Two Treatises, Treatise 1 · Chapter 15
CHAP. XV.
The laſt Motive to a good conſcience; The miſery of an evill one.
THe laſt Motive remaines, and that is, The fift motive to a good conſcience.The horrour and miſery of an evill Conſcience. If men did but truly know what the evill of an evill conſcience were, and how evill a thing, and bitter it will be when conſcience awakens here, or ſhall bee awakened in hell, a little perſwaſion ſhould ſerve to move men to live in a good conſcience. We may ſay of the evill conſcience, as Solomon ſpeakes of the drunkard, Pro. 23. 29. Who hath woe? who hath ſorrow? who hath contentions? who hath wounds, but not without a cauſe? Even the man whoſe conſcience is not good, even he that liues in an evill conſcience.
An evill conſcience, how miſerable it is, we may ſee by conſidering the miſerie thereof, either in this world, or the world to come.
1. In this life. When an evill conſcience is awakened in this life, the ſorrow and ſmart, the horror and terror is, as the joy of a good conſcience, unſpeakable. An evil conſcience in this life is miſerable, in regard of feare, perplexity, and torment. To live in a continuall feare, and to have a mans heart alwaies in ſhaking fits of feare, is miſery of miſeries. And ſuch is the miſery of an evill conſcience. Prov. 28. 1. The wicked flees when none purſues. OnelyOnly his owne guilt purſues him, and makes him flee. His owne guilt cauſes a ſound of feare in his eares, Iob 15. 21. Which makes Proprium autem eſt nocentium trepidare. Male de nobis actum erat, quod multa ſeelera legem & judicem effugiunt, & ſcripta ſupplicia niſi illa naturalia & gravia de preſentibus, ſolverent & in locum patientiae timor cederet. Sonec. ep. 91.him ſhake at the noiſe of a ſhaken leafe, Levit. 26. 36. yea, that ſo ſcares him that terrours make him afraid on every ſide, and drive him to his feet, Iob 18. 11. Yea, there are they in great feare where no feare is, Pſ. 53. 3. So that a man with an evill conſcience awakened, may be named as Paſhur is, Ier. 20. 3. Magor-Miſſabib, feare round about, as being a terror to himſelfe, and to all his friends, ver. 4.
An evill conſcience, even makes thoſe feare fearefull feares, of whom all other ſtand in feare. How potent a Monarch, and how dreadfull a Prince was Belſhazzar, who was able to put him into any feare, whom all the earth feared? And yet when his guilty conſcience lookes him in the face, awakened by the palme writing on the wall, ſee where his courage is then, Dan. 5. 6. Then the Kings countenance was changed, and his thoughts troubled him, ſo that the joynts of his loynes were looſed, and his knees ſmote one againſt another. Who would have had his feare to have had his kingdome? Let him now cloath himſelfe with all his Majeſtie, let him looke and ſpeak as terribly as he can, let him threaten the vileſt vaſſall in his Court, with all the tortures that tyranny can inflict, and let him try if he can for his heart put his pooreſt ſubject into that fright and feare that now his conſcience puts him into, in the ruffe, and middſt of his jollity. But I pray what ayles he to be in this feare, in this ſo extraordinary a feare? Hee can neither reade, nor underſtand the writing upon the wall. Indeed it threatned him the loſſe of his kingdome, but hee cannot reade his threatning, hee knowes not whether they be bitter things that God writes againſt him, why may he not hope that it may bee good which is written, and why may not this hope eaſe, and abate his feare? No, no. Though he cannot reade nor underſtand the writing, yet his guilty conſcience can comment ſhrewdly upon it, and can tell him it portends no good towards him. His conſcience now tells him of his godleſſe impieties, in profaning the veſſels of the Temple of the true God, and that for this his ſacrilegious impropriation, and abuſe of holy things, God is now come to reckon with him. Thus can his conſcience doe more than all his wiſe men. All the wiſe men came in, but they could not reade the writing, nor make knowne to the King the interpretation thereof. Dan. 5. 8. But his conſcience is wiſer than all his wiſe men, and when they are as puzzeld, that interprets to him, that this writing meanes him no good, and though he cannot reade the ſyllables, yet his conſcience gives a ſhrewd neere gueſſe at the ſubſtance of the writing; and therefore hence comes that extaſie of feare, and thoſe paroxyſmes of horror.
It was better with Adam after his fall. After his Sin committed, we find him in a great feare, Gen. 3. 8, 10. and hee hides himſelfe for feare. Now obſerve how his feare is deſcribed from the circumſtance of the time. They heard the voyce of the Lord God, walking in the garden in the coole of the day. Luther layes the Emphaſis of the aggravation of his feare, upon this word, the wind or coole of the day. The night indeeed is naturally terrible; and darkneſſe is fearfull, whence that phraſe, Pſ. 91. The terrors of the night. But the day and the light, is a cheerfull and a comfortable creature, Ec. 11. 7. Truly the light is ſweet, and a pleaſant thing it is for the eyes to behold the Sun. How is it then that in the faire day light, which gives courage and comfort, that Adam feares, and runs into the thickets? Oh, his conſcience was become Gravis malae conſcientiae, luxeſt. Senec. ep. 123.come evill, and full of darkneſſe, and the darkneſſe of his conſcience turned the very light into darkneſſe, and ſo turned the comforts of the day into the terrours of the night. So that in this ſenſe it may be ſaid of an evill conſcience, which of the Lord is ſaid in another, Pſ. 139. 12. VntoUnto it the darkneſſe, and the light are both alike. As full of feare in the light as in the dark. And beſides, the Lord came but in a gentle wind, the coole breath of the day, now what a ſmall matter is a coole wind, and that in the day time to, to put a man in a feare? Such ſmall things breed great feares in evill conſciences. In what a wofull plight would Adam (thinke we) have beene, if the Lord had come to him, at the dead, and darke midde-night with earth-quakes, thunder, and bluſtring tempeſt?
We may ſee the like in Cain. After he had defiled his conſcience with his brothers blood, in what feares, yea, what idle feares lived hee? Hee is ſo haunted with feares, that though he had lived in Paradice, yet had he lived in a land of Nod, in a land of agitation, yea, of trepidation. Iudge what caſe his evill conſcience made him in, by that ſpeech, Gen. 4. 14. It ſhall come to paſſe, that every one that finds me ſhall ſlay me. Surely there could not bee many yet in the world, and thoſe that were in the world, were either his parents, brethren, ſiſters, or neere kindred, his feare ſeemes to imagine multitudes of people that might meete him, yea, and that every one hee meets would murther him. What, will his Father or Mother be his executioners? What if any of his ſiſters meet him, ſhal they ſlay him? is not ſuch a ſwaſh-buckler as he, able to make good his party with them? Lo what fearfull, and terrible things a guilty conſcience projects.
As an evill conſcience is miſerable in its feares, ſo in thoſe perplexities which this feare breeds. Theſe perplexities doe miſerably and reſtleſſely diſtract a man. Iſay. 57. 20. The wicked are like the troubled Sea, when it cannot reſt, whoſe waters caſt up mire and dirt. What is the reaſon of theſe trouble ſome perplexities? The want of peace of a good conſcience, verſe 21. There is no peace, ſaith my God, to the wicked. The winds make the ſea reſtleſſe, and ſtirre it to the very bottome, ſo as the waters caſt up mire and dirt. See in the troubled Sea, the Emblem of a troubled conſcience.
But the Torment exceeds all, and the maine miſery of an evill conſcience lies in that. It is a miſery to be in feare, a miſery to have inward turbulencie, and commotions, but to be alwayes on the racke, alwayes on the Strapado, this is far more truly the ſuburbs of Hell, than is the Popiſh purgatory. Oh! the gripes, and girds, the ſtitches, and twitches, the throwes, and pangs of a galling, and a guilty conſcience. So ſore they are, and ſo unſufferable, that Iudas ſeeks eaſe with an halter, Poena autem vehemens, & multo ſaevior illis. Quas & Ceditius gravis inven… & Radamanthus. Nocte dieque ſuum geſtare in pectore teſtem. Iuvenal. Satyr. 3.and thinks hanging eaſe in compariſon of the torture of his evill conſcience. All the racks, wheeles, wild horſes, hot pincers, ſcalding leade powred into the moſt tender, and ſenſible parts of the body, yea, all the mercileſſe, barbarous, and inhumane cruelties of the holy houſe, are but flea-bitings, meere toyes, and May-games, compared with the torment that an evill conſcience wil put a man to, when it is awakened. It is no wonder that Iudas hangs himſelfe, it had been a great wonder rather if hee had not hangd himſelfe.
The Heathen fabled terrible things of their helliſh furies, with their ſnakes and Nolite enim putare quē admodum in fabulis ſaepenumero videtis, eos qui aliquid impie ſcelerateque cō miſerint agitari & perter…ori furiarum taedis ardentibus. Sua quemque fraus, & ſuus terror maximevexat, ſuum quē que ſcelus agitat amentiaque afficit. Suae malae cogitationes, conſcientiaeque animi terrent. Hae ſunt impiis aſſiduae, domeſticae que furiae, quae dies nocteſque parentum poenas à conſceleratiſſimis filiis repetant Cicero pro Roſc. Amor. Suum quemque facinus, ſuum ſcclus, ſua audacia de ſanitate, ac mente deturbat Haec ſunt impiorum furiae, flammae, hae faces. Idem. L. Piſon.fiery torches, vexing and tormenting hainous, and great offenders. Theſe their furies were nothing elſe, but the helliſh torments of guilty conſcience, wherewith wicked perſons were continually haunted, as ſome of the wiſer of themſelves have well obſerved. All ſnakes and torches are but idle toyes, and meere trifles, to the moſt exquiſite torment of a guilty and accuſing conſcience.
The ſting of conſcience is worſe than death it ſelfe, Apoc. 9. 5, 6. Their torment was as the torment of a Scorpion when hee ſtrikes a man; And in thoſe dayes ſhall men ſeeke death, and ſhall not find it, and ſhall deſire to dye, and death ſhall flee from them. Popiſh ones tormented in their conſciences by the terrible and uncomfortable doctrines of ſatisfactions, Purgatory fire, &c. which thoſe Locuſts doe ſo terrifie them withall, ſhould rather chuſe death, than live in ſuch an uncomfortable condition: The ſting of death not ſo ſmart, as the ſting of a Scorpion in the conſcience. The ſting of an accuſing conſcience, is like an Harlot, Pro. 7. 26. More bitter than death. And as Salomon there ſpeaks of the Harlot, ſo may it be ſaid of a tormenting conſcience, Who ſo pleaſes God ſhall eſcape from it, but the ſinner ſhall be taken by it.
Gods deare children themſelves, many of them are not freed from trouble in their conſciences, but they have their hels in this life, Ion. …. 2. Out of the belly of hell I cryed unto thee. God for their triall ſpeaks bitter things unto them, and not only denies them peace, but cauſes their conſciences to be at war with them. Now when God puts his owne children to theſe trials, and diſquiets of conſcience, they are ſo bitter, and ſo biting, that had they not the grace of God to uphold and preſerve them, even they could not be ſaved from dangerous miſcarriage. Iob was put to this triall, and his conſcience apprehended Gods anger, and we ſhall ſee what a caſe he was in, Iob 6. 8, 9. O that I might have my requeſt, and that God would grant me the thing I long for, even that it would pleaſe God to deſtroy me, that hee would let looſe his hands, and cut me off. Nay, worſe, Iob 14. 15. Thou ſcareſt me with dreames, & terrifieſt me through viſions, ſo that my ſoul chooſes flrangling, and death rather than life. Gods grace preſerves his Saints from ſelfe-murther, but yet not alwayes from impatient wiſhes; Iob wiſhes ſtrangling and chuſes it of the two, but goes no further. What wonder then that Iudas doth ſtrangle himſelfe, when his conſcience ſtares him in the face, when as Iob, with whom God is but in jeſt in compariſon, chuſes ſtrangling. If Iob wiſh it, what wonder that Iudas doth the deed. Conſcience doth chaſtiſe the godly but wth whips, but it laſhes the wicked with ſcorpions. Now if the whips be ſo ſmarting to Iob, as makes him chuſe ſtrangling, what wonder that the ſcorpions be ſo cutting, as makes Iudas ſeek reliefe at an halter.
Yea, and that which addes to the miſery of an evill conſcience, being awakned, it is ſuch a miſery as no earthly comfort can aſſwage or mitigate. Diſeaſes and diſtempers of the body though they bee terrible, yet Phyſick, ſleep, and reſt upon a mans bed, yields him ſome eaſe, and ſome comfort. Sometime in ſome griefes the cōfortable uſe of the creatures, yields a man ſome refreſhments, Prov. 31. 6, 7. Give wine unto thoſe that be of heauy hearts, let him drinke, and forget his poverty, and remember his miſery no more. But conſcience being diſquieted, finds no eaſe in theſe. Darius againſt his conſcience ſuffers innocent Daniel to be caſt into the Lyons den. What cheere hath hee that night? He paſſed the night in faſting, Dan. 6. 18. Not in faſting, in humiliation for his Sin, but conſcience now began to gall him, and hee having marred the feaſt of his conſcience, conſcience alſo marres his feaſting, none of his dainties will now downe, his wine is turned into gall and wormewood, no joy now in any thing. He had marred the muſick of his conſcience, and now he brookes not other muſicke. The Inſtruments of muſicke were not brought before him. His guilty conſcience was now awakened, and now he cannot ſleepe; His ſleepe went from him. So Iob in his conflict for conſcience hoped for eaſe in his bed, Iob 7. 13. My bed ſhall comfort me, my couch ſhall eaſe my complaint. But how was it with him? Either he could not ſleep at all, ver. 3. 4. Weariſome nights are appointed unto me. When I lye downe, I ſay, when ſhal I ariſe, and the night be gone? and I am full of toſsing to and fro unto the dawning of the day. Needs muſt he toſſe, whoſe conſcience is like the Sea waves toſſed with the winds, or elſe if Iob did ſleepe, yet did not conſcience ſleepe, ver. 14. but even in his ſleepe preſented him with ghaſtly ſights and viſions, When I ſay my bed ſhall comfort me, then thou ſcareſt me with dreames, and terrifiest mee through viſions.
At other times when conſcience hath beene good, Gods people though their dangers have beene great, yet neither the greatneſſe, nor neerneſſe of their dangers have broken their ſleepe, Pſ. 3. 5. 7. I laid me downe and ſlept, I will not be afraid of ten thouſands of people that have ſet themſelves againſt mee round about. And yet if wee looke to the title of the Pſalme, A Pſalm of David when he fled from Abſolom his Son; one would thinke David ſhould have had little liſt, or leaſure to have ſlept. Peter thought to have been executed the next morrow by Herod, & though hee alſo lodged betweene a company of ruffianly ſoldiers, that happily one would feare might have done him ſome miſchiefe in his ſleep, yet how ſoundly ſleeps he that night, Act. 12. And holy Bradford was found a ſleepe, when they came to fetch him to be burnt at the ſtake. Theſe feares brake not theſe mens ſleepe. How might this come to paſſe? They did as Pſ. 4. 8. I will lay me downe in peace and ſleep. He that can lie downe in the peace of conſcience, may ſleepe ſoundly, whatſoever cauſes of feare there be otherwiſe. But contrarily, he that cannot ly downe with the peace of conſcience, will find but little reſt and ſleepe, though his heart bee free from all other feares. Evill conſcience being awakened, will fill the heart with ſuch feares, as a man ſhall have little liberty to ſleep. Oh the ſweet ſleep that Iacob had, and the ſweet dreame, when he lay upon the cold earth, and had an hard ſtone under his head for his pillow. An hard lodging, and an hard pillow, but yet ſweet reſt, and ſweet communion with God. A good conſcience makes any lodging ſoft and eaſie; but downe-beds, and down-pillowes, if there be thornes in the conſcience, are but beds of thornes, and beds of nettles. The bitterneſſe of an evill conſcience diſtaſtes all the ſweets of this life, as when the mouth and tongue is furred in an hot Ague, all meates and drinks are bitter to the ſicke party. This is the miſery of an evil conſcience awakened in this life.
2. But it may be many never feele this miſery here, there is therefore the more miſery reſerved for them in hell, in the world to come. Indeed more by many thouſands go to hell like Nabal, than like Iudas; more die like ſots in Security, than in deſpaire of conſcience. Death it ſelfe cannot awaken ſome conſciences, but no ſooner come they into hel, but conſcience is there awakened to the full, never to ſleep more; and then ſhe laſhes and gaſhes to the quick, and lets men learne that forbearance was no payment. Tel many men of conſcience, and they are ready to ſlap one on the mouth with that profane proverbe, Tuſh, conſcience was hanged many yeares agoe. But the time will come, that they who have lived in evill conſcience, ſhall find the conſcience which they have counted hanged, ſhall play the cruell hangman, and tormentor with them. They ſhall find conſcience unhanged, when it ſhall hang them up in hell, when day and night it ſhall ſtretch them there upon the racke.
The torments which an evill conſcience puts the damned to in hell, are beyond the expreſſion of the tongue, and the comprehenſion of mans conceit. There be two ſpeciall things in the torments of Hell, wee have them both thrice repeated together, Mark. 9. 44, 46, 48. Where their worme dies not, and the fire is not quenched. There is an ever-living worme, and never-dying fire. And marke that in all the three verſes the worme is ſet in the firſt place, as it were to teach us, that the prime and principal torment in hell is the worme, rather than the fire. And what is the worme, but the guilt of an evill conſcience, that ſhall lye eternally gnawing and graſping, twitching, and griping, the heart of the damned in hell? Men talke much of hell fire, and it were well they would talke more of it; but yet there is another torment forgotten, that would be thought on too. There is an Hell worm, as well as there is an Hell fire. And it may be a queſtion whether of the two is the greateſt torment. And yet no great queſtion neither. For as the Heaven of Heauen, is the peace and joy of a good, ſo the very Hell of Hell, is the guilt and and worme of an evill conſcience. A man may ſafely ſay, it is better being in hell with a good conſcience, than to be in heaven, if that might be, with an evill one. Heaven without a good conſcience, what is it better than hel? Paradice was an heaven on earth, but when Adam had loſt the Paradice of a good conſcience, what joy did paradice, & the pleaſures of the gardē afford him more, than if he had beene in ſome ſad and ſolitary Deſert? A good conſcience makes a Deſert a Paradice, an evill one turnes a Paradice into a Deſert. A good conſcience makes Hell to be no Hell, and an evil one makes Heaven to be no Heaven. Both the happines, and miſery of Heaven and Hell, are from the inward frame of the conſcience. The Hell of Hell, is the worm of Hell, and that worm is the worm of an evill conſcience, which if it be not wormed out, and ſo the conſcience in this life made good, it will be an immortall worme in Hell.
The helliſh deſpaire wherewith the damned are overwhelmed, comes rather from this worm, than from the fire. Whoſe worm dies not, and whoſe fire is not quenched. The fire of Hell never quenches, becauſe the worme of Hell never dies. If the worme of Hell would die, the fire of Hell would go out. For if there were no guilt, there ſhould be no puniſhment. So that the very Hell of Hell, is that ſelf-torment which an evill conſcience breeds.
Now then all this conſidered, how powerfully ſhould it move us to labour for a good conſcience. Thou that goeſt on in thine evill courſes, and hateſt to be reformed and reclamed, do but bethinke thy ſelfe, if God ſhould awaken thy conſcience, in what miſery thou ſhouldſt live Vt ex cruditate febres naſcuntur, & vermes quā do quis cibum ſumit intemperanter, ita ſi quis peccata peccatis accumulet, nec deco quot ea poenetentia, ſed miſceat peccata peccatis, cruditatem contrahit veterum & recentium delictorum igne adu…etur proprio, & vermibus conſumetur. Ignis eſt quē generat moeſtitia delictorum, vermis eſt eo quod irrationabilia animi peccata, mentem pungunt, & viſcera exedant, vermes ex unoque naſcuntur tanquam ex corpore peccatoris, hic vermis non morietur, &c. Ambr. lib. 7. in Luk. c. 14.here, what an hell to have a palſie conſcience? what a hell on earth to be alwayes under the accuſations, inditements, and terrors of conſcience, and to live Cain. like in the land of Nod, in a continuall reſtleſſe agitation.
But eſpecially as thou feareſt that everliving and ever grabbing worme, ſo have a care to get a good conſcience. Greene & raw fruits breed Cheſtworms, which if heed be not taken, will eate the very maw thorow. A dead body and a putrified corrupt carcaſſe, breeds worms that ly gnawing at it in the grave. The forbidden and raw fruits of Sin, are thoſe which breed Cheſtwormes in the conſcience. The corruptions of the ſoule, and dead workes are thoſe that breed this living worme, take heed therfore of medling with theſe fruits that will breed this worme, and get thy conſcience purged from dead works, get this worme killed with the ſooneſt, for if thou letteſt it live till thou dye, it will never die at all, and will put thee to thoſe exquiſite torments, from which to be freed, thou wouldſt willingly ſuffer ten thouſand of the moſt cruell deaths that the wit of man were able to invent.
As then I ſay thou feareſt this worme of Hell, ſo get a good conſcience. Drink downe every morning a hearty draught of Chriſts blood, which may make this worme burſt. And when once this worm is burſt and voyded, and the conſcience well purged by Chriſts blood, take heed ever after of eating thoſe raw fruits that will breed new wormes. Lead ſo holy, ſo upright, and ſo conſcionable a life, that thou mayeſt not by thy freſh Sins clog thy conſcience with freſh guilt. Get thy conſcience purged by Chriſts blood, and thy converſation framed by Gods Word. Thy words were found by me, and I did eate them, Ier. 15. 16. Do thou ſo, eat no more the unwholeſome and worme-breeding fruits of Sin; but drinke Chriſts blood, and eate Gods Word, and they both ſhall purifie and ſcoure thy conſcience from all ſuch ſtuffe, as may breed and feed the Hell-worme of an evill conſcience.