Directions and Persuasions to a Sound Conversion, Direction 10
DIRECT. X. My next Advice that you may prove sound Converts, is this: [Rest not, and count not your selves truly Converted, till God and his holy Waies have your very Love, and Desire, and Delight: and take not that for a saving Change, when you had rather live a worldly ungodly life, if it were not for the fear of punishment.]
I shall speak but little of this, because I toucht upon it before, when I told you that Christ must have your hearts, and because it is but a consectary of the last, or contained in it. But yet I think it best to present it here distinctly to your Consideration, because a slavish kind of religiousness, doth deceive so many; and because the life of Grace is here exprest. I deny not but holy Fear is e…ceeding usefull to us; even a Fear of the Threatnings and Judgments of God. But yet I must tell you, that in Fear there is much more that is common to the unsanctified, then there is in Love, Desire and Delight. Though the Fear of God be the beginning of wisdom, it is Love that is the Perfection: and that Fear is not filial, and of the right strain, if Love be not its Companion. Fear of punishment shews that you love your natural selves: but it shews not that you love God, and are true-hearted to him. The Devils fear and tremble, but they do not Love. It is Love and and not Fear that is the Byas, the Inclination, and, as I may say, the Nature of the will of man By his Love it is that you must know what the man is. The Philosopher saith, [Such as a man is, such is his end] which is all one as to say, [Such as a man is, such is his Love.] You may Fear a thing at the same time when you hate it: and it's too common to have some hatred mixt with Fear. You may be as much against God and his holy waies, when Fear only drives you to some kind of religiousness, as others are that scarce meddle with Religion at all. The first thing that God looks at is, what you would do; and the next is, what you do. If you do it, but had rather leave it undone, you lose your reward, and God will take it as if you had not done it: For it was not you that did it, if you did it not from Love; but it was Fear that dwelleth in you. God takes mens hearty Desires and Will, instead of the Deed, where they have not power to fulfill it: But he never took the bare Deed instead of the Will. A blockish kind of worship, consisting in outward actions, without the heart, is fit to be given to a wooden god, a sensless Idol: but the true and living God abhorres it. He is a Spirit, and will be worshiped in Spirit and in Truth: such worshipers he seeketh, and such he will accept, Joh. 4. 23, 24. A begger will be glad of your Almes, though you leave it with an ill will; because he needeth it: but God hath no need of you, nor of your service, and therefore think not that he will accept you on such termes. That people worshipeth God in vain, that draw near him with their mouth, and honour him with their lips, when their heart is farre from him, Mat. 15. 8, 9. A mans heart is where his Love is, rather then where his Fear is. If you should lie still upon your knees, or in the holy Assembly; If you should be the strictest Observer of the Ordinances on the Lords daies; and yet had such hearts in you, as had rather let all these alone, if it were not for fear of punishment; it will all be disregarded, and reckoned to you according to your wills, as if it had never been done by you at all. It's Love that must win Love, or make you fit for Love to entertain. If you give your goods to the poor, or your bodies to be burned in a cause that in it self is good, and yet have not Love, it availeth nothing, 1 Cor. 13. 1, 2, 3, 5. You will not think your Wife hath conjugall affections that loveth another man better then you, and had rather be gone from you, if she could live without you. It's an unnatural Son that loves not his Father, but had rather be from him, then with him. If God called you to a bestiall drugery or slavery, he would then look but for your work, and not care much whether you be willing or unwilling. If your Ox draw your plow, and your Horse carry his burden, you care not much whether it be willingly or unwillingly. Or if it be an enemy that you have to deal with, you will look for no more then a forced submission, or that he be disabled from doing you hurt. But this is not your case: It is a state of friendship that the Gospel calls you to: you must be nigh to God; his Children; and the Members of his Sonne; espoused to him in the dearest strongest bonds: And do you think it is possible that this should be done without your wills and affections? If you can be content with the Portion of a slave and an enemy, then do your task, and deny God your affections: But if you look for the entertainment and Portion of a Friend, a Child, a Spouse; you must bring the heart of a Friend, and of a Child, and of a Spouse. Fear may do good by driving you to the use of means; and taking out of your hands the things by which you would do your selves a mischief: It may prepare you for saving Grace; and when you are sanctified, it will prove a necessary servant of Love; to keep you in awe, and save you from temptations. But Love is the ruling affection in the sanctified; and fear is therefore necessary because of the present imperfection of Love, and because of the variety of temptations that here beset us: Think not therefore that you are savingly renewed, till God have your very hearts. When you do but believe and tremble, it is better then to be unbelieving, and stupid, and secure: but you are not true Christians till you believe and Love. We use to fly from that which we fear, and therefore do apprehend it to be evil to us. We avoid the presence and company of those that we are afraid of, but we draw nigh them that we love, and delight in their company. We Fear an Enemy: We Love a Friend: We Fear the Devil naturally; but we do not Love him: It is Love that is that Affection of the soul that entertaineth God as God, even as Good: though that Love must be accompanied with a filial fear, even a dread and reverence of his Majesty and greatness, and a fear of displeasing him. If you should toile out your selves in Religious duties, with a heart that had rather forbear them, if you durst, you have not the hearts of Gods Children in your breasts. The Magistrate can frighten men to the Congregation and outward worship: You may lock a man in the Church, that had rather be away: And will any man think that this makes him acceptable to God? You may keep a Theif from stealing by prison and irons; but this makes him not accepted with God as a true man: You may cure a man of cursing, and swearing, and railing, and idle and ribbald talking, even in a minute of an hour, by cutting of his tongue: but will God accept him ever the more as long as he hath a heart that would do it if he could? There's abundance of people at this day that are kept from abusing the Lords day, and from swearing, and stealing, yea and from laying hands on all about them that are godly, and this by the Law of man, and the fear of present punishment: And do you think that these are therefore innocent or acceptable with God? By this account you may make the Devil a Saint, when he is chained up from doing mischief: You may as well say, that a Lyon is become a Lamb, when he is shut up in his Den: Or that a mastiff Dog is become harmelss and gentle, when he is muzled. Believe it sirs, you are never Christians, till you see that in God that winnes your hearts to him, so that you would not change your Master for any in the world; and till you see that in the Hopes of Everlasting Glory, that you would not change it for any thing else that can be imagined by the heart of man; And till you see that goodness in a heavenly life, that you had rather live it, then any life in the world: You are not converted to God indeed, till you had rather live in Holiness then in Sinne, if you had your freest choice; and till you would gladly be the strictest holiest persons that you know in the world; and long after more and more of it, and fain would reach Perfection it self: For though we cannot be perfect here, yet no man is upright that desireth not to be perfect. For he that loveth Holiness as Holiness, must needs love the greatest measure of Holiness, with the greatest Love. This is it that maketh sound Converts to be so faithfull and constant with God: A man is forward and ready to a work that he loves, when he draws back from it, as if it were a mischief, that hath no mind to do it. A man is hardly kept from the persons, and places, and employments that he loves: but a little will withdraw him from that which he loveth not. Why is it that we have so much adoe to take off a Drunkard from his Companions and his lusts, but because he loves them better then temperance and gracious company? And why can we so hardly draw the lustfull wretch from his filthy lusts, or the glutton, or the idle sensuall person from his needless or ezcessive recreations, but because they love them? And why is it that you cannot draw the worldling from his covetousness, but he parteth with his money almost as hardly as with his blood, but because he loveth it? And therefore what wonder if temptations be resisted, and the fairest baits of the world despised, by him that is truly in Love with God: No wonder if nothing can turn back that man from the way to Heaven, that is in Love both with Heaven and with the Way. No wonder if that man stick close to Christ and never forsake a holy life, that tafteth the sweetness of it, and feels its to do him good, and had rather go that way then any in the world. There is no true Christian but can say with David, that a day in Gods Courts is better then a thousand, and he had rather be a door-keeper in the house of God, then to dwell in the tents, [yea, or the Pallaces] of wickedness. Do but mark those Professors that prove Apostates, and sorfake the way of godliness which they seemed to embrace, and see whether they be not such as either took up some bare Opinions and outward Duties, upon a flash of superficial illumination, or else such as were frightned into a course of Religion, and so went on from duty to duty for fear of being damned, when all the while their hearts were more another way, and they had rather have been excused. These hypocrites are they that are disputing so oft the Obligations to their Duty, and asking, How do you prove that it is a Duty to pray in my Family, or a Duty to observe the Lords Day, or to come constantly to the Congregation, or to use the Communion of the godly in private meetings, or to repeat Sermons, or sing Psalms, and the like? Intimating that they are as Birds in a Cage, or Hens in a Pen, that are boaring to get out, and had had rather be at liberty: If it were not for the fear of the Law of God that is upon them, they had rather let all these Duties alone, or take them up but now and then at an idle time, when Satan and the flesh will give them leave. If a Feast be prepared and spread before them, a good stomack will not stand to ask; How can you prove it my duty to eat? but perhaps the sick that loath it, may do so. If the Cup be before the Drunkard, he doth not stand on those termes [How do you prove it my duty now to drink this Cup, and the other Cup] No, if he might have but leave, he would drink on, without any questioning whether it be a duty: If the Gamester, or the Whoremonger, might but be sure that he should scape the punishment, he would never stick at the want of a Precept, and ask, Is it my duty? If there were but a gift of twenty pound a man, to be given to all the poor of the Town, yea and to all the people in generall, I do not think I should meet with many people in the Town that would draw back and say, What Word of God commandeth me to take it? Or how can you prove that it is my duty? And why is all this? but because they have an inward Love to the thing; and Love will carry a man to that which seemeth good for him, without any command, or threatning. If these ungodly wretches had one sparke of spiritual life within them, and any taste and feeling of the matters that concern their own salvation, instead of asking, How can you prove that I must pray with my Family, or that I must keep the Lords day, or that I must converse with the godly, and live a holy life? they would be readier to say, How can you prove that I may not pray with my Family? and that I may not sanctifie the Lords Day? and that I may not have Communion with the Saints in Holiness? Seeing so great a mercy is offered to the world, why may not I partake of it as well as others? I can perceive in many that I converse with, the great difference between a heart that loves God and Holiness, and a heart that seemes religious and honest without such a Love. The true Convert perceiveth so much sweetness in holy Duties, and so much spiritual advantage by them to his …oul, that he is loath to be kept back; he cannot spare these Ordinances and Mercies, no more then he can spare the bread from his mouth, or the cloathes from his back; yea, or the skin from his flesh, no nor so much. He loveth them; he cannot live without them; at the worst that ever he is at, he had rather be holy then unholy, and live a godly then a fleshly worldly life. And therefore if he had but a b…re leave from God, without a Command, to sanctifie the Lords Day, and to live in the holy Communion of the Saints, he would joyfully take it, with many thanks: For he need not be driven to his rest when he is weary, nor to his spiritual food when he is hungry, nor to Christ the re…uge of his soul, when the curse and accuser are pursuing him. But the unsanctified hypocrite, that never loved God or Godliness in his heart, he stands questioning and enquiring for some proof of a necessity of these courses. And if he can but bring himself to hope that God will save him without so much adoe (which by the help of the Devil he may easily be brought to hope,) away then goes the duty: If you could not shew him that there is a Necessity of Family Prayer, and a Necessity of sanctifying the Lords Day, and a Necessity of forsaking his tipling and voluptuousness, and a Necessity of living a heavenly life, he would quickly resolve of another course: For he had rather do otherwise, if he durst. He never was Religious from a true Predominant Love to God and a holy life, but for fear of Hell, and for other inferiour respects.
Remember this when you have precious opportunities before you, of doing or receiving good, and when you see that you have leave to take these opportunities, and yet you draw back, and are questioning, How we can prove it to be your duty; or that you cannot be saved without it? Do not these Questions plainly shew that you Love not the work, and Delight not in a holy life; and that you had rather let it alone? Are you not blind if you see not this is in your selves? Yea, it's plain that you have such an aversness or hatred to God and a holy course of life, that if you did but know what shift to make to scape damnation, you would fly away from God and Holiness, and have as little to do with them as you can. Your Questions and Cavils do plainly declare this wicked emnity and backwardness of your hearts: and consequently shew how farre you are from true Conversion.
Not that I am of their mind that think there is any Good which the Law of Christ Obligeth us not to accept, and which we can refuse without sinne and danger to our selves: For God doth both draw us, and drive us at once. But when the Threatning and Punishment only can prevail with men, and men Love not God and Godliness for themselves, but had rather have liberty to live as the ungodly, I shall never take one of these for a sanctified man, nor have any hope of the saving of such a soul, how farre soever his fears may carry him from his outward sinnes, or to outward duties: Till God shall give him a better Conversion then this, I say, I have not the smallest hope of this mans salvation. Then you are Gods, Children, when the Honour, the Work, the Family, the Name of your Father are lovely and delightfull to you: And when you grieve that there is any remnants of sin in your souls; and when your sinnes are to you as lameness to the lame, that pain them every step they go; and as sickness to the sick, that makes them groan and groan again, and long to be rid of it: And when you think those the happiest men on earth that are the most holy, and wish from your hearts that you were such as they, though you had not a house to put your head in: When you look towards God with longing thoughts, and are grieved that your understandings can reach no nearer him, and know no more of him, and that your hearts cannot embrace him with a more burning Love: When you admire the beauty of a meek, a patient, a mortified, spirituall, heavenly mind, and long to have more of this your self, yea to be perfect in all Holiness and Obed…ence: When your hearts are thus brought over to God, that you had rather have him then any other, and rather live in his Family then any where, and rather walk in his waies then in any, then are you indeed Converted, and never till then, whatever other dispositions you may have.
And now if that were my business, what abundance of reason might I shew you, to make you willing to come over unto God, with Love, and with Delight. Whom else can you Love, if he that is Love it self seem not lovely to you. All loveliness is in him and from him: The creature hath none of it self, nor for it self: To Love a life of sinne, is to Love the Image and Service of the Devil, and to Love that which feeds the flames of Hell: What is it then to Love this sinne so well, as for the Love of it to fly from God and Godliness? Methinks men at the worst should Love that which will do them good, and not preferre that before it which will hurt them. Do sinners indeed believe that God and Holiness will do them hurt, and that sinne will do them greater good? Is there ever a man so mad that he dare speak this and stand to it? If indeed you think it best to live in sinne, and therefore had rather keep it then leave it, your understandings are befooled, I had almost used Paul's Phrase, and said, bewitched, Gal. 3. 1. Will it do you any hurt to leave your beastly sensual lives, and to live soberly, righteously, and godly in the world, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, and looking for the blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Saviour Jesus Christ? This is the Doctrine of Saving Grace, Tit. 2. 11, 12, 13. Would it do you any harm to be assured of Salvation, and ready to die, and to know that the Angels shall Conduct your departing souls to Christ, and that you shall live in Joy with him for ever? Or to be employed in those holy works that must prepare you for this day, and help you to this assurance. If God be naught for you, if Holiness, and Righteousness, and Temperance be naught for you, then you may as well say, Heaven is naught for you; and therefore you must resolve for sinne and Hell, and see whether that be good for you. I shall say no more of this Point, because I have written of it already, in the Conclusion of the Saints Rest, which I desire you to peruse.