Micro-Cosmography, Part 52 – Part 54
53. Pauls Walke.
IS the Lands Epitome, or you may call it the lesser Ile of Great Brittaine. It is more then this, the whole worlds Map, which you may here discerne in it's perfect'st motion iustling and turning. It is a heape of stones and men, with a vast confusion of Languages, and were the Steeple not sanctifyed nothing liker Babel. The noyse in it is like that of Bees, a strange humming or buzze, mixt of walking, tongues, and feet: It is a kind of still roare or loud whisper. It is the great Exchange of all discourse, & no busines whatsoeuer but is here stirring and a foot. It is the Synod of all pates politicke, ioynted and laid together in most serious posture, and they are not halfe so busie at the Parliament. It is the Anticke of tailes to tailes, and backes to backes, and for vizards you need goe no further then faces. It is the Market of young Lecturers, whom you may cheapen here at all rates and sizes. It is the generall Mint of all famous lies, which are here like the legends of Popery, first coyn'd & stampt in the Church. All inuentions are emptyed here, and not few pockets. The best signe of a Temple in it is, that it is the Theeues Sanctuary, which robbe more safely in the Croud, then a wildernesse, whilst eueryevery searcher is a bush to hide them. It is the other expence of the day, after Playes, Tauerne, and a Baudy-House, and men hauehave still some Oathes left to sweare here. It is the eares Brothell, and satisfies their lust, and ytch. The Visitants are all men without exceptions, but the principall Inhabitants and possessors, are stale Knights, and Captaines out of Seruice, men of long Rapiers, and Breeches, which after all turne Merchants here, and trafficke for Newes. Some make it a Preface to their Dinner, and Trauell for a Stomacke: but thriftier men make it their Ordinarie: and Boord here verie cheape. Of all such places it is least haunted with Hobgoblins, for if a Ghost would walke more, hee could not.
54. A Vniuersitie Dunne.
IS a Gentlemans follower cheaply purchas'd, for his own money ha's hyred him. Hee is an inferiour Creditour of some ten shillings or downwards, contracted for Horse-hire, or perchance for drinke, to weake to bee put in Suite. and he arrests your modesty. Hee is now very expensiue of his time, for hee will waite vponupon your Staires a whole Afternoone, and dance attendance with more patience then a Gentleman-Vsher. Hee is a sore beleaguerer of Chambers, and assaults them sometimes with furious knockes: yet finds strong resistance commonly, and is kept out. Hee is a great complayner of Schollers loytering, for hee is sure neuer to find them within, and yet hee is the chiefe cause many times that makes them studie. He Grumbles at the in Gratitude of men, that shunne him for his kindnesse, but indeed it is his owne fault, for hee is too great an vpbrayder. No man put them more to their braine then hee: and by shifting him off they learne to shift in the world. Some choose their roomes a purpose to auoide his surprizals, and thinke the best commoditie in them his Prospect. Hee is like a reiected acquaintance, hunts those that care not for his company, and hee knowes it well enough; and yet will not keepe away. The sole place to supply him is the Butterie, where hee takes grieuous vse vponupon your Name, and hee is one much wrought with good Beere and Rhetoricke. He is a man of most vnfortunate voyages, and no Gallant walkes the streets to lesse purpose.
55. A stayed Man.
IS a man. One that ha's taken order with himselfe, and set a rule to those lawlesnesses within him. Whose life is distinct and in Method, and his Actions as it were cast vp before. Not loos'd into the Worlds vanities, but gathered vp and contracted in his station. Not scatter'd into many pieces of businesses, but that one course he takes, goes thorough with. A man firme and standing in his purposes, nor heau'd off with each wind and passion. That squares his expence to his Coffers, and makes the Totall first, and then the Items. One that thinkes what hee does, and does what he sayes, and forsees what he may doe, before he purposes. One whose (if I can) is more then anothers assurance, and his doubtfull tale before some mens protestations. That is confident of nothing in futurity, yet his coniectures oft true Prophecies. That makes a pause still betwixt his …are and beleefe, and is not too hasty to say after others: One whose Tongue is strung vp like a Clocke till the time, and then strikes, and sayes much when hee talkes little. That can see the Truth betwixt two wranglers, and sees them agree euen in that they fall out vponupon. That speakes no Rebellion in a brauery, or talkes bigge from the spirit of Sacke. A man coole and temperate in his passions, not easily betraid by his choller: That vies not oath with oath, nor heat with heat: but replies calmly to an angry man, and is too hard for him too. That can come fairely off from Captaines companies, and neither drink nor quarrell. One whom no ill hunting fends home discontented, and makes him sweare at his dogs and family. One not hasty to pursue the new Fashion, nor yet affectedly true to his old round Breeches. But grauely handsome, & to his place, which suites him better then his Tailor. Actiue in the world without disquiet, and carefull without miserie: yet neither ingu… in his pleasures, nor a seeker of businesse, but ha's his houres for both. A man that seldome laughes violently, but his mirth is a cheerefull looke. Of a compos'd end setled countenance, not set, nor much alterable with sadnesse or ioy. He affects nothing so wholy, that hee must bee a miserable man when he loses it: but forethinks what will come hereafter, and spares Fortune his thanks and curses. One that loues his Credit, not this word Reputation; yet can saue both without a Duell: whose entertainments to greater men are respectfull not complementary, and to his friends plaine not rude. A good Husband, Father, Master: that is without doting, pampring, familiarity. A man well poys'd in all humours, in whom Nature shwed most Geometry, and hee ha's not spoyl'd the worke. A man of more wisedome then wittinesse, and braine then fancy; and abler to any thing then to make Verses.
FINIS.
End of the text · John Earle, Micro-Cosmography (1628)