Reply to a Book, Reply · Part 20
The anſwer to Sect: 20. examined, concerning my pretended preaching in a private houſe.
THat the truth of this paſſage may appeare, the Reader may be pleaſed to underſtand, 1, that, after my deſiſtance from the publick worke, I would have returned to my owne Country, but that it was now more unſafe and hazardous for me ſo to doe, then formerly, by a malicious and falſe report ſuggeſted againſt me in England, by one in Amſterdam (whoſe name I will conceale, for ſome reaſons, at this time) this audacious Sycophant was not aſhamed to informe that I had, in the pulpitt, rayled againſt the government of England, againſt which, the Anſwerer, and the wholl Church are able, and, I hope, ready to teſtifye for my innocency, in that particular: yea, any that have heard or knowne me, I thinck will undertake for me, that I am farr from rayling, at any time, much more in the pulpitt, and myne owne conſcience abundantly cleareth me thereof, in the ſight of God. Yet this report was too eaſily received, and thereupon much bitternes, in terrifying menaces, was expreſſed againſt me, in publick audience. This I only mention to ſhew the cauſe of my ſtaying in theſe parts. 2. Being thus hindred from returning to England, my family alſo being with me in Amſterdam, I was willing to be as proffitable, as I might, to others, without giving juſt offence to any. For this end, being requeſted by the Maſter of the family, where I ſojourned, I ſet a convenient time apart, every Lords day, about 5 a clock in the afternoone, (which was above an houre after the ſermon was ended in the Engliſh Church) to catechiſe boath our familyes, upon ſuch grounds of Divinity as I collected from the Scriptures, which I opened and applyed to them. To this excerciſe at firſt, few came, afterwards more coming to the knowledge of it, more reſorted: the greateſt number (for ought I have heard) which, at the moſt, have bene obſerved to be preſent at it, exceeded not 80 perſons. It is true, that, as the number increaſed, ſome formes were provided for them to ſit upon, to ſave the chayres & ſtooles from hurt. I had the leſſe cauſe of ſuſpicion, that this would be offencive, ſeing it hindred none from the publick ordinances which my ſelfe and all the reſt frequented conſtantly, and ſeing almoſt as great a number had reſorted to a like excerciſe, at the ſame houre, in a private family, with the Anſwerers approbation, formerly. But now the caſe was altered, and the Anſwerer rayſed cauſeles jealouſyes,Sect. 21. line 14. 14 concerning this courſe, as if it had bene the beginning of ſome Sect. But moſt injuriouſly, as not only his owne pen declareth in the following Section, but alſo thoſe that heard can teſtifye, from the wholl ſcope of that exerciſe, which was to arme them againſt the danger of being carryed away by the errours of Sectaryes, and the open carriage of it, manifeſteth. For, not only the Elders and Deacons would have ſhewed their diſlike, if any ſuch ſiniſter courſes had bene attempted, as their place required, but alſo thoſe, who came as ſpyes (and we knew to be ſuch, yet excluded none) would have diſcloſed it to the Anſwerer, and divulged it to the world. Yea? and myne owne conſcience knoweth, that one mayne incouragement of my upholding that private excerciſe, was, that thereby a rent in the Church might be prevented, and the publick peace preſerved, whileſt the members were ſomewhat quieted and contented with that helpe, in private, which was denyed them in publick; and myne owne heart is privy to my intendments, at that time, of doing the beſt offices I could, for the quiet ſetling of a faythfull man, in the publick worke, if Gods providence ſhould offer one unto them, whileſt I ſtayed with them, that ſo peace and concord might be wrought between the Paſtor and people, if it might be, before my departure thence. This was my intent. And the event ſhewed that J was not wholly miſtaken in my conjecture, as will be evident to him that ſhall compare the carriage of matters, whileſt I lived among them, with the accidents that happened ſince. Yet, when I perceived that the Anſwerer tooke ſuch offence at this exerciſe, I deſiſted, before any ſpake with Mr. Wh: from the Claſſis, but with me none of them ever ſpake about it. Thus J may ſay with him in Ariſtophanes. foreign For doing well, I ſuffer ill. But the ſervant is not above his Lord.