Sin Stigmatized, Part 2 · Section 202
§ 202.
5 ANother reaſon why we ſhould ſeparate our ſelves from their ſociety, is, 5. That we may he at peace with all: which is not poſſible, if wee keep them company.that according to the Apoſtles rule, ſ… far as is poſſible, we may have peace with all men, which is no way obtainable, but by a ſeparation. A wicked man (ſaith Salomon) is abomination to the juſt … and he that is upright in his way, is abomination to the wicked Prov. 29.27. if ſo, either no communion, or no peace.
Believers, and ſuch as are enemies to the Croſſe of Chriſt, can never be reconciled, at leaſt in heart. What communion can righteouſneſſe have with unrighteouſneſſe? You may as well tye a ſure knot betweene a Cobweb and a Cable, as a true and faſt love knot, between the child of God and a wicked man. Theſe two yoked together, agree like the Harp and the Harrow. they are as ſuitable, as a wooden Legg and a Thigh of fleſh: which makes the Apoſtle Rom. 12.18. in enjoyning us to have peace with all men, to add, if it bee poſſible: and in another place to ſay, be not unequally yoked with infidels, for as wee ſhould not be yoked with infidels; ſo wee ſhould not be yoked with common drunkards, and ſwearers, nor with Atheiſts, vvhichwhich are no better then infidels; for that alſo is to be unequally yoked, unleſſe vve be Atheiſts too.
As the Iewes might not conſort vvith the Canaanites: ſo vvee may not conſort vvith them, vvhichwhich are like Canaanites. Wiſe Salomon chargeth us from God, that vvee ſhould not keepe company vvith gluttons and drunkards, Proverbs 23.20. and the Apoſtle enjoyneth us, not to have any fellowſhip, nor ſo much as eat with a drunkard, 1 Cor. 5.11. and that vve ſhould have no fellowſhip with theſe unfruitfull workes of darkneſſe, or, if unvvittingly and unvvillingly vve bee thruſt into any ſuch ſociety, vve muſt not imitate, but reprove them, Epheſians 5.11. and vvee profeſſe our ſelves the ſervants of God: novv they are bad ſervants, vvho vvill keep company vvith their maſters enemies, eſpecially, after he hath ſtreightly charged them to the contrary.
Alaſſe! vvhat ſhould vvee doe in the preſence of baſe perſons, vvhen even our ſober ignorance, in ill courſes, is more then diſeſteemed of the vvorld? Yea, vvhen it is not enough for them to be bad themſelves, except they raile at the good? vvhen if there be one in a company, that abhorres impious language, they vvill blaſpheme on purpoſe to vex him? vvhen they vvill thinke themſelves ſlighted, if they be not ſent away drunk? when to depart ſober, is held incivility? and we cannot talk idly enough, nor doe lewdly enough, to beare them company; we can neither ſay as they ſay, nor be ſilent when we ſee and heare their baſenes. As whom would it not ſtirre, to heare oaths ſtrive for number, with words; ſcoffs, with oathes; vaine ſpeeches, with both? we love neither to bite, nor fawne; yet we can not forbeare to ſpeak the naked truth; which if we do, will breed a quarrel. As for inſtance; one, jeſts pleaſantly with his Maker; another, makes himſelfe ſport with Scripture; a third, fils his mouth with oathes of ſound; a fourth, ſcoffs at the religious; one, ſpeaks villany; another, laughs at it; a third, defends it; one, makes himſelfe a ſwine, another, a divell. Now who, that is not all earth, can endure it? Yea, vvho, having grace, can heare ſuch vvickedneſſe, and feeleth not ſome ſparke of holy indignation ariſe in him, vvhile he thinkes of it? or vvho having not loſt his ſpirituall ſent, can endure the ſavour of ſuch noyſome and ſtinking breath, as their rotten lunges ſend forth. Well born children are touched to the quick, vvith the injuries of their Parents: and not thus to be moved, is to confeſſe ourſelves baſtards. Indeed, men of ſteele ſtomackes can digeſt any diſcourſe, though never ſo courſe; but the gracious knovv, that as they muſt render an account for every idle word, ſo likevviſe for their idle ſilence, for in this caſe not to reprove them either by word, or geſture, is to do the ſame things in judgement and conſcience, which the other doth actually. Every evill we ſee doth either vex, or infect us. The very ſight of ſinne makes a man either ſad, or guilty: if we ſee it, and be not ſorrowful, we are ſinful. If Lot had not beene vexed vvith the beaſtly Sodomites, God had beene vexed vvith him: yea, in ſuch a caſe not to bee very angry, is to make God very angry. Ely heard of his ſonnes impiety, no doubt vvith griefe enough, but not vvith anger enough; therefore he is puniſhed with hearing of their deſtruction, that was too remiſſe in hearing of their tranſgreſſion. It is eaſie to be guilty of anothers wickedneſſe, even our very permiſſion appropriates crimes to us: we need no more guiltineſſe of any ſinne, then our willing tolleration. All ſinnes which we give allowance to, being committed, or not hindered by us, if we may, are ours, as if we committed them: firſt, Commanders; 2. Abbettors; 3. Counſellors; 4. Conſenters; 5. Commenders; 6. Connivers; 7. Concealers; 8. not hinderers; each of theſe will be found guilty before Gods Tribunall. What ſaith the Prophet to King Iehoſaphat, wouldeſt thou helpe the wicked, and not only ſo, but wouldest thou love them that hate the Lord? therefore for this thing the wrath of the Lord is upon thee, 2 Chron. 19.2. we need doe no more to bring the wrath of God upon us, then even to love and favour thoſe which hate him.
How much better then to oppoſe thy friend by reproving him, then that God ſhould reprove thee for being at one with him.
But this is no friendly part: yes, the Scripture affirmes, Objections anſwered.that not to tell ones Brother plainely of his faults, at leaſt, if there be probability of doing good, is to hate him in his heart, Levit, 19.17. And Philoſophy tell us, that is truly perfect love, which, to profit and doe good, feareth not to hurt or offend; that admonitions and corrections are the cheifeſt offices of friendſhip. Diogenes when they called him Dog, for his ſharpe kinde of rebuking, would anſwer, That other Dogs uſed to bite their enemies, but he his friends, for their greater good. and Scipio the elder, when his friends, for ſo doing, turned his enemies, was able to ſay, I have given mine enemies as much cauſe to love me, as my friends.
Phocion when a friend of his would have caſt himſelfe away, would not ſuffer him, ſaying, I was made thy friend for this purpoſe: and to King Antipater, thou canſt not have me both for thy friend and flatterer. Indeed, a flattering friend is a bitter enemy, yea (as one ſweetly) no enemy can be ſo mortall, as thoſe officious Clyents, whoſe flattery ſoothes a man up in wickedneſſe; for they are traytors to the ſoule, and by a pleaſing violence kill the beſt part eternally. Whence Euripides exhorts men to get ſuch friends, as would not ſpare to diſpleaſe them, ſaying, friends are like wines, thoſe that being new are hard and harſh, prove beſt; the moſt pleaſing, are leaſt laſting: and indeed, he that loves not ſuch a friend, hates himſelfe.
A wiſe man will ſay to his friend, love heartily, and then ſpeake what thou wilt. And for a man not to chide his friend, leaſt he ſhould offend him, is as if (when he were ready to be drowned) he ſhould feare to catch him by the haire of the head, leſt he ſhould looſe a few of them. Wherfore either let them abide thee no friend to their faults, or no friend to themſelves.
And what if admonition and reproofe be as unwelcome to thy friend, as water into a Ship? what if it ſound no better to him, then muſick out of tune; or taſt no ſweeter, then bitter pills, which ſicke men take with an unwilling willingneſſe? wilt thou neglect the office of a friend, to avoid the ſuſpition of an enemy?
Indeed, if thou meete with a contentious foole, thou ſhalt doe wiſely, in not anſwering whatſoever he objects: for it is more policy and diſcretion to gaine a friend without trouble, then a foe with it: and our Saviour ſaith, give ye not that which is holy to Dogs, neither caſt ye your pearle before Swine; least they tread them under their feete, and turning againe all to rent you, Matth. 7.6.
Againe, as in Gods and their owne behalfe we are bound to reprove them: ſo in our neighbours alſo, to whom, in this caſe, we owe a duty: for, admit we are in company when, and where our brothers good name is taken away by falſe report; it is our duty to defend the truth, in his behalfe: we muſt neither backbite others, nor be willing to give eare unto backbiters of others. It was an honeſt ſpeech of one; as I will be my preſent friends ſelfe, ſo I'le he my abſent friends deputy, to ſay for him what he would, and cannot ſpeake for himſelfe.
But thou wilt aske me. What need men trouble themſelves with that which ſo little concernes them?
My anſwere ſhall be ſuch another queſtion. What needed Moſes to have afflicted himſelfe with the afflictions of others, that he might worke their deliverance, when himſelfe was at eaſe and pleaſure in one court of Pharaoh? what needed Ionathan have purchaſed his fathers diſpleaſure, and brought his owne life in jeopardy, that he might juſtifie David in his uprightneſſe, and ſave his life? what needed Calvin in the yeare 1556, when Perin had conſpired againſt the eſtate of Geneva, have runne into the midſt of their naked ſwords, to appeaſe the tumult? what needs the hand caſt it ſelfe betwixt a blow and the head, though it be cut off by this meane? what needs the eye ſerve more to the uſe of the other members, in being watchfull rightly to direct them, then for it ſelfe? A good heart cannot abide to be happy alone; which is a religious anſwer, to a reaſonable queſtion unreaſonably moved. Yea, admit it were not a duty for one member to ſeeke the good of another, or of the whole, and that God had not enjoyned us ſo to doe: I am ſure it is a pardonable fault, to doe leſſe good to our ſelves, that we may doe more good to, and for others.
But ſuppoſe we offend them not this way; yet we ſhall another, if we keepe them company. The naturall man conceits of himſelfe, farre beyond what another eſteemes him: and in caſe he finds he is undervalued, will flye in your face, and perhaps doe you more miſcheife, then can eaſily be repaired: as that was done in one quarter of an houre by our firſt Parents, which tended to the ruine of them, and all mankind. It is uſuall with drunkards to kiſſe when they meete, and kill when they part. Drunken Alexander killed Clytus, for whom ſober Alexander would have killed himſelfe. The Danes and Norwayes once purpoſing for England, fell drunke on ſhipboard, and ſo ſlaſht one another, that there was an end of their voyage. Out of their gallant diſpoſition, you ſhall have one kill another, upon the interpretation of a word; a manifeſt confeſſion, that their life is not much worth, ſith they will ſell it ſo good cheape: yea, there are not wanting of them that reſemble Fimbria of Rome, who meeting a Citizen that he hated, gave him a deadly thruſt into the body with his ſword, and the next day entred an action againſt him, that he had received but part of his blade into his body, and not all, as he meant it.
Yea, perhaps they may make you to doe that which you never dreamt of: like Herod, who cut off Iohn Baptiſt's head, only to anſwer the expectation of the ſtanders by, Matth. 14.9. As for flattery it never wants welcome, while ſelfe-love is at home: but the plaine dealing man cannot live among theſe Vipers, and not be ſtung by them: yea, he lives moſt in trouble, that moſt ſeekes to have peace with them by a familiarity.
Well then, if they are ſo offenſive to the ſtomacke of our company, that they will not let us be at peace; our beſt way wil be to ſpevv them out, to deale with our old vicious conſorts, as the Fox in the Fable did by his Fleas: who wading backward into the water, by degrees, drew them all into a lock of Wooll, which he had in his mouth, and then left it ſwimming; even leave them, without taking leave of them; or if you like not to teare friendſhip aſunder upon the ſudden, you may unſowe it by little and little. He that would not continue a friend, may but neglect him, and have his ayme.