The Young Mans Guide, Chapter 26
CHAP. XXVI. Sheweth wherein a peaceable Disposition consisteth.
I. BE peaceable towards all. Rom. 12. 18. If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Those two phrases, if it …e possible; and, as much as lieth in you, though they may seem limitations of the duty, yet they are also amplifications thereof: and shew, that there must be nothing wanting in our endeavours▪, but our utmost ability must be put forth in following after peace. A peaceable Disposition consisteth in these eight things.
1. In a backwardness to give offence unto others. A man of a peaceable disposition will forbear all provoking language, and carriage, or whatsoever may stir up others unto wrath. I confess too many Young Men are like unto the troubled Sea, continually casting forth the foam of passion and fury: but he who hath peace in his heart, will shew it in his words and actions.
2. In an unaptness to take offence when given, well knowing, that it is the sudden taking an offence that doth occasion strife and contention, rather than the giving it; as it is the second blow that makes the fray. Many out of their pride think it a point of …aseness, ignominy, and disgrace, to put up the least wrong: But Solomon saith, Prov. 19. 11. It is the glory of a man to pass over an offence, taking little notice thereof, and putting the best interpretation on it. If God were strict to mark what we do amiss, what would became of us? God indeed is strict to mark what we do well: if there be any little good in the midst of manifold imperfections, Gods way is to pass by the imperfections, and take notice of the good.
O Young Man, if thou wouldst behave thy self as a Child of God, and a Son of Peace, be not strict in observing every petty injury, and offence done unto thee; but rather pass them by, taking no notice of them.
3. In a forwardness to be reconciled unto those who have wronged thee. I have read that there was sometime a variance between two Famous Philosophers, Aristippus, and Aeschines; Aristippus at length goeth to Aeschines, and seeks for Peace and Reconciliation; and withal said, Remember, though I am the Elder, yet I first sought for peace. True, said Aeschines, and for this I will ever acknowledge you the Worthier Man; for I began the strise, but you the peace.
But, O Young Men, how many of you come far short of Aristippus, (though an Heathen Philosopher) in this particular, thinking it no disgrace to break the Peace, but a disgrace to seek it? Forgetting how Abraham humbled himself so far, as to go to Lot for Peace and Reconciliation: the Superiour to the Inferiour, though the injury done was on Lot's part, and not on Abraham's.
Surely whosoever will be the Children of Abraham, must sollow the steps of their Father Abraham; and though elder in years, and greater in place, yet go first to their Brothers for peace and reconciliation. Yea, herein we shall imitate God, and thereby shew our selves the Children of our Heavenly Father, who first seeks unto us who have grievously sinned and trespassed against him. Alas! if God had not began with us, when should we have sought to him? we should have stood out with him to all Eternity. Now is it the honour of God to begin with us poor Creatures? And is it not the honour of a Creature to begin reconciliation with his Fellow-creature.
4. In a willingness to part with thy right for peace sake. When men stand upon terms of extream right, there peace is usually broken, and contentions are ingendred, The World may count this an Effeminate softness, but it is the truest prudence. I deny not, but a man of a peaceable disposition may with a good Conscience seek to recover his own by Law, provided that it be not for every small, trifling matter, and without all private revenge, and inward hatred, and after all amicable means and remedies have been used. For the Law is to be used only as Physick for those diseases, which cannot otherwise be cured.
5. In a patient bearing the wrongs and injuries of others done unto thee. Matth. 5. 19. saith our Saviour, Resist not evil; but whosoever shall smite thee on the right Cheek, turn to him the other also, &c. which words are not to be understood simply, and litterally, but comparatively; as if he had said, Rather than revenge thy self, by rising up against him that hath smitten thee on the right Cheek, turn to him the other also; that is, be more ready to receive another wrong, than retaliate the former; ra…her than thou shouldst revenge thy self of a small injury, be ready to receive a greater.
Neither is this exposition of our Saviour to be applied only to real blows, to smiting by the hand, but also by the tongue, to the suffering of reproaches: as if he had said, If a man shall speak disgracefully and reproachfully of thee, be so far from casting dirt in his face, by reproaching and reviling him again, as rather be ready to receive and bear greater reproaches and disgraces.
6. In a willingness to forgive the wrongs and injuries of others offered unto us; wherein we are like unto God in one of those Excellencies whereof himself glorieth. For in Exod. 34. 7. where we have an enumeration of the Names of God wherein he glorieth; this is one, Forgiving iniquities, transgressions, and sins. They therefore that forgive the wrongs and trespasses of others done unto them, shew themselves like unto God in this his Excellency.
Besides, our forgiving the trespasses of our Neighbours committed against us, is made the condition of Gods forgiving of us. Forgive, and ye shall be forgiven, Luk. 6. 37. And if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. A dreadful word to all such who are of implacable spirits, who will revenge their wrongs, but will not remit them. Wouldst thou not be forgiven? wouldst thou not that God should revenge upon thee the wrongs thou hast done him? O tremble; he will certainly do it, he will not forgive thee, unless thou forgive thy Brother. Take heed what thou dost man, retain not revenge, no nor ill will in thine heart; for 'tis a vain thing to say, I forgive, whilest thou malignest in thy heart, and retainest a grudge within thee. Thou never forgivest till thou forget also, so far forth as never to remember thy Brothers wronging of thee to his prejudice. This is the forgiveness thou wouldst have from God, that he remember thy sins no more: And this is the forgiveness that God expects from thee to thy Brother; and so he expects it, that thou art at this point, either forgive, or thou shalt never be forgiven; either forget thy Brothers trespasses, or God will remember thine.
7. In a readiness to do what good Offices of love and kindness we can unto those who have wronged us. For which we have the Command of Christ, Matth. 5. 44. But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them who hate you. It is not sufficient to speak friendly and peaceably, but we must shew our peaceable disposition, by doing good unto those who have wronged us. To requite good for good is civil courtesie; to requite evil for evil is malicious policy; to requite evil for good is hateful ingratitude; but to requite good for evil is true Christian Charity, which goeth beyond all the Heathenish love in the World. This is a Lesson hard to flesh and blood, but the more difficult it is to nature, the more earnest should be our endeavour, and the more comfortable will be our practice.
8. In a forwardness to make peace between others, who are at variance. This is accounted by many worldly Politicians a thankless Office, because they may incur the displeasure, and lose the friendship of both Parties. But what if thou shouldst lose the frendship of one or two men, yet by doing thy duty to thy Neighbour, thou shalt gain the favour of God, which will abundantly recompence the loss of any mans Friendship.
Besides, though it should prove a thankless work, yet there is a blessing promised thereunto: Mat. 5. 9. Blessed are the Peace-makers, for they shall be called the Children of God; that is, they shall attain to this Priviledge and Prerogative, to be the Children of God. And saith the Apostle, James 3. 18. The fruit of Righteousness is sown in peace, of them that make peace; that is, such as make peace between others, do sow the seeds which afterwards will yield sheaves of comfort into their bosoms. Yea, by labouring to make peace, they sow the seed of everlasting reward, which afterwards they shall receive. So that the glorious rewards which follow this duty, do abundantly recompence the inconveniencies and mischiefs which sometimes accompany the same.