Christian Commonwealth, Part 1
The duty of Husbands.
The firſt Chapter.
ANd the cauſe why I hauehave firſt begun with this duty of Husbands, is for that I find it to bee the firſt degree which God gaue vntounto Man after his Creation: & therein, that when God gaue vntounto man the rule of the whole earth, and the domination of allGen. 2. the creatures therein contained, yet, vntill hee gaue vntounto him a Wife, hee had no true content in all the reſt beſides, for eueryevery creature had ſolace in their kind except Man: but ſo was it not with Man till God gaue vntountoMan had no true content till God gaue vntounto him a Wife. him a Wife: Then finding her a companion fit to aſſociate him ſelfe withall, with her he ſetled his content. And this did God for Man in the time of his innocencie, giuegive vntounto him this wife, thereby leauing vntounto vsus this inſtruction, that we alſo ought to liue ſo vprightly, ſo holily, and ſo purely in the ſtate of wedlocke, that we ſinne not againſt God, nor againſt one another: And heere is one eſpeciall thing to be noted, that God gaue vntounto Man but one Wife, and not two or three, or many, and yet hee could hauehave giuen him more as well as one, if he had knowne it meete ſo to be: But the Prophet Malachie doth tell vsus why hee gaue him but one: becauſe ſaithMalachie. 2. he, he ſought a godly ſeed.
See heere my bretheren, God reiecteth your ſeed of baſtardie, begotten in your filthy fornication and abomninable adultery, he chuſeth none of theſe, it is the ſeed of lawfull wedlocke whereof he maketh his choyſe to inherite his Kingdome, and raigne in glory with his beloued Sonne.
And whence proceeded this breach of Gods Commandement at firſt? came it not from that wicked blood of Caine, was not Lamech that murtherer likeThe firſt breach of wedlocke from Lamech. his Father the firſt author therof? yea he was ſo: for you plainly ſee that God at the firſt ordained it not ſo to be, and what heGen. 4. firſt ordained, hee ſtill confirmeth: for when hee drownedGen. 7. the whole world, yet he preſerued vntounto Noah but one woman, and that his owne Wife, thereby teaching vntounto man that he ought to keepe himſelfe vntounto his owne wife onelyonly, & when he gaue his lawes vntounto his owne choſen people with his owne hand writing,Exodus. 20. he then ſaith, Thou ſhalt not couet thy neighbours wife, ſpeaking in the ſingular number, ſo that by him we find no nomination of any plurall.
Obiect. But it may be you will obiect and ſay, that the Saints and ſervants of God as Abraham, Iacob, Dauid and others, hauehave not obſerued this rule, but hauehave had diuers wiues, and therefore being the beloued and choſen of God, they could not erre in theſe things. Anſwer. To this I anſwer, it pleaſed God to permit his ſeruants to doe many things which hee commanded not, he ſuffered Abraham to ſay Sarah his wife wasGen. 11. his ſiſter, and Ioſeph to ſweare byGen. 44. the life of Pharoah, and Dauid to2. Sam. 11. commit adultery and murther, and many other the like, and yet we know that all theſe thinges were directly againſt the will of1. King. 11. God, Salomon had many wiues indeed, but they drew him to Idolatry.
We reade that Moſes ſuffered the people of Iſraell to giuegive their wiues a bill of diuorcement,Deu. 24. and ſo to put them away, but our bleſſed Sauiour tellethMath. 10. the Iewes that it was for the hardnes of their hearts, and to preuent further euils that Moſes permitted it ſo to bee, and that from the beginning it was not ſo.
But to returne to our former matter againe, let vsus ſee from whence this wife came that GodIf a man will reſpect the gift of his friend, for his friends ſake, how much more ought he to eſteeme of his wife which God giues vntounto him? hath giuen vntounto man, that ſo of him ſhe may accordingly be regarded, as indeed ſhee ſhould: we find it to be moſt true that of mans owne ſelfe, God made him this compannion and wife, and that not from the head of man neither, leaſt ſhee ſhould claime to rule where her power conſiſts not, nor of the foot, leaſt ſhee ſhould be diſdayned & deſpiſed of her Husband, but from the very body is ſhee taken, nay it is not enough for thee to ſpare of thine own fleſh for to make thee a wife of, but thou muſt ſpare a bone too, if thou wilt hauehave a fit companion for thee.
And now (oh man) hauing receiued ſo rich a Iewell, rich and deare indeed being ſo neare vntounto thee, and that from the onelyonly hand of the great and Almighty God, ſhee being the worke of his owne hands, ſure it muſt needs be exceeding good which he maketh, and of an exceeding value which he vouchſafeth to giuegive, and conſider it well and you ſhall find it ſo to bee: wee hauehave an old prouerbe, that it is a ſweet collop that is cut out of the owne fleſh, but I am ſure it muſt needs bee ſweet and deere, for that is both of thine owne fleſh and bone: Oh man, be wiſe in vſing this thy Iewell as thou oughteſt, leaſt thou bee found vnworthy of her by him that gaue her vntounto thee, and ſo hee take her againe, & then too late thou lament thy loſſe.
Will you hauehave my aduice herein? I ſee no better way then to beHow to keepe a good wi…e when a man hath her. wiſe and diſcreet in the vſing of her, nor any fitter place to keepe her in, then that from whence ſhee came, neere thy heart man, I meane, I know ſhee came from thence, lay her there againe, lay her there againe, let her not ſtray from thence, nay, locke her in there with the key of good diſcretion, and ſo ſhalt thou be ſure to find a comfortable treaſure of her at thy need, a comfortable treaſure indeed as thou mayeſt vſe her.
You will happily ſay vntounto me, Obiect. I ſpeake well for a good Wife, for ſhee deſerues that place indeed: but there are many wiues of ſuch lewd and froward condition, that their Husbands are moſt happieſt when they are fartheſt from them, and ſuch a wife deſerues not that place. I anſwer Anſwer. with the words of Salomon, Eccle. 16.A vertuous woman ſhall bee giuen vntounto him that feareth the Lord, and therefore he that will hauehaveGood counſell for a man to get a good wife by. ſuch a one, let him ſeeke to bee vertuous himſelfe firſt, that ſo he may obtayne ſuch a bleſſing of the Lord, for ſure happy is the man that hath ſuch a one, her price is farre aboue the pearles, his treaſure is vnvaluable, if I ſhould explaine her vertues as much as Salomon, yet I ſhould not at full expreſſe her worth, but leaue her as he hath done, that her owne workes may giuegive her her due praiſe.
The Second Chapter.
ANd now wee ſee that God hath giuen vntounto man ſo deare and pretious a Companion to liue with him, let vsus ſee what dutyes he would hauehave theſe to performe one towards the other, and firſt to beginne with the man, becauſe he is the head,Gen. 3. for ſo we find him to bee: And if in this caſe wee ſeeke the whole booke of God through, yet wee ſhall find the effect and end thereof to be wholy and only louelove, for Saint Paule teachethEphe. 5. that men ought to louelove their wiues as their owne bodies, and he ſheweth the reaſon of it, for ſaith he, no man euer yet hated his owne fleſh, but nouriſheth & cheriſheth it, euen as Chriſt doth the Church, for thus theGen. 23. Saints and ſeruants of God gouerned their wiues in times paſt, Abraham loued Sarah his Wife, Iſaack loued Rebecka his Wife,Gen. 26. yea, the ſtorie recordeth that they ſported together.
This hath that great ProphetIt is not enough for a man to liue quietly with his wife, but he muſt liue louingly with her alſo. & ſeruant of God Moſes expreſſed thereby, to ſhow vntounto men, that it is not enough for them to liue peacably and quietly with their wiues, but they muſt liue louingly with them alſo: thus did Iacob louelove his wife, yeeldingGen. 28. ſervice to his vnckle and maiſter Fourteen yeares, to the end hee might enioy her after: Elkana 1. Sam. 1.loued Hanna his wife, and Sampſon Iudg. 1. Tob. …his wife, and Tobias and others their wiues: And you ſee it muſt be no ordinary louelove neither, but it muſt bee like that extraordinary great louelove which Christ ſhewed vntounto his Church,Ephe. 5. who gaue himſelfe for it, thatMan is to louelove his wife as Chriſt his Church. hee might make it vntounto himſelfe a glorious Church, not hauing ſpot or wrinckle, or any ſuch thing, but that it ſhould be wholy & without blame. I will ſay with the bleſſed Apoſtle, this is a great ſecret, yea ſuch a one which man is not commaunded in all poynts to imitate, for the man is not commanded to giuegive his life for his wife, as Christ did for his Church, and yet he is toIn what poynts to Imitate Chriſt. protect her in all perils and dangers, euen as hee doth his Church: he muſt gouerne her in his wiſedome by the word of God, both by continuall inſtructions from thence, and by his owne louing and gentle behauiour towards her and all others, yea, he muſt be laborious in his calling, that ſo he may prouide all thinges neceſſary for her, for ſo doth Chriſt for his Church, he is alwaies protecting it and prouiding for it, For this cauſe ſhall a man leaue his Father & Mat. 19. 5.his Mother, and ſhall cleaue vntounto his wife, and they twayne ſhall bee one fleſh.
Saint Peter being himſelfe a married man, doth giuegive many notable inſtructions like theſe, who ſpeaking by the ſpirit of God, and in the knowledge hee had of marriage, yet impoſeth this duty vntounto men, ye Husbands dwell with your Wiues as men of 1. Pet. 3.knowledge, giuing honour vntounto the woman as vntounto the weaker veſſell, euen … they which are heyres together of the grace of life, that your prayers be not interrupted: and the wiſe man giueth thee this counſell, not to depart from a diſcreet and Eccle. 7.good woman which is fallen vntounto thee for thy portion in the feare of the Lord, (for ſayth he) the guift of her honeſty is farre aboue gold: If thou hauehave a wife after thine owne mind, forſake her not, and commit not thy ſelfe to the hatefull, vſe thy ſelfe to liue ioyfully with thy wife whom thou loueſt, all the dayes of thy life, which is but vaine that God hath giuen thee vnderunder the Sunne, all the dayes of thy vanity, for that is thy portion in this life of all thy labour and trauile that thou takeſt vnderunder the ſunne.
And our Sauiour Christ himſelfe confirming on earth what his Father had done in paradice, vouchſafed to grace a nuptiall feaſt with his bleſſed preſence: & to expreſſe his louelove the more which hee bare to the holy vnion then there knitte betwixt theIohn. 2. Man and his wife, he expreſſeth his glory in ſhewing his firſt miracle which he wrought on earth at this mariage, & that of ioy, by turning there water into wine, to comfort and glad their hearts withall.
And now that wee hauehave found that the moſt principall duty ofThe principal duty of the Husband towards his wife is louelove. the Husband towards his Wife is louelove, & that the word of God teacheth vsus in what nature to expreſſe it, let vsus looke into the glaſſe of our times and ſee how this duty of louelove is performed, but I feare that among a hundred wee ſhall ſcarce finde one that ſtriueth to performe this duty of louelove as he ought, and too many that know not of any duty at allFew to bee found which louelove their wiues as they ſhould. to be obſerued, or at leaſt wiſe will know of none, and euen of thoſe that doe know all, and yet make no conſcience to performe any: for who, or where is hee that loueth his wife as himſelfe, and nouriſheth and cheriſheth her euen as Christ doth his Church, nay, ſee we not rather the contrary, doe wee not ſee dayly many which conſume great eſtates which their wiues doe bring them, through their owne vicious liues, ſome byFoure chiefe cauſes of the ruinating of mans eſtate. idleneſſe, ſome by gaming, ſome by drunkenneſſe, ſome by whoring, but of this I ſhall ſpeake hereafter, ſome by one thing & ſome by another, who can deny but if there were louelove in the man to his wife, he would be more carefull in preſeruing his and her eſtate then thus? and yet wee ſee dayly a good woman brought to beggery by ſuch lewd Husbands: where is any duty or louelove in ſuch?
And are there not others which to ſhew their authority,Churliſh husbands voyd of the knowledge of the law of God. will hold their wiues (in ſtead of fellowſhip) in ſuch ſubiection & ſeruitude, that no ſeruant will performe the like vntounto them, being euen a very Nabal vntounto them in churliſhnes of ſpeech & crabbed conditions, that the poore wife is euen at her wits end in ſeeking to giuegive him content… where is wiſedome in ſuch Husbands, that ſhould gouerne their wiues according to knowledge? alas it appeareth that theſe men forgetting their duty to God, know not how to performe any duty at all towards their Wiues: Others there are that will follow no vocation or labour at all, but liue idely and lewdly & put the poore woman to ſhift for all: ſhee muſt prouide for her ſelfe, her Children; and her idle Husband too, or if he hap ſometimes to get ſomething abroad, yet ſhee ſhall bee ſure to be neuer the better for it, he wil bring none home to comfort her, nay, not ſo much as to put cloathes to his owne backe, but that his poore Wife muſt prouide them, yea and diſcharge the Landlord too, or elſe ſhee ſhal want a houſe to put her head in: nay, hauing a profeſſion to doe all this ſufficiently of himſelfe, yet will he no way benefit his wife or himſelfe, but wil impoſe all ſtill vponupon her: what ſhall we ſay of ſuch men? and yet ſuch there be, I proteſt vponupon mine owne knowledge I know ſome of them. Saint Paul ſaith, he is worſe then an Infidell that doth No feare of God, nor louelove in them which doe not prouide for their families.not prouide for his family: but to caſt pearles among ſuch ſwine is not meet, for they will ſtoppe their eares at the voyce of the charmer, charme hee neuer ſo wiſely: I will leaue them to the iuſt iudgement of God, who wil aſſuredly giuegive them their due, what louelove doe theſe men ſhow? nay, is there any louelove at all in them, or any feare of God either?
It is a harts griefe to any good Chriſtian, or well minded man to ſee and heare the dayly contentions, vproares, quarrelles, and diſagreements betwixt husbands and wiues in theſe dayes, and yet who can deny but the world is too full of ſuch, what ſhall wee ſay to theſe thinges? excuſe it who will by laying theFaults in the Husband, prouing him the cauſe of the diſagreeing betwixt his wife and himſelfe. fault on the Wiues, I ſay ſtill the greateſt part is in the Husband, hee by his vnkind and churliſh ſpeeches not fitting a husband to giuegive vntounto his wife, his vnthriftines in waſting abroad, what all doe labour for at home, his drunkeneſſe, his raſh furiouſnes, theſe with the reſt aforeſaid and a number more not here expreſſed, he (I ſay) by theſe occaſions is dayly the cauſe of all theſe euills.
The third Chapter.
ANd there bee ſome of this number, that will know no other way to gouerne their wiues but by extreamity: why brother,No way for a man to bring his with to louelove him by compulſion. doſt thou thinke to make thy Wife louelove thee by beating of her, alas ſilly man, how art thou deceiued? louelove is of another nature, ſhee will run freely of her ſelfe where ſhe liketh, but will not bee drawne or compelled by any force how great ſoener.
And how canſt thou thinke to hauehave her to ſhew any kindneſſe or louelove vntounto thee, when thou ſeekeſt to rule by force? would'ſt thou hauehave her to ſtand in awe of thee, it is thy ſeruants duty and thy childs, not thy Wifes: I confeſſe ſhee is to bee obedient vntounto thee? but her obedience muſtThe wifes obedience muſt proceed from louelove. proceed through louelove, and a man may draw more from a woman by louing and kind vſing of her,More may be done by louelove with a woman then by force. then any way by force, nay, more then he will or can expect of her, for ſhee is of that free nature where ſhee loueth, and is beloued, I ſpeake not of ſuppoſition, but of knowledge.
But for a man to beate her whom both by the lawes of God and nature he is bound to louelove, nouriſh, and cheriſh as his owne fleſh, it doth ſhew great want ofThe man that beateth and doth miſuſe his wife, is voyd of the knowledge of God and of his lawes. knowledge both of God and of his lawes in ſuch a man, for were the feare of God or wiſedome in them, they would rather ſtriue to gouerne them in another nature, I meane by louelove and clementcie, & not by force: beſids, what a ſcandall & reproach doth ſuch men raiſe vponupon themſeluesWhat ſcandals doe ariſe by varience betweene man and wife. amongſt their neighbours, kindred and acquaintance who liue thus diſcentiouſly, making themſelues a by-word or common talke among them, which many times are not onelyonly affrighted with them in their owne houſes with the outcries of thē & their children, but are forced to ſpend their time & their mony to make the man and his wife friends: oh fooliſh madnes in men that cannot keepe their owne follies priuate to themſelues, but they muſt make others acquainted with it!
I do remember that a reuerend diuine writing vponupon this matter ſaith, that hee that cannot gouerne his Wife without beating her, deſerues to be beaten himſelfe, becauſe hee did chuſe no better but ſuch a one whom hee could not rule without beating: of all waies I aſſuer thee this is the worſt to rule her by, for by this thou not only withdraweſt her louelove from thee, which otherwais to thy great comfort thou migh…eſtionioy, & for th… great good, but alſo hardneſt her heart againſt thee, & makeſt her careleſſe euen of thy good and her owne, yea many times ſuchDangerous euils ariſing by a mans vnkind dealing with his wife. hard and vnkind dealing of the husband vntounto the wife, cauſeth her to fall into ſuch inconuenience as bringeth the ruine both of her and of her husband and children, and is not this folly in men to wrong thēſelues thus by their miſgouernement, reſpecting more their owne will, then their good & quiet? yea all muſt bee …t afſide to giuegive place vntounto will, ſo it is not enough for ſuch a one to bee Lord and ruler ouer his wife as it is reaſon he ſhould, but he will ſhew it, and that not in priuate neither, but openly, taking a glory in doing it, thereby explaining the follies of her whoſe weakenes he ſhould hide, and opening his owne, whome wiſedome would he ſhould keep ſecret: beſides what euill examplesEuill examples in maiſters corrupting their families. giuegive ſuch men by theſe thinges vntounto their families? yea, what hauehave ſuch men to anſwer for vntounto God which thus corrupt their families by theſe euill examples? amongſt whom as a vine, it will extend it ſelfe into many branches: ſuch a ſin is not eaſily put away, he hath more need of Mary Magdalens teares, and with Peter to weepe bitterly, that is corrupt with ſuch a ſinne, and yet when he hath all done, he may winne (as I ſayd) more by louelove, then hee ſhall get by force.
But I hauehave not yet done with this branch of LoueLove, for I muſt tell you, that that man that doth not louelove and liue louingly with his Wife, the ſpirit of God is not in ſuch a one, and I proue it by his words, who was directed by the ſpirit of truth in that hee ſpake, I meane the bleſſed Apoſtle Saint Iohn, for he ſaith, that1. Iohn. 4. hee that dwelleth in louelove, dwelleth in God, and God in him: ſo then it muſt needes appeare that hee that dwelleth not in louelove, dwelleth not in God, nor God in him: yea, hee proueth his words by theſe following, hee that loueth not, knoweth not God, for God is louelove: yea, he goeth ſo farre, that hee teacheth vsus to know whether this louelove be in vsus, or no, for ſaith he, if we louelove one another, we will louelove God, & keepe his Commandements: alſo I know he ſpeaketh there of the children of God: but as it ought ſo to bee in them one towards another, ſo it ought alſo more eſpecially to bee in eueryevery man particularly towards his owne Wife, & here is a toutchſtone will tell eueryevery man truly whether he liue with his wife as hee ought to doe, or no, namely, if hee liue in louelove with her and according to the Commandements of God: S▪ Iohn ſaith, that if any man ſaith hee loueth God and hateth his brother, hee is a liar, and if a man ſay hee loueth God, and yet loueth not his wife, I ſay he is a lyar alſo.
But what ſhall I ſay? when I hauehave all done, I muſt leaue men to the conſideration of what I hauehave witten, and wiſh and intreat them to be wiſe & ſubmit themſelues vntounto the gouernement of the word of God, that ſo they may liue: quietly and louingly with their wiues, and not onelyonly ſo, but ioyfully (as the wiſe man ſaith) for ſurely hee hath obtayned a good portion that hath a wife that hee can liue ioyfully with, for if that a man do abound with wealth, ſo that he is able to giuegive vntounto himſelfe as much pleaſure as Salomon poſſeſſed as hisWhere peace and louelove doe want, all other things do ſeeme vnpleaſing. heart can deſire, yet if hee liue not peaceably at home & in louelove with his wife, euen all the reſt are but a burthen vntounto him: but the poore man (hauing little and yet liuing frendly, louingly and ioyfully with his wife) hath his heart more full of content then the rich man hath of all his wealth. Indeed as the old prouerbe ſayth, in louelove is no lacke,Where man wife agree, all thinges proſper well. 1. Sam. 6. for where louelove is vnited in the feare of God in the harts of man and wife, they will (like yoake fellowes) draw together the right way, like the two Milch Kine which brought the Arke of God in the new cart from the land of the Philiſtims, yea, they will plow together, & ſow together, & there is no doubt, but through the bleſſing of him which gouerneth them, they ſhall (ſo doing) receiue a plentifull harueſt together. Thus we hauehave found that the principall duty of the Husband vntounto the Wife is louelove, and doe alſo finde that this duty is much neglected, contemned, & euen deſpiſed of many, as appeareth by the euills dayly ariſing betwixt man & wife here before expreſſed, which I confeſſe to bee to many, yet there is one mayne defect in husbands which I may not ouer-paſſe, becauſe it is the greateſt breach of louelove that may bee, which I will ſpeake of in the Chapter following.
The Fourth Chapter.
THis duty of the Husband vntounto the Wife being wholy included in the bonds of louelove, it ſtretcheth it ſelfe farther into many branches: for we finde alſo by the word of God, that the Husband muſt dwell with his wife according to knowledge: ſo we ſee here that is not lawfull for the Husband to forſake his Wife, but howſeuer, whether it be in weale or woe, in riches or in pouerty, yet he muſt abide & dwell with her ſtill, onelyonly Adultry No cauſe whatſoeuer ſhould ſeparate man and wife, except Adultry.ſeparateth man and wife: for this cauſe a man may forſake his wife and ſhee her husband, but if the wife be not an Adultreſſe, thou muſt not forſake her, no, not for any other cauſe, I confeſſe the wiſe man ſaith, giuegive me any plague, but the plague of the tongue: and it may bee thy wife hath this fault, yet this is not a ſufficient cauſe for to forſake her, for our Saviour Chriſt tellethMat. 19. vsus, it is not lawfull for a man to put away his wife, except it be for whoredome: yea hee doth vtterly forbid to ſeparate whom God hath ioyned together: and ſaith further, that whoſoeuer ſhall put away his wife, except it bee for fornication, cauſeth her to commit Adultery, and whoſoeuerWhoſoeuer marrieth her that is diuorced, doth commit Adultry. ſhall marry her that is diuorced, committeth Adultry.
But the firebrands of hell, I meane the wicked and abominable Adulterers of our time, (neither reſpecting the word of God, nor yeelding any obedience to his Commandements, or fearing the iuſtice of his vengeance to come for their diſobedience) will notwithſtanding (like the ſwine poſſeſſed by the Deuill) runne violently to their deſtructions: But Saint Paull 1. Cor. 6.telleth them plainely, that neither Fornicators, Adulterers, wantons, An item for whoremongers and Adulterers.nor ſuch like, ſhall inherite the kingdome of God: whither they ſhall goe then I tremble to thinke of: for theſe men not regarding theſe things, will hauehave a wife here, & another there, one in this Country, and another in another country: or if thy cannot range abroad to doe thus, but muſt abide at home, they will keepe a whore euen there, and yet the poore wife muſt not know of it, or if ſhee doe, ſhee muſt not ſeeme to know it or dare to ſpeake of it, though ſhee bee neuer ſo much wronged by it: nay, this will not ſerue the beaſtly minds of ſome, but they will hauehave a whore in this corner, and another in another corner, and bee continually ſeeking of whores and whoriſh places, for all bread is ſweet to a whoremonger, ſaith the wiſe man, hee will not leaue off till hee periſh:Eccle. 23. a man that breaketh wedlocke, and thinketh thus in his heart, who ſeeth me, I am compaſſed about with darkeneſſe, the walls couer mee, no body ſeeth mee, whom need I to feare? the moſt high wil not remember my ſins: the ſame man ſayth, he ſhall bee puniſhed in the ſtreets of the citty, and ſhall bee chaſed like a young horſe foale, and when he thinketh not vponupon it, hee ſhall be taken: thus ſhall he be put to ſhame of eueryevery man, becauſe he would not vnderſtand the feare of the Lord.
But what ſpeake I of the wiſe mans words, whē God himſelfe ſaith Thou ſhalt not commit Adultry, Exodus. 20.and that thou ſhalt not couit thy neighbours Wife, nor his maide, nor his Daughter, and yet his wife, his maid, nor daughter, wil ſerue to ſatiſfie the beaſtly minds of many men in this wicked age, but wiues, maides, and all that they may any way allure to their wicked purpoſes they will thus abuſe: The Lord commanded there Deu. 23.ſhould bee no whore-keepers among his people the Iſraelites, but if all ſuch ſhould bee ſwept out of this kingdome, I thinke a great part of our land would be vnpeopled, for neuer was this ſin of whoredome & adultry at ſuch a haight as at this day it is amongſt, vsus amongſt young men it is now counted but a tricke of youth, & among others of more yeares which ſhould hauehave more grace, it is called the ſweet pleaſing ſin of Letchery.
Oh England, England! Sodom & Gomorah committed not more ſinne then thou dayly doſt, and theſe hauehave felt the heauy hand of God long ſince, conſuming them with fire and brimſtone from heauen, and thinkeſt thouHeb. 13. to eſcape? no, no, the bed vndefiled is honourable, but Whoremongers and Adulterers God will iudge. Saint Iohn telleth ſuchReu. 21. plainely, they ſhall hauehave their part in the lake that burneth with fire & brimſtone: you will thinke I am too bold to bee thus ſharpe with you, but I ſay the tongues of men can neuer ſpeake enough of this ſinne, for the Lord hath ſet himſelfe againſt ſuch, and will be aſwift witneſſe againſt them: (for ſaith he) They aſſemble themſelues Mala. 3.by companies in the Harlots houſes, and riſe vp in the morning like fed horſes, for eueryevery man neigheth Iere. 5.after his neighbours wife, and now marke what followes: ſhall I not viſit for theſe thinges ſayth the Lord, ſhall not my ſoule be auenged on ſuch a nation as this?
Woe be to you Whoremongers Whoremongers & Adulterers, doe not onelyonly draw vengeance on thē ſelues, but alſo on the nations among whom they liue.and Adulterers, who not onelyonly draw vengeance vpō your ſelues but even vponupon the whole nation wherein you liue, againſt whom the Lord maketh ready the arrowes of his vengeance, whoſe portion is in that lake of fire vnquenchable, Oh conſider this yee that forget God, leaſt hee tare you in Pſalme. 50.peeces, and there be none to helpe!
Regard the words of Salomon, keepe thee from the wicked woman, & flattery of the tongue of a ſtrange woman, deſire not her beauty in thine heart, neither let her take thee with her eye lids, for becauſe of the whoriſh woman, a man is brought to a morcel of bread: And a woman will hunt for Pro. 6.the precious life of a man: can a man take fire in his boſom & not be burnt, or can he goe vponupon coales, & his feete not be burnt: ſo he that goeth into his neighbours wife, ſhall not be innocent, whoſoeuer toucheth her: ſhould a man talke with one of theſe licentious liuers about ſome of his worldly affaires, he would thinke himſelfe wiſe enough to conferre with any man, & in the eyes of the world ſeeme ſo, & yet Salomon proueth him ot be but a foole, for (ſaith hee,) hee that doth it, deſtroyeth his owne ſoule, yea he ſhall find a wound & diſhonour, & his reproach ſhal neuer be put away: & againe in anothr place, The mouth of a ſtrange Pro. 22.woman is a pit, and hee with whom the Lord is angry, ſhall fall therein: and thus I proceed ſomewhat the more largely in opening this breach of wedlocke, to the end you may ſee into what dangers theſe men doe dayly run into, which liue not louingly & faithfully with their owne wiues, as the word of God enioyneth them to doe.
The Fift Chapter.
WEe ſee now by our laſt Chapter, how farre many husbands come ſhort of the performance of that duty, which by the word of God they are inioyned to performe vntounto their wiues, and the whole cauſe or chiefe ground we alſo ſee there to be the want of louelove, or rather of true louelove: for if there were in them that true louelove which the feare of God worketh in the heart of eueryevery good Chriſtian, then it would leade them to that knowledge wherewith S. Peter 1. Pet. 3.teacheth husbands to be furniſhed with: which I muſt a little further touch, for it is not enough for them to abide & dwel with their wiues, but they muſt dwell with them as men of knowledge, and men of vnderſtanding, and experienced in the word of God, yeelding themſelues wholy vntounto the guide of his word, and the obedience of his will and holy Commandements, this is the knowledge wherewith he inſtructeth them, and this will bring Husbands to performe that which Saint Paul teacheth, which is to louelove your wiues▪ Ephe. 5.as Chriſt loued his Congregatiō: that is with a holy, harty and a conſtantHusbands ought to liue with their wiues as men of knowledge, experienced in the word of God. louelove, for all theſe muſt bee performed by you: and except you labour to gather this knowledge from the word of God, as the Bee doth for her hony among the flowers, by your continual exerciſe & meditatiō therin aſſure your ſelues you ſhal neuer be able to performe your duties towards God, nor receiue true comfort by your Mariages.
Hee telleth you alſo, that you muſt giuegive honour vntounto the wife as vntounto the weaker veſſell, and becauſe ſhee is the weaker veſſel and more apt to frailty then thy ſelfe, thou muſt beare with her weakenes, and not expect to find that fulneſſe of content which happily through thy wiſedome thou wouldeſt ſhee ſhould performe vntounto thee in many things, for, for this cauſe alſo haſt thou obtayned thy wiſedome & thy knowledge and thy vnderſtanding, that thou mighteſt beare with the weakenes of thy companion: we reade, that when Samuell had annoynted Saul to bee1. Sam. 10. a King ouer the people, ſo ſoone as hee had annoynted him vntounto that kingly office, God gaue vntounto him another hart, fitting him thereby vntounto the place and calling he had appoynted him: ſo no doubt but thoſe men which he permitteth vntounto that honorable function of Marriage, he furniſheth with gifts fitting for that calling, for it is a matter of no ſmall waight when a man taketh vponupon him the gouernement of a womā, but if he rightly conſider what he taketh in hand, hee ſhall find he had need with Salomon to pray that the Lord will giuegive vntounto him wiſedome to rule & gouerne the wife whith he hath taken, as hee did for wiſedome to gouerne his people, & both the Husband & the Wife when they come together to pray with Tobias and Sarah, that the power of Tob. 8.the Deuill hauehave no domination ouer them, and ſo he ſhall be ſtrengthned and enabled to beare with the weakeneſſe of his companion.
Wee ſee if wee put ſtrong waters into a ſingle & weake glaſſe, it breaketh the glaſſe becauſe it wanteth ſubſtance of nature to beare it: and therefore we will put ſuch waters carefully into double glaſſes, which may conſerue and keepe them: ſo wee ſhould not ouerburthen the weake nature of the woman, by impoſing vponupon her, that which the husband himſelfe ought to performe, of which (I hauehave formerly ſpoken) and this is oneSimile. chiefe reaſon which ſhould mooue the man to deale kindly with his wife, euen her weaknes: for wee ſee if we handle veſſelsA reaſon ſhewing why a man ſhould deale kindly with his wife. of glaſſe and earth roughly or raſhly, we crack & breake them, and I would that men were as wiſe and carefull to conſider the weakenſſe of their wiues, and to deale kindly, gently, and louingly with them, ſo conſeruing and preſeruing that louelove which ought to bee betwixt them, and would be if it were not expulſed by their rough and vnkind dealing with them.
And there is another reaſon or chiefe ground to be conſidered greater then any of the former, which ſhould draw men to the performance of this their duty, for ſo St. Paul doth teach vsus alſo, (which is) that eueryevery man ſhould Another more effectuall reaſon for the ſame cauſehauehave a ſpeciall care to performe theſe duties impoſed vponupon him, the rather or for this cauſe, becauſe they are beires with you of the grace of life, elected by the fauor of God in Chriſt Ieſus to that fellowſhip of Saints wherein you your ſelues hope to bee nūbred, & as dearely beloued of God as your ſelues, bought out of the power of Satan by the precious blood of his deare Sonne, as well as you, and heyres alſo of that eternall life which you your ſelues hope to enioy: and therefore if you your ſelues thinke to liue as Saints in Heauen, you must liue together as Saints here on earth. Theſe thinges as a loadeſtone ſhould draw you to the performance of thoſe dutyes which you ought to performe if you rightly conſider it.
And ſo our bleſſed Apoſtle hauing giuen this godly & prudent counſaile vntounto Husbands to performe vntounto their Wiues, giueth a reaſon alſo wherefore theſe thinges ſhould or ought to be thus performed, which is, that your prayers be not let or hindred, as if hee ſhould ſay, if you liue diſcōtently or frowardly one withWhen man & wife agree not as they ought, they cannot pray as they ſhould. another, it is vnpoſſible that you ſhould performe that deuotion in your praiers, which you ought to performe to God, or hauehave them accepted of him as you would, & therfore if you would hauehave God to heare you when you pray vntounto him, or to grant you the things which you pray for and deſire of him, agree and liue in louelove together, that ſo your praying together may receiue comfort together, and that the God of louelove may bleſſe your Loues together.
I beſeech you hauehave a care of theſe thinges, and ſeparate not yourſelues in theſe holy actions, for I know there be too many infected with theſe ſins amongſt vsus in theſe dayes, which liue vntowardly and frowardly God knowes, & yet feare not to preſent themſelues before his diuine Maieſty in this caſe, oh dangerous thing! hath God ioyned you together that you might be one, and will you diuide your ſelues and then appeare before him, and bring him but halfe, when his due is to hauehave the whole, thinke you hee will bee ſerued thus? no, hee is like the true Mother, which wil not hauehave1. King. 3. her child diuided, he will either hauehave the whole or none, he will not hauehave you thus to ſeparate your ſelues, and then to preſume to come in his preſence: but if any contention do ariſe betwixt the Man and his Wife, quench the fire before it doe burne too farre, reconcile yourſelues one to another ſpeedily, that your loues may not fade, nor your hearts ſtray, but ioyne together in God, that ſo your prayers be not interupted, but accepted of him, as you ſee the word of God teacheth you: & thus briefely for the duty of Husbands.