The Mystery of Self-Deceiving, Chapter 10
CHAP. X.
The vse of the first head of the hearts deceitfulnesse, or an earnest exhortation to trie our selues whether we hauehave ouertaken the temporary.
HEtherto of the deceitfulnesse of heart in iudging of our persons: It remaineth to speake of the deceitfulnesse in iudging of our actions: but first wee must consider what vse wee are to make of the former.
The speciall vse is that of the Apostle, Trie your selues, examine your selues, whether ye are in the faith 2. Cor. 13, 5.or no: our harts would make vsus beleeue we were thus and thus: But the Scripture hath discouered our hearts vntounto vsus for noble impostors and deceiuers. Now who is there, that would easily beleeue a knowne deceiuer? Nay as it fareth with such that often deceiue by speaking falsly, that they cannot bee credited of vsus when they speake truely: the like suspition and ielousie should we hauehave these false hearts in, euen then when they giuegive in right iudgement. I know nothing by my selfe saith Paul, mine owne heart 1. Cor, 4, 4.doth not condemne me, and yet I dare not be ouerbloud in bearing out my selfe vponupon this iudgement, this sentence of mine owne hart will not iustifie me. Much deceit may be hidden therein: God, that is farre greater then our harts, sees that in them which they see not themselues: good reason hast thou then my brother, to mistrust the iudgement of thine own heart, concerning thy selfe, and those so peremptorie sentences, which it causeth thy mouth to vtter, that if there were but one man to be saued, thou art the man. Oh how many sleepers are there, that dreame this dreame of a strong assurance of their saluation, that both liue and dye in this dreame, and so go downe merily to hell? where their paines shall be greater, by how much their expectation of them through the deceitfulnesse of their hearts, was the lesse. Is it not paine enough to be in hell, but thou must needs increase the paine by this wicked, and wilful selfe-deceiuing? HaueHave we then our eares in our heads, and marke wee well the voyce of these our hearts, when they suggest secretly vntounto vsus, Thou art in good case, the child of God, the beloued of God. Consider we whether our owne hearts may not flatter vsus, whether the deuill may not delude vsus. Rest we not in our owne hearts voice, neither accept we the deceitfull applause thereof; but as once Ioshuah, seeing the Angell, examined him, Art thou on our side, Iosh, 5, 13.or on our aduersaries, so do we, hearing these words, try them whence they are: for the eare saith Elihu, Iob. 34, 3.trieth words, as the outward words of other mens mouthes, so the inward words of our own harts. Say then to these words, to this secret crie, whence art thou, commest thou from gods spirit, or from Sathan? As wee must try the spirits, in the outward 1. Iohn, 4, 1.wordes deliuered by men, so also in the secret thoughts of our hart, specially these concerning our owne estate to Godward, whether they bee the voice of Gods spirit, or of the euill spirit of error and illusion. It was vile for those clawing flatteres to say vntounto a man, The voyce of God: much more for vsus to say so to the Diuell himselfe. And what do we else, Acts 12, 22.when wee apprehend and applaud his mocking illusions, and lying suggestions, as the oracle of God, and goe away with them, as if God, from heauen, had told vsus we were his. Try we then these sounds, before we trust them, & carefully examine the grounds which thy heart can show to make good her so confident assurance. Heere especially remember those fearefull deceits of the Temporarie; how like a true beleeuer he is, and yet none; how neere hee comes to heauen doore, and yet enters not, how far he trauels in the way to Canaan, euen with those Israelites to Kadeshbarnea within eleuen daies iourney of the land, and yet neuer sees it, neuer enioyes it, but is as farre off, as if he had sitten still in Aegypt, and neuer stirred foote out of doore. Consider seriously with thy selfe how farre Pharaoh, Saul, Iehu, Iudas, Ahab and others hauehave gone in humiliation, sorrow, desire, zeale, reformation, and yet for all this hauehave gone to their owne place. Deale now vnpartiallie with thy selfe, and tell mee whether thou doest not come short of many of these, who yet neuer hadst the heart, vponupon the threatning of the word, to relent and humble thy selfe with Ahab, to confesse thy sins and desire the praiers of Gods children, with Pharaoh, to be affected with ioy in hearing the word, and practise many things with Herod, to bee zealous against sinne with Iehu, to lose some part of thy goods with Ananias, to forsake the world, and all thy hopes there, and to follow poore Christ with Iudas, Demas & others, much lesse to venter thy life with Alexander the copper-smith, in cleauing to the truth? may such as these be wicked reprobates, & yet wilt thou please thy selfe in a false conceit of thine owne happines, who commest far further behind thē then they do behind true Christians? For vntounto one of this rank, our Sauior saith, Thou art not far from the kingdom of heauen; but vntounto thee it cannot be said, that thou art not far from Iehu, Iudas, Saul, Nicolas, Alexander & other such like temporaries: for they, some of them specially, had many notable graces, so that Nicolas was chosen Deacon by the Church, for that reuerend respect they had of his gifts, Iudas was an Apostle, and could both pray and preach with great zeale; generally the common sort of them may bee inwardly affected in praier, conference, hearing the worde, feele many good motions, tast of the powers of the life to come, feele some rellish in the promises, tremble at the threatnings, reforme all outward corruptions of life, as we hauehave already shewed. And thou that makest thy selfe so sure of heauen art happely a despiser of the worde and praier, a senselesse blocke, that neuer feelest the least glimpse of any spirituall motion, a muddy worldling, that canst not raise vp thy spirit out of the mucke of the earth, into the heauens, to conceiue any one pure or refined thought. Why then hast thou not the wit thus to thinke with thy selfe? What? those that are Saints and Angels in regard of mee, are they yet deceiued in iudging themselues to be in state of saluation? how grosse then is my errour, in being thus conceited of my selfe? If some that hauehave iournied in the wildernesse to Kadeshbarnea, shall yet neuer enter into Gods rest, shall those, that neuer left Egypt? Is the stonie ground reprobate ground? and can the high waie ground be good?
As long then as thou art cast behind the temporarie, thou art miserably deceiued, if thou thinkest well of thy selfe. So also art thou, though thou hast attained vntounto him, vnlesse withal thou outstrip him, attaining to that which no Temporarie, as long as a Temporarie, either is or can be. O thou wilt say whats that? Ans. I hauehave already shewed it in the detection of the particular deceits of the temporarie, yet thus much may be added. The chiefe difference Wherein the true Christian goes beyond the vnsound. Luk, 8, 15.our Sauiour, in the parable, maketh betwixt the best of the other grounds, and the good, is this; that those onelyonly signified by the good ground, had good and honest hearts: for the stonie and thornie hearers brought forth fruit, but they wanted this same good and honest heart, and in steed thereof, had either a stony, or thornie: see then what it is wherein the true Christian excelleth the Temporary, namely, the good and the honest heart. The honesty of the heart is to bee referred to the intents it hath in the doing of particular actions: so that is an honest heart which aimes at the right in that she doth. The goodnes of the heart is to bee referred to the inward renewed good qualities. So that a good hart is a hart which by regeneration is changed; clensed and purged of the former naughtinesse, and so indued with another kind of nature, and disposition, whereby it hateth all sinne, and loueth, sauoureth, and affecteth things spiritual. Heere then is that we must narrowly examine our selues by, if we will not be deceiued by our owne harts, in iudging our selues to be Gods children, when we are not. If any man saith Paul, bee in Christ he must become a new creature. He must hauehave 2. Cor. 5. 17.that same cleane heart of the Prophet created in him, Psal. 51. 10. Eph, 4. 23.and that same right spirit renewed in him. Hee must be renewed in the very spirit of his mind, in the most inward and subtle parts of the soule, as it were the quintessence of it. And this happely may also be the meaning of the Apostle, praying for the Thessalonians, that they might bee sanctified throughout in their soules, bodies and spirits: by spirit vnderstanding the 1. Thes. 5. 23. opened.same thing that in the other place to the Romanes, the best and choysest of both the parts, both soule, and body. Heere is the maine defect of the Temporarie. Though hee may seeme to bee renewed in his mind, yet not in the spirit of his mind: to be sanctified in soule & body, yet not in the spirit and quintessence of both. Hee reserues that for some sinne or other, which is closely harboured, & nourished there. Like as the thornes hauehave as it were the best spirits of the ground, and doe drinke vp the very creame, & flower therof, so that the fruit comes to nothing, being robbed of it nourishment by the thornes. Not but that there may be and are many secret corruptions in the trulie regenerate: for euen the good ground may hauehave thornes: but yet these corruptions incroch not vponupon the spirit of the soule; thats reserued for the grace and spirit of God; these thornes get not the fat of the soile; the good come feedes on that; the thornes doe not grow vp together with, & so ascend Luc. 8, 7. foreign.and climbe vp aboue, and ouertop the good fruite; nay the good man plaies the good husband, and is euer and anon cutting vp those thornes, thereafter as hee feeles them. Therefore it is saide excellently of the good ground, that it bringeth forth fruit encreasing and ascending; which seemes to be spoken in opposition Mark 48. foreign.to the thornie ground, of which it was saide, that the thornes grew vp and ascended, namely aboue the corne. But in the good ground, though there may be thornes, yet the corne ascends aboue the thornes, grace is superiour to corruption, and keepes it vnderunder.
Let vsus not then deceiue our selues with the temporarie for that we hauehave some feelings, some motions, some good affections of ioy, feare, sorrow, or such like, if there be but any one thorne, either of couetousnesse, as in Iudas, Demas, Simon Magus, or of vaineglory and ambition, as in Iehu, Agrippa, or of any other naughty affection, it is enough to choake all grace, and sterue all goodnesse; so that, as our Sauiour speaketh, we must needs become vnfruitfull. The Diuell can bee content to let vsus pray, preach, heare and doe all these things with some feeling and affection, and hereupon to iudge our selues to bee true Christians, as long as his interest in our hearts continues, as long as he may hauehave sure hold of vsus, by any one reigning sinne. For right wel doth he know, whatsoeuer good we conceiue of our selues, we doe but deceiue our selues, we are still as it is saide of Simon Magus, in the gall of bitternesse, and in the bond of Acts 8.iniquity. It stands vsus in hand therefore throughly to gage these deepe hearts, euen to the bottome, and to crye with Dauid, trye me O Lord; prooue mee, whether there be any way of wickednes in me. If there bee a Psalm. 139, 23thorne in thy foote, thou canst goe but haltingly, if any inordinate lust or desire bee ingrafted into thy affections, though with Agrippa thou maist be much mooued with the preaching of the word, yet with him thou art but an halfe and an halting Christian. Doth the louelove of worldly honour, pompe, praise and profit preuaile in thee, then know (thou spirituall adulterer, or adulteresse) that the louelove of the world is Iames 4. 4.enmity with God, and that in whom the louelove of this world is, in him dwelleth not the louelove of the Father. Neuer 1 Iohn 2.then blesse thy soule in any of thy good desires, or affections. How canst thou beleeue when thou seekest Iohn. 5.glory of man, and not of God? saith our Sauiour: neuer tell me that thou burnest in holy feelings, as long as thou burnest no otherwise, then the bush, which burned, but consumed not; as long as the inward corruption of thy heart remaines vnwasted, for all these burnings, thou maist burne in hell for euer. Rest Exod 2.not then in thy deceiueable feelings and flashings of ioy. Though these thy feelings, desires, and motions be good, and come not alwaies from Sathanical illusion, but otherwhile from the spirit of God, as the Scripture plainly teacheth; yet they are not sufficient. It is well indeede that thou art come further Heb. 6. 4.then the common sort of the world, who know not what these feelings meane, that being the stonie, or thornie ground, thou art neerer to the nature of the good ground, then the high way ground: but what? because thou art come thus far in the way, wilt thou go no further? dost thou therfore think thy selfe well enough? no: as our Sauiour said to that yong man, so say I to thee, One thing is yet wanting: this same Mark 10. 21.good and mortified heart. There lies in thee some leauen of hypocrisie, that must needs be purged out, some roote of bitternesse, that must needs bee weeded vp, some thornes of couetousnesse, pride, vaine-glory, that must needs be cut downe. Lo, my brother, thou art come out of Aegypt, thou hast gone a great way in the wildernesse, thou art not now farre from Canaan, thou art come euen to the very next borders: two or three strides more would set thee in the land it selfe. Wilt thou now foolishly mocke thy selfe to thinke thy selfe in Canaan, because thou art on Mount Nebo, within sight of it, and so goe no further? Wilt thou thus loose all thy other labour and trauaile? hast thou done so many things, suffered so many things in vaine? hast thou therfore prayed, Gal. 3. 4.preached, heard, read, conferred, fasted, and suffered the tants of the wicked all this while for no other end but to go to hell together with them? Oh take a little paines more; thou hast many goodly graces, and they make thee to shine, as a goodly & beautifull temple of the holy Ghost. OnelyOnly one thing is wanting; there is some errour in the foundation; I doubt me, it is sandie; thou must needs digge a little deeper: get a little more humility of spirit, and truth and purity of heart, or else when a storme comes, al thy other labour about the building will be lost. I am the more earnest in this exhortation, because of those fearefull shipwracks, which many ships richly laden with many pretious iewels of grace, hauehave suffered, in all ages, vponupon this rocke of an euill, and vnrenewed heart. O then take heed of it, as the very bane and poyson of all grace, and so the onelyonly cause of those many deceits of the tempoporary beleeuer. Enter therefore into those darke closets of thy heart, take the light of the word, in the one hand, and the sword of the spirit, in the other: and whatsoeuer Agagite or Amalekite that light shal discouer, kill, spare none with Saul, make hauocke of all, an vniuersal distruction: saue but one, and thou destroiest thy selfe. Whatsoeuer bee the outward flourishing show of thy graces, if some sinne lye couered vnderunder them at the core, it will poyson and rot them. Oh how much better to hauehave grace lye in the heart, couered vnderunder many corruptions, as it doeth often in the regenerate! for, when corruption lies at the hart, couered vnderunder many outward graces, then it eates vp and deuoures the nourishment which grace should receiue from the heart, and so our graces become leane staruelings, and in time the thorns that at first lay hid, sprout forth, and ouergrow the corne, and so vnhappily dash those hopefull beginnings, which seemed to promise a very large & ample haruest. Contrarily, though a man hauehave many, many corruptions, and yet truth of grace lye secretly in the heart, it will, by little and little eat out all those corruptions. We see then what it is wee must specially labour for, if we would be freed from that deceit of heart, wherewith the Temporarie is beguiled, with whom the Diuell plaieth, as the cat doth with the mouse. Hee lets them in some sort go out of his hands, in that he giueth them leaue to do many things, and doth not hinder them in their ioy, and alacrity of spirit, or feruency of zeale, in which regard he is said to be cast out in the Gospell; but yet as the cat will hauehave the mouse still within her reach, that if she offer to run away, shee may presently apprehend hir: euen so doth the Deuill heere: hee is sure to hauehave thee within the reach of his paw, as long as thy heart within is polluted with the louelove of any one sinne: see then if thou canst deceiue this roring Lion, thus sporting with thee (as sometime we see the poore mouse doth the cat) wholly escaping from him, by thrusting out that one sinne, that still possesseth and defileth thy heart, and in steed thereof intertaining the word and spirit of God. Till thou dost this, thou art but in a damnable case, whatsoeuer thy flattering heart tels thee, thou must with Dauid refraine from eueryevery euil way, before thou can be the true child of God, a true keeper of his worde. I hauehave refrained my feete (that is my affections) from Psal, 119. 101.eueryevery euill way, that is from the louelove and delight thereof, that I might keepe thy worde. And Iames tells Iames 1.thee, that onelyonly that one sinne of an vngouerned tongue is sufficient to discouer the falsenesse of thy religion, what euer be thy profession.