A Treatise of Self-Denial, Treatise · Chapter 65
CHAP. LXV. Contrary to the State of Holineſs and Happineſs.
3. MOreover, Selfiſhneſs is contrary to the State of Holineſs and Happineſs: contrary to every grace, and contrary to the life of Glory. For it is the uſe of all grace to recover the ſoul from ſelfiſhneſs to God: that God may be Loved, and Self-love may be overcome: that God may be truſted, and pleaſed, and his ſervice may be our care and buſineſs, when before our care was to Pleaſe our ſelves.
And the very felicity of the ſoul conſiſteth in a cloſing and communion with God. The ſoul that will be happy, muſt be conſcious of ſelf-inſufficiency, and muſt go out of it ſelf, and ſeek after life in God; It muſt forſake it ſelf, and apply it ſelf to him. Men loſe their labour till they deny themſelves, by going to a broken empty ciſtern, and forſaking the fountain of living waters. The nearer men are to God, and the more fully they are conformed to him, and cloſe with him, and know him, and love him, the happyer they are. Glory it ſelf is but the neareſt and fulleſt intuition and fruition of God: And he that hath moſt of him here in his ſoul, and in the creatures, providences, and ordinances, is the happieſt man on Earth, and likeſt to the glorified. And there is no approach to God but by departing from carnal ſelf. I know ſelf-ſeeking men do think of finding more peace and comfort in that way: but they are alway deceived of their hopes: It is ſelf-denial that is the way to peace and comfort. While we reſt on our ſelves, or are taken up with anxious caring for our ſelves, we are but toſt up and down as on a tempeſtuous ſea, and are ſeeking Reſt but never find it: but when we retire from our ſelves to God, we are preſently at the harbour, and find that Peace which before we ſought in vain. I confeſs, in the too-little experience that I have my ſelf of the way of peace and quiet to the ſoul, I muſt needs ſay, there is none to this: There is none but this. Never can I ſtep out, but ſelf meets with ſomewhat that is vexatious and diſpleaſing to it: This buſineſs goes croſs, and that buſineſs is troubleſome: this perſon is troubleſome, and that perſon is abuſive and injurious: One is falſe and treacherous, or ſlanderous; and another is imprudent, and weak, and burdenſome: what between the baits of proſperity, and the troubles of affliction, the perverſeneſs of adverſaries, and the weakneſs of friends, and the changes that all States and perſons are liable to; the multitudes that would be pleaſed, and the labour and the coſt that it will ſtand us in to pleaſe them, and the multitudes that will be diſpleaſed when we have done our beſt; and the murmurings, reproaches, and falſe accuſations that we ſhall be ſure of from the diſpleaſed; and which is worſt of all, the burdenſome weakneſſes and corruptions of our own ſouls, and the ſins of our lives, and the daily vexation that our dark and ſhattered condition doth occaſion to our ſelves; I ſay, between all theſe diſquieting perplexities, enough to rack and tear in pieces the heart of man, I have no way but to ſhut up the eyes of ſenſe, and forget all ſelf-intereſt, and withdraw from the creature, as if there were no ſelf or creature for it in the world, and to retire into God and ſatisfie my ſoul with his Goodneſs and All-ſufficiency, and faithfulneſs, and immutability. And in him is nothing to diſquiet or diſcontent, unleſs you will call his enmity to our own diſeaſes and unhappineſs a diſcontenting thing. And this is not my own experience alone, but all that know what Chriſtian Peace and Comfort is, do know that they loſe it, and are torn in pieces while they are caring and contriving for themſelves; and that Retiring into God, and caſting all their care on him, and ſatisfying themſelves with him alone, though all the creatures ſhould turn againſt them, is the way to their content and quietneſs of mind. The Example of David is exceeding obſervable, 1 Sam. 30. 6. When beſides the diſtreſſed eſtate that he was before in, the City where he left his family and the families of his followers, was taken and burnt down, and their wives and children carried away, & all gone, ſo that David and the people that were with him, lift up their voice and wept, untill they had no more power to weep; and to make up his calamity, the Souldiers that were with him talkt of ſtoning him becauſe of the loſs of their wives and children; in this deſolate condition, ſaith the Text [but David encouraged (or comforted) himſelf in the Lord his God] And it is good for us ſometime to have nothing in this world left us that will afford us comfort, that we may be driven to God for it: Till the houſe be as on fire over our heads, and we are as it were fired out of every room of it, we will hardly be gone, and betake our ſelves to God our only Reſt. Try it Chriſtians when you will, and you ſhall find it true, that ſelfiſh contents do but tice you to ſtraggle away from your true comfort; and when you have done all, it is in returning unto God that you muſt find the comfort which you loſt by ſeeking it abroad. It is only in the God of Peace, that your ſouls will find peace, and therefore away from ſelf and creatures, and retire into God.