The Cause and Cure of a Wounded Conscience, Dialogue 14
XIV. Dialogue. Comfortable meditations for wounded Consciences to muse upon.
Tim.
Furnish me I pray with some comfortable meditations; whereon I may busie and imploy my soule when alone.
Phil.
First consider that our Saviour had not only a notionall, but an experimentall and meritorious knowledge of the paines of a wounded conscience, when hanging on the Crosse: If Pau… conce…ved himselfe happy being to answer for himself, before King Agrippa, especially because he knew * Acts 26. 2him to be expert in all the customes and questions of the Jewes; How much more just cause hath thy wounded conscience of comfort and joy, being in thy prayers to plead before Christ himself, who hath felt thy pain, and deserved that in due time by his stripes thou shouldst be healed?
Tim.
Proceed I pray in this comfortable subject.
Phil.
Secondly, consider that herein, like Eliah, thou needest not complaine that thou art left alone, seeing the best of Gods Saints in all ages have smarted in the same kind; instance in David: Indeed sometimes he boasteth duplicate page duplicate page how he lay in green *Psa. 23. 2pastures, and was led by still waters; But after he bemoaneth that he sinks in *Psa. 69. 2.deepe mire, where there was no standing. What is become of those greene pastures? Parched up with the drowth. Where are those still waters? Troubled with the tempest of affliction. The same David compareth himselfe to an*Compare P…al. 102. 6 with Psa. 102. 5. owle, and in the next Psalme resembleth himselfe to an Eagle. Doe two fowles flie of more different kind? The one the Scorne, the other the Soveraigne; the one the slowest, the other the swiftest; the one the most sharp sighted, the other the most dimme-eyed of all Birds. Wonder not then, to find in thy selfe sudden, and strange alterations. It fared thus with all Gods servants, in their agonies of temptation, and be confident thereof, though now run aground, with griefe, in due time thou shalt be all afloate with comfort.
Tim.
I am loath to interrupt you in so welcome a discourse.
Phil.
Thirdly, consider, that thou hast had, though not grace enough to cure thee, yet enough to keep thee, and conclude that he, whose goodnesse hath so long held thy head above water from drowning, will at last bring thy whole body safely to the shoare. The Wife of Manoah, had more faith then her husband, and thus she reasoned; *Judg. 13. 23.If the Lord were pleased to kill us he would not have received a burnt and a meat offering at our hands. Thou mayst argue in like manner: If God had intended finally to forsake me, he would never so often have heard and accepted my prayers, in such a measure as to vouchsafe unto me, though not full deliverance from, free preservation in my affliction. Know God hath done great things for thee already, and thou mayst conclude from his grace of supportation hitherto, grace of ease, and relaxation hereafter.
Tim.
It is pitty to disturb you, proceed.
Phil.
Fourthly, consider, that besides the private stock of thy owne, thou tradest on the publick store of all good mens prayers, put up to heaven for thee. What a mixture of Languages met in Hierusalem at Pentecost, *Acts 2.Parthians, Medes, and Elamites, &c. But conceive to thy comfort, what a medley of prayers, in severall tongues daily, center themselves in Gods eares in thy behalfe, English, Scotch, Irish, French, Dutch, &c. insomuch, that perchance thou dost not understand one syllable of their prayers, by whom thou mayst reap benefit.
Tim.
Is it not requisite to intitle me to the profit of other mens prayers, that I particularly know their persons which pray for me?
Phil.
Not at all, no more then it is needfull that the eye or face must see the backward parts, which is difficult, or the inward parts of the body, which is impossible; without which sight, by sympathie they serve one another. And such is the correspondency by prayers, betwixt the mysticall members of Christs body, corporally unseen one by another.
Tim.
Proceed to a fift Meditation.
Phil.
Consider, there be five kinds of Consciences on foot in the world: First, an ignorant conscience, which neither sees nor saith any thing, neither beholds the sinnes in a soule, nor reproves them. Secondly, the flattering conscience, whose speech is worse then silence it selfe, which though seeing sin, sooths men in the committing thereof. Thirdly, the seared conscience, which hath neither sight, speech, nor sense, in men that ar… *Ephes. 4. 19.past feeling. Fourthly, a wounded conscience, frighted with sinne. The last, and best, is a quiet, and cleare conscience, pacified in Christ Jesus. Of these the fourth is thy case, incomparably better then the three former, so that a wise man would not take a world to change with them. Yea a wounded conscience is rather painfull then sinfull, an affliction, no offence, and is in the ready way, at the next remove, to be turned into a quiet conscience.
Tim.
I hearken unto you with attention and comfort.
Phil.
Lastly, consider the good effects of a wounded conscience, privative for the present, and positive for the future. First, primative, this heavinesse of thy heart (for the time being) is a bridle to thy soule, keeping it from many sinnes it would otherwise commit. Thou that now sittest sad in thy shop, or walkest p…sive in thy Parlour, or standest sighing in thy chamber, or lyest sobbing on thy bed, mightest perchance at the same time be drunke, or wanton, or worse, if not restrained by this affliction. God saith in his Prophet to Judah, *Hos. 2. 6.I will …edge thy way with thornes, namely, to keep Judah from committing spirituall fornication. It is confest that a wounded conscience, for the time, is a hedge of thornes, (as the messenger of Satan, sent to buffet S. Paul, is termed a *2 Cor. 12 7.thorne in the flesh.) But this thornie fence keeps our wild spirits in the true way, which otherwise would be stragling: and it is better to be held in the right road with bryars and brambles, then to wander on beds of roses, in a wrong path, which leadeth to destruction.
Tim.
What are the positive benefits of a wounded conscience?
Phil.
Thereby the graces in thy soule will be proved, approved, improved. Oh how cleare will thy Sun-shine be, when this cloud is blowne over? And here I can hardly hold from envying thy happinesse hereafter. O that I might have thy future Crowne, without thy present Crosse; thy Triumphs, without thy Tryall; thy Conquest, without thy Combat! But I recall my wish, as impossible, seeing what God hath joyned together, no man can put asunder. These things are so twisted together, I must have both or neither.