The Victory of Patience, Chapter 19
CHAP. 19. That s…ffering is the only way to prevent suffering.
3 BEcause suffering is the only way to prevent suffering. Revenge being one of those remedies which (not seldome) proves more grievous than the disease it selfe? When once Zantippe the Wife of Socrates, in the open street pluckt his cloake from his back; some of his acquaintance counselled him to strike her: Yea (quoth he) you say well, that while we are brawling and fighting together, every one of you may clap us on the backe and cry, hoe, well said, to it Socrates: yea, well done Zantippe, the wisest of the twaine. When Aristippus was asked by one in dirision, where the great high friendship was become that formerly had bin betweene him and Estines? he answers, it is asleep, but I will goe and awake it, and did so, least their enemies should make it a matter of rejoycing. When Philip of Macedon was told that the Grecians spake evill words of him, notwithstanding hee did them much good, and was withall counselled to chastise them; he answers, Your counsell is not good; for if they now speake evill of us having done them go odonely, what would they then if we should do them any harme? And at another time being counselled either to banish or put to death one who had slandered him; hee would doe neither of both, saying, It was not a sufficient cause to condemne him, and for banishing, it was better not to let him stir out of Macedonia where all men knew that hee lyed, thon to send him among strangers, who not knowing him, might admit his slanders for truth. And this made Chrysippus when one complained to him that his friend had reproached him privately, Answer: Ah, but chide him not, for then he will doe as much in publike. Neglect will sooner kill an injurie than revenge. These tongue-Squibs or crackers of the braine will dye alone if we revive them not: the best way to have them forgotten by others, is first to forget them our selves. Yea, to contemne an enemie, is better than either to feare him or answer him. When the Passenger gallops by, as if his feare made him speedy, the Cur followes him with open mouth and swiftnesse; let him turne to the brawling Cur and he will be more fierce; but let him ride by in a confident neglect, and the Dog will never stir at him, or at least wil soon give over and be quiet. To vex other men is but to tutor them how they should againe vex us. Wh…n two friends fall out, if one bee not the wiser, they turne love into anger and passion, passion into evill words, words into blowes, and when they are fighting, a third adversary hath a faire advantage to insult over them both. As have you not sometimes seene two Neighbours like two Cocks of the Game peck out one anothers eyes to make the Lawyers sport; it may be kill them. As while Iudah was hot against Israel, and Israel hot against Iudah, the King of Syria smote them both; at least Sathan that common and arch-enemy will have us at advantage. For as man delighteth when two Dogs, or two Cocks are a fighting, to incourage them and prick them forward to the combate. Even so doth Sathan deale with us; controversies like a paire of Cudgels are throwne in by the Devill, and taken up by male-contents, who baste one another while he stands by and laughs. Yea, as the Master of the Pit oft sets two Cocks to fight together unto the death of them both; and then after mutuall conquest suppeth per-chance with the fighters bodies. Even so, saith Gregory doth the Devill deale with men. He is an enemy that watcheth his time, and while wee wound one another, hee wounds and wins all our soules. Thus like the Frog and the Mouse in the Fable, while men fight eagerly for a toy, the Ki…e comes, that Prince and chiefe Fowle that ruleth in the Aire▪ and snatcheth away both these great warriers; or like two Emmets in the Mole-hill of this earth, wee fight for the mastery, in meane while comes the Robin-red-breast and picks both up, and so devours them. But on the other side, by gentlenesse wee may as much pleasure our selves. It is said of Aristides when he perceived the open scandall which was like to arise by reason of the contention sprung up betweene him and Themistocles, that hee besought him mildely after this manner; Sir, we both are no meane men in this Commonwealth; our dissention will prove no small offence unto others, nor disparagement to our selves; wherefore good Themistocles let us be at one againe; and if we will needs strive, let us strive who shall excell other in vertue and love. And wee reade of Euclides, that when his Brother (in a variance betweene them) said, I would I might dye if I be not revenged of thee; he answered againe, nay let me dye for it, if I perswade thee not otherwise before I have done: by which one word he presently so wonne his brothers heart, that he changed his minde, and they parted friends. And this was Davids way of overcomming, 1 Sam. 24. He whose Harp had wont to quiet Sauls frenzie, now by his kindnesse doth calme his fury, so that now he sheds teares instead of blood: here was a victory gotten and no blow stricken. The King of Israel set bread and water before the host of the King of Syria, when he might have slaine them, 2. Kin. 6.23. What did he loose by it, or had he cause to repent himselfe? No: he did thereby so prevent succeeding quarrels, that as the Text saith, The bands of Aram came no more into the Land of Israel; so every wise Christian will doe good to them that doe hurt to him; yea, blesse and pray for them that curse him, as our Saviour adviseth: neither is he a foole in it, for if grace comes (and nothing will procure it sooner than prayers and good examples) though before they were evill enemies; now they shall neither be evill nor enemies. It was a witty answer of Socrates, who replied when one askt him, why he tooke such a mans bitter railing so patiently; It is enough for one to be angry at a time. For if a wise man contend with a foolish man, saith Salomon, whether he be angry or laugh, there is no rest, Pro, 29.9. Whereas gentle speech appeaseth wrath, and patience bridleth the secret pratlings of mockers, and blunteth the points of their reproach. Rage is not engendred but by the concurrence of cholers, which are easily produced one of another, and borne at an instant. When the stone and the steele meets, the issue ingendred from thence is fire: whereas the Sword of anger being strucke upon the soft pillow of a mild spirit, is broken. The shot of the Cannon hurts not wooll and such like yeelding things, but that which is hard, stubborne and resisting. He is fuller of passion than reason, that will flame at every vaine tongues puffe. A man that studies revenge keepes his owne wounds greene and open, which otherwise would heale and do well. Anger to the soule is like a coale on the flesh or garment; cast it off suddenly it doth little harme, but let it lye, it frets deepe. Wherefore saith one, their malice shall sooner cease than my unchanged patience. A small injury shall go as it comes, a great injury may dine or sup with me, but none at all shall lodge with me; for why should I vex my selfe because another hath vexed me? That were to imitate the foole that would not come out of the pound, saying, they had put him in by Law, and he would come out againe by Law: or Ahab, who because he could not have his will on Naboth, would be revenged on himselfe. As the mad man teares his owne haire because he cannot come at his enemies: or little children, who one while forbeare their meat if you anger them; another time if you chance to take away but one of their Gugawes amongst many other toyes which they play withall, will throw away the rest, and then fall a puling and crying out right. Or Dogs which set upon the stone that hath hurt them with such irefull teeth that they hurt themselves more than the thrower hurt them; and feele greater smart from themselves than from their enemy: which makes Archelaus say, it is a great evill, not to be able to suffer evill. And a worthy Divine of ours, I will rather suffer a thousand wrongs than offer one, I will suffer an hundred rather than returne one, I will suffer many ere I will complaine of one, and endeavour to right it by contending; for saith he, I have ever found, that to strive with my Superiour is furious, with my equals, doubtfull, with my inferiour, …ordid and base, with any full of unquietnesse. Satyrus, knowing himselfe cholerick, and in that whirry of minde apt to transgresse, when he but suspected ill language from any, he would stop his eares with wax, lest the sense of it should cause his fierce blood to seeth in his distempered skin. And good reason; for the Emperour Nerva, by passionate anger got a Feaver that killed him. And the Emperour Valentinianus dyed by an eruption of blood through anger. And Vinceslaus King of Bohemia, in his rage of choler against his Cup-bearer fel into a palsie that killed him. Againe, Caesar, although he could moderate his passions having in that civill garboyle intercepted a packet of Letters written to Pompey, from his Favourites, brake them not open but burnt them immediately. And Pompey committed those Letters to the fire before he read them, wherein he expected to finde the cause of his griefe. All three upon wise and mature ground, that they might not play booty against themselves in furthering an enemies spite. And certainly if wee well consider it, we shal meet with vexations enough that we cannot avoid if we would never so faine. Aud yet some (as if they did delight to vex their owne soules) will be very inquisitive to know what such an one said of them in private: but had they as much wit as jealousie, they would argue thus with themselves; smal injuries I would either not know, or not minde, or knowing them I would not know the Author; for by this I may mend my selfe and never malice the person.
I might goe on and shew you that Greece and Asia were set on fire for an Apple. That not a few have suffered a sword in their bowels, because they would not suffer the lye in their throats. As how few of these Salamāders who are never well, but when they are in the fire of contention, are long lived? The Raven, the Elephant, and the Hart, which have no gall: (Patient Christians) one of them outlive many of the other. But two and twenty yards is enough for a peece.