſhe continued in this temper, notwithſtanding all his intreaties, and his obteſting of her by the remembrance of their Children, the common pledges of their love and conjugal affection.
Doct. 1. Saints muſt reſolve to meet, not only with common, but, moſt ſingular tryals; For, Job had tryals not only from his ſervants, but from the very wife of his boſom. He had leſſer tryals, but as a preparation for a greater. The ſtrength of Gods grace in Saints would not appear, nor would they be fitted for the ſingular proofs of his love, without theſe; neither would humbling weakneſs be diſcovered, without ſuch a furnace. And they ought to ſtoop to Sovereignty, in faſtening tryals upon all then enjoyments.
2. Marriage ſociety is one of the moſt ſpecial of outward croſſes, or bleſſings; As Job here findeth it ſad. And he ſubjoyns it to the reſt formerly mentioned, as ſadder than they, and to expreſs his grief that where, in reaſon, he might have expected a ſpecial comfort, he ſhould find a ſingular croſs. They little mind this, who do not eye God in their choice, and do not depend on God for a bleſſing upon that eſtate of life.
3. It may be the lot of very godly men, to find very heavy afflictions in their matches; As Job, a godly man, found this ſad croſs in his marriage, once and again. So Moſes with Zipporah, David with Michal. Some get a meet chaſtiſement of their folly (to which the godly alſo may be obnoxious) in the matter of their marriage; and (howeuer it be as to that) godly men get a conſtant tryal and exerciſe of their graces, by ſuch matches. And withal, this may be a document, that example and good company will not always prevail with people.
4. Marriage affection ſhould digeſt many infirmities in the married parties, and obligeth them to go neareſt, and have moſt ſpecial care one of another, in their trouble: For, It is implyed here, as her fault, that his breath was ſtrange to her, or, that ſhe loathed him becauſe of his infirmities. Parties ſhould marry each other with an eye to this, that they may be infirm; and that they are appointed to be helpers in ſuch caſes.
5. Where God hath his own Children to try (and eſpecially, when, in ſuch a caſe, they are joyned to thoſe who either are without grace, or have ſtrong corruptions) no ties or Bonds, and no Arguments they can uſe with Relations, will hold off a croſs from them; For, albeit ſhe was his wife, and he intreated her, by the ſtrongeſt Argument he could uſe, yet ſhe perſeveres in her ill temper. If perſons be either graceleſs, or entertain ſtrong corruptions, they are not to be leaned to in a day of tryal; and eſpecially, if they live under good means (as ſhe did in his family) and are not bettered. And before a man want a needful tryal, the very wife of his boſom will be a tryal, Mic. 7.5, 6.
6. Whatever be the undutifulneſs of Relations, particularly in marriage Society; Yet, it is the duty of the godly to keep within their bounds: For, though he handled her more roughly in what concerned God, Chap. 2.10. Yet in his complaint of her miſcarriage toward him, he declares he only intreated, and dealt lovingly with her, as became a husband to do to his wife.
7. Albeit Gods inſtitution of marriage, and his command, do tie man and wife to the mutual duties of love and tenderneſs; yet, Iſſue and Children are notable pledges and bonds of matrimonial affection, and ſhould be improved as ſuch; For, he preſſed a ſtrong Argument to reclaim her to her duty; when he entreated her for the Childrens ſake of his own body. This implyeth that love betwixt married perſons ſhould be growing daily (for he ſuppoſeth it ſhould be heightened by thoſe means) and cheriſhed by every proof of love they get in their marriage ſociety, particularly, by Gods giving them Children; For which end, they ſhould be devoted to God, that they may be bleſſed to them, for that, as for other ends. And where married perſons want Children, they ſhould ſeek after the more of God, which will not only make up that want, but will keep faſt the bonds of marriage affection without them.
Verſ. 18. Yea, young children deſpiſed me; I aroſe, and they ſpake againſt me.
The Fourth Branch of this complaint and inſtance, is, That very young ones, who before reſpected him, did now follow the croud in deſpiſing him. And albeit he ſtood up, to reprove and daſh them, yet to his face they perſiſted to ſpeak diſdainfully to him.
Doct. 1. It is the duty of younger perſons to reverence the aged, eſpecially if they be alſo honourable for dignity; For, the want of this is complained of as a grievance, young Children deſpiſed me. See Lev. 19.32.
2. As honour and reſpect among men is empty in it ſelf, ſo it is very inconſtant and little to be leaned to; For, ſo Job ſound it, when very young Children withdrew their reſpect from him, who had been reverenced by all, Chap. 29.7, 8, 9, &c. Greatneſs is but a lie, Pſal 62.9. And if men either hunt ſinfully after reſpect, or lean much to it, they are in a dangerous Errour. For it is but one of the paſſing ſhews of the world.
3. Young ones are very apt to follow the ill example they ſee; For, when elder perſons, within and without doors, had ſleighted Job, it is added, Yea, young Children deſpiſed me. For this cauſe young Children were torn by Bears for mocking the Prophet, as they had learned to do from their Parents and others in Bethel, that neſt of Idolatry, 2 King. 2.23, 24. Therefore Parents had need to ſee to their Children, what example they give, or ſuffer to be given them.
4. The looking to Inſtruments imployed in a tryal adds, oft-times, to the bitterneſs of it; For, ſo Job reſents here, that yea, or even young Children deſpiſed him, So Chap. 30.12, &c. Pſal. 35.15, 16. & 69.12. But we muſt ſtoop, and conſider that the imploying of ſuch Inſtruments is a part of our tryal, wherein we ſhould look to God; and that thoſe irritations of our corruptions are the touchſtone of our humility. Neither is it enough to have ſomewhat to ſay againſt the Inſtruments of our trouble, if we mind not the Soveraign hand of God in it, nor learn the leſſons he teacheth thereby.
5. Our endeavours, or exerciſe of any power or authority we have, will not eaſe, but rather add to, our tryal, till God come and interpoſe; For, his ariſing, and engaging to compeſce them, did not hinder them to ſpeak againſt him, but made their perſiſting to ſpeak more bitter, than if he had altogether ſleighted them. I aroſe (ſaith he, adding to the former, that they deſpiſed him) and yet they ſpake againſt me. It is ſafe to ſleight many ſuch irritations, and when ever we are called to uſe means for our own relief, and they ſucceed not, we ought to ſilence our own hearts with this, that our tryal is not yet ended.