The Drunkards Character, Section 16 – Section 18
§ 16
2 NEither are his diseases and infirmities fewer then his deformities:His inward infirmities. for …ee but his body opened, and it will appeare like a stinking and rotten sepulcher; for excessive and intemperate drinking hath brought upon him a wo…ld of diseases and infirmities, because this sinne by little and little quencheth the naturall heate, and drownes the vitall spirits, whereby above all it impaires the health, debilitateth all the members, turning strength into weakenesse; health, into irrecoverable sicknesse; it being the seminary of incurable diseases, which shorten the life; the procurer of all infirmities, and acceleration of death; which is the reason that men are ordinarily now so short lived, in respect of that they have beene heretofore.
Neither can there be any other cause alleaged, why men in this our age are so weake, diseased, and short lived, but our excessive drunkennesse and intemperance.
It is true indeed, that the world now waxing old, and, as it were, hoareheaded, cannot generate children of such strength and vigour as it did in time of youth and full strength; and therefore wee must needs decline, as the world declineth: it is true also, that the mother earth is infeebled with much bearing, and hath her strength much abated with so innumerable childbirths, and being now come to her cold melancholy age, cannot bring forth her fruits so full of vertue and strength, and so fit for the nourishment of our bodies, as shee did in former times: but that there should be such a change, so suddaine and extraordinary, in the great difference of our health, strength, and long life, betwixt this our age, and that which went next before it; can be imputed unto nothing more, then that now drunkennesse and intemperance is, after an extraordinary manner, increased; whereby the naturall and vitall heate of men is drowned, and extinguished, before it be neare spent; like a candle cast into the water, before it be halfe burned.
Indeed, drunkards pretend they drinke healthes, and for health. Yea, doubtlesse they thinke wine another kinde of Panace, which is good for all diseases; or some Moly, good against all sorcery and mischiefe. But to whom, saith Salomon, are all kinde of diseases, infirmities, deformities, if not to Drunkards? Who can recount the hurts that by this meanes come to the whole body, especially the head, stomack, liver, and the more noble parts? Who can recite the Crudities, Rhumes, Gowts, Dropsies, Aches, Imposthums, Apoplexes, Inflammations, Pluresies, Consumptions (for though he devours much, yet hee is the leaner every way) with the Falling-sicknesse, and innumerable other distempers hence ensuing? which Drunkards know better by experience, then I how to reckon up. To whom are pearle faces, Palsies, Headakes, if not to Drunkards? What so soone brings suddaine old age? What so much as swilling blowes up the cheekes with wind, fills the nose and eyes with fier, loads the hands and legs with water; and, in short, plagueth the whole man with diseases of a Horse, the belly of a Cowe, the head of an Asse &c. almost turning him into a very walking dunghill. Believe a man in his owne Art; The distempered body, the more it is filled, the more it is spilled, saith Hippocrates: and to this the Prophet sets his seale, Hosea: 7. 5.
And indeed but for the throats indulgence; Paracelsus (for all his Mercury) had dyed a begger: which made Callisthenes tell Alexander, that hee had rather feede upon graines with Diogenes, in his dish; then carrouse the juyce of grapes with him, in this standing cup; for of all the gods, said hee, I love not Aesculapius.
In a word: though wine, being moderately taken, is physicall; yet, if it be taken immoderately, there is nothing more banefull, saith St. Austin: for by it the body is weakened, strength decayed, the members dissolved, the whole body distempered, and out of order; so that the Drunkard drawes death out of that which preserves other mens lives.
That many have perished by this meanes we read, Eccl. 37. 30. 31, & if many then, surely many millions now: for in former ages it was as rare, as now it is common. For wee read that the Locrians would not permit their Magistrates to drinke wine; whereas now with us, the meanest (by their good wills) will drinke nothing els. We read also that the ancient Romans would not suffer their women to drinke wine; whereas many of ours are like Cleio, who was so practised in drinking, that shee durst challeng all men whatsoever to trye masteries who could drinke most, and overcome all. And lastly, wee reade that they would never drinke wine before they were twenty yeares of age; whereas many of our children are halfe killed, before they are borne, with distempered drinkes: at least, when they are borne, no day, no meale, must they be without sipping downe wine, their over indulgent parents (who like Apes, many times kill their young with making much of them) will have it so: whereupon not a few become Drunkards and company keepers very betime, and before any would imagine; as St. Hierome telleth of one, that swore by her love she was lewd or naught so early, that no one so much as dreamed of it.
In a word, wine and strong drink hath drowned more men, then the sea hath devoured; and more dye of surfeits, then by the sword. Yea, as drunkennesse hath drowned more soules, then all the sinnes of Sodome: so it hath drowned more bodies, then were drowned in the generall deluge of Noahs flood.
§ 17.
VVHy, but saith the Tipler, Wine,An objection answered. if not received to surfeite, refresheth the spirits and cheares the heart, as is well knowne; I finde it, I feele it, I perceive it doth me good, and I will believe mine own eyes, and tast, before Hippocrates, or ten Salomons. Salomon answers in effect thus much, Prov. 23. 29. to 35. Bee not deceived with shewes and shadowes; a man may be drunke, though his eyes be not out; and may be deceived, though his eyes be in too. All is not gold that glisters, all is not paid that is promised: wine promiseth much for the present, but it will deceive thee in the end: it promiseth health, but it payes sicknesse; it promiseth comfort, but thou shalt find sorrow; it promiseth helpe, but thou shalt receive hurt; it is a poysoned potion, a flattering, but cruell Hyaena: much like that double headed serpent Amphisbaena, or one of those Locusts, Apoc. 9. 10. that carries a sting in the taile, though the face bee smiling and flattering. Not that wine in it selfe (which is a good creature of God) is any way evill, or the use of it unlawfull. Lycurgus was out, when he destroyed all the Vines to prevent drunkennesse; he had done farre better, if he had made more Wells, that so the heat of the wine might have beene alayed with the coldnesse of the water. For though God will not allow us to be drunk with wine, yet he doth not forbid us to drinke wine: use a little wine for thy stomacks sake, and thine often infirmites, sayes Paul to Timothy, 1 Tim. 5. And give strong drink to him that is ready to perish, and wine to them that have griefe of heart, are the words of the Holy Ghost, Prov. 31. 6. But a little proofe will serve the turne to perswade men that wine is lawfull; all the matter is, how to have them use it lawfully.
And thus the drunkard is injurious to his body. First, by deforming it. Secondly, by weakning and disabling it, whereby his life is lingringly, and by little and little consumed. But this is not all, for
§ 18.
THirdly, as if he scorned to goe to hisThe Drunkard his own executioner. grave in peace, he strives to doe execution upon himselfe; either by drinking untill his skinne and guts crack againe, as how many have drunk themselves dead; how many have even burst themselves with drinking, and so dyed, as it were with the weapon in their belly, being taken away in Gods just wrath? &c. Or secondly, by a frequent exposing himselfe to divers miserable accidents, yea fearefull and lamentable mishaps; for, as if the proverbe (A drunken man never takes harme) were good Scripture, hee careth not what way he goeth in the darke, what falls be taketh, how he knocks, breakes, and maymes himselfe, whereby he often batters his face, bruiseth his body, breaks his armes, leggs, and many times his neck; what bridges hee passeth over, whereby sometimes he falleth into the water, and is drowned; what hedges he lyes under, where even Snakes have beene known to creepe down drunkards throats into their bellies, as they have layen asleepe in the fields: all which the Philosopher considering, he compared one drunk to a running Coach, without a Coachman to guide it.
Or thirdly,A…ward pot-valiant will kil and …lay. by running into quarrels when hee is drunke: as what else but the pot breeds so many brawles, quarrels, debates, duels, stabbs, murthers, with such like dangerous and bitter fruits; for while the wine workes, they resemble those fishes, which love to be in violent streams and flood-gates, but doe dye in still waters: which the Egyptians observing, made them abhorre all wine, for as Pl…tarch reports, they did never use any (untill the time of Psammeticus) so much as in their sacrifices or drinke offerings; upon conceit, that it was the blood of those Gyants, which, they had heard, did once make warre against God. And S. Augustine affirmes, that the Manichees could not abide it, as being the gall (as they foolishly thought) of the prince of darknesse.
Yea, who will sooner kill and …lay then cowards, when once they are pot valiant? I have knowne ere now a very Dametas, guilty of no little courage, and suspected of true valour: as who will not thinke him both a valiant and excellent Pilot, that dares brave a whole fleet out of a simple Cockboate.
I deny not but such an ones discourse may sometimes sound big, and yet meane nothing: cowards being most forward, both in giving charge with the tongue, and recoyling backe with the foot: yea, you shall see a man looke like the foure windes in painting, as if hee would blow away the enemy; and yet, at the very first onset, suffer feare and trembling to dresse themselves in his face apparently: and commonly where is least heart, there is most tongue; swelling words being like the report of a great Ordnance, which doth only blaze, and cracke, and smoake, and stinke, and vanish. And lightly if wee note such an one, hee seldome unbuttons his tumored breast, but when hee findes none to oppose the bignesse of his lookes and tongue, but this holds not alwaies for sure I am, many do that in a Tavern, which they repent at Tyborne; and nothing more common, then for drunkards to kisse when they meet, and kill when they part.