Sacred Therapy, Book 2 · Chapter 16
CHAP. XVI.
Wherein is solved the true converts doubt of his regeneration, because he seemeth to himself not to grow in grace by the use of the means appointed for his growth.
SOme true converts are brought to suspect their own regeneration, because in the using of the means leading to sanctification and salvation, sundry complain and say, I do not perceive the Lords blessing on my pains and diligence; I grow not in the knowledge of things spiritual; my faith doth not grow by hearing nor reading of the Word of God, nor by meditation of it; I do not prevail in wrestling against my in-bred sin and corrupt nature, neither by prayer nor fasting: and therefore, what shall I judge of my state, but that it is like I am not converted and renewed? For, if I were indeed converted and reconciled with God, I conceive it should fair otherwayes with me then it doth.
2. In this case the true convert is in hazard of growing slack and careless in the use of the means, and to grieve the holy Spirit, by prescribing unto him and limiting of him unto such a measure of profiting in the use of the means, and making him know how far he had profited and advanced in the course of sanctification. Yea, there is danger, lest in this case the convert not only become cold-rife in the exercises of piety, but also turn loose in his conversation, and follow the allurements of the world, having so far hearkened to the temptation, as to think it in vain that he hath washen his hands in innocency; as (Ps. 73.) befell the Prophet.
3. For removing of this doubt, the afflicted hath reason to check himself for hearkening so far unto the temptation, as to joyn with hypocrits in his complaint, Isa. 58. 5. Wherefore have we fasted (say they) and thou …st not? wherefore have we afflicted our souls, and thou …ikest no knowledge?
But because nothing doth more trouble the afflicted then his suspicion of his own hypocrisie, let the causes be searched from which his suspicion doth arise. One of them may be this, that in the use of the means, the eyes of the afflicted are more and more opened to perceive the power and poyson of his natural corruption more clearly then he perceived before. And this deciphering of sin more and more, doth hinder him to see the growth of his light and the growth of his hatred against manifested sin, joyned with the overturning of his own high imaginations and native pride. Another cause may be this, that the true convert hath promised unto himself, in the use of the means, more and greater benefits spiritual from God, then he doth by experience find, which because he doth not find, he thinketh he hath not profited. A third cause may be this, that the Lord is about the purging of him from practical errors, such as are the high estimation of his own diligence in the use of the means, as if there were some sort of merit annexed unto the works prescribed to the convert by the Lord, or as if the use of the means had in them some force and efficacy in producing such effects in him as the convert hath expected; or, as if the Lord had oblieged himself to blesse, sensibly, diligence in the use of the means, to the diligent mans satisfaction.
4. Therefore, first, let the afflicted continue in his diligence, and bewar of the foresaid practical errors; let him humble himself before Christ, that he may draw more vertue out of him by faith, and by so much the more as he …indeth sin himself, and not profi…ing in the use of the means, let him lay the faster hold on the covenant of grace, and on Christ offered therein, for giving righteousnesse and sanctification. Secondly, let him set upon the exercise of every duty with prayer, that he may follow the duty in Christs name with his eye fixed on Gods grace; and after the discharge of the duty, let him look to Christ, that from him, he may have the blessing: for, without Christ we can do nothing acceptably, nor with profit. Last of all, let him not esteem lightly of the effects of his diligence, as if he did no wayes profit; but when he hath rightly considered maters, if he find the least fruit following his using of the means, let him give the glory of it to God in Christ the giver thereof, and humbly put up his lamentation for his short-coming in duties unto God by prayer: for, this is the way to make progresse in faith and repentance, and humility and submission of his will unto God in the use of the means, and let him thank the Lord, that from day to day he is keeped from scandalous out-breaking.