Christian Commonwealth, Part 2
The ſecond part of the duty of Parents.
The 15. Chapter.
THis ſecond part of the duy of Parents, will ſeeme harſh & very diſpleaſing vntounto many men of our time, which doe ſuppoſe, that when they hauehave brought vp their Children to ſome yeares, and as they thinke to bee able to make ſome ſhift in the world, & eſpecially if they hauehave brought them vp vntounto ſome Art, Trade, or meanes for them to get their liuing by in time to come, that then their charge and care for them is paſt, and that they hauehave fully diſcharged themſelues of their duty concerning them, and may then diſpoſe of that goods, or eſtate, which they hauehave at their pleaſure, either from their Children, or to whō or to which of them they pleaſe, as their affection ſerveth, and this is an error in many men, and yet this may not be, for neither are they ſo diſcharged, nor may lawfully ſo diſpoſſeſſe their Children or diſpoſe of their goods.
Obiect. And one of theſe men begineth to cavile with me already about this matter, and telleth mee that I am much diſceaved, for ſayth he, may I not do with mine own goods what I will? which with mine owne ſore laboer I hauehave gathered? I hauehave nothing (ſaith he) that came to me by inheritance, nor any friend that gaue mee a penny to begin the world withall, and I hauehave had ſundry wiues, and hauehave had Children by each of them, and I confeſſe I hauehave had good dowries with ſome of them, & by the good endevours of them and my ſelfe, God hath bleſſed me with that that I hauehave, and ſhall I not now bee maſter of mine own? may I not giuegive mine owne goods to whom I pleaſe? or giuegive them to which of my children I doe moſt affect, either Sonne or Daughter? or it may be my Sonne will not bee ruled by me, or is an vnthrift, ſhall he then waſt and conſume with his vnthriftineſſe that which I hauehave labored for? no, I know how to prevent him and that by law too, or if I giuegive it wholy to my dauter, who ſhall barre me from doing it, or appoynt me how I ſhall diſpoſe mine owne? I hauehave with great care and charge brought them vp to theſe yeares, & now they bee able to get their owne liuing, let them ſhift in the name of God, as I hauehave done.
Anſwer. Here is a large diſcourſe to ſmall purpoſe, and yet there bee two many of your oppinion, and no doubt but that you do thinke you hauehave well ſpoken, and ſurely if it had beene wiſely ſpoken it had beene ſo indeed, but know you that the wiſedome of theIob. 37. world is fooliſhneſſe with God, for in his word, by which wee are to be ruled, he hath commanded vsus otherwaies.
For although you hauehave brought vp your Children to the yeares of diſcreſſion, ſo that then you thinke they are able to make ſhift for themſelues as you ſay, yet may you not then ſo leaue them to themſelues, for there is yet more to bee done that muſt not bee left vndone, for thou muſt prouide for thy ſonne a Wife, & for thy Daughter an Husband, & ſo as the wiſe man ſayth: Thou ſhalt performe a waighty matter: Eccle. 7.thou muſt not leaue the younglingsParents ought to provide for the marriages of their children, both ſonnes & daughters. to themſelues for to make their owne choyſe, but thou muſt doe it, and that in his due time: we find that Abraham was very carefull to performe this duty, althought he was ſo farreGen. 24. in yeares that hee could not travile about the buſineſſe himſelfe, for he appoynted his ſervant the ſteward of his houſe what to doe and where to provide a Wife for his Sonne Iſaacke: and thus did Iſaacke vntounto Iacob his Sonne,Gen. 28. appoynting him where to goe & there only to make his choiſe: thus did Hagar although but a woman, & dwelling in the wilderneſſe, yet ſhee provided aGen. 25. Wife for her ſonne Iſhmaell.
Yea the very heathen did obſerue this rule, for Sechem the fatherGen. 34. of Hamor did ſue vntounto Iacob for his daughter Dina, to bee a wife vntounto his ſonne: yea, Ibz…n Iudge of Iſraell though hee hadIug. 12. Thirty ſons & as many daughters, yet he did provide for them all, both Wiues for his ſonnes, & Husbands for his daughters, and many ſuch proofes wee hauehave in the Scrptures, by all which it appeareht that Parents hauehave alwaies euen from the beginning, beene vere carefull to obſerue this as a principall poynt of their duty to their Children.
And this muſt be done in due time, thou muſt not doe as too many do in theſe daies, which wil not ſuffer their childrē to marry but when they will, & to whomParents not to force or limite their childrens mariage. they plaſe, nay fathers will doe more then fathers ouhgt to doe, they will diſinherite their Sons, and bereaue their Children of their patrimonyes, if they will not marry to their liking, where wealth may ſerue to ſatisfie their coveteous mindes, & ſo in ſtead of being kind and loving Fathers vntounto their Children, they become tyrants vntounto them, not ſo much regarding the younglings likings, whereby they may liue the reſt of their daies in louelove together, and ſo bring vp their children together in the feare of God as their owne affections.
Whereupon by ſuch enforced marriages if often commeth to paſſe, that when the young couples beginne as it were to taſt each of other, they ſo diſlike one of the other, that they forſake one another, the Wife the companieThe danger that enſueth by conſtrayned marriages of her Husband, or the Husband of the Wife, and fall to that abhominable act of adultery, and thus ſuch Parents doe become both culpable and authors of their ſinne.
Yet I doe not ſpeake againſt this, …as giuing liberty vntounto youthes that they may marry at their owne pleaſure or liking without the conſent of Parents, or abridging the authority of Parents in this caſe, God forbid I ſhould ſo doe or thinke, but I ſpeake this againſt marriages conſtrayned & limited, for marriage was ordained as a remedy1. Cor. 7. againſt ſinne, but they which prolong the time of their childrens marriage, either for pleaſing their own affections in their choyſe, or for the deſire of wealth through coveteouſneſſe, or for that they wil not part with any of their ſubſtance in dowrie with them, ſuch I ſay are many times the occaſion of their childrens ſinne, for Saint Paule ſayth it is better to marry, then to burne in deſire.
Had Iudah giuen his daughter in law vntounto his ſonne Shelah inGen. 38. time according to his promiſe, he had not committed that horrible fact of Inceſt with her himſelfe: Againe, when Samſon had made his choyſe of a wife, of that heathen generation, the vncircumciſed Philiſtines which were not onelyonly enemies to the people of Iſraell, but alſo vntounto God himſelfe, when hee deſired this woman of his Father, and would needs marry her, hee did not diſinherit him, or caſt him out of his favour for it, but yet wiſely rebuketh him ſaying, is there neuer a wife among the daughters of thy breatheren and amongst all my people, that thou muſt goe to take a Wife of the vncircumciſed Philiſtians? yet when hee ſaw that his affection was ſetled onWhat Parents ought to doe in caſe of mariage to their children. her, he was content both to goe with him, & to procure the mariage for him, & it is ſayd there, that this marriage did come of the Lord, though his Father knew it not, I could wiſh therefore that Parents would follow the counſaile of Manoah in this…g. …4. place, by their wiſedomes to perſwade when occaſion ſhall ſerue, but nor otherwiſe.
The 16. Chapter.
ANd now concerning how Parents ought to beſtow their goods, wee reade that Abraham wasGen. 15. minded to make Eliazer the ſteward of his houſe, heire of all that he had, but it was before he had any Children, and yet hee was forbidden by God himſelfe ſo to doe, for God hauing determined to giuegive him iſſue of hisA plaine profe that a man may not giuegive his goods from his children. own body, would not ſuffer him ſo to doe, but telleth him directly that one that ſhould proceed out of his owne bowels, hee ſhould be his heyre.
And the Prophet Dauid hee telleth vsus likewiſe, that it is the ſpeciall gift of God & his greatPſal. 127. bleſſing vntounto man, when he hath heyres of his owne body to poſſeſſe thoſe lands or goods which hee hath gathered together, and ſhall leaue behind him: and this alone might ſerue to approue that a man may not diſpoſe of his goods from his children, but the Scriptures are plentifull of theſe examples.
Abraham gaue his goods vntountoGen. 25. his Sonne Iſacke as you ſee he was appoynted of God, Aaron Exod. 28.was commanded of God to ſantifie his ſonnes vntounto the order of prieſthood, vntounto which the Lord had choſen him, and Elye did1. Sam. 2. place his ſonnes in the ſame order, nay, he did not take it from thē although hee knew that they were wicked: and Dauid did not1. King. 1. at his death devide his Kingdome vntounto his ſonnes, but left it wholy vntounto his ſonne Salomon, 1. King. 11.neither did he deuide it, but left it vntounto his ſonne Rehoboam, and he alſo left it vntounto his ſon Ab…am, 1. King. 14.and he vntounto his ſonne Aſa, and2. Cro. 1…. he left it vntounto his ſon Iehoſaphat, and Iehoſaphat left it wholy vntounto2. Cron. 13. his ſon Iehorā, & yet we finde he had ſixe Sonnes beſides Iehoram, 2. Cron. 16.all which he left not vnprovided for, but gaue vntounto each of them great portions and riches, aſwell2. Cron. 2…. of gold and ſiluer, as ſtrong citties for their habitation of dwelling, but the kingdome hee gaue wholy vntounto Iehoram his ſon, becauſeThat the eldeſt ſon hath a prerogatiue aboue the reſt of his bretheren. he was the firſt borne, the eldeſt of them all.
So that wee ſee now that it came to him by his birth, and as being the eldeſt ſonne of his father, and not through his fathers affection towards him, and yet we cannot ſay that hee erred in doing this, for it is ſaid of him, that he did that which was right and good in the ſight of God, & therefore it may not be doubted but that God did direct him in this the diſpoſing of his Kingdome and goods, aſwell as in other things.
Thus alſo you ſee it is a cleare caſe that the eldeſt ſonne hath a prerogatiue aboue the reſt of his bretheren, and therefore muſt needs be reſpected aboue them, and this care we find to be in Ioſeph, for his ſonne Manaſſah whenG…n. 4…. he would hauehave had his father to hauehave layd his right hand vponupon his head rather then the yonger, & from theſe & ſuch like places in the booke of God as a ground vnfailable, hauehave all natiōs almoſt in their lawes, held this as a principall, that the eldeſt ſon ſhould hold and enioy, all ſuch lands as hauehave come vntounto them either by diſcent from their Anceſtors, or hauehave been purchaſed by their Parents.
But what ſhall we ſay of thoſe men, that will not onelyonly diſpoſſeſſe their ſons from thoſe lands which they themſelues hauehave purchaſed, and that vponupon very ſmall occaſions▪ but alſo to maintayneA great fault in Parents. their owne ryotous and vicious kind of liuing, will diſpoſſeſſe them of all ſuch lands or goods which are their childrens owne proper right euen from their anceſtors? what an heavie account hauehave theſe men to make vntounto God for theſe things? but I hope I hauehave now ſatifſied the worldling of whom before we ſpake, that hee may not giuegive his goods frō his Children, or vntounto which or whom hee pleaſe, for God will hauehave the generations proceeding to receiue the benefits & labours of the former, as the children the fruits of the Parents labours: but if he wil needs bee partiall to his children, I will tell him yet how he may doe it, Iſmaell may not bee heire with Iſack, they bee not fit yoake-fellowes, yet Abraham may giuegive Iſhmaell a portion, but it muſt be but breadGen. 21. and a bottle of water, & he muſt ſend him away with it too, when hee hath it, for they may not dwell or enioy the heritage together, becauſe he is not the ſon of his Wife but of his ſervant.
But Iſack becauſe hee is borne in lawfull wedlocke, hee muſt be his Fathers heyre, and ſo heeBaſtards may not be ioyned in equality With children borne in lawfull wedlocke. may diſpoſe of his Baſtards, hee may giuegive them portions, but you ſee how, they muſt bee but ſmall ones, he may not giuegive his Childrens portions vntounto thē, I meane the ſubſtance which his children ſhould poſſeſſe of right, there be too many guilty of this fact in our daies the more the pitty.
But this worldly wiſe man hauing no lands, but ſuch wealth or goods as by his labours hee hath gathered, …hinketh hee may be bold with that, to diſpoſe of it where he pleaſe, and how, for ſo he ſayth: but I tell thee nay, for though it be but goods, yet thou muſt not do it, for Abraham had no land at the time of his death, more then a little peeceGen. 25. of one field, which hee bought for a buriall place for his dead, but dwelt in Tents, and was a ſtranger himſelfe all his dayes in that land which God did promiſe to giuegive vntounto his ſeede, and after performed it, but being exceeding rich both in goods and cattell, yet you ſee he might not giuegive theſe goods from his ſonne, for whether it bee goods or lands, yet no man may attribute more vntounto himſelfe then this, that God hath giuen them vntounto him for his neceſſary vſe in this life, but after for the good of his ofsprings to come, wherein the great wiſedome and mercy ofThe wiſedom and mercy of God in prouiding for vsus before we bee. our God appeareth in this his worke, which ſhould ſtirre vsus vp vntounto great thankefulneſſe for ſo great bleſſings by his divine wiſdome & power provided, laying vp in ſtore for vsus before we come into the world by the hand of our Parents.
The 17. Chapter.
ANd as I hauehave in this former Chapter proved that a man may not diſpoſe of his goods from his Children, and amongſt them that the firſt borne ſonne hath a prerogatiue aboue the reſt? ſo now I muſt ſpeake concerning the Daughter, what is to be don for her, for this worldling before named, ſayth hee would giuegive his goods if he pleaſed from his ſon to his Daughter, but he may not do that neither, for in al the booke of God wee hauehave no ſuch warrant or example …ndeed we doe not find amongſt all the men afornamed, any that maketh mention of his Daughter, & yet wee know they had daughters as well as ſons, whō no doubt but they did provide for, & did not leaue without portiōs & dowries for though Iacob doth not make mention of his daughter Din… Gen. 48.amongſt his Sonnes when he… gaue them their inheritance, yet may wee not thinke but that as a Father hee prouided for her other waies, but hee did not ioyne her in equaltie with them▪ for ſtill in all times and places, the ſonne hath had his prerogatiue as I hauehave proved; aboue the Daughter.
And with great wiſedome it is done too, for the man did notThe reaſon why man hath a prerogatiue aboue the woman. firſt ſinne in the tranſgreſſion of the Commandement of God, but the woman did firſt ſinne, & therefore was ſhee iuſtly puniſhedGen. 3. with ſeruitude not to bee in equality of rule equall with the man, but to be in ſubiection vntounto him, and he to rule ouer her: indeede if ſhee had kept her in the bounds of her obedience vntounto her maker, and not beene the originall of ſin, it may bee ſuppoſed, ſhee had beene equall inThe perogatiue that man hath, ought not to bee diſpenced with. authority with him, cheke mate, and no diverſity of ſuperioritie had been betwixt them, but now the caſe is altered, there is no equality in this nature, but the man hath wholy the prerogatiue, & therefore great were the offence of that man, which ſhould take the benefit away frō the man, and giuegive the ſame vntounto the woman, as from his ſonne to his daughter, but the proofe following is greater: indeede wee finde that Caleb the ſonne of Iephune gaue vntounto his daughterIoſhu. 15. Achſab the whole country of Hebron, with both the ſprngs aboue and the ſprings beneath, but ſhe was the onelyonly daughter of her father, and hee then had no ſons liuing, and God had promiſed to giuegive that land to him and to his ſeede.
And yet Moſes was in doubt himſelfe whether that a woman might inherite land or no, for we find that the daughters of Zel… phehad came vntounto Moſes and demandedNum. 27. a portion of land for their inheritance among the families of their tribe, becauſe all the males of the family of their father was deceaſed, but it ſeemed vntounto him ſo difficult a matter to anſwer, that he was fai…e to bring the cauſe before the Lord, and the Lord anſwered, that they demanded but right, for ſayd he, if a man doe die and leaue noHere the matter is by God himſelfe fully decided. ſons, then the inheritance ſhould turne to the Daughters, againſ… this who can or dare ſpeake, and now I hope I hauehave proved that no man may giuegive the portion due vntounto his ſon, from him, to his daughter.
But I hauehave another obiection yet of this politition to anſwer vntounto, I doe remember he ſayd he had married ſundry wiues, & he had had children by each of thē, & it may be, it is with him as it is with a great many more, the firſt wife is forgotten & her children & her childrē are as little regarded, & therfore to pleaſe his laſt wife, hee will ſuſpence with the others children: there be too many vſe ſuch trickes in theſe daies, but if hee will be a ſcholler in Gods ſchoole, he muſt learne another leſſon.
For we ſhal find, that if a man hauehave had children by ſundry wiues, and that hee loueth the one more then hee did the oother, if his firſt borne ſonne heDeu. 21. the ſon of her that is not lo…, yet when the time cōmeth th… hee giueth his goods to his children,A principall poynt for fathers to regard, and againſt partiality. he may not make the ſonne of her whom hee loueth his firſt borne, before the ſonne of the hated, which is inddeed the firſt borne, but he ſhall acknowledg… the ſon of the hated for the firſt borne, & giuegive vntounto him a double portion of all that he hath, for he is the firſt of his ſtrength, and to him belongeth the right of the firſt borne, & thus we ſee plainely that there may be no partiality vſed in theſe cauſes.
But now to conclude this laſt part, and to make the matter yet more plainer then wee hauehave done, and to proue that the father may not giuegive his goods frō his children, nay, that he hath no right ſo to doe, but that of right they belong vntounto his Children, we hauehave yet a very playne example for this matter in the ſtorie of the prodigall ſon, who comming to his father for a portiō of his goods, he doth not ſay vntounto him, I pray you father that you will be pleaſed to beſtow vponuponA plaine proofe of the right which the child hath in the eſtate of the father. me ſome ſmall portion, either of your goods or mony, which you will, & what you pleaſe or may well ſpare, he doth not ſo, nor doth he deſire to lend him ſuch or ſo much money neither, no he is more bold with him thē ſo, for he cōmeth bluntly and plainely vntounto him, neither to begge nor to borrow of him, but to aske his owne, ſaying: father, giuegive mee the portion of goods that falleth vntounto mee, or as ſome tranſlations hauehave it, the portion that is due vntounto me, or my portion.
Surely, if he had had no right nor intereſt in the goods of his father, hee durſt not hauehave beene ſo bold and ſaucy as thus to demaund or challenge a portion thereof as he doth, neither doth hee ſtand to his fathers curteſie, what hee will giuegive him, for as he doth demand but his owne, ſo heLuke. 15. demaundes no more, nor hee asketh no leſſe: well, then it appeareth it was his right.
But now for the confirmation yet further of this matter, let vsus ſee how the Father taketh the buſineſſe, for if his ſonne hauehaveA confirmatiō yet further of this matter. exceeded the bounds of his duty, no doubt but as a father hee will ſoone reproue and correct him for it, but here is no ſuch matter, and therefore it doth appeare plainely that he did no more the he might doe, for the kind and louing father preſently without delay, yeelding vntounto his formes requeſt, deuided his goods betwixt his two ſons, & ſo hee giueth vntounto him his portion: how many fathers follow this parterne in theſe dayes, and will heare their ſonne in ſuch a caſe? nay, ſome will ſpare nothing at all while they liue, others will ſpare very little, and ſome perhaps doe ſomewhat, but vponupon conditions hard enough.
This ſon when hee had receiued his full portion, and by his vnthriftineſſe and ryoting had ſperit & waſted this his portion, & poverty ſo hardly oppreſſing him, that hee thereby was conſtrained to returne vntounto his father againe, who with ioy yet doth againe receiue him: his elder brother angry herewith, tels his father that for al his long ſervice done vntounto him, yet hee neuer gaue him ſo much as a Kidd to make merry with his friends, and ſaith hee, doſt thou thus for ſuch an vnthrift? but his father anſwered, ſon, be cōtent thou art alwaies with mee, and all that I hauehave is thine, what could hee more ſay then this? and doth not this plainely teach vsus, that a father may not giuegive his goods frō his children, for if it were all his ſonnes, where was any to giuegive vntounto others, or if hee had beene partiall in the diſtribution therof by giuing that to one which belonged to the other, then hee had done wrong alſo.
But it may bee he will yet obiect and ſay, this was but a parable which our Sauiour Chriſt ſpake concerning the ſinner that had run aſtray, who yet by true repentance humbling himſelfe vntounto his heauenly father, hee receiueth him to his grace and fauour againe, and not a poynt of doctrine to be taken in this caſe:Obiections anſwered, and the whole matter confirmed with truth. but thou erreſt in that poynt alſo, for although it be parable as indeed our bleſſed Sauiour ſpake many things in parables, yet he being the very truth and wiſedome it ſelfe, could not commit any errour in this or any other parable, but ſtill by one truth expreſſed another, and therefore to ſay otherwiſe, were erronious & blaſphemie.
But yet I muſt anſwer one obiection more which this worldling make, which is this: I… may bee ſayth he, that my ſonne is diſobedi… vntounto me, or is an v… thrift, and ſhall hee leawdly and vnthriftily waſt my goods, or that which I h… laboured for…. To which I anſwer…, miſta…e me nor, for though I hauehave ſhewed that a father ought …do thus for his ſonne, yet I doe not ſay he ought to doe this for a diſobedient, wicked, or vnthriftie ſon, for ſuch a one I hauehave ſhewed ought to bee puniſhed by the Magiſtrate and that ſeuerely, neither did the father of this prodigall giuegive him a new portion whē hee had ryoted away that whichThat this priuiledge belongeth not vntounto lewd and wicked children. he gaue him, although vponupon his repentance he receiued him into his fauour againe, neither doe we finde that any of theſe aforenamed, gaue any double portionGen. 27. to any of their ſonnes, Iſaok had but one bleſſing to giuegive, though hee had two ſonnes, nay, theſe men did giuegive theſe portions vntounto their ſons at the time of their deathes, but not before: but if a father for the aduancement of his ſonne bee pleaſed out of his louelove to ſpare him ſom part of his goods while hee doth liue, yet if hee waſtfully & royotouſly conſume it, I ſee not that his fatherParents ſupplying the wnats of vicious children becommeth authors of their vnthriftineſſe. ſhould feede him with a new ſupply, for ſo he may be authour of his ſonnes vnthriftineſſe. And thus briefely you ſee how a man may or ſhould diſpoſe of his goods by the rule of the word of God, and this may ſuffice to ſatiſfie our pollitition, for this matter.