The Mischiefs of Self-Ignorance, Part 13

The Mischiefs of Self-Ignorance · Part 13

p. 276II. I have done with that part of my ſpecial Exhortation which concerned the unregenerate: I am next to ſpeak to thoſe of you that by Grace are brought into a better ſtate: and to tell you, that it very much concerneth you alſo, even the beſt of you to labour to be well acquainted with your ſelves: and that both in reſpect p. 277of 1. Your ſins and wants, and 2. Your Graces and your duties.

I. Be acquainted with the root and remnant of your ſins: with your particular inclinations and corrupt affections: with their quality, their degree and ſtrength: with the weakneſſes of every grace: with your diſability to duty: and with the omiſſions or ſinfull practiſes of your lives. Search diligently and deeply; frequently and accurately peruſe your hearts and wayes, till you certainly and throughly know your ſelves.

And I beſeech you let it not ſuffice you that you know your ſtates, and have found your ſelves in the Love of God, in the faith of Chriſt, and poſſeſſed by his Spirit. Though this be a mercy worth many worlds, yet this is not all concerning your ſelves that you have to know. If yet you ſay that you have no ſin, you deceive your ſelves. If yet you think you are paſt all danger, your danger is the greater for this miſtake. As much as you have been humbled for ſin: as much as you have loathed it, and your ſelves for it: as oft as you have confeſſed it, lamented it, and complained and prayed againſt it, yet it is alive: Though it be mortified, it is alive. It is ſaid to be mortified p. 276as to the prevalency and reign, but the relicts of it yet ſurvive: were it perfectly dead, you were perfectly delivered from it, and might ſay you have no ſin: but it is not yet ſo happy with you. It will find work for the blood and ſpirit of Chriſt, and for your ſelves, as long as you are in the fleſh. And alas, too many that know themſelves to be upright in the main, are yet ſo much unacquainted with their hearts and lives as to the degrees of grace and ſin, as that it much diſadvantageth them in their Chriſtian progreſs. Go along with me in the carefull obſervation of theſe following Evils, that may befall even the regenerate by the remnants of ſelf-ignorance.

1. The work of Mortification is very much hindered, becauſe you know your ſelves no better: as may appear in all theſe following diſcoveries.

1. You confeſs not ſin to God or man ſo penitently and ſenſibly as you ought, becauſe you know your ſelves no better. Did you ſee your inſide with a fuller view, how deeply would you aggravate your ſin? How heavily would you charge your ſelves? Repentance would be more intenſe and more effectual: and when you were more contrite, you would be more meet for the ſenſe of p. 277pardon, and for Gods delight, Iſa. 51.15. & 66.2. It would fill you more with godly ſhame and ſelf-abhorrence, if you better knew your ſelves. It would make you more ſenſibly ſay with Paul, Rom. 7.23, 24. [I ſee another Law in my members warring againſt the Law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the Law of ſin, which is in my members. O wretched man that I am, who ſhall deliver me from the body of this death!] And with David, Pſal. 38.18. I will declare my iniquity; I will be ſorry for my ſin, & 40.12. They are more then the hairs of my head, & 32.5. I acknowledged my ſin unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid: I ſaid I will confeſs my tranſgreſſions to the Lord, and thou forgaveſt the iniquity of my ſin.] Repentance is the Death of ſin: and the knowledge of our ſelves ▪ and the ſight of our ſins ▪ is the life of Repentance.

2. You pray not againſt ſin, for grace and pardon ſo earneſtly as you ſhould, becauſe you know your ſelves no better. O that God would but open theſe too-cloſe hearts unto us, and anatomize the relicts of the old man, and ſhew us all the receſſes of our ſelf-deceit, and the filth of worldlineſs, and carnal inclinations that lurk within us, and read us a Lecture upon every p. 280part; what prayers would it teach us to indite! That you be not proud of your holineſs, let me tell you Chriſtians, that a full diſplay of the corruptions that the beſt of you carry about you, would not only take down ſelf-exalting thoughts, that you be not lift up above meaſure, but would teach you to pray with fervour and importunity, and waken you out of your ſleepy indifferency, and make you cry, O wretched man that I am, who ſhall deliver me! If the ſight of a Lazar or cripple or naked perſon move you to compaſſion, though they uſe no words: if the ſight of a man that is gaſping for want of your relief, will affect you: ſurely the ſight of your own deformities, wants and dangers would affect you if you ſaw them as they are. How many a ſin do you forget in your Confeſſions that ſhould have a particular Repentance? and how many wants do you overlook in prayers, that ſhould have particular petitions for a mercifull ſupply? And how many are lightly touched, and run over with words of courſe, that would be earneſtly inſiſted on, if you did but better know your ſelves! O that God would perſuade you better to ſtudy your hearts, and pray out of that Book when ever you draw nigh him: that you not might be ſo p. 281like the Hypocrites, that draw near to him with the lips, when their hearts are far from him. To my ſhame I muſt confeſs that my ſoul is too dry and barren in holy ſupplications to God, and too little affected with my confeſſed ſins and wants: but I am forced to lay all in a very great meaſure upon the imperfect acquaintance that I have at home; I cannot think I ſhould want matter to pour out before the Lord in confeſſion and petition, nor ſo much want fervour and earneſtneſs with God, if my Heart and life lay open to my view, while I am upon my knees.

3. It is for want of a fuller knowledge of your ſelves that you are ſo negligent in your Chriſtian watch, that you do no better guard your ſenſes; that you make no ſtricter a Covenant with your eyes, your appetites, your tongues: that you no more examine what you think, affect and ſay: what paſſeth into your heart or out of it: that you call not your ſelves more frequently to account; but dayes run on, and duties are careleſly performed as of courſe, and no daily or weekly reckoning made to conſcience of all. The knowledge of your weakneſſes, and readineſs to yield, and of your treacherous corruptions that comply p. 280with the enemy, would make you more ſuſpicious of your ſelves, and to walk more circumſpectly, not as fools, but as wiſe, Eph. 5.15. and to look under your feet, and conſider your wayes before you were too bold and venturous. It was the conſciouſneſs of their own infirmity, that ſhould have moved the diſciples to watch and pray, Mat. 26.41. [Watch and pray that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the fleſh is weak.] And all have the ſame charge, becauſe all have the ſame infirmity and danger, [What I ſay to you, I ſay unto all, Watch,] Mar. 13.37. Did we better know how many advantages our own corruptions give the Tempter, that charge of the Holy Ghoſt would awake us all to ſtand to our arms and look about us: 1 Cor. 16.13. Watch ye, ſtand faſt in the faith: quit you like men, be ſtrong:] And Epheſ. 6.11, 12, 13, 14. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to ſtand againſt the wiles of the Devil: For we wraſtle not againts fleſh and blood, but againſt principalities and powers, againſt the rulers of the darkneſs of this world, againſt ſpiritual wickedneſs in high places, &c.] When men know not whoſe legs they ſtand upon they grow heedleſs of their way, and quickly ſlide.

p. 291The knowledge of our ſelves doth ſhew us all the advantages of the tempter: what he hath to work upon, and what in us to take his part, and conſequently where he is likeſt to aſſault us: and ſo, puts us into ſo prepared a poſture for defence, as very much hindereth his ſucceſs. But ſo far as we do not know our ſelves, we are like blind men in ſenſing, that the adverſary may hit in what part he pleaſe: we have ſo many hidden enemies in our houſes, as will quickly open the door to more. What ſin may not Satan tempt a man into, that is not acquainted with the corruptions and frailties of his own heart?

4. It is for want of Self-acquaintance that we make not out for help againſt our ſin to Miniſters or other friends that could aſſiſt us: And that we uſe the confirming Ordinances with no more care and diligence. All the abilities and willingneſs of others, and all the helps of Gods appoin…ment, will be neglected, when we ſhould imploy them againſt our ſins; ſo far as ſelf-ignorance doth keep us from diſcerning the neceſſity of them.

5. It is for want of a fuller knowledge of our ſelves, that many lie long in ſins unobſerved by themſelves: and many are on the p. 284declining hand, and take no notice of it. And how little reſiſtance or mortifying endeavours we are like to beſtow upon unknown or unobſerved ſins, is eaſie to conceive. How many may we obſerve to have notable blemiſhes of Pride, oſtentation, deſire of preheminence and eſteem, envy, malice, ſelf-conceitedneſs, ſelf-ſeeking, cenſoriouſneſs, uncharitableneſs, and ſuch like, that ſee no more of it in themſelves, then is in more mortified men? How ordinarily do we hear the Paſtors that watch over them, and their friends that are beſt acquainted with them, lamenting the miſcarriages, and the careleſs walking and declining of many that ſeem Religious, when they lament it not themſelves, nor will not be convinced that they are ſick of any ſuch diſeaſe, any more then all other Chriſtians are? Hence comes the ſtifneſs of too many … all that can be ſaid to … them: and that they are … reproof, and think reprovers … wrong: and its well if it abate not Chriſtian love, and procure not ſome degree of hatred or diſpleaſure. Like a man that is entring into a conſumption, and takes it for an injury to be told ſo, till his languiſhing and decay convince him. p. 285Hence it is that we have all need to lament in general our unknown ſins, and ſay with David [Who can underſtand his errors? cleanſe thou me from ſecret faults.] Pſalm 19.12. Hence it is that we can ſeldom tell men of the moſt diſcernable faults, but they meet us with excuſes, and juſtifie themſelves.

There are few of us I think, that obſerve our hearts at all, but find both upon any ſpecial illumination, and in the hour of diſcovering tryals, that there were many diſtempers in our hearts, and many miſcarriages in our lives, that we never took notice of before. The Heart hath ſuch ſecret corners of uncleanneſs, ſuch myſteries of iniquity, and depths of deceitfulneſs, that many fearing God, are ſtrangely unacquainted with themſelves, as to the particular motions and degrees of ſin, till ſome notable providence, or gracious light aſſiſt them in the diſcovery. I think it not unprofitable here to give you ſome inſtances, of ſin undiſcerned by the ſervants of the Lord themſelves that have it, till the light come in that makes them wonder at their former darkneſs.

In General firſt obſerve theſe two. 1. The ſecret Habits of ſin, being diſcernable only p. 284by ſome acts, are many times unknown to us, becauſe we are under no ſtrong tempta…tion to commit thoſe ſins. And its a wonderfull hard thing for a man that hath little or no temptation, to know himſelf, and know what he ſhould do, if he had the temptations of other men. And O what ſad diſcoveries are made in the hour of temptation ▪ What ſwarms of vice break out in ſome like vermin that lay hid in the cold of Winter, and crawle about when they feel th… Summers heat! What horrid corruption which we never obſerved in our ſelves before, do ſhew themſelves in the hour o… temptation! Who would have though… that Righteous Noah had in the Ark … ſuch a heart, as would by careleſneſs … into the ſin of drunkenneſs? or that right…ous Lot had carried from Sodom the ſeed … drunkenneſs and inceſt in him? or th… David, a man ſo eminent in holineſs, and a man after Gods own heart, had … heart that had in it the ſeeds of Adultery and Murder? Little thought Peter, when he profeſſed Chriſt, Mat. 16.16. that the… had been in him ſuch carnality and unbelief, as would have ſo ſoon provoked Chriſt to ſay, Get thee behind me Satan, thou art an offenſe unto me: for thou … p. 285… not the things that be of God, but thoſe that … of men, ver. 22.23. And little did he think …hen he ſo vehemently profeſſed his reſolu…on rather to die with Chriſt then deny him, …at there had been then in his heart the … that would bring forth this bitter …it, Mat. 26.74, 75. Who knows whats …rtually in a ſeed, that never ſaw the tree, … taſted of the fruit?

Eſpecially when we have not only a …eedom from temptations, but alſo the moſt …werful means to keep under vitious habits, … hard to know how far they are mortified … the root. When men are among thoſe …at countenance the contrary vertue, and …here the vice is in diſgrace, and where …xamples of piety and temperance are ſtill …efore their eyes: If they dwell in ſuch …aces and company, where Authority and …riendſhip and Reaſon do all take part with …, and cry down the evil, no wonder … the evil that is unmortified in mens hearts, …o not much break out to their own or …thers obſervations through all this op…oſition. The inſtance of King Joaſh is fa…o…s for this: who did that which was …ight in the ſight of the Lord, all the dayes …f …ehojada the Prieſt that inſtructed him, 2 Kings 12.2. but after his death, when the p. 288Princes of Juda flattered him with their obeyſance, he left the houſe of God and ſerved Idols, till wrath came upon the land ▪ and was ſo hardened in ſin, as to murde… Zechariah the Prophet of God, and … of that Jehojada that had brought him out of obſcurity, and ſet him upon the Throne… even becauſe he ſpake in the name of the Lord againſt his ſin; 2 Chron. 24.20, 21, 22.

Who would have thought that it had been in the heart of Solomon, a man ſo Wiſe, ſo Holy, and ſo Solemnly engaged to God, by his publick profeſſions and works, to have committed the abominations mentioned, 1 Kings 11.4.?

If you ſay, that all this proveth not that there was any ſeed or root: of ſuch a ſin in the Heart before: but only that the temptation did prevail to cauſe the acts firſt, and then ſuch habits as thoſe acts did tend to; I anſwer; 1. I grant that temptations do not only diſcover what is in the heart, but alſo make it worſe when they prevail; and that is no full proof that a man had a proper habit of ſin before, becauſe by temptation he commits the act: For Adam ſinned by temptation without an antecedent habit. 2. But we know the nature of man to p. 289…e now corrupted; and that this corruption … virtually or ſeminally all ſin, diſpoſing …s to all; and that this diſpoſition is ſtrong …nough to be called a General Habit. When Grace in the ſanctified is called [A Na…ure] 2 Pet. 1.4. there is the ſame reaſon …o call the ſinfull inclination [a Nature] …oo; which can ſignifie nothing elſe then … ſtrong and rooted inclination. Knowing therefore that the Heart is ſo corrupted, we may well ſay when the evil fruit appears, that there was the ſeed of it before. And the eaſie and frequent yielding to the temptation, ſhews there was a friend to ſin within. 3. But if it were not ſo, yet that our hearts ſhould be ſo frail, ſo defectible, mutable, and eaſily drawn to ſin, is a part of Self-knowledge neceſſary to our preſervation, and not to be diſregarded. 4. I am ſure Chriſt himſelf tells us, that out of the heart proceed the ſins of the life, Mat. 15.19. and that the evil things of evil men come out of the evil treaſure of their hearts, Mat. 12.36. And when God permitted the fall of good King Hezekiah, the text ſaith [God left him to try him, that he might know all that was in his heart, 2 Chron. 32.31. that is, that he might ſhew all that was in his heart, ſo that the weakneſs and the remaining p. 288corruption of Hezekiahs hear… were ſhewn in the ſin which he committed.

2. And as the ſinful Inclinations are har… ly diſcerned, and long lie hid till ſo… Temptation draw them out; ſo the Act i… ſelf is hardly diſcerned in any of its mali… nity, till it be done and paſt, and the ſo… is brought to a deliberate review. Fo… while a man is in the act of ſin, either hi… underſtanding is ſo far deluded, as to think it no ſin in its kind, or none to him that then committeth it, or that its better venture on it then not, for the attaining of ſome ſeeming good, or the avoiding of ſome evil: or elſe the reſtraining act of the underſtanding is ſuſpended, and withdrawn; and it deſcerneth not practically the pernicious evil of the ſin, and forbiddeth not the committing of it, or forbids it ſo remiſly and with ſo low a voice, as is drowned by the clamour of contradicting paſſion: ſo that the prohibition is not heard. And how can it be then expected, that when a man hath not wit enough in uſe, to ſee his ſin ſo far as to forbear it, he ſhould even then ſee it ſo far as rightly to judge of himſelf and it? and that when Reaſon is low, and ſenſuality prevaileth, we ſhould p. 289then have the right uſe of Reaſon for ſelf-diſcerning? When a ſtorm of paſſion hath blown out the Light, and error hath extinguiſhed it, we are unlikely then to know our ſelves. When the ſenſual part is pleaſing it ſelf with its fobidden objects, that pleaſure ſo corrupts the judgement, that men will eaſily believe that it is lawfull, or that it is not very bad: So that ſin is uſually leaſt known and felt, when it is greateſt and in exerciſe, and one would think ſhould then be moſt perceptible. Like a phrenſie or madneſs, or other deliration, that is leaſt known when it is greateſt and moſt in act, becauſe its nature is deſtructive to the Reaſon that ſhould know it: Like a ſpot in the eye, that is it ſelf unſeen, and hindereth the ſight of all things elſe. Or as the deeper a mans ſleep is, the leſs he knoweth that he is a ſleep. Somnium narrare vigilantis eſt, ſaith Seneca. Its men awake that tell their dreams.

And thus you ſee that through ſelf-ignorance it comes to paſs, that both ſecret Habits, and the moſt open acts of ſin are ofttimes little known. A man that is drunk is in an unfit ſtate to know what drunkenneſs is: and ſo is a man that is in his paſſion: You will hardly bring him to p. 292repentance till it be allaid: And ſo is a man in the brutifying heat of luſt: or in the childiſh uſe of ſuch recreations as he doteth on … or in the ambitious purſuit of his deluding honours: And therefore abundance o… unknown ſin, may remain in a ſoul that laboureth not to be well acquainted with i… ſelf.

And as I have ſhewed you this in General, both of Habits and Acts of ſin; let us conſider of ſome Inſtances in particular, which will yet more diſcover the neceſſity of ſtudying our ſelves.

1. Little do we think what odious and dangerous errors may befall a perſon that now is orthodox! What a ſlippery mutability the mind of man is lyable unto! How variety of repreſentations cauſeth variety of apprehenſions: Like ſome pictures that ſeem one thing when you look on them on one ſide, and another thing when on another ſide; If you change your place; or change your light, they ſeem to change. Indeed Gods word hath nothing in it thus fitted to deceive: but our weakneſs hath that which diſpoſeth us to miſtakes: We are like an unlearned Judge, that thinks the cauſe is good which he firſt hears pleaded for, till he hear the confutation by the other party, and then p. 293he thinks the other hath the beſt cauſe, till perhaps he hear both ſo long, till he know not whoſe cauſe is the beſt: The perſon that now is a zealous lover of the Truth, (when it hath procured entertainment by the happy advantage of friends, acquaintance, Miniſters, Magiſtrates, or common conſent being on its ſide) may poſſibly turn a zealous adverſary to it, when it loſeth thoſe advantages: when a Miniſter ſhall change his mind, how many of the flock may he miſlead?

When you marry or contract any intimate friendſhip with a perſon of unſound and dangerous principles, how eaſily are they received?

When the ſtream of the times and authority ſhall change, and put the name of Truth on falſhood, how many may be, carried down the ſtream?

How zealous have many been for a faithfull Miniſtry, that have turned their perſecutors, or made it a great part of their Religion to revile them, when once they have turned to ſome Sect that is poſſeſt by the malicious ſpirit! (eſpecially the Papiſts and Quakers are famous for ſuch language of reproach: though the former excell the later much in the ſlandering part, and the later p. 294excell in the open bawling and incivility of ſpeech.)

And O that we could ſtop here, and could not remember you how faithfully and honeſtly ſome have ſeemed to love and obey the word of God, and to delight in the Communion of Saints, that by ſeducers have been brought to deny the divine authority of the Scriptures, and to turn their backs on all Gods publick Ordinances of Worſhip, and excommunicate themſelves from the Society of the Saints, and vilifie or deny the works of the ſpirit in them! Little did theſe men once think themſelves, whither they ſhould fall, under the conceit of riſing higher: And little would they have believed him that had told them, what a change they would make. Had theſe men known themſelves in time, and known what Tinder and Gunpowder was in their hearts, they would have walkt more warily, and its like have ſcap't the ſnare: but they fell into it, becauſe they feared it not. And they feared it not, becauſe they knew not or obſerved not, how prone they were to be infected.

2. Little do many think in their adverſity, or low eſtate, what ſeeds are in their hearts, which Proſperity would turn into very p. 295odious, ſcandalous ſins, unleſs their vigilancy, and a ſpecial preſervation do prevent it. Many a man that in his ſhop, or at his plough, is cenſuring the great miſcarriages of his Superiors, doth little think how bad he might prove, if he were in the place of thoſe he cenſureth. Many a poor man that freely talks againſt the Luxury, Pride and Cruelty of the Rich, doth little think how like them he ſhould be, if he had their temptations and eſtates. How many perſons that lived in good repute for humility, temperance and piety, have we ſeen turn proud, and ſenſual and ungodly, when they have been exalted! I would mention no mans caſe by way of inſulting or reproach: but by way of compaſſion, and in order to their repentance that ſurvive, I muſt ſay that this age hath given us ſuch lamentable inſtances as ſhould make all our hearts to ake and fear, when we conſider the crimes and their effects. Would the perſons that once walk't with us in the wayes of Peace and Concord, and Obedience, have believed that man that ſhould have fore-told them twenty years ago, how many ſhould be puffed up and deluded by ſucceſſes; and make themſelves believe by the ebullition of pride, p. 296that Victories authoriſed them to deny ſubjection to the higher powers, and by right or wrong to take down all that ſtood in their way, and to take the Government into their own hands, and to depoſe their rightfull Governours? never once vouchſafing to ask themſelves the queſtion that Chriſt asked, Luke 12.14. [Man, who made me a Judge, or a divider over you?] as if authority had been nothing but ſtrength, and he had the beſt right to Govern that could make the greateſt force to compell obedience. Little were the ſeeds of all this evil, diſcerned in the heart, before proſperity and ſucceſs did cheriſh them and bring them to that which with grief we have long obſerved. They would have ſaid as Hazael, Am I a dog that I ſhould do this? if one had told them before, that when God hath charged every ſoul to be ſubject on pain of condemnation, and they had vowed fidelity, they ſhould break all theſe bonds of commands and vows, and all becauſe they were able to do it: When they would not juſtifie him that ſhould do any miſchief to themſelves, and think it warrantable, becauſe he was able: when the Miniſters of the Goſpel, and their deareſt friends bore witneſs againſt the ſin, the heart could p. 297not by all this be brought to perceive its guilt; or that it was any ſin to overturn, overturn, overturn, till they had overturned all, and left not themſelves a bough to ſtand upon: And how hardly to this day, do the notable diſcoverings of God, and the plainneſs of his word, and the continued witneſs of his ſervants, prevail for kindly true Repentance! The unrighteous uſage of Magiſtracy and Miniſtry, and the licentious indulgence of the open enemies and revilers of both, and of all the Ordinances and Churches of the Lord, do proclaim aloud to all that that fear God [The depths and deceits of the heart are wonderfull, and you little think what an hour of temptation may diſcover in you, or bring you to: oh therefore know your ſelves, and fear, and watch.]

3. A man that in adverſity is touched with penitent and mortifying conſiderations, and ſtrongly reſolveth, how holily and diligently he will live hereafter, if he be recovered or delivered from his ſuffering, doth ofttimes little think what a treacherous heart he hath, and how little he may retain of all this ſenſe of ſin or duty, when he is delivered, and that he will be ſo much worſe then he ſeemed or promiſed, as that p. 298he may have cauſe to wiſh he had been afflicted ſtill. O how many ſick-bed promiſes are as pious as we can deſire, that wither away and come to almoſt nothing, when health hath ſcattered the fears that cauſed them! How many with that great impriſoned Lord, do, as it were, write the ſtory of Chriſt upon their priſon walls, that forget him when they are ſet liberty! How many are tender-conſcienced in a low eſtate, that when they are exalted, and converſe with great ones, do think that they may waſt their time in idleneſs and needleſs, ſcandalous recreations, and be ſilent witneſſes of the moſt odious ſins from day to day; and pray God be mercifull to them when they go to the houſe of Rimmon: and dare ſcarcely own a down-right ſervant, or hated and reproached cauſe of God! O what a preſervate would it be to us in proſperity, to know the corruption of our hearts, and forſee in adverſity what we are in danger of! We ſhould then be leſs ambitious to place our dwellings on the higheſt ground; and more fearfull of the ſtorms that there muſt be expected. How few are there (to a wonder) that grow better by worldly greatneſs and proſperity? Yea how few that held their own, and grow p. 299not worſe? And yet how few are there (to a greater wonder) that refuſe, or that deſire not this perilous ſtation, rather then to ſtand ſafer on the lower ground! Verily, the lamentable fruits of proſperity, and the mutability of men that make great profeſſions and promiſes in adverſity, ſhould make the beſt of us jealous of our hearts, and convince us that there is greater corruption in them, then moſt are acquainted with, that are never put to ſuch a trial. The height of proſperity ſhews what the man is indeed, as much as the depth of adverſity.

Would one have thought that had read of Hezekiahs earneſt prayer in his ſickneſs, and the Miracle wrought to ſignifie his deliverance (2 Kings 20.2, 3, 9.) and of his written ſong of praiſe, Iſa. 38. that yet Hezekiahs heart ſhould ſo deceive him, as to prove unthankful? You may ſee by his expreſſions his high reſolutions to ſpend his life in the praiſe of God, Iſa. 38.19, 20. [The living, the living he ſhall praiſe thee, as I do this day: The Fathers to the children ſhall make known thy truth. The Lord was ready to ſave me: therefore we will ſing my ſongs to the ſtringed inſtruments all the days of our life in the houſe of the Lord!] Would p. 300you think that a Holy man, thus rapt up in Gods praiſe, ſhould yet miſcarry, and be charged with ingratitude? And yet in 2 Chron. 32.25. it is ſaid of him [But Hezekiah rendered not again according to the benefit done unto him: for his heart was lifted up: therefore there was wrath upon him and upon Judah and Jeruſalem.] And God was fain to bring him to a review, and humble him for being thus lifted up: as the next words ſhew, ver. 26. Notwithſtanding Hezekiah humbled himſelf for the pride of his heart.] O Sirs, what Chriſtan that ever was in a deep affliction, and hath been recovered by the tender hand of mercy, hath not found how falſe a thing the heart is, and how little to be truſted in its beſt reſolutions, and moſt confident promiſes! Hezekiah ſtill remained a holy faithfull man: but yet thus failed in particulars and degrees. Which of us can ſay, who have had the moſt affecting and engaging deliverances, that ever our hearts did fully anſwer the purpoſes and promiſes of our afflicted ſtate▪ and that we had as conſtant ſenſible thanksgivings after, as our complaints and prayers were before. Not I; with grief I muſt ſay, Not I, though God hath tryed me many a time. Alas we are too like the de…itfull p. 103Iſraelites, Pſal. 78.34. When he ſlew …em, then they ſought him; and they return… and enquired early after God: and they …membred that God was their rock, and the … God their Redeemer. Nevertheleſs they did …tter him with their mouth, and they lyed …to him with their tongues: For their …art was not right with him, neither were …ey ſtedfaſt in his Covenant. Proſperity oft …ews more of the hypocriſie of the unſound, … the infirmity of the upright, then ap…ared in adverſity. When we feel the … reſolutions of our hearts to caſt off … ſin, to walk more thankfully and …uitfully and accurately with God then … have done, we can hardly believe that …er thoſe hearts ſhoul loſe ſo much of thoſe …fections and reſolutions as in a little time … find they do. Alas how quickly and … ſenſibly do we ſlide into our former in…nſibility, and into our dull and heavy …uitleſs courſe, when once the pain and …ar is gone! And then when the next …fliction comes, we are confounded and co…ered with ſhame, and have not the confi…ence with God in our prayers and cryes …s we had before, becauſe we are conſcious of our covenant-breaking and back…liding: and at laſt we grow ſo diſtruſtfull p. 302of our hearts, that we know not … to believe any promiſes which … make, nor how to be confident … any Evidence of grace that is in the… and ſo we loſe the comfort of our ſincer… and are caſt into a ſtate of too much h…vineſs and unthankfull denyal of our de…eſt mercies: And all this comes from … foul unexpected relapſes and coolings … declinings of the heart that comes not … to the promiſes we made to God in … diſtreſs.

But if Exaltation be added to Delivera… how often doth it make the Reaſon dru… ſo that the man ſeems not the ſame! If … ſee them drowned in Ambition or worl… cares or pleaſures; if you ſee how bol… they can play with the ſin that once th… would have trembled at; how powerf… fleſhly arguments are with them; … ſtrangely they now look at plainhea… zealous, heavenly Chriſtians, whoſe … they once deſired to be in; and how … they are aſhamed or afraid, to appear … for an oppoſed cauſe of Chriſt, or ope…ly to juſtifie the perſons that he juſtifieth▪ As if they had forgot that a day is comi… when they will be loth that Chriſt ſhou… be aſhamed of them, and refuſe to Juſtif… p. 303them, when the grand Accuſer is pleading for their condemnation. I ſay, if you ſee theſe men in their proſperity, would you not ask with wonder, Are theſe the men that lately in diſtreſs, did ſeem ſo humble, penitent and ſincere? that ſeemed ſo much above theſe vanities, that could ſpeak with ſo much contempt of all the glory and pleaſures of the world: and with ſo much pitty of thoſe vertiginous men, that they now admire.

O what pillars have been ſhaken by proſperity? what promiſes broken? what ſad eruptions of Pride and worldlineſs? What openings and ſad diſcoveries of heart, doth this alluring charming tryal make! And why is it that men know not themſelves when they are exalted, but becauſe they did not ſufficiently know themſelves, when they were brought low, nor ſuſpected enough the purpoſes and promiſes of their hearts, in the day of their diſtreſs!

4. We would little think, when the Heart is warmed and raiſed even to Heaven, in holy Ordinances, how cold it will grow again, and how low it will fall down? And when we have attained the cleareſt ſight of our ſincerity, we little think how quickly all ſuch p. 304apprehenſions may be loſt: and the miſjudging ſoul, that reckons upon nothin… but what it ſees, or feels at preſent, ma… be at as great a loſs, as if it had never pe…ceived any fruits of the ſpirit, or lineamen… of the Image of God upon it ſelf. Ho… confident upon good grounds is … an honeſt heart of its ſincerity? How ce…tain that it deſireth to be perfectly Holy ▪ 1. That it would be rid of the neareſt deare… ſin. 2. That it loves the Saints, 3. That … loves the light of the moſt ſearching Mini…ſtry. 4. And loveth the moſt practical ſanct…fying truths. 5. And loves the Miniſtry … means that have the greateſt and moſt power…full tendency to make themſelves more … (all which are certain evidences of ſince…rity.) How clearly may the Heart percei… all theſe, and write them down; and … ere long have loſt the ſight and ſenſe … them all, and find it ſelf in darkneſs an… confuſion, and perhaps be perſwaded th… all is contrary with them! And when they read in their Diary, or Book of Heart ac…counts, that at ſuch a day in examination they found ſuch or ſuch an Evidence, and ſuch a one at another, and many at a third▪ yet now they may be queſtioning whether all this were not deceit, becauſe it ſeem… p. 305…ontrary to their preſent ſight and feeling! …or it is preſent light that the mind diſcern…, by, and not by that which is paſt and …, and of which we cannot ſo eaſily …dge by looking back. They find in their …ccounts, At ſuch a time I had my ſoul …larged in ptayer; and at ſuch a time I …as full of Joy, and at another time I had …rong aſſurance, and boldneſs with God, … confidence of his love in Chriſt, and …oubted not of the pardon of all my ſins, … the Juſtification or acceptance of my …erſon: But now, no Joy, no Aſſurance, no …oldneſs, or confidence, or ſenſe of Love …nd pardon doth appear; but the ſoul …emeth dead and carnal and unrenewed: …s the ſame trees that in Summer are beau…fied with pleaſant fruits and flowers, in Winter are deprived of their natural ornaments, and ſeem as dead, when the life is …etired to the root. The ſoul that once …ould have defied the Accuſer, if he had …old him that he did not Love the brethren, …or Love the ſanctifying word and means, …or deſire to be Holy, and to be free from Sin, is now as ready to believe the accuſation, and will ſooner believe the tempter, …hen the Miniſter that watcheth for them … one that muſt give account: Yea now p. 306it will turn the Accuſer of it ſelf, and … as Satan, and falſly charge it ſelf with th… which Chriſt will acquit it of. (And … Chriſt be put to Juſtifie us againſt our ſelv… as well as againſt Satan?) The ſame wo… that a well compoſed believer hath in co…futing the calumnies of Satan, the ſa… hath a Miniſter to do in confuting the fa… accuſations of diſturbed ſouls againſt the… ſelves. And how ſubtile! how obſtina… and tenacious are they! as if they … learned ſome of the Accuſers art; ſuch … the uncharitable and malicious are, agai… their neighbours, in picking quarrels wi… all that they ſay or do, in putting the wo… conſtruction upon all, in taking ever… thing in the moſt uncharitable ſenſe, in a…gravating the evil, & extenuating the goo… in faining things againſt them that they … not guilty of, and denying or hiding all that commendable; juſt ſuch are poor diſquiete… ſouls againſt themſelves: ſo unjuſt, and … cenſorious, as that if they dealt as ill … others, they would have the more cauſe fo… ſome of theſe accuſations of themſelves.

And there is not a ſoul ſo high in jo… and ſweet aſſurance, but is lyable to fa… as low as this. And it makes our caſe to … much more grievous then otherwiſe it woul… p. 307be, becauſe we know not our ſelves in the hour of our Conſolations, and think not how apt we are to loſe all our joy, and what ſeeds of doubts and fears and grief …re ſtill within us, and what cauſe we have …o expect a change. And therefore when …o ſad a change befalleth us, ſo contrary …o our expectations, it ſurprizeth us with …error, and caſteth the poor ſoul almoſt …nto deſpair. Then cryeth the diſtreſſed …nner, [Did I ever think to ſee this …ay! Are my hopes and comforts come to …his! Did I think ſo long that I was a child …f God, and muſt I now perceive that he …iſowneth me! Did I draw near him as … my Father, and place my hope in his …elief! and now muſt my mouth be ſtopt with …nbelief, and muſt I look at him afar off, …nd paſs by the doors of mercy with deſpair! …s all my ſweet familiarity with the godly, …nd all my comfortable hours under the pre…ious means of grace, new come to this?] O how the poor ſoul here calls it ſelf … O vile apoſtate, miſerable ſinner! O that … had never lived to ſee this gloomy day! It …ad been better for me never to have known …he way of righteouſneſs, then thus to have …lapſed; and have all the prayers that I …ave put up, and all the Sermons I have p. 308heard, and the books that I have read, … aggravate my ſin and miſery.] O how ma…ny a poor Chriſtian in this dark miſ-judge…ing caſe, is ready with Job, to curſe the da… that he was born, and to ſay of it, Let it … darkneſs, let not God regard it from abo… neither let the light ſhine upon it: Let it … be joyned to the dayes of the year: let it … come into the number of the moneths:—…cauſe it ſhut not up the doors of the womb, … hid not ſorrow from mine eyes. Why dy… I not from the womb? Why did I not give … the ghoſt when I came out of the belly? … did the knees prevent me, or why the … that I ſhould ſuck? For now ſhould I ha… lain ſtill and been quiet — Wherefore is lig… given to him that is in miſery and life … the bitter in ſoul: which long for death, … it cometh not —which rejoyce …ceedingly, and are glad when they … find the grave. Why is light given … man whoſe way is hid, and whom God ha… hedged in! Job 3. Such are the lamentatio… of diſtreſſed ſouls that lately were as in th… arms of Chriſt. Their lives are a burde… to them; their food is bitter to them▪ their health is a ſickneſs to them: their l…berty is as a priſon to them; their deare… relations are become as ſtrangers; and … p. 309their comforts are turned into ſorrows; and the world ſeems to them as a howling wilderneſs; and themſelves as deſolate forſaken ſouls. They are ſtill as upon the Croſs, and will own no titles, but Vile, unworthy, loſt, undone, forlorn and deſolate; As if they had learnt no words from Chriſt, but [My God, my God, why haſt thou forſaken me!

And much of this comes from the Ignorance of our ſelves in the time of Peace and Conſolation. We are as David, Pſal. 30.6, 7. that ſaith [In my proſperity I ſaid, I ſhall never be moved: Lord, by thy favour thou haſt made my mountain to ſtand ſtrong: But thou hidedſt thy face and I was troubled.] One frown of God, or withdrawing the light of his countenance from us, would quickly turn our day into night, and cover as with ſack-cloth, and lay us in the duſt.

Take warning therefore dear Chriſtians, you that are yet in the Sun-ſhine of mercy, and were never at ſo ſad a loſs, nor put to groap in the darkneſs of miſtake and terror. No man is ſo well in health, but muſt reckon on it that he may be ſick. When you feel nothing but peace and quietneſs of mind, expect a ſtormy night p. 310of fears, that may diſquiet you: When you are feaſting upon the ſweet entertainments of your Fathers Love, conſider that feaſting is not like to be your ordinary dyet, but harder fare muſt be expected. Look on poor Chriſtians in ſpiritual diſtreſs with compaſſion: hear their ſad complaints, and the bills for Prayer which they here put up, and joyn in hearty prayer for them, and remember that this may prove your caſe. If you ſay, To what purpoſe ſhould you know before hand, how ſubject you are to this falling ſickneſs? I anſwer, Not to anticipate, or bring on your ſorrows; but if it may be to prevent them: or if that may not be, at leaſt to prevent the extremity and terror, and to be provided for ſuch a ſtorm. When you are now in health of body, and not diſabled by melancholy or other corruptions of your fantaſie, or paſſion, nor overwhelmed with the troubles of your mind, you have leiſure calmly to underſtand the caſe of ſuch miſ-judging and diſtreſſed ſouls: and accordingly you may avoid the things that cauſe it: and you may be furniſhed with right principles, and with promiſes, and experiences, and recorded evidences of grace, and when comfort is withdrawn, p. 311you may by ſuch proviſion underſtand, that God changeth not, nor breaks his Covenant, nor abates his Love, when your apprehenſions change: And that this is no ſign of a forſaken ſoul: and that the ceaſing of our feaſt, and withdrawing of the table is not a turning us out of the family. Expect ſome ſickneſſes, and you will the better know the uſe of the Phyſicion, and will lay up promiſes, and prepare your cordials: and this will prove an exceeding eaſe, when the hour of your tryal comes.

And what I have ſaid of the loſs of comfort, may be ſaid alſo of the diminiſhed and interrupted operations of all grace. We little think in the vigor of our holy progreſs, what falls and ſwonnings and languiſhings we may find. When you have acceſs with boldneſs in prayer unto God, and lively affections and words at will, and comfortable returns, remember that you may come to a ſadder caſe; and that many a true Chriſtian hath ſuch withdrawings of the spirit of prayer, as makes them think they are poſſeſſed with a dumb devil, and queſtion whether ever they prayed acceptably at all, and cannot ſo much as obſerve the groanings of the spirit in them, Rom. 8.26.

p. 312When you are warm and vigorous in the work of God; and find delight in all the ordinances, remember that you are ſubject to ſuch ſickneſſes as may take away your appetite, and make you ſay, I have no mind to hear, or read or pray: me thinks I feel no ſweetneſs in them! I was wont to go up with comfort to the houſe of God: I was glad when the Lords Day was come, or nigh: It did me good to ſee the faces of the Saints: O the meltings, the ſtrivings, the lively workings of ſoul that I have had in their ſweet communion! when they have preached and prayed as full of the Holy Ghoſt and of faith: But now I do but force my ſelf to duty: I go to prayer as againſt my will: I feel ſmall reliſh in the word of life.] O how many Chriſtians that little thought of ſuch a day, cry out that ſpiritual Death is upon them: that they are Dead to prayer, and dead to meditation, and dead to holy conference: and that once they thought they were dead to the world, and now they find they are dead to God. Underſtand before that you are lyable to this, and you may do much to prevent it: and if you ſhould fall into a ſickneſs and loſs of appetite, you may be able to difference it from death.

p. 313When you are ſweetly refreſhed at the Table of the Lord, and have there received a ſealed pardon as from Heaven into your boſoms, and have found delightfull entertainment with the Lord, remember that the day may come, when dulneſs and unbelief and fears may ſo prevail, as to make that an Ordinance of greateſt terror to you, and you may ſit there in trembling, leſt you ſhould eat and drink your own damnation: and you may go home in fears leſt Satan have there taken poſſeſſion of you, or leſt it have ſealed you up to wrath: or you may fly from that feaſt which is your due, and Chriſt invites you to, through fears leſt it belong not to you, and ſhould but harden you more in ſin: For, alas, this ſad and ſinfull caſe, is too oft the caſe of true believers, that little feared it in their ſpiritual proſperity. So that the very high expectations of ſuch workings of ſoul, which they cannot oft or ordinarily reach, and the fruſtrating of thoſe expectations, doth ſo often turn the Table of the Lord into the bitterneſs of wormwood, into diſtracting fears and troubles, that I cannot tell whether any other part of worſhip occaſion ſo much diſtreſs to many that are upright at the heart, as this p. 314doth, which is appointed for their ſpecial conſolation.

So when you are clear and vigorous in the Life of faith, and can abhor all temptations to unbelief, and the beams of ſacred Verity in the Scriptures have ſhewed you that it is the undoubted word of God, and you have quietly bottomed your ſoul on Chriſt, and built your hopes upon his promiſes, and can with a cheerfull contempt let go the world for the accompliſhment of your hopes; remember yet that there is a ſecret root of unbelief remaining in you, and that this odious ſin is but imperfectly mortified in the beſt: and that its more then poſſible that you may ſee the day when the tempter will aſſault you with queſtionings of the word of God, and trouble you with the injections of blaſphemous thoughts, and doubts, whether it be true or not! and that you that have thought of God, of Chriſt, of Heaven, of the Immortal ſtate of ſouls, with joy, and ſatisfied confidence, may be in the dark about them, affrighted with ugly ſuggeſtions of the enemy, and may think of them all with troubleſome diſtracting doubts, and be forced to cry with the Diſciples, Luke 17.5. Lord increaſe p. 315our faith: And as he Mark 9.24. Lord, I believe, help thou my unbelief. Yea worſe then ſo: ſome upright ſouls have been ſo amazed and diſtracted by the Tempter, and their diſtempered hearts, as to think they do not believe at all, nor yet are able ſincerely to ſay, Lord, help thou my unbelief.] When yet at that time, their Fears and their abſtaining from iniquity ſhew, that they Believe the Threatnings, and therefore indeed believe the word. Now if we did but throughly know our ſelves, when faith is in its exerciſe and ſtrength, and conſider whither the ſecret ſeeds of remaining unbelief may bring us, being fore-warned, we ſhould be fore-armed, and ſhould fortifie our faith the better, and be provided againſt theſe ſad aſſaults: And if the malignant ſpirit be ſuffered to ſtorm this fortreſs of the ſoul, we ſhould more manfully reſiſt: and we ſhould not be overwelmed with horror as ſoon as any hideous and blaſphemous temptations do aſſault us; (when Chriſt himſelf was not exempted from the moſt blaſphemous temptation, even the worſhipping of the Devil inſtead of God: though in him there was no ſinfull diſpoſition to entertain it, Mat. 4.9.10. John 14.30.)

p. 316O watch and pray, Chriſtians, in your moſt proſperous and comfortable ſtate! Watch and pray leſt ye enter into temptation: For you little think what is yet within you: and what advantage the deceiver hath, and how much of your own to take his part, and how low he may bring you both in point of Grace and Peace, though he cannot damn you.

I am troubled that I muſt tell you of ſo ſad a caſe, that even the children of God may fall into, leſt by troubling you with the opening of your danger, I ſhould do any thing to bring you into it. But becauſe ſelf-ignorance and not being before hand acquainted with it, may do much more, I have timely ſhewed you the danger with the remedy.

5. Another inſtance of the darkneſs even of a Heart that in part is ſanctified, is in the ſucceſſes of the temptations of Adverſity. When we want nothing, we think we value not the world, and we could bear the loſs of all. But when poverty or danger comes, what trouble and unſeemly whining is there, as if it were by a worldling that is deprived of his Idol, and all the portion that ever he muſt have. And by the ſhamefull moan and ſtir that we make for what p. 317we want, we ſhew more ſinfull overvaluing of it, and love to it, then before we obſerved or would believe. O how confidently and piouſly have I heard ſome inveigh againſt the Love of the world, as if there had been no ſuch thing in them; who yet have been ſo baſely dejected, when they have been unexpectedly ſtript of their eſtates, as if they had been quite undone!

How patiently do we think we could bear affliction, till we feel it! And how eaſily and piouſly can we exhort others unto patience, when we have no ſenſe of what they ſuffer! But when our turn is come, alas, we ſeem to be other men. Suffering is now another thing; and Patience harder then we imagined. And how inclinable are we to hearken to temptations, to uſe ſinfull means to come out of our ſufferings! Who would have thought that faithfull Abraham ſhould have been ſo unbelieving as to equivocate in ſuch a danger, and expoſe the chaſtity of his wife to hazzard, as we read in Gen. 12.12, 13, 19.? And that he ſhould fall into the ſame ſin, again on the ſame occaſion, Gen. 20. to Abimelech, as before he had done with Pharaoh! And that Iſaac ſhould after him fall into the ſame ſin, in p. 318the ſame place! Gen. 26.7. The Life o… Faith doth ſet us ſo much above the fear of man, and ſhew us the weakneſs and no…thingneſs of mortal worms, and the faith…fulneſs and al-ſufficiency of God, that o… would think the frowns and threatnings … a man ſhould ſignifie nothing to us, wh… God ſtands by, and giveth us ſuch amp… promiſes and ſecurity for our confirm…tion and encouragement: And yet wh… baſe dejectedneſs, and ſinfull compliance… are many brought to through the fear … man, that before the hour of this temp…tation, could talk as couragiouſly as any▪ This was the caſe of Peter, before mentioned: and of many a one that hath wounde… conſcience, and wronged their profeſſion by too cowardly a diſpoſition: which if it were fore-known, we might do more for our confirmation, and ſhould betake our ſelves in time to Chriſt in the uſe of means for ſtrength. Few turn their backs on Chriſt, or a good cauſe in time of tryal, that are jealous of themſelves before hand, and afraid leſt they ſhould forſake him: Few fall that are afraid of falling: But the ſelf-ignorant and ſelf-confident are careleſs of their way, and it is they that fall.

p. 3196. Another inſtance that I may give you, …, in the unexpected appearances of Pride … thoſe that yet are truly humble. Hu…ility ſpeaks in their confeſſions, aggrava…ng their ſin, and ſearching heart and life …r matter of ſelf-accuſation: They call …hemſelves Leſs then the leaſt of all Gods …ercies: They are ready with the woman of Canaan, Mat. 15.27. even to own the name …f dogs, and to confeſs themſelves unworthy …f the childrens crums, and unworthy to …read upon the common earth, or to …reath in the air, or to live upon the pati…nce and proviſions of God: They will …pend whole hours, and dayes of humilia…ion, in confeſſing their ſin, and bewail…ng their weakneſſes and want of grace, …nd lamenting their deſert of miſery: They …re oft caſt down ſo much too low, that they dare not own the title of Gods children, nor any of his ſpecial grace, but take themſelves for meer unſanctified hardened ſinners: and all that can be ſaid will not convince them that they have any ſaving intereſt in Chriſt: nor hinder them from pouring out unjuſt accuſations againſt themſelves. And all this is done by them in the uprightneſs of their hearts, and not diſſemblingly. And yet would you think, p. 320that with all this Humility, there ſhould be any pride? and that the ſame perſon ſhould lift up themſelves and reſiſt the… helps to further Humiliation? Do the… think in their dejections, that it is in the… hearts ſo much to exalt themſelves? I co…feſs many of them are ſenſible of the Pride, even to the increaſe of their humili…ty: and as it is ſaid of Hezekiah, do humb… themſelves for the pride of their hearts, … that Gods wrath doth not come upon them 2 Chr. 32.26. But yet too few are ſo we… acquainted with the power and rootedneſs o… this ſin at the heart, and the workings o… it in the hour of temptation, as they ſhould be. Obſerve it but at ſuch time… as theſe, and you will ſee that break forth▪ that before appeared not. 1. When … are undervalued and ſlighted, and meane… perſons preferred before us, and when our words and judgements are made light of, and our parts thought to be poor and low ▪ when any blot of diſhonour is caſt upo… us, deſerved or undeſerved; when we are ſlandered or reproached, and uſed with deſpight: what a matter do we make of it, and how much then doth our Pride appear in our diſtaſte and offence, and impatience! ſo that the ſame perſon that can p. 321…our out words of blame and ſhame againſt himſelf, cannot bear half as much from …thers without diſpleaſure and diſquietneſs of mind. It would help us much to know …his by our ſelves in the time of our humility, that we may be engaged to more watchfuleſs and reſiſtance of our pride.

2. When we are reproved of any diſgracefull ſin, how hardly goes it down, and how many excuſes have we? how ſeldom are we brought to downright penitent confeſſions? What ſecret diſtaſte is apt to be riſing in our hearts, againſt the reprover! And how ſeldom hath he that hearty thanks which ſo great a benefit deſerves! And would any think in our humilations and large confeſſions unto God, that we were ſo proud! To know this by our ſelves, would make us more ſuſpicious and aſhamed to be guilty of it.

3. When any preferment or honour is to be given, or any work to be done that is a mark of dignity, how apt are we to think our ſelves as fit for it as any, and to be diſpleaſed, if the honour or employment do paſs by us!

4. When we are admired, appladed, or exceſſively eſteemed and loved, how apt are we to be too much pleaſed with it? p. 322which ſheweth a proud deſire to be ſome body in the world: and that there is much of this venom at the bottom in our hearts even when we lay our ſelves in the duſt and walk in ſackcloth, and paſs the heavi…eſt judgement on our ſelves.

7. Another inſtance of our unacquaintedneſs with our hearts, and the latent undiſcerned corruption of them, is, our littl… diſcerning or bewailing thoſe ſecret maſter ſins, which lie at the root of all the reſt, and are the life of the old man, and the cauſe of all the miſcarriages of our lives▪ As 1. Ʋnbelief of the truth of the holy Scriptures, of the immortality of the ſoul, and the life of joy or miſery hereafter, and the other Articles of the Chriſtian faith: What abundance of Chriſtians are ſenſible of their unbelief as to the applying acts of faith that tend to their aſſurance of their own ſalvation, that are little ſenſible of any defect in the Aſſenting act, or of any ſecret root of unbelief about the truth of the Goſpel revelations: And yet, alas, it is this that weakeneth all our graces: It is this that feedeth all our wo! O happy men were we free from this! What prayers ſhould we put up! What lives ſhould we lead! how p. 323…atchfully ſhould we walk! with what …ntempt ſhould we look on the allure…ents of the world! with what diſ…in ſhould we think on fleſhly luſts! …th what indignation ſhould we meet the …mpter, and ſcorn his baſe unreaſonable …otions, if we did but perfectly believe the …ry truth of the Goſpel, and world to come! …ow carefull and earneſt ſhould we be, to …ake our calling and election ſure! How …reat a matter ſhould we make of ſin, and …f helps and hinderances in the way to …eaven! How much ſhould we prefer that …ate of life that furthereth our ſalvation, …efore that which ſtrengtheneth our ſnares …y furthering our proſperity and plea…ure in the world, if we were not weak or …anting in our belief of the the certain …erity of theſe things? Did we better know …he badneſs of our hearts herein, it would engage us more in fortifying the vitals, and …ooking better to our foundation, and wind…ng up this spring of faith, which muſt give life to all right motions of the ſoul.

2. How inſenſible are too many of the great imperfection of their love to God! What paſſionate complaints have we of their want of ſorrow for their ſin, and want of memory, p. 324and of ability to pray, &c. when their complaints for want of Love to God, and more affecting knowledge of him, are ſo col… and cuſtomary, as ſhews us they little obſerve the greatneſs of this ſinfull want▪ This is the very heart, and ſumm, and poy…ſon of all the ſins of our ſoul and life. S… much as a man Loves God, ſo much he i… Holy: and ſo much he hath of the ſpiri… and image of Jeſus Chriſt: and ſo much he hath of all ſaving graces: and ſo much he will abhor iniquity, and ſo much he wil… love the commands of God. As Love is the ſumm of the Law and Prophets, ſo ſhould it be the ſumm of our care and ſtudy through all our lives to excerciſe and ſtrengthen it.

3. How little are moſt Chriſtians troubled for want of Love to men! (to Brethren, neighbours and enemies) how cold are their complaints for their defects in this, in compariſon of other of their complaints! But is there not cauſe of as deep humiliation for this ſin, as almoſt any other? It ſeems to me that want of Love is one of the moſt prevalent diſeaſes among us, when I hear it ſo little ſeriouſly lamented. I oft hear people ſay, O that we could hear more attentively and affectionately, p. 325and pray more fervently, and weep for ſin more plenteouſly: But how ſeldom do I hear them ſay, O that we did love our Brethren more ardently, and our Neighbours and Enemies more heartily then we do, and ſet our ſelves to do them good! There is ſo little pains taken to bring the heart to the Love of others, and ſo few and cold requeſts put up for it, when yet the heart is backward to it, that makes me conclude that Charity is weaker in moſt of us then we obſerve. And indeed it appeareth ſo when it comes to tryal: to that tryal which Chriſt will judge it by at laſt, Mat. 25. When Love muſt be ſhewed by any ſelf-denyal, or coſtly demonſtration, by parting with our food and rayment, to ſupply the wants of others, and by hazarding our ſelves for them in their diſtreſs, then ſee how much we Love indeed! Good words coſt little: ſo cheap an exerciſe of charity as is mentioned, Jam. 2.15, 16. [Depart in peace, be warmed, and filled] is an inſufficient evidence of the life of grace; and will do as little for the ſoul of the giver, as for the Body of the receiver. And how little hazardous or coſtly Love is found among us, either to enemies, neighbours, or to Saints! Did we better know our hearts, there would p. 326be more care and diligence uſed to bring them to effectual fervent Love, then to thoſe duties that are of leſs importance; and we ſhould learn what this meaneth, I will have mercy and not ſacrifice, Mat. 9.13. & 12.7. which Chriſt ſets the Phariſees twice to learn. More inſtances of greateſt duties extenuated I might add, but I proceed.

8. Another inſtance of unobſerved corruption of the heart, is, The frequent and ſecret inſinuations of ſelfiſhneſs in all that we do toward God or man: When we think we are ſerving God alone, and have cleanſed our hearts from mixtures and deceit, before we are aware, ſelf-intereſt, or ſelf-eſteem, or ſelf conceit, or ſelf-love, or ſelf-will, or ſelf-ſeeking do ſecretly creep in and marr the work. We think we are ſtudying and preaching, and writing purely for God, and the common good, or the benefit of ſouls; and perhaps little obſerve how ſubtilly ſelfiſhneſs inſinuates, and makes a party, and byaſſeth us from the holy ends, and the ſimplicity and ſincerity which we thought we had carefully maintained: ſo that we are ſtudying and preaching, and writing for our ſelves, when we take no notice of it.

When we enter upon any office, or deſire p. 327preferment, or riches, or honour in the world, we think we do it purely for God, to furniſh us for his ſervice, and little think how much of ſelfiſhneſs is in our deſires.

When we are doing Juſtice, or ſhewing mercy, in giving alms, or exhorting the ungodly to repent, or doing any other work of Piety or Charity, we little think how much of ſelfiſhneſs is ſecretly latent in the bent and intention of the heart.

When we think we are defending the truth and cauſe of God, by diſputing, writing, or by the ſword; or when we think we are faithfully maintaining on one ſide order and obedience againſt confuſion and turbulent diſquiet ſpirits, or the Ʋnity of the Church againſt diviſion; or on the other hand that we are ſincerely oppoſing Phariſaicall corruptions and hypocriſie, and tyrannie, and perſecution, and are defending the purity of Divine worſhip, and the power and ſpirituality of religion; in all theſe caſes we little know how much of carnal ſelf may be ſecretly unobſerved in the work.

But above all others, Chriſt himſelf, and the Holy Ghoſt that ſearcheth the hidden things of the heart, hath warned one ſort p. 328to be ſuſpicious of their hearts; and that is, thoſe that cannot bear the diſſent and infirmities of their brethren in tolerable things, and thoſe that are calling for fire from heaven, and are all for force and cruelty in religion; for vexing, impriſoning, baniſhing, burning, hanging, or otherwiſe doing as they would not be done by, proportionably in their own caſe. He tells his two Diſciples, in ſuch a caſe] Ye know not what manner of ſpirit ye are of, Luke 9.55. As if he ſhould ſay, You think you purely ſeek my honour in the revenge of this contempt and oppoſition of unbelievers, and you think it would much redound to the propagation of the faith: and therefore you think that all this zeal is purely from my ſpirit: But you little know how much of … proud, a carnal, ſelfiſh ſpirit is in theſe deſires! You would fain have me and your ſelves with me to be openly vindicated by fire from heaven, and be ſo owned by Go… that all men may admire you, and you may exerciſe a dominion in the world; and you ſtick not at the ſufferings and ruine of theſe ſinners, ſo you may attain your end: but … tell you this ſelfiſh cruel ſpirit, is unlike my ſpirit which inclineth to patience, for…bearance and compaſſion.

p. 329So Rom. 14.1, 2, &c. & 15.1, 2. Him that is weak in the faith, receive ye — who art thou that judgeſt another mans ſervant? Why doſt thou judge thy brother, and why doſt thou ſet at nought thy brother? We ſhall all ſtand before the judgement ſeat of Chriſt. — Every one of us ſhall give account of himſelf to God — We then that are ſtrong, ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to pleaſe our ſelves. Let every one of us pleaſe his neighbour for his good to edification. So Gal. 6.1, 2. Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are ſpiritual reſtore ſuch a one in the spirit of meekneſs, conſidering thy ſelf leſt thou alſo be tempted. Bear ye one anothers burden, and ſo fulfill the Law of Chriſt.]

So alſo men are fouly and frequently miſtaken, when they are zealouſly contending againſt their faithfull Paſtors and their brethren, and vilifying others, and quenching love, and troubling the Church, upon pretence of greater knowledge or integrity in themſelves: which is notably diſcovered and vehemently preſt by the Apoſtle, James 3.1, &c. where you may ſee how greatly the judgement of the ſpirit of God concerning our hearts doth differ from mens judgement of themſelves. They that p. 330had a maſterly, contentious, envious zeal, did think they were of the wiſer ſort of Chriſtians, and of the higheſt form in the School of Chriſt; when yet the Holy Ghoſt telleth them that their wiſdom deſcended not from above, but was earthly, ſenſual and diveliſh, and that their envy and ſtrife doth bring confuſion, and every evil work: and that the wiſdom from above is neither unholy nor contentious, but firſt pure, and then peaceable, gentle and eaſie to be entreated, Jam. 3.17.

You ſee then how oft and dangerouſly we are deceived, by unacquaintedneſs with our ſelves; and how ſelfiſh carnal principles, ends and motives are oft mixed in the actions which we think are the moſt excellent for wiſdom, zeal, and piety that ever we did perform. O therefore what cauſe have we to ſtudy, and ſearch, and watch ſuch hearts, and not too boldly or careleſly to truſt them!

And it is not only Hypocrites that are ſubject to theſe deceitfull ſins, who have them in dominion, but true Believers that have a remnant of this carnal ſelfiſh principle continually offering to inſinuate and corrupt their moſt excellent works, and even all that they do.

p. 3319. The ſtrong eruption of thoſe paſſions that ſeemed to be quite mortified, doth ſhew that there is more evil lurking in the heart, then ordinarily doth appear. How calmly do we converſe together? how mildly do we ſpeak? till ſome provoking word or wrong do blow the coals, and then the dove appeareth to partake of a fiercer nature, and we can perceive that in the flame, which we perceived not in the ſpark. When a provocation can bring forth cenſorious, reviling, ſcornfull words, it ſhews what before was latent in the heart.

10. We are very apt to think thoſe affections to be purely ſpiritual, which in the iſſue appear to be mixed with carnality. Our very love to the Aſſemblies and ordinances of worſhip, and to Miniſters, and other ſervants of the Lord; to Books, and Knowledge; are ordinarily mixt; and good and bad are ſtrangely complicate, and twiſted together in the ſame affections and works. And the Love that beginneth in the ſpirit, is apt to degenerate into carnal Love, and to have too much reſpect to Riches, or Honour, or perſonage, or birth, or particular concernments of our own, and ſo it is corrupted, as Wine that turneth into Vinegar, before we are aware. And though ſtill p. 332there be uprightneſs of heart, yet too much Hypocriſie is joyned with it, when it is little perceived or ſuſpected.

And thus in ten Inſtances I have ſhewed you how much the ſervants of Chriſt themſelves may be miſtaken or unacquainted with their hearts; and how the work of mortification is hindered by this covering of ſo many ſecret unobſerved ſins.

But I muſt here deſire you to take heed of running into their extream, who hereupon conclude that their hearts being ſo dark and ſo deceitfull, are not at all to be underſtood; and therefore they are ſtill ſo ſuſpicious of the worſt, as that they will not be perſwaded of the grace that plainly worketh in them, and will condemn themſelves for that which they are not guilty of, upon ſuſpicion that they may be guilty and not know it: and think that all the ſin that they forbear, is but for want of a Temptation; and that if they had the ſame Temptations, they ſhould be as bad as any others.

I would intreat theſe perſons to conſider of theſe truths, for their better information. 1. Temptations do not only ſhew the evil that is in the heart, but breed much more, and turn a ſpark into a flame; as the p. 333…iking of the ſteel upon the flint doth by …e colliſion and tinder, make fire where was …ne. Adam was made a ſinner by temption.

2. There is no Chriſtian ſo mortified, but …th ſuch remnants of corruption and con…piſcence as would quickly bring forth …ynous ſins, if Temptations beyond ſtrength …ere let looſe upon him. What need you …re proof then the ſad inſtances of …oah, Lot, David, Solomon and Peter? It …d not prove that any of theſe were …aceleſs hypocrites before, becauſe they fell fouly by Temptations. And yet theſe …bjectors think they are graceleſs, becauſe …me ſtrong Temptation might make them …ll.

3. It is not Gods way of ſaving men, to …ve them ſo much inward Grace as no Temp…tion can overcome, but to preſerve and …ing them ſafe to heaven, by moral ſapi…tial conduct, together with internal …hanges of their hearts. And therefore he …epeth men from ſin, by keeping them from Temptations that are too ſtrong for them. …ll humane ſtrength is limited. And there …e none on earth have ſuch a meaſure of …race, but a Temptation may be imagined … ſtrong as to overcome them. And if p. 334God ſhould let Satan do his worſt, the… muſt be extraordinary aſſiſtances to pr…ſerve us, or we ſhould fall. Bleſs God he lead you not into Temptation, but deli… you from the Evil, by keeping you … enough from the ſnare. This is the … of preſervation that we are taught to … and hope for.

4. And therefore it is our own duty … keep as far from Temptations as we ca… and if we have Grace to avoid the ſin … avoiding the Temptation, we have ſuch Gr… as God uſeth for the ſaving of his ow… Not that he hath ſaving grace that wo… live wickedly if he were but tempted to … by thoſe ordinary tryals that humane …ture may expect: But the ſoul that p…ferreth God and Glory before the pleaſures … ſin for a ſeaſon, if it ſo continue, ſhall … ſaved, though poſſibly there migh have … a Temptation ſo ſtrong as would have co…quered the meaſure of grace that he ha… if it had not been fortified with new ſupplie… ▪ It is therefore more dotage in thoſe th… could find in their hearts to put themſelv… upon ſome Temptation, to try whether the… are ſincere by the ſucceſs. Avoid temptat…on, that you may avoid the ſin and puniſ…ment. Make not your ſelves worſe on pr…ence p. 335of diſcovering how bad you are. Put …ot Gunpowder or fuell to the ſparks of …orruption that ſtill remain in you, on …retence of trying whether they will burn. …ll men are defectible, and capable of every …, and muſt be ſaved from it by that Grace …hich worketh on nature according to that …ature, and prevaileth with Reaſon by …eans agreeable to Reaſon. If we think …e are wicked, becauſe we find that we …ave hearts that could be wicked, were they … alone, and becauſe we are not removed … far from ſin as to be uncapable of it, we …ay as well ſay Adam was wicked in his …nocency: much more David, Solomon and …eter before their falls. It is not he that …an ſin that ſhall be puniſhed: but he that …th ſin, or would ſin if he could, and had …ther have the ſin for its Pleaſure or Com…odity to the fleſh, then be free from it, and … Holy, in order to ſalvation, and the fa…our and pleaſing and enjoying of God in …ndleſs Glory.

5. Laſtly, Let ſuch perſons try themſelves by …heir conqueſt over the Temptations which …hey have, and not by imaginary conflicts with all that they think may poſſibly at any …ime aſſault them. You have ſtill the ſame …eſh to deal with, and the ſame world and p. 336devil that will not let you go to heaven without Temptation: If the Temptations which you have already, keep you not from pre…ferring the Love and fruition of God befor… the Pleaſure of the Fleſh; and a life of fait… and Holineſs, before a life of infidelity an… impiety and ſenſuality, ſo that you ha… rather live the former then the latter, I a… ſure then your Temptations have not kep… you from a ſtate of grace. And you ma… be aſſured, that for the time to come, … you watch and pray, you may eſcape th… danger of temptation; and that God wil… increaſe your ſtrength if he increaſe you… tryals: Be not ſecure, be you never ſo Holy ▪ Think not that you have nature that cannot ſin, or cannot be tempted to a love … ſin: But let him that thinketh he ſtandeth, take heed leſt he fall. There hath no temptation taken you, but ſuch as is moderate, or common to man: but God is faithfull, who wil… not ſuffer you to be tempted above that you are able; but will with the temptation alſ… make a way to eſcape, that ye may be able t… bear it, 1 Cor. 10.13.

And thus I have ſhewed you how ſelf-ignorance hindereth the conqueſt and mortifying of ſin, even in the Godly, and now ſhall add ſome further motives.

p. 3372. Not knowing our ſelves, and the ſe…ret corruptions of our hearts, doth make ſin ſurprize us the more dangerouſly, and break forth the more ſhamefully, and wound our conſciences the more terribly. The unſuſpected ſin hath leſt oppoſition, and when it breaks out doth like an unobſerved fire, go far before we are awakened to quench it. And it confoundeth us with ſhame, to find our ſelves ſo much worſe then we imagined. It overwhelmeth the ſoul with deſpairing thoughts to find it ſelf ſo bad, when it thought it had been better. It breedeth endleſs ſuſpicions and fears, when we find our former opinions of our ſelves confuted, and that contrary to our expectations we are ſurprized where we thought we had been ſafe: we are ſtill ready to think what ever we diſcern that is good within us, that we may as well be miſtaken now as we were before. And thus our preſent ſelf-ignorance when diſcovered, may hinder all the comforts of our lives.

3. Laſtly, not knowing our ſelves, and our particular ſins and wants, and weakneſſes, doth keep us from a particular application of the promiſes, and from ſeeking thoſe particular Remedies from Chriſt, which our caſe requireth: and ſo our mercies p. 338lie by neglected, while we need them an… do not underſtand our need.

And thus I have ſhewed you why yo… ſhould labour to know your ſinfulneſs.