A Treatise of Self-Denial, Treatise · Chapter 14
CHAP. XIV. Self-conceitedneſs muſt be denied.
3. THe next part of ſelfiſhneſs to be mortified, is in the ſame faculty, and it is called ſelf-conceitedneſs. And it conſiſteth of two parts: the firſt is a Diſpoſition to ſelfiſh opinions or conceits that are properly our own: and the ſecond is, to think better of thoſe conceits than they do deſerve.
Naturally men are prone to ſpin themſelves a web of opinions out of their own brain, & to have a Religion that may be called their own: And it's their Own in two reſpects: 1. Becauſe it is of their own deviſing, and not of Gods revealing or appointing: 2. Becauſe it ſuiteth with their own carnal ends and intereſts. Men are far readier to make themſelves a faith, than to receive that which God hath formed to their hands. And they are far readier to receive a Doctrine that tends to their carnal commodity, or honour, or delights, than one that tends to ſelf-denial, and to abaſe themſelves, and exalt the Lord. 2. And when they have hatched or received ſuch opinions which are peculiarly their Own, they are apt to like them the better, becauſe they are their own, and to value them becauſe of the Intereſt of ſelf. O Sirs, that you did but know the commonneſs and danger of ſelf-conceitedneſs in the world! Even with many that ſeem humble, and verily think that it is the ſpirit of God that beareth the greateſt ſway in their underſtandings, yet ſelf doth there erect its throne. O how ſecretly & ſubtilly will ſelf inſinuate, and make you believe that it's a pure ſelf-denying light which guideth you, andt hat what you hold is meerly by the cogent evidence of truth, or the illumination of the Spirit, when it is but a Viper that ſelf hath hatched and doateth on, becauſe it is her own. Becauſe the Papiſts have gone too far in teaching men to depend on the Church and on their Teachers, therefore ſelf-conceitedneſs takes advantage of their error, to draw men into the contrary extream, and make every Infant-Chriſtian to think himſelf wiſer than his moſt experienced Brethren and Teachers; and every raw unſtudied Chriſtian to think himſelf wiſer than thoſe that have been ſearching into the word of truth by ſtudy and prayer almoſt all their days: and therefore to cry down that learning, wiſdom and ſtudy, which they are unacquainted with; that ſeeing they have it not themſelves, they may at leaſt be thought as wiſe men without it, as thoſe that have it, and ſo may provide for the reputation and intereſt of ſelf: O what ſad work hath this great ſin of ſelf-conceitedneſs made in the world! In too many places men make it their Religion to ſtrive who ſhall be greateſt for wiſdom and abilities in the eyes of men: and it is the very work of their Prayers, and conference, and teaching, to exerciſe ſelf-conceitedneſs, and to make it appear that they are ſome body in knowledge: Hence is it that they are ſo apt to fall upon novelties wch either few receive, or none before themſelves deviſed, that being ſingular, ſelf may be the more obſerved, and they may have ſomething which may be called their Own: Hence alſo it is that they are ſo little ſuſpicious of their own opinions, never bending their ſtudies impartially to try whether they are of God or not, but rather to maintain them, and to find out all that can be ſaid for them, and againſt the contrary minded: Hence is it that men have ſuch light and contemptuous thoughts of the judgment of thoſe that excel them in knowledge, and that the voice of Corah, and thoſe other Conſpirators, Numb. 16. 3. is grown ſo common in the mouths of ignorant proud profeſſors, [Ye take too much upon you (ſay they to their Guides and Teachers) ſeeing all the Congregation are holy, every one of them, and the Lord is among them: wherefore then lift ye up your ſelves above the Congregation of the Lord?] It is the Holineſs of the Congregation, and all its members, and the preſence of God himſelf among them, that is pleaded againſt the Superiority of Moſes & Aaron, as if with ſo Holy a people, that had God himſelf to be their Teacher and Guide, there were no need of men to be lift up above the Congregation of the Lord. But it was ſelf that was intended, what ever was pretended. From this ſelf-conceitedneſs alſo it is that the weightieſt common truths that ſelf hath no ſpecial intereſt in, are ſo little valued and reliſhed, and inſiſted on; and that a leſs and more uncertain point which ſelf hath eſpouſed, ſhall be more reliſhed, inſiſted on, and contended for: Hence alſo is moſt of the common confidence of men in their own Opinions; that when the point is doubtful, if not certainly falſe, in the eyes of wiſer men than themſelves, yet the fool rageth and is confident, Prov. 14. 16. He can carry on a conceit of his Own with as brazen a face, and proud contempt of other mens arguments, as if he were maintaining that the Sun is light, and other men pleaded to prove it dark: when, alas, it is ſelf-intereſt that is the life, the ſtrength, the goodneſs of the cauſe. Hence alſo it is that men are ſo quarrelſom with the words and ways of others, that they can ſcarce hear or read a word, but theſe pugnacious animals are ready to draw upon it, as if they had catch'd an advantage for the honouring of their valour, and were loth to loſe ſuch a prize and opportunity for a victory and triumph: Hence it is that hi…ing at the ſayings and doings of others, is the firſt, and moſt common, and moſt ſenſible part of their Commentaries. And that they can make hereſies and monſters not only of tolerable errors, but of truths themſelves, if they have but the inexpiable guilt of croſſing the wiſdom of theſe ſelf-conceited men. Hence it is that opinions of their own are more induſtriouſly cultivated and ſtudiouſly cheriſhed, by a double if not a tenfold proportion of Zeal and diligence, than common truths that all the godly in the world have as much intereſt in as they, though the common truths be incomparably the greater. And hence it is that men are ſo tenacious of that which is their Own, when they eaſilier let go that which is Gods; and muſt have all come to them, and every man deny his own judgment, except themſelves; and that it muſt be the glory of others to yield to them, and their glory to yield to none, but to have all men come over and ſubmit to them. All theſe are the fruits and diſcoveries of ſelf as it reigns in mens underſtandings, who poſſibly may think that it's Chriſt and the Spirit that's there exalted.
Yet miſtake me not: I do not ſay or think that a man ſhould forſake a certain truth for fear of being accounted ſelf-conceited, nor that he muſt preſently captivate his own underſtanding to a learneder man, or the ſtronger, or more numerous ſide, for fear of being ſelf-conceited. Much leſs muſt I deny that grace of God that hath made me ſavingly wiſe by his illumination, that was formerly fooliſh, diſobedient, and deceived in the days of my ignorance. The world muſt give us leave to triumph over our own former folly with Paul, Tit. 3. 3, 4, 5. and ſay with the ſame Paul, that we were no better than mad when we were enemies to the Goſpel, Act. 26. 11. and with the man in Joh. 9. 25. [One thing I know, that whereas I was blind, now I ſee.] It's no ſelf-conceitedneſs for a man that is brought from the blind diſtracted ſtate of ſin, into the light of the ſanctified, to know that he is wiſer than he was before; and that he was formerly beſides himſelf, but now is come to his underſtanding again. Nor is it any ſelf-conceitedneſs for the meaneſt Chriſtian to know that a wicked man is more fooliſh than he; or for a Miniſter or any man that God hath cauſed to excel in knowledge, to hold faſt the truth he knows, and to ſee and modeſtly oppoſe the errors of another, and to know that in that he is wiſer than they. God doth not require that we ſhall turn to every mans opinion, and reel up and down from ſect to ſect, and be of the opinion of every party that we come among, and all for fear of thinking our ſelves wiſer than they. David knew he had more Underſtanding than his Teachers: Pſal. 119. 98, 99. and true believers fear not to ſay▪ We know that we are of God, and the whole world lieth in wickedneſs, 1 Joh. 5. 19. & 3. 19. & 2. 3. And Paul would not forbear the reproving of Peter, for fear of being thought to be ſelf-conceited, Gal. 2. ſome men are ſo deſperately ſelf-conceited that they take every man to be ſelf-conceited that is not of their conceits.
But when ſelf is mens inſtructor, and chooſeth their Text, and furniſheth them with matter, and nothing is ſavoury but what is either ſuited to the common intereſt of ſelf, or which it hath not a ſpecial intereſt in; when men are abſolutely wiſe in their own eyes, and comparatively wiſer than thoſe that know much more than they; when ſelf-intereſt ſerves inſtead of evidence to the receiving, retaining, or contending for a point; when men think they know that which indeed they do not know; and obſerve the little which they do know, more than an hundred fold more that they are ignorant of; doubtleſs here's ſelf-conceitedneſs with a witneſs; and they that will not ſee it in a lower degree, methinks ſhould ſee it in ſuch a caſe as this. He that will not believe that a man is drunk when he reels and ſtammereth, may know it when he lieth ſpewing in the ſtreets.
Well Sirs, I beſeech you ſee that ſelf in the underſtanding be mortified and pulled down. It's the throne of God, the Lanthorn of holy truth, the temple of the Spirit; and ſhall ſelf Rule there? The underſtanding is it that guideth the ſoul and all the actions of your lives: and if ſelf rule there, what a Ruler will you have? and what a caſe will heart and life be in? If your eye be dark, your Light be dark, how great will be your darkneſs: and if it be ſelfiſh, it is certainly ſo far dark. O believe the Holy Ghoſt, Prov. 26. 12. [Seeſt thou a man wiſe in his own conceit? there is more hope of a fool than of him.] For a meer fool that is ignorant only for want of teaching, hath no ſuch prejudice againſt the truth, as the ſelfconceited have: Nor is it ſo hard to make him know that he is ignorant: nor yet to make him willing to Learn: He that knoweth himſelf to be blind, is willing to be led. Moreover the ſelf-conceited have much to unlearn, before they can be fit to receive the truth in a ſaving maner. O how many thouſands are undone by ſelf-conceitedneſs! It is this that keeps out Knowledge, and every Grace, and conſequently all true peace and comfort; and this it is that defendeth and cheriſheth all ſin. Let us ſhew men the plaineſt word of God for duty and againſt ſin, and ſhew them the cleareſt reaſons, and yet ſelf-conceitedneſs bolts the door againſt all: Yea ſo wonderfully doth this ſin prevail, that the ignorant ſilly people that know almoſt nothing, are as proudly ſelf-conceited as if they were the wiſeſt men: They that will not learn, and cannot give an account of their knowledge, in the very Catechiſm or Principles of Chriſtian Religion, nor cannot pray, nor ſcarce ſpeak a word of ſenſe about the matters of Salvation, but excuſe themſelves that they are no Scholars, yet theſe very people will proudly reſiſt their Teachers, though they were the wiſeſt and learned'ſt men in the Land: Let us but croſs their conceits of Doctrine or Practice in Religion; about their own title to Church-priviledges, or fitneſs for them, and they are confident and furious againſt their Miniſters, as if we were as ignorant as they, and they were the wiſeſt men in the world: ſo that pride and ſelf-conceitedneſs makes people mad, or deal like mad men. We cannot humble men for ſin, nor reclaim them from it, till they know the ſin, and the danger of it: and ſelfconceitedneſs will not let them know it, no nor let them come to us to be taught: but they are wiſe enough already: and if we tell them of the ſin and danger, they are wiſer than to believe the Word of God or us! They will tell us to our faces, they will never believe ſuch and ſuch things, which we ſhew them in the Scripture. O the precious light that ſhineth round about you all, and would make you wiſe, if ſelf-conceitedneſs did not keep it out by making you ſeem wiſe already. 1 Cor. 3. 18. Theſe men that thus deceive themſelves, by ſeeming wiſe to themſelves, muſt become fools in their own eyes, if ever they will be truly wiſe; and confeſs themſelves, as Paul himſelf did, that they were fooliſh and deceived, when they ſerved their luſts and pleaſures, Tit. 3. 3. This Pride and Self-conceitedneſs is like the barm in the drink, that ſeems to fill up the veſſel, but indeed works it all over: This is the Knowledge that puffeth up, 1 Cor. 13. like the pot that by boiling ſeemeth to be filled, that was half empty before; but it's empty in the bottom, and preſently boils over, and is emptier than before. So is it with the ſelf-conceited, that have a ſuperficial knowledge, while they are empty at the bottom, and by the heat of pride, that little they have boileth over to their loſs. It is the humble that God reveals his ſecrets to, and the hungry that he filleth with good things, and the full that he ſendeth empty away. He will have no Diſciples that come not to his School as little Children, teachable and tractable, not thinking themſelves too old, or too wiſe, or too good to be taught. If you would ſee the myſteries of the Goſpel ſavingly, you muſt even creep to Chriſt on your knees, and cry, Lord be merciful to me a ſinner! He will not lift up your minds and hearts to heaven, till you think your ſelves unworthy to lift up your very eyes to heaven, becauſe you have ſinned againſt heaven. And if you were even lifted to heaven, ſhould you there but be lifted up with pride or ſelf-conceitedneſs, you ſhould ſoon have a …rick in the fleſh, to let out that dangerous, venomous wind that puffs you up.
And if you ſhould have any Knowledge of the moſt precious truths, as long as you are thus proud and ſelf-conceited, it will not be ſavoury and effectual on your hearts. Humility feedeth, and Pride ſtarveth every Grace. The Spirit of God will not dwell with the proud: He will beat you out of your ſelves, unleſs you drive him away from you. Some ſeeming raptures and comforts, the ſelf-conceited have; which are but the deluding flatteries of ſelf, and the encouragements that Satan giveth to his ſervants: (For Satan will needs be a comforter for a while, as the Holy Ghoſt is to the Saints: and his followers alſo have their joys.) But it is the humble ſoul that hath the ſolid comforts. From the duſt of Humiliation, we have the cleareſt ſight of Glory, and conſequently, the ſweeteſt taſts of it. As high as the rain comes from, it is the loweſt valleys that receive it moſt, and retain it. Faith it ſelf will not proſper in the proud and ſelf-conceited: To ſuch the Goſpel will be fooliſhneſs, or an offence. It is only the humble that ſavingly cloſe with its myſteries. Humility cheriſheth the fear of God, and makes us ſay, How ſhall we do this evil? or neglect this duty? But Self-conceitedneſs and Pride is blind and bold, and deſtroyeth in mens apprehenſions, the difference between things ſacred and common, the holy and the unclean: It diſpoſeth them to ſuch an unreverent boldneſs with holy things, as uſually ends in a prophane contempt: ſo that ſuch can at laſt deſpiſe holy Ordinances which they ſhould live upon. Repentance and this Pride are deadly foes. To be Penitent and Proud, is to be Hot and Cold, alive and dead. Though Chriſt love not to find you in the duſt of earthly-mindedneſs, yet he loves to find you in the duſt of humility. The Publican that hanged down the head, did …it the way better to the ſight of God, than the ſelf-conceited Phariſee. The moſt ſelf-denying humiliation is the neareſt way to heaven, and the moſt ſelf-exalting Pride is the ſureſt and neareſt way to hell. I had rather ſit with Mary waſhing and wiping the feet of Chriſt, than ask as the Mother of James and John, to ſit at Chriſt's right hand and left hand in his Kingdom. Mary was in a manner thanked for the Love of her humility: and they were in a manner denied the requeſt that ſo little ſavoured of ſelf-denial. Our Lord doth not uſe to thank people for their ſervice, and yet he did that which was next to it, to this humble, ſelfdenying, penitent woman. He doth not uſe to deny his own Diſciples an heavenly requeſt: and yet he did that which was next to a denial, when ſelf brought him the petition. He that hath taught us not to preſs to the higheſt room, leſt with ſhame we hear, [Sit lower] doth hereby tell us what we muſt expect from himſelf: And he that hath bid us ſit down at the lower end, that we may hear [Friend ſit up higher] doth expreſs his purpoſe for humble, ſelf-denying ſouls. I had rather from the duſt hear his [Come up higher] than from ſelf-exaltation to hear [Come down lower.] O you that are proud, ſelf-conceited wretches, did you but know what good it doth an humble ſoul, to feel Chriſt take him up from the duſt, you would ſoon fall down that you might taſt their comforts in his lifting up. O what a bleſſed feeling it is, to feel ones ſelf in the arms of Chriſt! Our common compaſſion that makes us run to take up one that falls before us, is a ſpark of that compaſſion in Chriſt: who meddles with him that walks before us? but a man that falls down in a ſwoon, we are all ready to lay hands on! O happy fall, that makes us feel the arms of Chriſt! Though the fall into ſin be never the better, that occaſioneth it, yet the fall into Humiliation is the better, that prepareth for it. He that in his agony had an Angel to miniſter to him, will not leave the ſelf-denying, humble ſoul, without his Angel, or ſome way of relief that is ſutable to the neceſſity. Chriſt himſelf will not communicate himſelf to the proud and ſelf-conceited. He is wiſdom, but not to them that are wiſe in their own eyes already. He is Righteouſneſs, but not to them that Juſtifie themſelves: He is Sanctification, but not to thoſe that never found their own uncleanneſs. He is Redemption, but to none but thoſe that feel themſelves condemned. He hath the white raiment, and the treaſures of grace and glory: but it's only thoſe that penitently feel that they are poor and miſerable, and blind, and naked. Truly Sirs, though I have no mind to trouble the well-grounded peace or comfort of any of your Souls, yet I would adviſe you, if you have never ſo good thoughts of your ſelves, ſuſpect leſt it ſhould be the fruit of ſelf-conceitedueſs: And if you ſhould have never ſo much peace and joy, look well whether it come from God or ſelf-conceit! And if it come not in againſt ſelf, it's ten to one but it comes from ſelf. If your Peace and Comfort be not won from Chriſt, in a way of ſelf-denial, and as the ſpoils of the fleſh, you have it not in the ordinary way of God. Did you come to your Joy and Peace by humility, and ſelf-denial, and patience, and mortification, and by becoming little Children, and the ſervants of all, and by learning of Chriſt to be meek and lowly? If not, take heed leſt you nouriſh a changeling, an Imp of Hell, and a ſelfiſh brat, inſtead of the fruit of the Spirit; the peace and joy of the Holy Ghoſt. If you feel no great matter at home to trouble you, you are too Righteous to be Juſtified by Chriſt. If you groan not under your ignorance and unbelief, you are too wiſe to be Chriſt's Diſciples. If you mourn not under the load and pain of ſin, you are too well to be Chriſt's Patients. If you are readier to juſtifie and excuſe your ſelves, than to condemn your ſelves, and had rather hear your ſelves praiſed, than reproved, admoniſhed, or inſtructed, and like Diotrephes, love to have the preheminence, you are too high for Chriſt to take any acquaintance with you; and too full of ſelf to have any room for his Love, and Spirit, and heavenly Conſolations. He that gave us the Parable of the importunate widdow, Luke 18. 2, 3. would have us underſtand that bare neceſſity is not enough to fit us for relief (for then the worſt of men ſhould be the fitteſt:) but it muſt be Neceſſity ſo felt, as to humble us, and drive us to importunity with God. The Prodigal was miſerable when he was denied the husks; but he never felt his Fathers embracements till he came to himſelf by denying himſelf, and returning to his Father. And this the ſelf-conceited will not be perſwaded to. The firſt that muſt touch Chriſt after his Reſurrection, is not a King, nor a Lord, no nor a man, but a woman that had been a ſinner. When ſhe held him by the feet, Love did begin low in humility, but it tended higher, and ended higher. Chriſt hath told us that where much is forgiven there will be much love. For there's moſt of the fruits of God's love, and leaſt of ſelf, and moſt to abaſe ſelf. It is not poſſible that love to Chriſt ſhould dwell or work in any but the humble, that feel at the heart that they are unworthy of love, and worthy of everlaſting wrath. The Proud and Self conceited cannot love him; for they cannot be much taken with Chriſt's love to them, except as the Phariſee in a way of ſelf-flattery. But the poor ſoul that was loſt, will heartily love him that ſought and found him; and he that was dead, will love when he finds himſelf alive; and he that was condemned both by God and conſcience, will ſurely love the Lord that ranſomed him! And it is the apprehenſions that men have of themſelves that much cauſeth all this difference. The ſelf-abhorring ſelf-judgeing, ſelf-denying ſinner is melted with the love of God in Chriſt, becauſe it is to ſuch a worthleſs, ſinful wretch. What Lord, ſaith he, is the blood of Chriſt, the pardon of ſin, the ſpirit of grace, the priviledges of a child, and everlaſting glory for ſuch an unworthy wretch as I, that have ſo long offended thee, and ſo much neglected thee and lived ſuch a life as I have done, and am ſuch an empty unprofitable worm? [O what a wonder of mercy is this!] But the full ſoul loaths the honey-comb. The ſelf-conceited unhumbled ſinner looks as mindleſly at Chriſt, as a healthful man at the Phyſitian, or an innocent man at a pardon.
And that good that is in the Proud and Self-conceited doth ſeldom do much good to others, (much leſs to themſelves.) As ſuch do but ſerve themſelves, ſo ordinarily God doth not bleſs their endeavours: but as they are perverted, they are the likeſt to pervert others, and propagate their ſelf-conceitedneſs: Two words from an humble ſelf-denying man, doth oftentimes more good than a Sermon from the ſelf-conceited.
I admoniſh you therefore in the name of God, that you take heed of this part of ſelfiſhneſs and mortifie it. It will elſe keep out God, and almoſt all that is good. If you are proud and ſelf-conceited, you will hear a Miniſter rather to cavil with him, than to be edified: and when any thing from God doth croſs your fooliſh wiſdom, you will but ſlight it, or make a jeſt at it: And if any truth of God do ſtrike at the heart of your ſelfiſh intereſt, you will but fret at it, and ſecretly hate it, and perhaps, as the Devils open ſouldiers, publickly reproach it; and as the Jews did againſt Stephen, Act. 7. even gnaſh the teeth at the Preacher, or as they did by Paul, Act. 22. 22. [They gave him audience to that word (even that word that made againſt themſelves) and then lift up their voices, and ſaid, Away with ſuch a fellow from the earth; for it is not fit that he ſhould live] This entertainment we ſtill meet with from our hearers, when ſelf hath brought them the next ſtep to hell.
O Sirs, ſuſpect your own underſtandings: Think not of them beyond the proportion of your attainments: Nor beyond your experience, and the helps, and time, and opportunities which you have had for knowledge, nor beyond the meaſure of your diligence for the improving of theſe. For theſe are God's ordinary way of giving in a ripeneſs in knowledge. Read and ſtudy, Heb. 5. 12, 14. 1 Tim. 3. 6. Set not up your own conceits too boldly againſt thoſe of longer ſtanding and diligence in holy ſtudies, much leſs againſt your Teachers, and much leſs againſt a multitude of Miniſters; and much leſs againſt all the Church of God; and leaſt of all againſt God himſelf, as ſpeaking to you by the holy Scriptures. O take warning by the ſwarms of hereſies and ſcandals that have been cauſed by ſelf-conceitedneſs and pride.
Object. If you may think your ſelf wiſer than me and others without ſelf-conceitedneſs, why may not I think my ſelf wiſer than you and ſuch others without ſelf-conceitedneſs? Anſw. I may not do it in the caſes before-mentioned. I may not think my ſelf to be what I am not, nor exalt my ſelf above them that are wiſer than I, nor againſt my Guides, or the Church of God.
Object. But it is but your conceit that you are wiſe enough to be a Teacher, or wiſer than others, and why may not I as well conceit it?
Anſw. No man on his own Conceits muſt become a Teacher; but the judicious of that Calling muſt Call them, and judge of their abilities. And conceits are as the ground of them is. The true underſtanding of the grace that we have received is a duty, and fitteth us for thankfulneſs: but the falſe conceit that we have what we have not, is a dangerous deluſion [For he that thinketh he is ſomething when he is nothing, deceiveth himſelf, Gal. 6. 3.] What if a blind man ſhould argue as you do with one that ſees, and ſay, [You ſay that you ſee ſo far off, and why may not I ſay ſo too?] would you not anſwer him [I know that which I ſay to be true, and ſo do not you] And what if he ſtill go on and ſay [you think that I am blind, and I think that you are blind; and why may not I be believed as well as you?] would this kind of talk prove the man to have his eye-ſight? or ſhould it make me queſtion whe…er I have mine? He that ſeeth knoweth that he ſeeth, whoever queſtion it: and if another make doubt of it, let men that have eyes in their head be Judges, but not the blind. But I confeſs, ſpiritual blindneſs hath this diſadvantage, that whereas I can eaſily make any other blind man know that he is blind, and therefore be willing to be led or help'd: here the more blind men are, moſt commonly they are the more confident that they ſee, and ſcornfully ſay, as the Phariſees to Chriſt, John 9. 40. [Are we blind alſo?] For Pride will not let them know their ignorance. The ſame light that cureth ignorance, muſt reveal it. Eſpecially when men are born blind and never knew the ſaving illumination of the Saints, they will not believe that there is any other light than they have ſeen. But I have been ſomewhat long on this part; I paſs now to the next.