The Mystery of Self-Deceiving, Chapter 14
CHAP. XIIII.
Of two other deceitfull excuses of sinne, and the vse of the whole.
THe fifth deceitfull excuse is that of Custome. 5. Custome.O say some, when they are rebuked for their swearing, idle, and vaine formes of speech, and such like sinnes, Truely wee meant no hurt, it is onelyonly a custome we hauehave got, and cannot now easily leaue. What wretched madnesse is this, that, because we are come to the very height of sinne, (for what else is custome in sinne?) wee should therefore think our selues priuiledged to sinne; that custome in sinne then which nothing increaseth sinne more, should be vsed as an extenuation thereof? The Apostle Peter, when hee would disswade vsus from the mispending of our time in sin, and vanity, thought he could vse no better argument then this, that heeretofore it hath beene our custome of a long time so to doe. Hence forward (saith hee) liue (as much time as remaineth in the flesh) not after the lusts of men, but after the 1. Pet. 4. 2. 3.will of God. Why? for it is sufficient for vsus, that wee hauehave spent the time past of the life after the lusts of the Gentiles, walking in wantonnesse, &c. Lo how he aggrauates their former sinnes, and so perswades them to desist, because they had so long accustomed themselues thereto. Doest thou then make a but of thy custome? Oh sir it is but a custome. Why what canst thou say more against thy selfe? If thou hadst sworne but once in all thy life, it had bin a sinne heauy enough to crush thee downe into hell: but now when thou tellest me it is thy daily custome; that thy tongue is traded in this wickednesse, how now? hast not thou mended the matter fairly? for shame then away with this so witlesse, gracelesse, and shamelesse an excuse. Would a thiefe or murtherer, being arraigned at the barre, be so simple as to alleage in their defence, that it hath beene their vse & custome of a long time to play such reakes: Would not foreign hom. 19. ad popul Antioch. hom. 14. ad pop. Anti. foreign. hom. 7. ad pop. Ant. foreign.the iudge, so much the sooner, send them to the gallowes? If the plea of custome be so weake for the defence of these sins before man, why then, as Chrysostome reasons, should it not be as insufficient for the maintenance of swearing before Gods tribunall. Though it had beene the Antiochians custome to wash them in the baths, yet, the king forbidding them, they all left for feare of his displeasure. Wherupon Chrysostome conuinced them of deceifulnes in the vse of this excuse, in pleading the tyrannie of custome. Lo, saith hee, you may see that where feare is, there our wonted custome is left presently: feare easilie ouermasters custome, though it bee neuer so auncient and necessary. It is not then our custome, but our want of Gods feare, which is the cause of our swearing. The same Father in another place, maketh mention of one, who had got an ilfauoured fashion of mouing his right shoulder, when he went, which yet hee corrected, by laying a sword ouer it, in such manner, that it should be in danger of cutting, if so it moued. And so, by feare of incision, hee taught his shoulders better manners and motions. Do thou, who pretendest the custome of thy tongue in swearing the same to thy tongue, that he to his shoulder, and in stead of his sword vse the sworde of Gods worde, and Gods iudgments threatned against this sinne, and thou shalt easily get ridde of this thy euill custome. For, let men say what they will, it is nothing but their owne hard hearts, voide of all feare of God and his iudgements, together with their sloth and negligence, in not striuing against their euill customes, that makes them such slaues vntounto them.
The last refuge is to helpe out the matter with some distinctions, and pretences of false ends, or any 6. Subtill distinctions.such like quirkes. This is the tale-bearers iustification of himselfe, I do it not to discredit him, but onelyonly in louelove and good-wil. So the wearer of long haire, I doe it not for pride, but onelyonly to hide the deformitie of my eares, or to keepe my head warme. So the good companions, as they call them, that conuerse familiarly with notorious wicked persons, we doe it only for honest refreshment, and to winne them by kindnesse, as Christ conuersed with the Publicanes, & sinners. So those Corinthians, that were present at the idols feasts; We doe it not in honour of the idol, but only to gratifie our friends, in a thing indifferent, the eating of meats. Thus the Papists for their adoration of the creatures, say, they performe onelyonly seruice, but not worship, which is due to God onelyonly. The man of vindictiue spirit, can distinguish betwixt forgiuing and forgetting, and tell you hee hath forgiuen his enemy, though he hauehave not forgotten the wrong hee hath done him. Bradford in one of his Epistles makes mention of one that excused subscription to the Popish articles being qualified with this limitation, so farre forth as they were not against the worde of God, beeing indeede all quite contrary thereto. And in this manner he moued Bradford & others to subscribe. But a notable example for this deceit was that of the Israelites in their oath against the giuing of their daughters in marriage to the Beniamites. For when the women of Iabesh Gilead did not suffice the Beniamites, and their oath hindred them Iude 21.from giuing any of their owne daughters, they bad them take by force of their owne virgins that should come forth to daunce in Shiloh. Why but was not this gainst their oath? yes, but mark what a fine quirk they found out to elude their oath, and so to qualifie the matter, namely that they did not giuegive them their daughters, but the Beniamites tooke them away. Not much vnlike are those shifts to cousen the good lawes and oaths, against buying of places with monie, as the laying of wagers before hand with those of whom they are to bee had, That wee shall not hauehave such, or such a place. Such also was the deceit of those who hauing made truce with their aduersaries for certaine daies, did yet during the truce make incursion vponupon them in the night, & then defended it, because their truce was onelyonly for daies, not nights. To this head also wee may refer that excuse of our trauailers, who excuse their kissing of the Popes toe, because they doe that honour to him onelyonly as a temporall prince, and not as Pope. But these men are not so happy in their inuentions, to saue their conscience, as was once one to saue his honour; who grudging the Persian king that honour of falling downe before him, and yet not knowing how to auoide it, purposely let fall his ring when he came into the Kings presence, and so excused the matter to himselfe, as though he fell downe only to take vp his ring, and not to worship the king. And diuers such like cranckes as these might bee instanced in. The which indeede are but curteins, we draw before our owne eies, to hide our sin; they are indeed, as the spiders webbe, cunningly wouen, and some slight of witt may there appeare in them, but withall they are as slight as the spiders webbe, they will not indure the breath, and blast of the mouth of God. Doe not then wilfully deceiue thy selfe. But thinke with thy selfe, will these distinctions, praetences & qualifications satisfie my conscience hereafter in the day of trial? And thus much for the harts excusing of our euill actions, as also for the iudgement of our hearts concerning our actions.
The vse of all this is, Vse.
1. To teach vsus not to be ouer forward in consulting with flesh and bloud, when any thing is to bee done. Who would vse a crooked rule in drawing of lines? Who would go to such a lawyer, whose counsells he knew to be meere deceit and cousonage? If then our hearts vnasked doe offer vsus their counsell, let vsus suspect it: let vsus be as iealous ouer our hearts as we would be ouer a knowne crafty deceiuer.
2. Not to rest secure in the iudgement of our owne hearts. Many blesse themselues in their euill courses, because their seared and senselesse consciences, their deceiued and deceiuing hearts doe not checke them. The trecherous selling of Ioseph was swallowed downe by his brethren, and did not trouble them for nigh twenty yeares afterward. The reason was, the mists of corrupt affections dazeled the eies of their minde, and so they could not beholde their sinne in the right forme, but when affliction had remooued these mists of deceit from their eies, then they beheld it, in the right shape, most ouglie, and monstrous, and were confounded with the horrour thereof. Had they any reason to approue their fact all that while, and to applaud themselues in it, because of this deceitfull peace of a deceitful heart. O saies one, I thanke God I finde quiet and peace in mine owne heart, whatsoeuer such, and such iudge of me for my courses. But what talkst thou of peace? or what hast thou to doe with peace (as Iehu said to Iehoram) who hast no other ground to build it vponupon, then the deceitfull iudgement of thine owne blinde and bewitched heart? Thou lookest in troubled water, and seest no deformity in thy face. But stay till the water be setled and cleered, and then thou shalt see what a filthy mishapen visage thou hast. Tell me tenne yeere hence, or in the day of thy triall, when thy heart shall be freed from these deceits, & Christ with the clay and spittle of some sharpe affliction shall hauehave sharpened thy dull eye-sight, tel me then what peace thou hast?
3. Since our hearts as we hauehave shewed are so deceitfull in excusing and defending of our sinnes, it must teach vsus to labour for the spirit of ingenuity, for that open, and plaine heart of Iob in confessing of our sinnes, that with him we may be able to say, If Iob. 31, 33.we hauehave hid our sinne as did Adam, &c. Though our hearts deceiued vsus at first, to make vsus sinne, yet let vsus not suffer them to deceiue vsus further, to make vsus to defend our sinne. This is to adde deceit to deceit. In Psal. 139. Mereberis illuminari. Et quomodo … uades è duplicibus tenebris qui in simplicibus lab…rabas. In Psalm. 50. Commissum est, non defendatur, in cōfessionem veniat non defensionem. Ad hibes te defensorē peccati tui? vinceris. Quis es. n. vt te defendas? Idoneus esto, ad accusandū te▪ noli dicere, ant nihil feci, aut quid magnū feci? aut fecerunt et alij. Si faciendo peccatū nihil te ditis del…q…iss, ni…il eris, nihil accipi…s. Paratus est deus dare indulg…ntiā, claudis contra te: Ille paratus est d…re noli opp…nere obic…n… defensi… nis, sed aperi sinum cōfessionis.This is double deceitfulnesse, when single was too much. Excellently Austin, If thou hast sinned thou art in darkenesse, but by confessing thy darkenesse, thou shalt obtain the illuminatiō of thy darknes: but by defending thy darkenes thou shalt be darkned in thy darknes. And how wilt thou escape out of double darknes who had so much to doe with single? And again, Thou hast committed a sinne. Let it be confessed, not defended. If thou wilt take vponupon thee the defence of thy sinne, thou wilt easily be ouercome, &c. For who art thou to defend thy selfe? Bee thou ready to accuse thy selfe. Say not, either I hauehave done nothing, or no such great matter, or no more then others. If hauing sinned, thou saist thou hast done nothing, thou shalt be nothing, thou shalt receiue nothing. God is ready to giuegive the pardon. Thou stoppest it against thy selfe. He Isay is ready to giuegive it. Doe not thou lay the blocke of thine owne defence, and iustification against it: but open the bosome of thy confession, and selfe condemnation for it.