The Unfortunate Politician, Part 1
The first Booke.
1. ALexius Comnenus, onlyAn. Dom. 1179. Son of Manuel Comnenus, succeeded his Father in the Empire of Constantinople. A child hee was in Age & Judgment: of wit, too short to measure an honorable sport, but lost himselfe in low delights. Hee hated a booke, more then a monster did a looking-glasse, and when his Tutor indeavored to play him into Schollership, by presenting pleasant Authors unto him, hee returned, that learning was beneath theAn. Dom. 1179 Greatnesse of a Prince, who, if wanting it, might borrow it from his subjects, being better stor'd; for (saith hee) if they will not lend mee their braines, Ile take away their heads. Yea he allowed no other Librarie, then a full stor'd Cellar, resembling the Butts to Folioes. Barrells to Quartoes, smaller Runlets, to lesser Volumns, and studied away his time, with base Company, in such debauchednesse.
2. Leave wee Alexius drowning his Care, or rather carelesnesse in wine, to behold Zene his mother the Regent Empresse. Surfeting also in pleasure with her husband Proto-sebastus, who had married her, Since the decease of Manuel her late husband. This Proto-sebastus a better Stallion, then warre-horse, was a perfect Epicure, (so that Apitius, in comparison of him, was a Churle to starve himselfe,)An. Dom. 1179 better at his palat, then his tōgue, yet better at his tongue, then his Armes, being a notorious Coward. He, with the Empresse, conspired to the dissolute Education of young Alexius, keeping him in constant ignorance of himself, their strength consisting in his weakenesse, who had he been bred to understand his owne power, might probably have curb'd their exorbitances.
3. The Bodie of the Grecian State, at this time, must needs be strāgely distempered, under such heads. Preferment was only scattered amongst Parasites, for them to scramble for it. The Court had as many Factions, as Lords, save that all their divisions united themselves in a generall vitiousnesse; and that Theodorus the Patriarh, was scoffed at by all as an antick for using Goodneesse, when it was out of fashion and was adjudged impudent, forAn. Dom. 1179. presuming to be pious alone by himselfe.
4. As for the City of Constantinople, the chief seate of the Grecian Empire; she had enjoyed happinesse so long, that now she pleaded Prescription for prosperity. Because living in Peace Time out of mind, she conceived it, rather a wrong, to have constant Quiet denied, than a favour, from Heaven, to have it continued vntounto her. Indeed, Shee was grown sicke, of a Surfet of health, and afterwards was broken, with having too much Riches. For instead of honest industrie, & painfull thrift, which first caused the greatnes of this City: now flowing with wealth, there was nothing therein, but the swelling of Pride, the boiling of lust, the fretting of Envie, and the squeezing of Oppression. So that should their dead Auncestours arise, they would be puzzl'd to see Constantinople for it felfe, exceptAn. Dom. 1179. they were directed there unto, by the Ruines of St. Sophies Temple. True it was, some years since, upon agreat famine, some hopes were given of a generall Amendment. During which time, Riot began to grow thrifty, pride to goe plaine, Gluttons to fast, and wantons were starv'd into Temperance. But forced Reformation will last no longer, then the violent cause thereof doth Continue. For soon after, when plenty was again restord, they relapsed to their former Badnesse; yea afterwards became fouler for the Purge, and more wanton for the Rod, when it was Removed.
5. Now there was an Antifashion in the Grecian Empire, maintained by some Lords of antient Extraction, who were highly offended at the great Power whch Proto-Sebastus, and L. Xene the Empresse usurped to themselves; and meeting privatly together,An. Dom. 1179. Andronicus Lapardas, as prolocutor for the rest, vented his discontentment. Complaining, it was more then high time, that they now awake out of the Lethargie of Security, into which, by fooles lullabyes, they had cousened themselves. That they in the Empire, which have most at the Stake, are made only lookers on; sometimes admitted to the Counsell, out of Complement, and for Countenance barely to concurre; but for the maine kept in Ignorance of most materiall passages. That their names are all branded for Death, and that no love to their persons, but fear what might follow, had hitherto secured their lives. In a word; that they must speedily resolve on some projects for their protection, or else they should approve themselves heirs to Epimetheus, who is not found to have left any Land unto his Sonnes,An. Dom. 1179. but only to have bequeathed an uselesse Sorrow unto them, for their Portion.
Hereupon they entred into a strict Combination with themselves secretly, vowing that they would improve their utmost might to bring in Andronicus Comnenus, a Prince of the bloud, one of great parts and abilities, (but lately banished out of the Empire) to counterpoise the power of Proto-Sebastus, and to free young Alexius from the wardship of such as abused him. We wil present the Reader with a list of their Titles and offices, who were ingaged in this designe; intreating him not to be offended with us, because of the hardnesse and length of their Names; but rather with their God-fathers who Christened them. We have an English Proverbe that bones bring meat to Town, and those who are desirousAn. Dom. 1179. to feast themselves on the pleasant & profitable passages of Historie, must bee content some time to stoope their stomacks to feed on hard words, which bring matter along with them.
7.
First, Maria Prophyrogenita Caesarissa daughter to Manuel the late Emperour, by a former wife, halfe sister to Alexius the young Emperour.
2. Caesar her Husband, an Italian Lord, who was so overtopt with the high birth, and spirit of his wife, that in this Historie we find him not grown much above the bare mention of his Name.
3. Conto-Stephanus, the Great Duke, Admirall of the Galleys.
4. Camaterus Basilius President of the City.
5. Hagiochristophorites Stephanus, Captaine of the Guard.An. Dom. 1179.
6. Disypatus Georgius Lecturer in the great Church, (an higher office, then the moderne acceptation of the word doth imply.)
7. Tripsycus Constantinus one of the most noble extractions.
8. Macroducas Constantinus, no whit inferiour to him in pedegree, or power.
9. Andronicus Lapardas, formerly mentioned, together with the aforesaid
10. Theodorus, the Patriark, last named, because least interessed. For in matters of piety, hee was governed by his conscience, but in matters of Policy, by good Company▪ being therein himselfe utterly unskilled: and strangers in unknowne waies commonly follow the most beaten Tract of others before them. All these joyn'dAn. Dom. 1179. in a league to bring Andronicus home to Constantinople, who, what he was, and how qualified, we will not forestall the Reader, conceiving it, though something painefull, yet more healthfull for him to gaine his Character by degrees in the Sequell of his Actions, wherein he will sufficiently discover himselfe, without our description of him.
8. Now Maria Caesarissa was imployed unto Andronicus (having ability in her selfe, and advantage by her Sex for the cunning carriage of the matter) to acquaint him with their designes. She comming to Oenaeum, where he liv'd in Banishment, informed him of the generall discontent in the Grecian Empire: And how those which basely served Xene, did only command in the State. That, besides those great persons,An. Dom. 1179. (whose names she presented in writing) many others (as yet scrupulous Newters) would have their doubtes fully satisfied, and declare on his side when they saw him appeare with a powerfull Army. That it would be a meritorious worke to enfranchise his Kinsman Alexius from their slavery, where-under he, and the Grecian Empire did grone.
9. Welcom was this Invitation to Andronicus, to be requested to doe, what of himselfe he desired. How willingly doth the fire fly upwards, especially when employed to fill up a vacuity; because then doing 3. good Offices, with one motion; Namely, expressing its Dutifulnesse to the Dictates of Dame Nature; and contributing in Case of Necessity, to the Preservation of the Universe; and pleasing its owne peculiar Tendency, which delightsAn. Dom. 1179. in ascending: Such now the Condition of Andronicus, who in this undertaking, would show Courteous in granting the Request of his friends, appeare pious in promoting the generall good, and withall satisfie the Appetite of his owne Ambition and Revenge. Wherefore with treasure, whereof he had plenty, he provided men and Armes, and prepared with all speed for the Expedition.
10. But he could not be more busie about his War, then Xene was imployed about her wantōnesse, counting in life all spilt, that was not sport, who to revenge herselfe on envious death, meant in mirth to make herselfe Reparation, for the Shortnesse of her life. That time, which flieth of it selfe, she sought to drive a way, with unlawful Recreations. And though Musicke did jarre, and mirth was prophanesse, at thisAn. Dom. 1179. present time, wherein all did feele what was bad, and feare what was worse, yet shee by wā ton Songes (Panders to Lust) and other provocatives, did awake the sleeping Sparks of her Corruption, into a flame of open wickednesse.
11. But it was a great and sudden abatement to her jollity to heare, that Andronicus, with a puissant Armie, was approaching the City. Alexius Protosebastus, her minion, did woe al people to make resistance. But he found abundance of Neuters, (of that luke-warme temper) which Heaven and Hell doth hate,) who would not out of their Houses, but stay at *foreignhome and side with neither party, these did maintaine that the publicke Good was nothing but the result of many mens particular good, and therefore held; that in saving their own they advanced the generall.An. Dom. 1179. Indeed they hop'd, though the great vessell of the State was wrackt, in a private fly-boat of Neutrality, to waft their own Adventure safe to the Shore. But who ever saw dauncers on Rops, so equally to poise themselves, but at last they fell downe and brake their Necks? And we will take the Boldnesse to point at these hereafter, and to show what was their Successe.
12. The best thing wch befrended Protosebastus (next to his owne Money) was the obliging disposition of Xene. She had as many Nets as Gestures to catch affections in, and with her Smiles, did not onelyonly presse, but pay all Carpet Knights, and amorous Persons to be of her partie. The City of Constantinople was thrice walled, with wood, stones, and bones, plenty of Shipping, artificiall Fortifications, and multitudes of men. The worst was, theirAn. Dom. 1179. Arsenall was a goodly Stable of gallant wooden Horses, but they wanted Riders to manage them, The Grecians (at this time) being very simple Seamen, though Nature may seeme both to woe and teach them to be skilfull Mariners, by affording them plenty of Safe Harbours. However the Grecians conceiving Navigation beneath their honour (which indeed was above their Industrie,) resigned the benefit of Trading in their owne Seas to the Italians of Pisa, Genoa, Florence, and Venice. Protosebastus hired Mercenary Mariners of these, and with them man'd his Ships, Stopping the passages of Propontis, by which Andronicus coming from Paphlagonia, out of the lesser Asia, was to passe.
13 But now an Admirall was to be provided for his Navie: Conto-Stephanus the great Duke, formerly mentioned, challengedAn. Dom. 1179. the Place as proper to himselfe, scorning to be made a Stale to weare the Style in Peace, and not to execute the Office in warr, when occasion was offered to shew his valour, and serve his Countrie. What should Protosebastus do? it is equally dangerous to offend, or imploy him. Yet he resolves on the latter, not willing to teach him, to be dishonest by suspecting him, and conceiving it to be an engagement, on a Noble Nature to be trusty, because he was trusted. But he no sooner received the Charge, but betrayed all the Galleyes to Andronicus, whereby in an instant he was made Master of all those Seas. The news whereof being brought to the City; oh what riding, what runing, what packing, what posting! happy he that could trip up his Neighbours heeles, to get first into the favour of Andronicus. An. Dom. 1179.Many that stak't their wives and children at home in the City, had laid good Betts abroad on the opposite Party.
14. Andronicus being easily wafted over, comes to the Gates of Constantinople. Here to oppose him, there was rather a Skirmish then a Fight, or rather a flourish then a skirmish, the land forces consisting of two Sorts. First old Souldiers, who formerly having been notorious Plunderers, had their Armes so pressed downe, with the weight of the peoples just Curses, that they could not lift up their Swords to any purpose, but having formerly preyed on their Friends, were made a prey to there Foes: Secondly Citizens; vsed onelyonly to traverse their Shops, and unacquainted with military Performances. The city once entred, was instantly conquered,An. Dom. 1179 (whose strength was much overfam'd) such populous Places, like unweildy bodies, sink with their owne weight.
15. Protosebastus was taken Prisoner, and was kept some dayes and nights waking, being pinch'd, when once offering to shut his eyes. A torment which we meet not with to be used to so high a person, though (they say) of late in Fashion, for the discovery of Witches.
But to put him out of his paine, Andronicus is conceived by some, mercifull unto him, in causing his eyes to be bored out, seeing it was lesse torture not to see, then not to sleepe; So much for this great Coward, though this his Character, cannot be guessed from his Demeanour herein, seeing a better Souldier might have been worsted in this Expedition againg Force, of openAn. Dom. 1179 Foes, and fraud of seeming freinds, it being impossible to make them fight, who are resolved to flye.
16. The Army thus entring the City, some outrages, they must of Course commit, but those, neither for Number or Nature, such as might have been expected: For when a place is taken by Assault, the most strict Commanders are not able to keep the mouthes of their Souldiers Swords fasting, but may be commended for moderate, if they feed not to a Surfet. Besides, such was the infinite wealth of Constantinople, her treasures would tempt the fingers of Saints, much more of Souldiers; the Paphlagonians, (whereof the Army consisted,) vowed, that seeing their Swords had done so good service, they would make hilts of Gold, forAn. Dom. 1179. their Blades of Steele.
17. There was then inhabiting in the City of Constantinople, multitudes of Frankes (understand French, Germanes, and principally Italians,) so that well might this City be called new Rome, from the aboundance of Latins that lived therein, These first by Manufactures, and then by Merchandice, got great wealth, (their diligence being more, and Luxurie lesse then the Greekes,) insomuch that they ingrossed all Trading to themselves. This attracted the Envie of the Natives, that Strangers should suck the Marrow of the State, alledging, that in Processe of time, the Ivie would grow to be an Oake, & those prove absolute in their owne power, which, at first, were dependent for their Protection. Andronicus with some-thing more than a bareAn. Dom. 1179. Connivance, though lesse then a full Command, freely consigned these Frankes over to the Rapine of his Army.
18. Such of them as related, by former Freindship or Alliance to the Grecians, fled to them for shelter, who, instead of preserving, persecuted them, their Company being Conceived Infectious, lest it should bring the Plague of the Souldiers fury along with it. And who findes a faithfull friend in Miserie? All their goods were spoild, and most of there lives spill'd, save such as formerly had escaped by flight to their Ships. Thus Andronicus found a cheap way, both to pay his Souldiers, and please the People, who counted him an excellent Phisitian of the State, and this a great Cure done by him, in purging the superfluous, yea noxius Aliens out ofn. Dom. 1199. the City. Indeed carefull he was to preserve the City it selfe from spoiling, as having then a squint eye at the Empire; and knowing Constantinople, to be the Seat thereof, he would not deface that faire Chaire into which, in due time, he hop'd himselfe to sit downe.